Master of Change: Brad Stulberg On Rugged Flexibility & The Neuroscience Of Expectations
Aug 28, 2023
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Brad Stulberg, a sustainable excellence expert and bestselling author, dives into the art of embracing change and resilience. He introduces the concept of rugged flexibility, advocating for a flexible identity to navigate life's inevitable transitions. The discussion covers tragic optimism, the delicate balance between realistic expectations and hope, and the significance of gut health in resilience. Stulberg also emphasizes the importance of mindfulness and being present, encouraging listeners to view challenges as growth opportunities while maintaining core values.
Change is not something that happens to us, but rather something we are constantly in conversation with, shifting our mindset from having to being can make us less fragile to change.
Maintaining core values while being flexible in how we express them allows us to navigate change with greater resilience.
Defining core values that align with who we want to be serves as a guiding compass for decision-making and navigating change.
Embracing a mindset of being allows for greater acceptance and flexibility in the face of change, reducing the suffering caused by attachment to external outcomes.
To effectively navigate change and disorder, it is crucial to name and acknowledge the emotions experienced during these periods, as effective labeling of emotions can lead to clearer thinking and productive action.
Deep dives
The Concept of Change: Embracing Life's Instability
The podcast episode explores the idea that change is not something that happens to us, but rather something we are constantly in conversation with. By shifting our mindset from having to being, we become less fragile to change. The speaker emphasizes the importance of defining ourselves in ways of being and how this can lead to greater resilience and adaptability in an ever-changing world.
Rugged Flexibility: Balancing Stability and Adaptation
The podcast discusses the concept of rugged flexibility, where stability is achieved through the ability to adapt and change. Examples such as elite athletes diversifying their identities or embracing new pursuits are shared. By maintaining core values while being flexible in how we express them, we can navigate change with greater resilience.
The Power of Core Values: Guiding Actions and Behaviors
The speaker highlights the importance of identifying and defining core values that align with who we want to be, as these values serve as a guiding compass for decision-making. By adhering to these values, we can navigate change and make choices that align with our desired sense of self.
Having versus Being: A Mindset Shift for Resilience
The podcast explores the distinction between having and being, where having implies attachment and ownership, while being suggests a more fluid and essential relationship with people, things, or skills. Embracing a mindset of being allows for greater acceptance and flexibility in the face of change, reducing the suffering caused by attachment to external outcomes.
Navigating Change and Disorder
Change and disorder are inevitable aspects of life that can provide opportunities for growth and transformation. While embracing a growth mindset and seeking meaning can be beneficial in most circumstances, it is important to recognize that there are times when it is better to focus on getting through the challenging experiences rather than forcing growth or meaning. Giving oneself permission to let things suck and acknowledging the absence of immediate growth can be necessary for healing and moving forward.
Naming Emotions and Creating Space
To effectively navigate change and disorder, it is crucial to name and acknowledge the emotions experienced during these periods. By labeling and naming emotions, individuals create separation between themselves and the emotions, allowing for a mental and emotional space to process and make plans to move forward. Effective labeling of emotions can help activate the seeking pathway in the brain, leading to clearer thinking and productive action.
The Power of Adaptability and Resilience
Being adaptable and resilient is key in successfully navigating change and disorder. Recognizing that change is an ongoing process and that one's expectations and plans may need to be adjusted can help individuals embrace a more flexible mindset. By maintaining a continuing awareness, also known as Zanshin in Aikido, individuals can see the bigger picture, look for alternative paths, and make better choices that lead to growth and evolution.
Finding Meaning Through Disorder
While finding meaning and growth can be valuable outcomes of going through challenging experiences, it is important to note that not every situation may lend itself to immediate growth or meaning. Some experiences simply suck and do not require extracting profound personal growth. In such cases, the focus should be on getting through and letting go of the pressure to find meaning. Furthermore, the timing for finding growth and meaning may vary, and it is not always immediate. With time, meaning can reveal itself, and individuals can make sense of their experiences, allowing for personal growth and transformation.
Mindset: Embracing Change and Accepting Reality
The podcast episode discusses the importance of adopting a mindset that embraces change and accepts reality. It highlights the shift from a homeostatic approach to change to an allostatic approach, where change is seen as inevitable and constant. The key idea is to have the right expectations and continuously update them to align with reality. The episode emphasizes the importance of accepting change rather than resisting it, and finding ways to be flexible and adaptable in the face of uncertainty.
Identity: Embracing Multiple Rooms of Identity
The podcast explores the concept of having a rugged and flexible identity. It suggests that individuals should conceive of themselves as having multiple rooms to their identity, allowing them to explore different aspects of themselves and pursue mastery in various areas. The episode emphasizes the idea of a non-dual identity, where individuals can embrace both their immediate self and their ultimate self, connecting with the world and understanding their place in it. It encourages individuals to maintain a balance between exploration and stability in shaping their identity.
From global disruptions to individual life changes, transformation—both good and bad—is happening constantly.
Here to offer us a path for embracing life’s inherent instability is Brad Stulberg—a sustainable excellence expert, human performance coach, and bestselling author returning for his fourth appearance on the pod.
Today we talk about how to embrace transformation, cultivate resilience, and adapt to an ever-changing world. We also explore rugged flexibility, tragic optimism, adopting a flexible identity over time, how to navigate big life changes successfully, the perils of biohacking, and many other fascinating topics.
Amidst the chaos and confusion of self-help, I find Brad to be a principled voice of reason. This conversation is overflowing with evidence-based, practical, and actionable life counsel.
My hope is that some of the tactics shared help you not only navigate difficult circumstances but help facilitate the emergence of meaning and growth.
