354: Everything in Life Is A Negotiation. With Chris Voss.
Oct 5, 2022
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Chris Voss, a former FBI hostage negotiator and author of "Never Split The Difference," shares his journey from a small-town upbringing to a global negotiation expert. He discusses the evolution of negotiation techniques, emphasizing the importance of emotional intelligence and tactical empathy. Voss reveals how understanding emotions can transform high-stakes negotiations, and he highlights the significance of the word 'no' in building trust. He also introduces the Black Swan theory, illustrating how unexpected insights can shift negotiation dynamics.
Systematic four-step negotiation process includes setting target prices and utilizing empathy to elicit counteroffers.
Deep dives
Transition to Negotiation
Transitioning from being a member of the SWAT team and working on surveillance, the speaker developed an interest in hostage negotiation. This transition was motivated by a desire to remain involved in high-stakes decision-making situations, recognizing the unique skills required for negotiation scenarios.
Negotiation Training
After expressing interest in becoming a hostage negotiator within the FBI, the speaker attended negotiation training at Quantico. The training focused on turning participants into effective negotiators, emphasizing the importance of communication and strategic thinking in managing crisis situations.
Suicide Hotline Experience
Prior to formal negotiation training, the speaker volunteered on a suicide hotline, gaining practical experience in handling intense and emotional conversations. This experience provided valuable insights into effective communication strategies and helped develop skills in dealing with high-pressure situations.
Development of Negotiation Skills
Through dedicated training and practical experiences, the speaker honed their negotiation skills, preparing them to handle critical situations as a hostage negotiator. This development showcased a progression from initial interest to acquiring the necessary skills and expertise in crisis communication and conflict resolution.
Deactivating Negatives Through Labeling
By labeling and acknowledging the negatives or barriers in a negotiation, the speaker demonstrated the power of deactivating these obstacles. An example illustrated through a negotiation between Bob Iger and Steve Jobs showed how Jobs listed all the reasons not to make a deal, effectively removing these barriers and leaving space for positive considerations.
Building Empathy with Clear Understanding
Empathy is described as understanding and acknowledging the other person's situation without requiring agreement. The ability to empathize allows one to connect and convey that they are listening, leading to a more productive interaction. The emphasis is on creating empathetic relationships by encouraging a counterpart to elaborate on their situation, fostering healthy communication.
Transitioning Negatives to Positives Through Clear Discussion
Transitioning from focusing on negatives to exploring positives is highlighted as a critical negotiation strategy. The importance of addressing and discussing barriers or negative influences to clear the path for agreement is emphasized. This approach includes letting the negatives be voiced and resolved before moving towards considering the positive aspects, enabling decision-making by reconciling barriers and shifting to the positive outcomes.
Understanding the Power of Revealing Negatives
Acknowledging and addressing negative aspects, even when uncomfortable, plays a crucial role in dealing with them effectively. By bringing such issues to light, individuals can begin to process and manage them, leading to improved well-being and enhanced decision-making.
Benefit of Labeling Fears in Negotiations
In negotiations, addressing counterpart fears is highlighted for diffusing tension and promoting a sense of safety and trust. By recognizing and communicating concerns openly, negotiation dynamics can shift positively, fostering an environment conducive to constructive dialogue and mutual understanding.
Importance of Starting with 'No' in Negotiations
Embracing the concept of starting with 'no' in negotiations can lead to transformative outcomes. By giving counterparts the freedom to express disagreement or set boundaries, negotiators can navigate discussions more effectively, paving the way for constructive deal-making and enhanced decision-making processes.
Negotiation Strategies and the Black Swan Concept
Negotiation strategies were discussed, highlighting a systematic four-step process for effective bargaining. The process involves setting target prices, offering in decreasing increments, and utilizing empathy to elicit counteroffers. The importance of precise non-round numbers was emphasized for credibility. Additionally, the concept of the black swan in negotiation was explored, highlighting the idea of unknown unknowns that can be game-changing during negotiations.
Listening Importance in Negotiation and Tactical Insights
The significance of active listening in negotiations was underscored through an example involving preventing a potential threat. Multiple listeners allowed for varied insights, leading to leveraging the counterpart's background for strategic advantage. The podcast delved into tactics such as overestimating arrival times and exploiting common ground, emphasizing the value of intuitive negotiation tactics and enhancing situational awareness.
