The 4 Principles of Real Self Care with Dr. Pooja Lakshmin
Jan 9, 2024
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Dr. Pooja Lakshmin, a board-certified psychiatrist and author of "Real Self-Care," discusses the pitfalls of the wellness industry's commodified self-care. She shares her journey towards authentic self-care, outlining four crucial principles: boundaries, compassion, values, and power. Pooja emphasizes setting healthy boundaries and navigating societal pressures that complicate self-care. The conversation also touches on the intersection between self-care and activism, encouraging listeners to embrace their values and foster genuine practices for personal and social change.
Real self-care is focused on personal reflection, understanding values, and making choices aligned with those values.
Boundaries are crucial for self-care, allowing individuals to protect their time and energy and make intentional decisions.
Self-care involves a dialectic approach to balancing individual and systemic change, recognizing the limitations of individual agency and the need for broader changes.
Deep dives
Differentiating between real self-care and faux self-care
Real self-care is an internal process focusing on boundaries, compassion, values, and power. It is not about the external commercialized aspects, such as crystals or bubble baths, that the wellness industry often promotes as self-care. Faux self-care is the superficial external practices that distract from addressing the underlying issues. Real self-care involves personal reflection, understanding one's true values, setting boundaries, and making choices that align with those values.
The importance of boundaries in real self-care
Boundaries are a crucial aspect of real self-care because they allow individuals to create space for themselves and decide how to allocate their time and energy. Boundaries are not just about saying no, but also about pausing, reflecting, and responding consciously to commitments or requests. They provide an opportunity to evaluate what truly aligns with personal values and what may be externally imposed expectations. Developing and maintaining boundaries is an ongoing process and requires recognizing the agency one has in deciding how to prioritize and allocate their resources.
Navigating the interplay between individual change and systemic change
Real self-care involves a dialectic approach to balancing individual change and systemic change. While individual choices and actions are essential for personal well-being and alignment with values, systemic changes are necessary to address broader socioeconomic and cultural issues. External factors often place pressure and expectations on individuals, contributing to guilt and the sense of not doing enough. Recognizing both the limitations of individual agency and the need for systemic changes helps in navigating the complex interplay between personal growth and collective transformation.
The Importance of Setting Boundaries for Self-Care
Setting boundaries is a crucial aspect of self-care, as it allows individuals to protect their time and energy. By pausing and reflecting on the things that truly matter, individuals can make intentional decisions about how to prioritize their commitments and avoid overextending themselves. Boundaries can exist both on a micro and macro level, from responding to emails to making major life choices. Taking the time to establish boundaries helps individuals align their actions with their values and prevent burnout.
The Power of Naming and Digesting Good Experiences
Gratitude is not simply about counting blessings, but rather about fully experiencing and incorporating the positive moments in life. The idea of digesting good experiences involves being present and aware of what one has, and allowing oneself to fully appreciate it. By making meaning and connecting to the value and significance of certain experiences, individuals can cultivate a deeper sense of fulfillment and contentment. Additionally, understanding and reflecting on personal values is essential, as it provides a framework for decision-making and helps individuals align their actions with what truly matters to them.
Dr. Pooja Lakshmin, a psychiatrist, shares her journey of discovering the true essence of self-care. Drawing from her experiences with patients feeling overwhelmed by the wellness industry’s commodified approach, she unravels the concept of “faux self-care.” Pooja articulates the four principles of real self-care and the ever-changing nature of this internal process.
In this episode, you will be able to:
Define and discover the transformative power of real self-care
Learn to set healthy boundaries for genuine self-care
Overcome the societal challenges to prioritize your self-care
Explore the intersection of self-care and activism for personal and social change
Embrace the importance of values in nurturing authentic self-care practices
