Pillow Talks

Discover the transformative power of foreplay and why it's essential, not optional. Uncover the five common mistakes couples make and how to enhance intimacy and pleasure. The hosts break down misconceptions that make foreplay a rushed afterthought, emphasizing communication and mutual enjoyment. Learn techniques that make foreplay fun and spontaneous again, shifting your mindset around sex. This enlightening discussion encourages you to embrace intimacy at your own pace, leading to more satisfying experiences.

Dive into the intriguing world of anal play! The hosts tackle common misconceptions and explore why many feel both curious and intimidated. They share insights on safety, hygiene, and the evolving acceptance of butt stuff among straight men. Listeners get practical advice on preparation and communication, while also reflecting on body hair preferences and the distinctions between vaginal and anal intercourse. With humor and expert insight, this discussion is not just for the curious—it's a celebration of intimacy and open-minded exploration!

This episode tackles real listener dilemmas about intimacy and desire after major life changes, like having kids. It highlights the struggle between craving connection yet feeling 'meh' about sex. The hosts provide practical advice on handling performance anxiety and explore the complexities of never having an orgasm. With tips on enhancing personal pleasure and rekindling intimacy, they encourage open conversations to foster deeper bonds. Discover how understanding different desires can transform your sex life!

Dive into the relatable world of bladder health struggles, where personal stories spark open discussions about intimacy and anxiety. Discover surprising insights from pelvic floor therapy and the truth behind common yet harmful habits. Hear about a wild visit to the urologist that’s both shocking and humorous. Learn how one host trained her bladder like a dog, and uncover practical tips for better sleep and managing urges. This is a light-hearted yet eye-opening take on a topic many shy away from but deserve to explore.

Is it cheating if you go to sex club… but just to watch?What about a flirty Snapchat streak with your ex?A prostate massage with no orgasm? 👀This week, we’re back with Part 2 of one of our most talked-about episodes. We asked our community to share the moments, confessions, and curveballs that made them ask, “Wait…is this cheating?”And let’s just say… the gray areas are graying HARD.Here’s what we’re dishing on in this episode: Is emotional intimacy outside your relationship OK? When fantasies, DMs, or even Reddit lurking crosses the line. Are AI-generated nudes of your partner’s family the point of no return? Why intention and secrecy matter more than the act itself. The emotional toll “nothing happened” takes on a relationship. The difference between curiosity and disrespect when exploring sexually. No matter how you define cheating, one thing’s clear: these kinds of conversations are hard, and they don’t get easier without the right tools.Join the Deeper membershipWant hotter sex, deeper convos, and fewer fights? For less than the cost of a date night, get on-demand access to our expert-led courses, live sessions with us, and interactive tools designed to fit into your busy life.Start your journey inside Deeper here.Links & Resources🔥 The Art Of Initiation 🤖 Meet Vanessa AI (included with Deeper membership) Stay Connected📩 Join our email list — vmtherapy.com/subscribe📲 Follow us on Instagram — @vanessaandxander for behind-the-scenes fun, Q&As, and more tips on love and intimacy.🎧 Subscribe & Review — New episodes drop every Thursday! Don’t forget to subscribe and leave us a review — it helps us keep creating content you love.=================================THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS=================================👏Thanks Dipsea. Right now, listeners of this show can get a 30-day free trial ➡︎ https://dipseastories.com/pillow👏Thanks Hungryroot. Get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life ➡︎ https://hungryroot.com/pillow👏Thanks Cozy Earth. Get an exclusive discount for up to 40% off ➡︎ https://cozyearth.com/pillowtalks Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Explore the thin line between defensiveness and self-defense in relationships. Listeners share relatable stories, from parenting challenges to minor household disputes, shedding light on misunderstandings. Discover practical tips for fostering empathy and clear communication, helping break the cycle of reacting defensively. Learn how to validate your partner's feelings without always agreeing. Plus, gain insights into enhancing emotional awareness and accountability to nurture deeper connections.

Dive into a riveting couples coaching session where a real couple tackles their intimate challenges head-on. They explore the complexities of mismatched sexual desires and the pressures of balancing work and family life. Communication barriers are examined, highlighting how to foster connection despite stress. Discover practical tips for breaking out of relationship ruts and enhancing intimacy with achievable steps. Tune in for this enlightening discussion and a special surprise announcement that wraps up their journey!

🎉 We made it to 200 episodes! 🎉It’s wild to think about how far this podcast has come. There’s one thing we know for sure… we couldn’t have come this far without YOU. That’s why for this very special episode, we decided to celebrate by letting you ask us……absolutely ANYTHING.And you didn’t disappoint.From personal confessions to relationship deep dives to behind-the-scenes business secrets, no topic was off-limits.Tune in for an unfiltered, hilarious, and heartfelt conversation where we tackle:💬 Personal Qs – Would Vanessa ever let Xander shave his beard?❤️ Relationship Qs – Are we still in couples therapy?💼 Business Qs – Have we ever recorded a podcast while totally annoyed with each other?And SO much more! Stick around to the end because we’re teasing something big we’ve been working on behind the scenes… you’re going to want to be on our email list for this one. 👀Links & Resources:🔑 Take The Intimacy Quiz: Your Key To Love That Lasts – Find out exactly what your relationship needs most right now and get personalized guidance to start making real changes today! 👉 https://vmtherapy.com/5keys🏆 March Matchups: The Ultimate Bedroom Bracket – Cast your votes as we put 8 bedroom positions head-to-head, and help us pick the winning position for a brand-new free step-by-step guide! Follow along on Instagram @vanessaandxander and make sure you’re on our email list to get the final results!Stay Connected:📩 Join our email list – Be the first to know about exclusive offers, new products, and exciting updates: https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe📲 Follow us on Instagram – @vanessaandxander for behind-the-scenes fun, Q&As, and more tips on love and intimacy.🎧 Subscribe & Review – New episodes drop every Thursday! Don’t forget to subscribe and leave us a review — it helps us keep creating content you love.==========================THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ==========================👏 Thanks ZocDoc. Download the ZocDoc app to sign-up for FREE and book a top-rated doctor. ➡︎ https://zocdoc.com/pillow👏 Thanks Cure. Get 20% off your first order. Stay hydrated and feel your best! ➡︎ https://curehydration.com/PILLOW👏 Thanks Dipsea. Get a 30 day free trial ➡︎ https://dipseastories.com/pillow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We’re back with a fan-favorite series—Am I The Asshole? 🎉 You know we love diving into the wildest relationship dilemmas, and today’s lineup is extra spicy. We’re tackling situations that might hit way too close to home, like: 🚨 Masturbating - do you have to tell your partner every time? 🚨 Journaling about a past relationship—cheating or harmless? 🚨 Going through a partner’s phone (they found what?? 👀) 🚨 A partner picking up an annoying new voice… and refusing to drop it Sounds messy, right? We’re breaking it ALL down, sharing our takes on who’s the asshole, and of course—we want to hear yours too! Get ready to laugh, cringe, and maybe rethink your own opinions on these situations! 🎧 Want More AITA? If you love these episodes, don’t miss our past Am I The Asshole? deep dives: 🎧 EP 187, EP 155, EP 135, EP 125 📲 Stay Connected with Us! 💌 Join our email list for exclusive BTS + first access to everything we create 📸 Follow us on Instagram and tell us—who do YOU think is the asshole in these stories? 🎥 Subscribe on YouTube to watch this episode & more 💖 Links & Resources – Take Your Intimacy to the Next Level 💋 Give your partner the best foreplay they’ve ever had! → Ultimate Foreplay Guides Transform your sex life with expert-backed techniques designed to maximize pleasure for both of you. 📖 Want to talk about sex in a way that actually works? → Sex Talks: The NYT Best-Selling Book Discover the 5 key conversations that will unlock deeper connection, better communication, and hotter intimacy in your relationship. Which one are you diving into first? Let us know! 💬 ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏 Thanks OneSkin. Get started today with 15% off using code **PILLOW** ➡︎ https://oneskin.co. 👏 Thanks Hungryroot. Get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life ➡︎ https://hungryroot.com/pillow 👏 Thanks Blissy. Get better sleep, hair, and skin with Blissy. Get an additional 30% off ➡︎ https://blissy.com/PILLOWPOD. 👏 Thanks Beam. Get up to 40% off for a limited time when you go to ➡︎ https://shopbeam.com/PILLOW. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Initiating sex should be exciting, yet many couples struggle with it. Common issues include one partner always taking the lead and awkward, lazy attempts to connect. The need for proper timing and clear communication is emphasized to enhance intimacy. The podcast discusses overcoming societal expectations and personal challenges, including menopause. It offers creative strategies to make initiation more inviting and enjoyable, while emphasizing mutual respect and understanding each other's boundaries in relationships.