361 How To Overcome Procrastination, Self-Sabotage, and Break Negative Patterns

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Feb 6, 2025

Cece Sykes, a psychotherapist with over 40 years of experience and an expert in Internal Family Systems therapy, joins the conversation to tackle procrastination and self-sabotage. They discuss the challenges of internal resistance and the evolution of therapeutic approaches. Cece shares practical insights on navigating negative patterns and embracing vulnerability. Listeners learn about the significance of internal dialogue, self-compassion, and making small changes for personal growth. It's a transformative journey toward self-awareness and healing.

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ANECDOTE

Arlena's Struggle with Negative Patterns

Arlena, sober for 30 years, struggles with repeating negative patterns.
She consumes self-help information but finds herself procrastinating on self-care and under-earning.

INSIGHT

IFS Model: Managers, Firefighters, and Exiles

Cece Sykes explains the IFS model categorizes parts as managers, firefighters, and exiles.
Managers focus on tasks and growth, firefighters on shifting gears and soothing, and exiles hold vulnerability.

ADVICE

Breaking Through Polarization

Arlena and Cece discuss the knowledge-action gap and how polarization hinders action.
They suggest using a demo to resolve internal resistance using IFS.

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Hey Friend,

Thank you for downloading this episode! Its going to be a little bit different that what I normally do, but I think youll get a lot out of it.

Like so many of us in recovery, I have felt really frustrated at times with my own negative repeating patterns. Procrastinating on self-care, spending too much time consuming information instead of acting on it, and at times, feeling really disappointed in myself.

Its a really frustrating experience to recognize when Im feeling stuck and powerless to change, especially when I have tried just about every form of therapy, and read hundreds of books over the last 3 decades.

But over the last couple of years, I have been practicing parts work, specifically polarized parts. An example of this is where I have an ambitious part of me that wants to get stuff done, but also a distractor part that causes me to get overwhelmed and feel paralyzed.

It has been through this parts work that I have been able to resolve this polarization and resistance, to be more productive in the last 12 months than I have in YEARS. I have written a book, been consistent in the gym, my self-care practices, and created a new program that Ill share with you in a moment.

In todays episode, I invited Cece Sykes to join me on the podcast to do a demonstration of this parts work. Cece has been working with the founder of IFS for the last 20 years and I consider her to be the leading expert on polarization.

I believe in this work so much, that its the foundation of The Inner Compass Program, which opens for enrollment on 2/16. The focus of the course will be to use parts work to resolve internal resistance so that we can actually take action on the knowledge we have and prioritize our most important goals. If you have been searching for the missing piece, and feeling like you need something more, then Id like to invite you to join me in this new community. Just visit Innercompassprogram.com/waitlist and youll be the first one in line when enrollment opens.

So without further delay, please enjoy this episode with Cece Sykes.