The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}

This episode originally aired February 17th, 2023I’ve been listening for a while and the watchdog and possum brain ideas have really helped me. Is it OK to teach this to my kids too? I’m worried they’ll start using it as excuses.I get this question all the time! If we teach our kids about the watchdog and possum brain are they going to start saying things like “My watchdog brain made me hit my sister!”In this episode, I:Outline the benefits of teaching our kids about their brain (there are lots)Teach you what to do if your child uses it as an excuseRecommend resources for how to teach your child about their brainWelcome to Fridays in February Q&As!  I'll be answering one question every Friday in February.Additional Resources:Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior Podcast: https://robyngobbel.com/changebehaviorFocus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior FREE Webinar: https://robyngobbel.com/webinarThe START HERE podcast: https://robyngobbel.com/starthereOver on my website you can find:Masterclass and eBook on What Behavior Really Is (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: Being With:::Buy Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBookJoin The Club (or get on the waiting list!) over at RobynGobbel.com/TheClubHop on the waiting list for Being With- an immersive professional training program exploring the neurobiology of big, baffling behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BeingWith

Does your child with a vulnerable nervous system say mean, hurtful, taunting, or aggressive things to your other kids? You already know you can’t control what comes out of someone else’s mouth, so what do you do??? How do you help your kids deal with their sibling’s verbal aggression?In this episode, you’ll learnSteps to help increase your children’s psychological boundariesActivities that will help your children increase their psychological boundariesResources mentioned in this podcast:Setting Boundaries That Sick - Juliane Taylor Shore's book!Boundaries with Verbal Aggression with Juliane Taylor Shore {EP 115}Setting Boundaries That Stick With Juliane Taylor Shore and Therapist Uncensored {EP 185}Helping Siblings Understand "Unfair" Parenting {EP 186}Teach Siblings about Owls, Watchdogs, and Possums... Without Excusing! {EP 187}Grief as the Sibling of a Child with Special Needs {EP 188}Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/siblingsverbalaggressionFollow Me On:FacebookInstagramOver on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: Being WithCheck Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources :::Buy Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBookJoin The Club (or get on the waiting list!) over at RobynGobbel.com/TheClubHop on the waiting list for Being With- an immersive professional training program exploring the neurobiology of big, baffling behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BeingWith

What do you do when multiple kids are upset at the same time? Learn the top strategy for calming chaos while maintaining safety and emotional health. Discover how to prioritize what truly matters and set realistic expectations for yourself as a parent. Dive into the importance of self-compassion during overwhelming moments. Plus, explore helpful resources that provide insight into managing big behaviors and fostering connection.

If you are a regular listener here on The Baffling Behavior Show, big, baffling behaviors and big meltdowns are no longer surprising in your home.Even if we can’t predict those moments of 'Back-Off or, 'Attack' Watchdog, "Shut Down' or, 'Play Dead' Possum, we can predict that it is going to happen again.You can create felt safety for the other children in your home by making a plan.In this episode, you’ll learnKey things to consider when making a plan for what siblings should do during a meltdownScripts for how to talk to your other children about the plan How to empower siblings to get help when they recognize lower level cues and clues of the watchdog or possum pathway in their siblingResources mentioned in this podcast:Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior {EP 84}Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/helpsiblingsFollow Me On:FacebookInstagramOver on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: Being WithCheck Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources :::Buy Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBookJoin The Club (or get on the waiting list!) over at RobynGobbel.com/TheClubHop on the waiting list for Being With- an immersive professional training program exploring the neurobiology of big, baffling behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BeingWith

Grief often goes unnoticed in families with special needs. Siblings may feel isolated and unacknowledged, experiencing complex emotions that deserve validation. The discussion focuses on open communication within families and how literature can help navigate these emotional challenges. Parents learn essential questions to help their children cope, creating a supportive environment where all feelings are recognized. Discover how to nurture deeper connections and foster understanding in the midst of challenging dynamics.

One way we can support the siblings of kids with big, baffling behaviors is to teach them about owls, watchdogs, and possums (or some way to understand the brain and behaviors) as well as to teach them about nervous system vulnerabilities and ‘overactive’ watchdog and possum brains!In this episode, you’ll learnSteps to take when teaching siblings about owls, watchdogs, and possums so they won’t feel like you’re just excusing bad behaviorThe importance of validating your kids’ experience that the way you parent their sibling is unfairA couple scripts for talking to your children about their sibling’s watchdog and possum brain (available on my website by CLICKING HERE)Resources mentioned in this podcast:Helping Siblings Understand "Unfair" Parenting {EP 186}Can I Teach My Child About Their Brain? {EP 114}My Child Won't Talk About Their Watchdog and Possum Brain {EP 160}EVERYONE Has A Watchdog And Possum Brain! {EP 178}Is Understand Behavior Just Excusing It? {EP 109}Enabling Vrs. Low-Demand Parenting {EP 144}Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/teachsiblingsFollow Me On:FacebookInstagramOver on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: Being WithCheck Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources :::Buy Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBookJoin The Club (or get on the waiting list!) over at RobynGobbel.com/TheClubHop on the waiting list for Being With- an immersive professional training program exploring the neurobiology of big, baffling behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BeingWith

Do you have kids who feel like the way you parent their sibling (the one with the worst behavior!!!) is unfair?We’ll be tackling different topics on how to support siblings over the next month.In this episode, you’ll learnThe five things to consider when thinking about how to help siblings understand ‘unfair’ parentingAre you parenting all your kids thru the lens of regulation, connection, and felt safety?Do all your children know about owls, watchdogs, and possums (or some other way to understand the brain and conceptualize behaviors)Do your school-age and older child understand vulnerable nervous systems and sensitized stress response systems (overactive watchdog and possum brains)Do your children (siblings of kids with special needs) feel really, truly seen by you?Is this actually more about unresolved grief (yours and/or theirs)Resources mentioned in this podcast:Is Understanding Behavior Just Excusing It? {EP 109}Stress Response System {EP 94}What Does Vulnerable Nervous System Mean {122}Grief in Parenting Kids with a Vulnerable Nervous System {EP 129}Can I teach my kids about their brain? {EP 114}Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/unfairFollow Me On:FacebookInstagramOver on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: Being WithCheck Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources :::The All-About-Me workbook will help your child grow their owl brain and develop ways to calm their watchdog and possum brain. 24 page, full-color, instant download at RobynGobbel.com/store :::Buy Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBookJoin The Club (or get on the waiting list!) over at RobynGobbel.com/TheClubHop on the waiting list for Being With- an immersive professional training program exploring the neurobiology of big, baffling behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BeingWith

Something new and unexpected here on The Baffling Behavior Show!This episode is actually from the Therapist Uncensored Podcast with Sue Marriott and Ann Kelley. Sue and Ann interviewed one of y'alls FAVORITES- Juliane Taylor Shore.Juliane was on The Baffling Behavior Show a long time ago, talking about psychological boundaries and verbal aggression. This is one of my most played episodes EVER.Juliane just published a new book on boundaries so when Sue and Ann asked if I wanted to do a podcast feed swap, I knew y'all would LOVE to hear from Juliane.In this episode, you'll hear Sue and Ann interview Juliane all about Setting Boundaries that Stick. Resources mentioned in this podcast:Setting Boundaries that Stick by Juliane Taylor ShoreTherapist Uncensored Podcast with Sue Marriott and Ann KelleyBoundaries with Verbal Aggression podcast episode #115 with Juliane Taylor Shore Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/boundariesthatstickFollow Me On:FacebookInstagramOver on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: Being WithCheck Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources :::The All-About-Me workbook will help your child grow their owl brain and develop ways to calm their watchdog and possum brain. 24 page, full-color, instant download at RobynGobbel.com/store :::Buy Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBookJoin The Club (or get on the waiting list!) over at RobynGobbel.com/TheClubHop on the waiting list for Being With- an immersive professional training program exploring the neurobiology of big, baffling behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BeingWith

Parents of kids with baffling behaviors are CONSTANTLY being judged by others.How do we get to a point where we don’t care as much about what other people think?In this episode, we’ll explore:Some of the most common judgments that parents of kids with baffling behaviors receiveHow it’s actually not possible to not care at all, but we can care LESSThree things we can do so that the judgment from others doesn’t impact us as much as it does nowFor a script on how to set boundaries with folks expressing judgment, go to: https://RobynGobbel.com/notcareResources mentioned in this podcast:How Self-Compassion Changed Things For This Mom {EP 78}Influence Behaviors, Not Control {EP 101}Is Understanding Behavior Just Excusing It? {EP 109}Boundaries With Verbal Aggression With Juliane Taylor Shore {EP 115}Secure Relating With Guests Sue & Ann From Therapist Uncensored {EP 175}Juliane's Book! : Setting Boundaries That StickRead the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/notcareFollow Me On:FacebookInstagramOver on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: Being WithCheck Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources :::The All-About-Me workbook will help your child grow their owl brain and develop ways to calm their watchdog and possum brain. 24 page, full-color, instant download at RobynGobbel.com/store :::Buy Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBookJoin The Club (or get on the waiting list!) over at RobynGobbel.com/TheClubHop on the waiting list for Being With- an immersive professional training program exploring the neurobiology of big, baffling behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BeingWith

Discover the powerful connection between self-acceptance and behavioral change. Dive into personal stories intertwined with neuroscience, illustrating how embracing oneself leads to transformation. Explore the balance of acceptance and the desire for growth, and learn how mindfulness can enhance relationships. Gain insights on fostering trust and safety in parenting, essential for effectively addressing children's challenging behaviors. Experience empowerment through acceptance, making the change both possible and liberating.