The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}

Ep. 211: Hard? Too Hard? For PARENTS!!!

Mar 4, 2025

Explore the nuances of intensive parenting and uncover the difference between 'hard' and 'too hard' for both parents and kids. Delve into the emotional toll on parents and learn strategies for offering support while establishing vital boundaries. Gain insights into fostering children's success in educational settings through co-regulation and understanding their needs. Discover the importance of self-compassion and connection in parenting, especially when navigating the challenges of parenting sensitive children.

30:24

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Episode notes

Podcast summary created with Snipd AI

Quick takeaways

Parents must assess their own limits by differentiating between tasks that are hard and those that are too hard to manage effectively.

Recognizing personal needs and adjusting expectations simultaneously fosters healthier dynamics between parents and children for better co-regulation.

Deep dives

Understanding Baffling Behaviors

Managing a child's baffling behaviors can be challenging, especially when the child lacks a history of trauma. This approach is applicable to all children with vulnerable nervous systems, focusing on the differentiation between what is hard and what is too hard. The concept of hard versus too hard helps parents assess their expectations and the stress their children can handle, allowing for strategic adjustments to demands and support. This acknowledgment can guide both parents and children in navigating daily challenges more effectively.

Intro

2min

Navigating the Challenges of Intensive Parenting

8min

Understanding Child Success in Educational Settings

3min

Finding Balance: Compassion and Connection in Parenting

15min

We talk a lot about hard very too hard for your kids (thanks Amanda Diekman for that hard vs. too hard language!).

But have you considered applying that concept to yourself?

This is intensive parenting! Far beyond when parenting is supposed to get less intensive, you’re still giving super-hero level scaffolding, supervision and co-regulation - and it’s a LOT!

In this episode, you’ll learn

How to assess for when it’s just TOO hard- for YOU!
The importance of making an owl-brain decision about things being too hard (or not)
Ways to increase support at the same time as you lower demands for yourself

Resources mentioned in this podcast:

Enabling vs. Low-Demand podcast
Amanda Diekman - Low Demand Parenting on Instagram

Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/toohard

Follow Me On:

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Over on my website you can find:

Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)

eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)

LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources

Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club

Year Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: Being With

The Club is welcoming new members now until Friday!

Head to RobynGobbel.com/TheClub for details and to join us!

:::

Buy Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBook

Join The Club (or get on the waiting list!) over at RobynGobbel.com/TheClub

Hop on the waiting list for Being With- an immersive professional training program exploring the neurobiology of big, baffling behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BeingWith

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