Elevator Systems - Bowen Family Systems Theory

Priscilla Friesen, a seasoned family consultant and Bowen theory expert, shares her insights on navigating death through a family systems lens. She discusses how the dynamics of grief shift family roles and highlight the importance of open relationships in managing loss. Her perspective on emotional flexibility during grief encourages families to focus on practical solutions rather than solely on feelings. Additionally, Priscilla elaborates on how generational patterns of anxiety and loss can ripple through family systems, influencing behaviors and relationships.

Selden Dunbar Illick, a longtime scholar of Bowen family systems theory and founder of the Princeton Family Center for Education, shares her insights on aging. She discusses how emotional connections influence aging and the balance of support within families. Illick explores concepts like emotional cutoff and differentiation, illustrating them through personal and cultural examples. She emphasizes the importance of lifelong learning and engaging in open conversations about end-of-life preferences, advocating for intergenerational connection to improve family dynamics.

Lisa Moss, a licensed clinical social worker and faculty at the Center for Family Consultation, dives into family rifts through the lens of Bowen family systems theory. She discusses the concept of 'cutoff', explaining how it can relieve tension but may have lasting effects on relationships. The conversation explores the emotional cost of maintaining distance and the impact of unchecked family dynamics. Lisa also highlights the importance of self-differentiation and managing one’s emotional energy within family contexts, offering TV show examples that illustrate these concepts.

Kathleen Kerr, a clinical nurse specialist and Bowen Theory expert, delves into the complexities of retirement as a systems event rather than just an individual transition. She shares insights on the impact of family history and societal trends on retirement expectations. The discussion also touches on common assumptions between spouses, the importance of differentiation of self, and leadership succession in families and organizations, illustrated through examples from the TV show 'Succession'. Kathleen encourages thoughtful planning to navigate these significant changes.

Welcome to Elevator Systems! Today Amie Post joins Dixie Vandersluys and Katie White to talk about grandparenting from a Bowen family systems theory lens. Amie is the keynote speaker at Living Systems’ conference, Aging: Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity on October 17th and 18th. Details below.Amie Post, is a marriage and family therapist with extensive experience in leadership. She serves as the Executive Director of the Center for Family Systems Theory of Western New York and previously held the role of Executive Director at the Family Crisis Center of Baltimore County. A dedicated student of Bowen Theory since 2001, Amie is a faculty member and board director at the Bowen Center in Washington, DC. She is also a wife, mother, and grandmother.What You’ll Learn in This Episode:The basic invitation of growing yourself up and being thoughtful about how to participate in family relationships with intentionality.The significance of observing multi-generational patterns and how they influence family relationships. How generational anxiety affects current family dynamics.Recognizing automatic expectations of grandparenting roles, doing “differently” than previous generations, and the usefulness of the "beliefs paper" exercise.The role of grandparents in providing wisdom and support without overstepping boundaries.The importance of meaningful relationships across generations and the resource of the family.Examples include: the movies Minari and Moana, childcare, family vacations, the various ways grandparents show up, and “treats at grandma’s house” with a personal example.This episode is not only for grandparents, but for adult children navigating parenting, grandparenting, and grandchildren, as well as clinicians working with families. Terms you don’t understand? We have episodes on all 8 concepts of Bowen theory and other ideas in Elevator Systems Seasons 1 & 2.Recommended Resources:The Murray Bowen Archives Project Dr. Murray Bowen: Family Therapy in Clinical PracticeDr. Jenny Brown: Growing Yourself UpRoberta M. Gilbert, M.D.: Connecting with Our ChildrenVictoria Harrison: The Belief Paper Assignment, Family Systems Forum, Fall 2022, Vol 24, No. 3Living Systems Conference: Aging - Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?New podcast episodes released every Tuesday this season—stay tuned as we explore relationships across the lifespan! Subscribe on YouTube, Spotify, or Apple Podcasts so you don’t miss a weekly release.Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and comment.Living Systems Counselling and Training provides educational material for those interested in learning more about Bowen family systems theory: https://livingsystems.caLiving Systems Hybrid Conference: October 17–18, 2025Conference theme: Aging—Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?Learn more: https://livingsystems.ca/education/conferences/fall-2025-conference-on-aging/Key Topics:#BowenFamilySystems #LivingSystems #MurrayBowen #Therapy #SystemsThinking #Family #Grandparenting #Grandparents #Grandchildren #Expectations Resources #Transitions #Goals #Generations #GenerationalPatterns #Anxiety #Aging #Parenting #Boundaries #MentalHealth #Relationships #TherapyPodcast #DifferentiationOfSelf #Differentiation #BowenTheory #ElevatorSystems #FamilySystemsTheory #ElevatorSystemsPodcast #MurrayBowenArchives #TMBAP #TheMurrayBowenArchivesProjectDISCLAIMER: This podcast is general information about Bowen family systems theory and is not considered the practice of counselling or therapy.  The information presented are the views of the people who say them. Any information used from this podcast is used at your own risk.

Join John Bell, an ordained United Methodist pastor with 30 years of experience applying Bowen family systems theory, as he delves into the complexities of the empty nest stage. He discusses how relationships evolve as children gain independence and how transitions like divorce or retirement can reshape family dynamics. John emphasizes open communication, explores the 'family cellular plan' for promoting adult children's independence, and offers insights on redefining spousal connections and managing assumptions in this new phase of life.

Join Erik Thompson, a licensed leadership psychologist and founder of Thompson Leadership Development, as he dives deep into the art of launching adult children. He discusses how to prepare for this pivotal stage, balancing connection with independence. Erik highlights the pitfalls of over-helping and the complexities of family dynamics during launches. Cultural variations in parenting postures are explored, shedding light on how personal family histories influence these transitions. Packed with anecdotes and insights, this conversation is a treasure for parents and professionals alike.

Kathleen Cotter Cauley, a licensed marriage and family therapist and faculty member at the Bowen Center, shares her insights on navigating blended families. She emphasizes the importance of lower anxiety and self-differentiation in managing these complex dynamics. Kathleen discusses family diagrams to visualize relationships and promotes curiosity about each family member's experiences. Drawing on personal anecdotes and cultural references like 'Stepmom' and 'The Brady Bunch,' she highlights how realistic expectations and honest conversations can strengthen blended family bonds.

Dr. Carrie Collier, a seasoned researcher and therapist specializing in Bowen Family Systems Theory, joins hosts Dixie Vandersluys and Katie White to explore the complexities of divorce. They discuss the importance of understanding family history and patterns during marital changes. Dr. Collier highlights how emotional fusion in a marriage can reflect separation intensity and emphasizes personal growth opportunities that arise during divorce. The conversation includes practical advice on utilizing coaches and maintaining communication to support family dynamics.

Devana Weiss, a licensed counselor and clinical supervisor with nearly two decades of experience in Bowen family systems theory, joins the hosts to discuss parenting children with challenges. She highlights the significant impact of parental worry on children and the necessity of maintaining clarity amidst struggles. The conversation includes insights on family dynamics, using analogies like gardening and references from the film 'CODA.' Devana also explores the nuances of selective eating and the collaborative roles of family and professionals in fostering supportive environments.