Polycurious

In this episode, we explore what it looks like to navigate three Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell relationships in which all partners want escalation, while Skyler is not ready to step onto the relationship escalator with any of them. This tension is especially present for Alex, who is in her mid-thirties and thinking seriously about partnership, stability, and having children. Skyler shares how he moved from a long-term monogamous marriage into non-hierarchy and unexpectedly found himself in three relationships, while Alex reflects on meeting Skyler shortly before her divorce and falling in love while still grieving. Together, we unpack when Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell dynamics can feel protective versus when they can become harmful and how non-hierarchy can create tension when people’s futures are uncertain.Join my Patreon ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.patreon.com/c/PolycuriousGet my free guide to opening up ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.polycurious.com/guide-to-opening-upBook a free exploratory call with me⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://calendly.com/fernandafabian/30minJoin our Whatsapp community⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:⁠⁠⁠⁠https://chat.whatsapp.com/CIo9i8FTioT0ebfU3QmNqVFollow Polycurious on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.instagram.com/polycuriouspodcast?igshid=1mrwl69kdbtasFollow Polycurious on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.tiktok.com/@polycuriousWatch the podcast on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@polycuriouspodcast

Today, Jesse opens up about two challenging breakups that unfolded in the context of non-monogamy, how those endings impacted his reputation within his community, and how they shaped the way he saw himself. He also shares how later, healthier relationships helped him rewrite those old narratives. We talk about why we’re often drawn to people who aren’t actually a good fit for partnership, why even “bad” relationships can be valuable for the growth they spark, and how those experiences ultimately help us get clearer about what we want and lead us toward more grounded, nourishing connections.Bonus Patreon Content with Jesse:Being a Male Unicorn:https://www.patreon.com/posts/bonus-ep-67-male-145030257Breaking Up for The Right Reasons:https://www.patreon.com/posts/bonus-ep-67-up-145030787Get my free guide to opening up ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.polycurious.com/guide-to-opening-upBook a free exploratory call with me⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://calendly.com/fernandafabian/30minJoin my Patreon ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.patreon.com/c/PolycuriousJoin our Whatsapp community⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:⁠⁠⁠⁠https://chat.whatsapp.com/CIo9i8FTioT0ebfU3QmNqVFollow Polycurious on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.instagram.com/polycuriouspodcast?igshid=1mrwl69kdbtasFollow Polycurious on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.tiktok.com/@polycuriousWatch Polycurious on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@polycuriouspodcast

In this episode, I finally sit on the other side of the mic. I’m interviewed by my friend A (who you might remember from the episode with her husband J).We talk about my upbringing, what I learned about my sexuality (including discovering masturbation much later in life), my journey with Seth as my primary partner and eventually finding a second partner, what it was like to navigate conflict with two partners, and why I’ve become such a big believer in not future-tripping and instead listening to your intuition in the moment.Join my Patreon ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.patreon.com/c/PolycuriousBreakup episodes 1 + 2:https://www.patreon.com/c/PolycuriousFer + Seth’s episode 12:⁠https://www.polycurious.com/podcast/ep12⁠Fer + Seth episode 48:⁠https://www.polycurious.com/podcast/ep48⁠John Part 1 (Patreon):https://www.patreon.com/posts/meet-my-partner-138151166John Part 2:⁠https://www.polycurious.com/podcast/ep61⁠Get my free guide to opening up ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.polycurious.com/guide-to-opening-upBook a free exploratory call with me⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://calendly.com/fernandafabian/30minJoin our Whatsapp community⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:⁠⁠⁠https://chat.whatsapp.com/CIo9i8FTioT0ebfU3QmNqVFollow Polycurious on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.instagram.com/polycuriouspodcast?igshid=1mrwl69kdbtasFollow Polycurious on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.tiktok.com/@polycuriousWatch the podcast on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@polycuriouspodcast

In the second part of my conversation with A and J, we talk about how J learned to face and work through his insecurities instead of letting them dictate how A connects with others. We also explore how differently they’ve each approached non-monogamy, with A actively dating while J has taken things more slowly as he continues to unpack his religious upbringing and lifelong monogamous conditioning.Join our Patreon ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.patreon.com/c/PolycuriousGet my free guide to opening up ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.polycurious.com/guide-to-opening-upBook a free exploratory call with me⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://calendly.com/fernandafabian/30minJoin our Whatsapp community⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:⁠⁠https://chat.whatsapp.com/CIo9i8FTioT0ebfU3QmNqVFollow Polycurious on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.instagram.com/polycuriouspodcast?igshid=1mrwl69kdbtasFollow Polycurious on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.tiktok.com/@polycuriousWatch the podcast on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@polycuriouspodcast

A and J discuss their journey of opening their long-term relationship after menopause sparked a newfound libido in A. They share how they transitioned from a rule-focused dynamic, initially driven by J's insecurities, to a rule-free approach. The conversation reveals the complexities of jealousy, enmeshment, and self-discovery as they navigate their experiences. J reflects on personal growth and the importance of communication, while A highlights the value of self-reflection and respect in their evolving bond.

Today, Evita Sawyers ((@Lavitaloca34) shares how she went from letting jealousy and anger take over to becoming more grounded and less reactive. We talk about her experience being in a triad and how opening her marriage revealed gaps in her relationship with her husband, ultimately leading to their breakup.This episode explores how non-monogamy can uncover powerful truths about yourself, serve as a path for personal growth, and highlight both the strengths and limitations within your relationships.Resourced mentioned:Follow Evita on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/lavitaloca34?igsh=a2RqOHU5ZTdoMmRiFollow Evita on Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/share/1Evne8bz9V/?mibextid=wwXIfrPatreon Bonus Content from This Conversation:https://www.patreon.com/c/PolycuriousPoly Love Documentary:https://www.amazon.com/gp/video/detail/B088G1RM9C/ref=atv_sr_fle_c_Tn74RA_1_1_1?sr=1-1&pageTypeIdSource=ASIN&pageTypeId=B088G3DKRG&qid=1759100808642The Untethered Soul Michael A Singer https://untetheredsoul.com/untethered-soulThe Power of Now by Eckhart Tollehttps://www.amazon.com/Power-Now-Guide-Spiritual-Enlightenment/dp/1577314808The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruizhttps://www.amazon.com/Four-Agreements-Practical-Personal-Freedom/dp/1878424319No Mud, No Lotus by Thich Nhat Hanhhttps://www.parallax.org/product/no-mud-no-lotus/Loving What Is By Byron Katie https://thework.com/loving-what-is-revised-edition/More Than Two:https://www.amazon.com/More-Than-Two-Practical-Polyamory/dp/0991399706The Ethical Slut:https://www.amazon.com/Ethical-Slut-Third-Practical-Relationships/dp/0399579664Nonviolent Communication:https://www.amazon.com/Nonviolent-Communication-Language-Life-Changing-Relationships/dp/189200528XThe Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown:https://brenebrown.com/book/the-gifts-of-imperfection/Get my free guide to opening up ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.polycurious.com/guide-to-opening-upBook a free exploratory call with me⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://calendly.com/fernandafabian/30minJoin our Whatsapp community⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://chat.whatsapp.com/CIo9i8FTioT0ebfU3QmNqVJoin our Patreon ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.patreon.com/c/PolycuriousFollow Polycurious on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.instagram.com/polycuriouspodcast?igshid=1mrwl69kdbtasFollow Polycurious on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.tiktok.com/@polycuriousWatch the podcast on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@polycuriouspodcast

Discover the complexities of maintaining a long-distance polyamorous relationship! Roshi and Frankie share their journey of balancing multiple partners while prioritizing their connection. They discuss managing jealousy, the importance of communication, and finding security even with a nesting partner. Learn how to identify needs, embrace differences, and experiment for growth. This candid conversation highlights the emotional work necessary for non-monogamy and the inner journey it inspires.

In a candid discussion, John shares how his casual dating past shaped his current relationship. They explore pivotal moments, like the 'fireplace incident,' highlighting the importance of accountability. Trust issues are unpacked as they navigate their contrasting dynamics, focusing on personal growth and emotional processing. John's advice? Embrace curiosity over judgment in relationships. Together, they stress the beauty of accepting partners as they are, fostering deeper connections sans labels.

Catherine and Brian went on Feeld looking for a threesome but things took a turn when Catherine fell for a woman who’s also married with a daughter. Now the two couples (and their kids) have formed a loving polycule built on honesty and care.In today’s episode, we talk about how Brian stays sensually connected to the dynamic by being submissive, even though he’s not sexually involved with Catherine’s girlfriend. We get into how they’ve navigated Catherine having threesomes with her girlfriend and her girlfriend’s husband. We also explore the importance of staying open to evolving dynamics, and why asking thoughtful questions can go further than quick reassurance when your partner is struggling in non-monogamy.Resources mentioned:Ep.46 More Than A Mother with Molly Roden WinterMore Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory (book)Sex with Emily podcastBonus content: Raising a child in a polycule:https://www.patreon.com/posts/133008939/Join our Patreon ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.patreon.com/c/PolycuriousGet my free guide to opening up ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:⁠https://www.polycurious.com/guide-to-opening-upBook a free exploratory call with me⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://calendly.com/fernandafabian/30minJoin our Whatsapp community⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://chat.whatsapp.com/CIo9i8FTioT0ebfU3QmNqVJoin our Patreon ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.patreon.com/c/PolycuriousFollow Polycurious on⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Threads⁠⁠

Adam is the author of Seek the Risk, the only memoir I know of by a man about non-monogamy. In this episode, he shares how being with a female partner who was more sexually active than he was challenged his sense of masculinity. He talks about how he overcame those feelings using techniques from his extreme sports background, including recognizing harmful inner narratives and reframing fear. Get Adam's Book "Seek the Risk"seektherisk.netWrite to Adam: adam@seektherisk.netRead Adam's Substack:seektherisk.substack.comJoin our Patreon ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.patreon.com/c/PolycuriousGet my free guide to opening up ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.polycurious.com/guide-to-opening-upBook a free exploratory call with me⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://calendly.com/fernandafabian/30minJoin our Whatsapp community⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://chat.whatsapp.com/CIo9i8FTioT0ebfU3QmNqVJoin our Patreon ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:https://www.patreon.com/c/PolycuriousFollow Polycurious on⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tik Tok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Threads⁠⁠