True You Podcast

In this episode, Marty and Bill talk about the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model and how it supports personal coaching. They share six prompts that help deepen connection in relationships, especially around unresolved feelings, honest communication, and rebuilding trust. The conversation focuses on staying grounded in reality to ease emotional pain and create more peace. They also share ways to grow, strengthen emotional capacity, and bring more closeness and understanding to relationships.Chapters:00:00 Introduction and Welcome00:20 Understanding IFS (Internal Family Systems)01:36 Coaching vs. Therapy03:27 Nonviolent Communication and Its Integration with IFS06:55 Addressing Criticisms and Misconceptions14:59 Creating Connection: Six Prompts for Relationship Building17:15 Personal Story: Road Trip Tensions31:13 Navigating Scary Conversations32:19 Building Trust and Honesty33:46 Addressing Unresolved Issues34:15 Making Requests and Setting Boundaries35:36 Expressing Gratitude and Love38:18 Planning and Coordination44:24 Commitments and Accountability49:22 Overcoming Resistance and Embracing ConnectionLinks and show notes:• True You Podcast Facebook Page - https://www.facebook.com/trueyoupodcast• If you would like to be a guest on the True You podcast, please complete this guest application. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdbHITeLbAD98TRhFPZzK2kStuHos5HFjOGBWAaTJjgVcEAGA/viewform• Internal Family Systems - https://ifs-institute.com/• Bill Tierney Coaching - https://www.billtierneycoaching.com/• Get the Compassionate Results Guidebook here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FHGJYHGV• ‘Listening is the Key', Dr. Kettelhut’s website - https://www.listeningisthekey.com/• Marty’s new book, ‘Leadership as Relation’ - https://amzn.to/3KKkCZO• Marty’s earlier book, ‘Listen… Till You Disappear’ - https://amzn.to/3XmoiZd• Parts Work Practice - Free IFS Practice Group Sessions - https://www.partsworkpractice.com• Contact Marty - mkettelhut@msn.com• Contact Bill - bill@billtierneycoaching.com

In this episode, Marty and Bill discuss Marty's ongoing book about the concept of beauty and seamlessly transition into an in-depth conversation about capacity and the concept of 'Self' within the internal family systems model. The discussion extends to personal anecdotes, including stories of overcoming trauma, the influence of childhood experiences, and practical steps to increase personal capacity. They explore the impacts of connection, meditation, integrity, and physical exercise on one’s capacity to handle life's daily challenges. Chapters:00:00 Introduction 00:22 Exploring the Concept of Beauty02:41 Today's Topic: Capacity and Self03:57 Understanding Capacity and Its Limits08:29 The Impact of Trauma on Capacity13:51 Managing and Increasing Capacity17:48 Real-Life Examples and Practical Tips20:34 The Theory of Capacity in Daily Life25:32 Struggles and Escaping Marriage26:14 The Comfort Inn and Feeling Freedom27:19 Depression and Seeking Help28:55 The Power of Running30:41 Increasing Capacity Through Connection33:36 Restoring Integrity39:01 Healing the Past with IFS48:53 Enlightenment and Capacity49:31 Wrapping Up and Future TopicsLinks and Show notes:• "Angel" Keanu Reeves movie “Good Fortune” - https://www.imdb.com/title/tt27543578/• True You Podcast Facebook Page - https://www.facebook.com/trueyoupodcast• If you would like to be a guest on the True You podcast, please complete this guest application. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdbHITeLbAD98TRhFPZzK2kStuHos5HFjOGBWAaTJjgVcEAGA/viewform• Internal Family Systems - https://ifs-institute.com/• Bill Tierney Coaching - https://www.billtierneycoaching.com/• Get the Compassionate Results Guidebook here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FHGJYHGV• ‘Listening is the Key', Dr. Kettelhut’s website - https://www.listeningisthekey.com/• Marty’s new book, ‘Leadership as Relation’ - https://amzn.to/3KKkCZO• Marty’s earlier book, ‘Listen… Till You Disappear’ - https://amzn.to/3XmoiZd• Parts Work Practice - Free IFS Practice Group Sessions - https://www.partsworkpractice.com• Contact Marty - mkettelhut@msn.com• Contact Bill - bill@billtierneycoaching.com

In this episode, Bill and Marty explore the intricate balance between taking action and practicing acceptance in various aspects of life. From business leadership and career transitions to personal relationships and spiritual growth, Bill and Marty share insights and personal anecdotes to help listeners navigate these complex dynamics. Discover how inner wisdom and core values can guide decisions and enhance connections. Chapters:00:00 Introduction and Hosts' Backgrounds01:07 Catching Up: Personal and Professional Updates04:31 Group Coaching and Leadership Insights06:06 The Importance of the Right Role in Business09:52 Personal Stories and Relationship Dynamics13:50 New Projects and Future Plans15:58 Main Topic Introduction: Passive vs. Active24:31 Exploring Spirituality and Personal Growth25:10 The Balance of Passivity and Activity in Coaching25:42 The Challenge of Surrender in Personal Development26:47 Writing as a Dance Between Surrender and Creation28:24 Overcoming Resistance and Shame in Writing30:34 Navigating Passive and Active Approaches in Life32:32 The Wisdom of Knowing When to Act or Let Go37:41 The Role of Al-Anon in Personal Transformation41:19 The Journey to Sobriety and Connection48:21 Concluding Thoughts and Future TopicsLinks and Resources:• True You Podcast Facebook Page - https://www.facebook.com/trueyoupodcast• If you would like to be a guest on the True You podcast, please complete this guest application. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdbHITeLbAD98TRhFPZzK2kStuHos5HFjOGBWAaTJjgVcEAGA/viewform• Internal Family Systems - https://ifs-institute.com/• Bill Tierney Coaching - https://www.billtierneycoaching.com/• Get the Compassionate Results Guidebook here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FHGJYHGV• ‘Listening is the Key', Dr. Kettelhut’s website - https://www.listeningisthekey.com/• Marty’s new book, ‘Leadership as Relation’ - https://amzn.to/3KKkCZO• Marty’s earlier book, ‘Listen… Till You Disappear’ - https://amzn.to/3XmoiZd• Parts Work Practice - Free IFS Practice Group Sessions - https://www.partsworkpractice.com• Contact Marty - mkettelhut@msn.com• Contact Bill - bill@billtierneycoaching.com

In this episode, Bill and Marty welcome guest Dr. Kathy Nielsen, a multidisciplinary scholar and software engineering professional. They discuss Kathy’s unique journey from computer programming in the Cayman Islands to teaching at the University of Colorado. The discussion weaves through themes of compassion, love, and what it means to truly know oneself. Highlights include reflections on spirituality, perceptions of inner and outer worlds, and the significance of recognizing one's heart and love in diverse roles and experiences. About Dr. Kathy:Dr. Kathy Nielson is a multi-disciplinary scholar and software engineering professional who has designed and built systems in different domains. She worked as an agile product engineering coach, helping teams learn, grow, and create together. She’’s especially interested in how both students and professionals develop their craft — and in the power of collaboration to share knowledge and create together. Outside of work, you’ll find her at the piano, chanting kirtan, exploring with her dog, or simply soaking in the beauty of the world around her.Contact Dr. Kathy: Websites: https://chimerising.org/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drkathy/Chapters:00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome00:54 Kathy Nielsen's Background and Achievements03:08 Exploring the Concept of the True Self05:50 The Philosophy of True Self and Love07:30 Practical Examples and Personal Stories12:00 Internal Family Systems and True Self16:53 Navigating Life's Challenges with True Self21:46 The Role of Love in Different Life Phases23:04 Exploring Unconditional Love Through Music24:29 Finding Beauty in Nature26:25 The Relationship Between Internal and External Worlds27:25 A Transformative Experience in Nature30:46 The Concept of Awe and Beauty31:42 The Intersection of Internal and External Realities34:15 Guiding Groups to Inner Awareness36:02 The Complexity of Inside and Outside37:59 The Power of Naming Emotions39:00 Reflections on Youth and Technology40:18 Concluding Thoughts on Choice and AwarenessLinks and Resources:• True You Podcast Facebook Page - https://www.facebook.com/trueyoupodcast• If you would like to be a guest on the True You podcast, please complete this guest application. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdbHITeLbAD98TRhFPZzK2kStuHos5HFjOGBWAaTJjgVcEAGA/viewform• Internal Family Systems - https://ifs-institute.com/• Bill Tierney Coaching - https://www.billtierneycoaching.com/• Get the Compassionate Results Guidebook here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FHGJYHGV• ‘Listening is the Key', Dr. Kettelhut’s website - https://www.listeningisthekey.com/• Marty’s new book, ‘Leadership as Relation’ - https://amzn.to/3KKkCZO• Marty’s earlier book, ‘Listen… Till You Disappear’ - https://amzn.to/3XmoiZd• Parts Work Practice - Free IFS Practice Group Sessions - https://www.partsworkpractice.com• Contact Marty - mkettelhut@msn.com• Contact Bill - bill@billtierneycoaching.com

In this episode, Bill and Marty feature special guest Guthrie Sayen. Guthrie, co-founder of the Institute for Healing and Awakening, discusses his journey and training in IFS (Internal Family Systems). He elaborates on his coaching approach, emphasizing the importance of grounding, core awareness, and field consciousness. The conversation covers the nature of trauma, the role of awareness, and how accessing our innate resources helps in healing and personal growth.About Guthrie:Co-founder of The Institute for Healing and Awakening; creator and lead trainer for Coaching with Spirit, a comprehensive coach training with a spiritual orientation; creator and lead trainer of the Coaching with IFS programs, which provide a in-depth immersion in IFS over 1.5 years with am emphasis on helping practitioners awaken.Contact Guthrie: Websites: https://www.healingandawakening.institute/ and https://www.bridgetothedivine.com/nd Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/instituteforhealingandawakeningLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/institute-for-healing-and-awakeningChapters:00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome00:53 Guthrie's Background and Training03:55 Meditation and Presence09:12 Technical Difficulties and Resuming Discussion10:58 The Four Building Blocks of Presence18:16 Consciousness and Quality of Life26:59 Understanding Consciousness and Happiness27:51 The Role of a Coach in Personal Transformation30:24 Entering the Client's System with Humility36:11 The Concept of Othering and Internal Conflict39:31 Nonviolent Communication and Core Awareness41:53 The Theory of Burdens and Innate Resources47:21 The Purpose of Shame and Healing Trauma49:23 Final Thoughts and Getting in TouchLinks and Resources:• True You Podcast Facebook Page - https://www.facebook.com/trueyoupodcast• If you would like to be a guest on the True You podcast, please complete this guest application. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdbHITeLbAD98TRhFPZzK2kStuHos5HFjOGBWAaTJjgVcEAGA/viewform• Internal Family Systems - https://ifs-institute.com/• Bill Tierney Coaching - https://www.billtierneycoaching.com/• Get the Compassionate Results Guidebook here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FHGJYHGV• ‘Listening is the Key', Dr. Kettelhut’s website - https://www.listeningisthekey.com/• Marty’s new book, ‘Leadership as Relation’ - https://amzn.to/3KKkCZO• Marty’s earlier book, ‘Listen… Till You Disappear’ - https://amzn.to/3XmoiZd• Parts Work Practice - Free IFS Practice Group Sessions - https://www.partsworkpractice.com• Contact Marty - mkettelhut@msn.com• Contact Bill - bill@billtierneycoaching.com

In this episode, Marty and Bill welcome Jesse Schuhlein, a former engineering executive turned IFS coach. Jesse shares his remarkable journey of growing BER Technologies from a small startup to a 170-person industry leader, and the moment he realized he needed a change. He recounts his transformative experiences with psychedelics, meditation, and therapy, which led him to Internal Family Systems (IFS). Today, Jesse uses his engineering background and IFS training to help others align with their true selves. About Jesse:Jesse Schuhlein is a former engineering executive who helped grow Zaber Technologies from a 3-person startup into a 170-person industry leader.In his mid-forties, he went searching for something more through psychedelics and meditation, looking for deeper answers about consciousness and the universe. That journey unexpectedly led into therapy, personal growth, and healing—and ultimately to Internal Family Systems (IFS). Today, Jesse coaches people using IFS, blending mindfulness and real-world leadership experience to help them move from chasing success to living in alignment.Contact Jesse: Website: https://www.rechargecoaching.ca/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jesse.schuhleinYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/JesseSchuhleinChapters:00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome00:51 Jesse Schuhlein’s Background and Journey03:45 Building a Successful Company07:30 Creating a Great Workplace Culture14:41 Transition to Coaching and IFS28:50 Naming the Man Club29:26 Recognizing Emotions and Discontent31:42 The Role of IFS in Coaching32:36 Understanding Internal Family Systems (IFS)33:56 Coaching vs. Therapy34:48 Client Goals and Parts Work37:11 The Importance of Self-Work for Practitioners47:38 Defining and Releasing Burdens50:33 How to Connect with Jesse52:56 Closing Remarks and Future TopicsLinks and Resources:• True You Podcast Facebook Page - https://www.facebook.com/trueyoupodcast• If you would like to be a guest on the True You podcast, please complete this guest application. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdbHITeLbAD98TRhFPZzK2kStuHos5HFjOGBWAaTJjgVcEAGA/viewform• Internal Family Systems - https://ifs-institute.com/• Bill Tierney Coaching - https://www.billtierneycoaching.com/• Get the Compassionate Results Guidebook here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FHGJYHGV• ‘Listening is the Key', Dr. Kettelhut’s website - https://www.listeningisthekey.com/• Marty’s new book, ‘Leadership as Relation’ - https://amzn.to/3KKkCZO• Marty’s earlier book, ‘Listen… Till You Disappear’ - https://amzn.to/3XmoiZd• Parts Work Practice - Free IFS Practice Group Sessions - https://www.partsworkpractice.com• Contact Marty - mkettelhut@msn.com• Contact Bill - bill@billtierneycoaching.com

In this episode, Marty and Bill welcome a special guest, Jae Geller, an IFS Informed Learning collaborator who shares the inspiring story behind merging Internal Family Systems (IFS) and u-lab's Theory U for Self-led leadership. Jae offers insights on the free online u-lab course from the Presencing Institute, its impact on global communities, and how combining it with IFS can revolutionize problem-solving and project development across various fields. About Jae:Jae Geller is an IFS-informed learning collaborator. This will be her fourth year as a student participant in the free, online course u-lab: Leading from the Emerging Future, and she would like to let listeners know about this amazing program and community from the u-school, which is a part of the Presencing Institute.  She will be hosting a group called a Hub on the u-school community platform to explore combining IFS and u-lab for Self-led leadership and would like to invite listeners to join that Hub if they are interested.Contact Jae: Website: https://www.u-school.org/offerings/ulab2025-26Chapters:00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome00:42 Podcast Evolution and Name Changes02:08 Introducing Jae Geller and Her Work03:15 Overview of u-lab and IFS04:32 Deep Dive into u-lab Course Structure16:25 Personal Experiences and Applications23:07 Combining IFS and u-lab26:37 Philosophical and Practical Insights29:33 Powerful Advice and Personal Engagement31:10 Deep Listening and Self Awareness33:36 Corporate Self and Team Dynamics36:05 Emergent Systems and Organizational Soul40:17 Practical Applications and Case Clinics53:19 Course Enrollment and CommunityLinks and Resources:• Stepping into the Field of the Future -https://mitxonline.mit.edu/courses/course-v1:MITxT+15.671.1x/ • True You Podcast Facebook Page - https://www.facebook.com/trueyoupodcast• If you would like to be a guest on the True You podcast, please complete this guest application. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdbHITeLbAD98TRhFPZzK2kStuHos5HFjOGBWAaTJjgVcEAGA/viewform• Internal Family Systems - https://ifs-institute.com/• Bill Tierney Coaching - https://www.billtierneycoaching.com/• Get the Compassionate Results Guidebook here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FHGJYHGV• ‘Listening is the Key', Dr. Kettelhut’s website - https://www.listeningisthekey.com/• Marty’s new book, ‘Leadership as Relation’ - https://amzn.to/3KKkCZO• Marty’s earlier book, ‘Listen… Till You Disappear’ - https://amzn.to/3XmoiZd• Parts Work Practice - Free IFS Practice Group Sessions - https://www.partsworkpractice.com• Contact Marty - mkettelhut@msn.com• Contact Bill - bill@billtierneycoaching.com

In this episode, Bill and Marty welcome Barti Bourgault, an esteemed executive coach and healer, to explore integral aspects of the healing journey. Barti, who holds a PCC credential from the International Coaching Federation, shares her personal path of self-discovery and healing, and discusses the intricate blend of coaching, mindfulness, and IFS (Internal Family Systems) in her practice. Through an engaging dialogue, the trio discusses the natural intelligence of human systems to heal, the importance of internal stillness, and the evolving landscape of the coaching profession.Chapters:00:00 Introduction and Episode Setup00:29 Meet the Guest: Barti Bourgault03:19 Understanding Healing Systems05:09 Integrating IFS in Coaching09:58 Barti's Personal Healing Journey17:41 Discovering Your True Self26:28 The Role of IFS in Self-Discovery30:28 Exploring Consciousness and the True Self31:10 The Challenge of Quieting the Mind32:39 The Concept of the True Self in IFS34:31 Healing and Rescuing Parts35:25 Intelligence in Survival Strategies39:03 The Evolution of Consciousness and Systems42:15 The Role of Coaches in Healing43:31 The Wounded Healer and Hero's Journey47:21 Integrating IFS in Coaching51:54 Conclusion and Final ThoughtsLinks and Resources: • True You Podcast Facebook Page - https://www.facebook.com/trueyoupodcast• If you would like to be a guest on the True You podcast, please complete this guest application. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdbHITeLbAD98TRhFPZzK2kStuHos5HFjOGBWAaTJjgVcEAGA/viewform• Internal Family Systems - https://ifs-institute.com/• Bill Tierney Coaching - https://www.billtierneycoaching.com/• Get the Compassionate Results Guidebook here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FHGJYHGV• ‘Listening is the Key', Dr. Kettelhut’s website - https://www.listeningisthekey.com/• Marty’s new book, ‘Leadership as Relation’ - https://amzn.to/3KKkCZO• Marty’s earlier book, ‘Listen… Till You Disappear’ - https://amzn.to/3XmoiZd• Parts Work Practice - Free IFS Practice Group Sessions - https://www.partsworkpractice.com• Contact Marty - mkettelhut@msn.com• Contact Bill - bill@billtierneycoaching.com

In this episode, join Marty and Bill as they welcome a special guest, Dr. Michael Gurian, a New York Times bestselling author and renowned expert in brain science, gender differences, and child development. They engage in an insightful discussion about the intersections of nature, nurture, and culture, the impact of trauma on self-identity, and the journey of understanding who we truly are. They also reflect on the importance of spiritual practices, mentorship, and the invaluable role of men's groups in personal growth and healing. About Dr. Michael Gurian:Dr. Michael Gurian, marriage and family counselor, is a New York Times bestselling author of 32 books translated into 23 languages. A pioneer in applying brain research to education, parenting, and leadership, he co-founded The Gurian Institute, which trains professionals worldwide. Recognized as a leading gender expert, he has spoken for the UN, briefed Congress, and advised the White House. Known for his dynamic presentations using case studies and brain imaging, Michael helps audiences understand gender differences and effectively support children and adults. His influential books include The Wonder of Boys, The Wonder of Girls, and Boys and Girls Learn Differently!.Contact Michael: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/gurianmichaelWebsite: www.gurianinstitute.comChapters:00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome00:47 Michael Gurian's Background and Achievements02:40 Personal Story: How I Met Michael06:23 Michael's Journey into Brain Research10:25 Understanding Gender Differences in Brain Science14:43 Nature, Nurture, and Culture Debate23:38 Diving into Identity and Self-Discovery24:43 Personal Journey and Trauma28:25 Spirituality and True Self34:33 The Role of Spiritual Guides43:18 Men's Groups and Community Support45:32 Final Thoughts and ResourcesLinks and Resources:• Michael’s website - https://www.michaelgurian.com/• True You Podcast Facebook Page - https://www.facebook.com/trueyoupodcast• Would you like to be a guest on our podcast? Complete this form to apply: https://forms.gle/Fre2eEmiNoDPYKmp9• Internal Family Systems - https://ifs-institute.com/• Bill Tierney Coaching - https://www.billtierneycoaching.com/• ‘Listening is the Key', Dr. Kettelhut’s website - https://www.listeningisthekey.com/• Marty’s new book, ‘Leadership as Relation’ - https://amzn.to/3KKkCZO• Marty’s earlier book, ‘Listen… Till You Disappear’ - https://amzn.to/3XmoiZd• Parts Work Practice - Free IFS Practice Group Sessions - https://www.partsworkpractice.com• Contact Marty - mkettelhut@msn.com• Contact Bill - bill@billtierneycoaching.com

In this episode, Bill and Marty focus on the intriguing topic of complaints. Bill introduces the concept as the 'gifted complaint' and explores how addressing our inner complaints through the lens of Internal Family Systems (IFS) can uncover deeper truths and bring about emotional healing. Martin shares a personal experience from his own coaching sessions, and the duo discusses how identifying and understanding these internal conflicts can transform and liberate our true selves. Chapters:00:00 Introduction to the True You Podcast00:33 Exploring the Topic of Complaints01:23 Group Exercise on Complaints03:56 Personal Complaints and Reflections08:28 Understanding Internal Family Systems14:05 Addressing Concerns and Building Trust21:42 Understanding the Complaint22:12 Exploring Parental Regrets22:52 Shifting Perspectives25:10 Connecting with the Past28:20 The Gift of Complaint31:58 Layers of Identity36:59 Embracing Parts with Compassion40:14 Resources for Further Exploration41:44 Final ReflectionsLinks and Resources:• ‘ Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families - adultchildren.org• ‘The Gift of Our Compulsions’ by Mary O'Malley - https://www.amazon.com/dp/1577314700 • True You Podcast Facebook Page - https://www.facebook.com/trueyoupodcast• If you would like to be a guest on the True You podcast, please complete this guest application. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdbHITeLbAD98TRhFPZzK2kStuHos5HFjOGBWAaTJjgVcEAGA/viewform• Internal Family Systems - https://ifs-institute.com/• Bill Tierney Coaching - https://www.billtierneycoaching.com/• Get the Compassionate Results Guidebook here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FHGJYHGV• ‘Listening is the Key', Dr. Kettelhut’s website - https://www.listeningisthekey.com/• Marty’s new book, ‘Leadership as Relation’ - https://amzn.to/3KKkCZO• Marty’s earlier book, ‘Listen… Till You Disappear’ - https://amzn.to/3XmoiZd• Parts Work Practice - Free IFS Practice Group Sessions - https://www.partsworkpractice.com• Contact Marty - mkettelhut@msn.com• Contact Bill - bill@billtierneycoaching.com