
Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel
Every Monday morning step into the office of iconic psychotherapist Esther Perel and listen in as real people in search of insight bare the raw, intimate, and profound details of their stories. From breakups and open relationships to workplace conflicts and fractures in the family, it’s a place to hear our own stories reflected in the lives of others. So…where should we begin? Part of the Vox Media Podcast Network.
Latest episodes

11 snips
May 19, 2025 • 1h 7min
I Took My Boss to Therapy
Explore the tumultuous yet enlightening dynamics between a manager and their direct report in a transformed workplace. Delve into the powerful impact of first impressions and the nuances of leadership styles. The conversation emphasizes the importance of identity, communication, and trust, especially within diverse teams. It also addresses emotional challenges and the complexities of team dynamics, highlighting the role of empathy and personal growth in fostering a supportive work culture.

25 snips
May 12, 2025 • 53min
Esther Calling - I Waited for You to be Ready but Now I’m 40 and Childless
A woman grapples with fear and anger after her long-term relationship collapses just when she was ready for motherhood. Unpacking her journey, she reflects on love, isolation, and the pain of unmet expectations. As she redefines her concept of family, the discussion delves into grief, communication, and the broad spectrum of pathways to parenthood. The exploration emphasizes emotional acceptance, navigating loneliness, and finding hope amidst uncertainty, offering insights for anyone facing similar life challenges.

54 snips
May 5, 2025 • 55min
Esther Calling - I Leave First So You Can't Abandon Me
This conversation dives into the caller's struggle to form deep friendships while navigating feelings of loneliness. It explores how past traumas shape emotional responses in her current relationships. The discussion highlights the complexities of familial dynamics and how unfulfilled expectations can lead to disappointment. Esther encourages a shift in perspective for healthier connections and emphasizes the importance of communication and empathy in fostering meaningful bonds. This heartfelt exploration sheds light on the quest for belonging and understanding.

28 snips
Apr 28, 2025 • 49min
Esther Calling - Stuck Between My Daughter and My Husband
A mother grapples with the mounting tension between her husband and teenage daughter, feeling trapped in the middle. The conversation dives into the complexities of family dynamics, where accountability and blame often collide. Insights on how upbringing affects current conflicts are explored, alongside coping strategies to ease emotional turmoil. The discussion underlines the need for direct communication between parents, emphasizing that understanding and flexibility are essential for healthier relationships.

102 snips
Apr 21, 2025 • 55min
Ms. Entitlement and Mr. Sacrifice Out on a Date
Dive into the intriguing complexities of a midlife relationship as a couple grapples with contrasting worldviews and desires. The discussion navigates the tension between entitlement and sacrifice, revealing how past traumas shape emotional availability. Themes of intimacy, vulnerability, and the balance between pleasure and obligation take center stage while exploring the dynamics of open relationships. Listeners will gain insights into the struggles of commitment, self-care, and the importance of redefining personal needs amidst societal pressures.

67 snips
Apr 14, 2025 • 1h 5min
I Can't Love You the Way You Want Me To
In this enlightening session, two individuals confront the turbulent waters of their relationship, revealing deep-seated communication issues and emotional scars. They explore the complexities of love, discussing the importance of appreciation and understanding each other’s love languages. Esther Perel guides them through their conflicts, emphasizing the need for vulnerability and intentional dialogue. As they reflect on personal anecdotes and the impact of past experiences, listeners gain insight into breaking destructive patterns and fostering a healthier connection.

35 snips
Apr 7, 2025 • 48min
Esther Calling - Do You Love Me for Me or For What I Do for You?
Dive into the emotional labyrinth of self-worth and connection in relationships. A Southern preacher grapples with feelings of being 'too much' while seeking authentic love. Explore how childhood experiences shape adult dynamics and the importance of vulnerability in building meaningful connections. These reflections challenge societal expectations and emphasize the need for clear communication of desires. Engage in a moment of self-awareness, addressing inner child wounds and recognizing the significance of care and support.

23 snips
Mar 31, 2025 • 51min
Esther Calling - To Forgive My Ex-Husband I Need to Forgive Myself First
A young divorcée grapples with anger and frustration as she navigates co-parenting with her ex-husband. They discuss the emotional challenges stemming from past traumas and the intricacies of communication that strain their relationship. Self-forgiveness emerges as a critical theme in healing and fostering healthier connections. The conversation delves into the cycle of blame and personal responsibility, emphasizing the need for reflection to break negative patterns. Ultimately, it's about evolving communication to support their children's well-being.

74 snips
Mar 24, 2025 • 1h 4min
You are Vocal on the Criticism But Silent on the Compliments
In this insightful discussion, a couple grapples with feelings of abandonment and isolation while raising their family. The wife feels neglected, while the husband struggles to meet both familial and personal demands. They share the emotional turmoil arising from their disconnect, highlighting the importance of appreciation, communication, and mutual understanding. The conversation emphasizes the need for self-care to nurture both the couple's relationship and their children's well-being, as they seek to rewrite their family narrative.

84 snips
Mar 17, 2025 • 56min
Esther Perel Invites Us to Imagine Our Preferred Future
In a thought-provoking conversation, Amy Webb, CEO of the Future Today Institute and renowned futurist, teams up with former Google executive Frederik Pferdt, an innovation expert. They discuss how today's technological trends shape our relationships for tomorrow. The pair explores the tension between excitement for AI advancements and anxiety about job displacement. They also emphasize the importance of storytelling, emotional engagement, and cultivating empathy to navigate uncertainty, all while envisioning a balanced, preferred future.