Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

How to Get Your Life Together: The 90/10 Rule

Mar 10, 2025

Explore how the 90/10 rule can streamline personal growth by focusing on what truly matters. Discover the core elements that drive substantial life improvements while navigating well-being through relationships and personal fulfillment. Learn about the power of small, consistent actions and the significance of self-inquiry in understanding your own happiness. Enjoy insights on overcoming emotional challenges and fostering resilience, all while simplifying your approach to self-improvement.

01:21:19

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Quick takeaways

Applying the 90/10 rule highlights that focusing on a few key actions can dramatically enhance overall happiness and well-being.

The podcast critiques the self-help industry's tendency to promote complex solutions over accessible strategies that effectively improve life satisfaction.

Consistency in simple practices, like nurturing relationships and prioritizing self-care, is crucial for achieving long-term personal growth and fulfillment.

Deep dives

Understanding the 90-10 Rule

The discussion emphasizes the relevance of the 90-10 rule in personal growth, arguing that a small fraction of our efforts can lead to the majority of our outcomes. This principle suggests that by focusing on fundamental actions, we can significantly impact our happiness and well-being. For instance, prioritizing sleep, exercise, and fostering good relationships can yield substantial improvements in life quality. The idea is that breaking down these basics can help avoid the overwhelming complexity of self-improvement strategies.

Intro

4min

Foundations of Personal Growth

16min

Focusing on Key Elements for Maximum Life Impact

4min

Navigating Well-Being: The Three Circles Approach

16min

The Power of Small Actions and Relationships

9min

The Power of Perspective in Personal Growth

3min

The Key to Personal Well-Being

25min

Mastering Life: Commitment, Resilience, and Self-Awareness

5min

There’s never been more information out there about psychology, self-improvement, and mental health, making it easy to get lost in the details and lose sight of what matters. In this special episode, Forrest and Dr. Rick apply the 90/10 rule to psychology and self-help: what are the small handful of things that tend to make the biggest difference for people?

You’ll learn why most self-help advice should probably be ignored, how to simplify your approach to happiness and personal growth, and what actually moves the needle when it comes to feeling better, getting unstuck, and building a fulfilling life.

You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Rumination Course: Rick’s 5-week online course Breaking Out of Rumination starts on March 29th. Rumination is a big pain point for many people, and this course will help you learn how to break repetitive patterns of thought. Learn more at RickHanson.com/ruminating, and use coupon code BeingWell25 to receive a 25% discount.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

2:00: Putting the big rocks in first

8:40: Root factors of well-being

15:15: Satisfaction, and what helps us rest easy

26:05: Avoidance, and responding to our own objections

32:35: Finding what matters to you, spirituality, and creative expression

36:25: Small, consistent action

39:50: Relationships and the power of repair

43:00: Stress, self-regulation, and creating space around your thoughts

48:55: Identifying your broken link, and the role of integrity

53:30: Allostatic load, and acknowledging when you’ve done your best

1:00:00: Being on your own side, pursuit mindset, and benefiting others

1:03:40: Self-concept, and joining the defense

1:06:00: Bottom up regulation, and taking one thing at a time

1:10:35: Recap

I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.

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