Modern Wisdom cover image

Modern Wisdom

#898 - Alain de Botton - How To Fix Your Negative Patterns

Feb 3, 2025
Alain de Botton, philosopher and founder of The School of Life, shares profound insights on healing and emotional growth. He discusses the origins of negative inner voices and why we often struggle with emotional connections. De Botton emphasizes the impact of childhood experiences on adult relationships, and the importance of balancing intellectual understanding with genuine emotional engagement. He offers strategies for navigating love and fear in relationships, and the transformative power of therapy for personal development.
01:53:21

Episode guests

Podcast summary created with Snipd AI

Quick takeaways

  • Negative inner voices stem from absorbed narratives, which can be reevaluated to reshape one's self-concept and identity.
  • A rich emotional vocabulary enhances understanding and processing of feelings, facilitating better relational dynamics and self-reflection.

Deep dives

Origin of Inner Voices

Inner voices often originate from external influences and experiences. Every individual internalizes the way they are spoken to, leading to self-dialogue that reflects these external voices. This process can be compared to language acquisition, where individuals learn complex grammatical structures without conscious recognition, paralleling the development of emotional language. As people grow, they learn the emotional syntax regarding gender roles, vulnerability, and interpersonal interactions, which can be deeply ingrained and challenging to alter later in life.

Get the Snipd
podcast app

Unlock the knowledge in podcasts with the podcast player of the future.
App store bannerPlay store banner

AI-powered
podcast player

Listen to all your favourite podcasts with AI-powered features

Discover
highlights

Listen to the best highlights from the podcasts you love and dive into the full episode

Save any
moment

Hear something you like? Tap your headphones to save it with AI-generated key takeaways

Share
& Export

Send highlights to Twitter, WhatsApp or export them to Notion, Readwise & more

AI-powered
podcast player

Listen to all your favourite podcasts with AI-powered features

Discover
highlights

Listen to the best highlights from the podcasts you love and dive into the full episode