
The Joe Polish Show Mastering High-Stakes Communication: How to Lead, Influence, and Connect Without Losing Control with Chris Voss, Jefferson Fisher, and Joe Polish
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Dec 26, 2025 In this engaging discussion, Chris Voss, a former FBI hostage negotiator, and Jefferson Fisher, a communication strategist, reveal the secrets of high-stakes conversations. They debunk the myth of 'finding common ground,' explaining how it can actually hinder empathy. Learn why sharing personal stories can backfire and how to truly make others feel heard. The duo also shares practical tools, like a calming breathing technique and the importance of curiosity in negotiation. Discover how to command respect without aggression and turn anger into constructive outcomes.
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Common Ground Often Backfires
- Finding demographic 'common ground' can feel good but often invalidates the other person's story.
- Jefferson Fisher warns this can make people feel stepped on and cut empathy short.
Airport Line Went Nuclear
- Jefferson recounts an angry passenger yelling at an airline agent and how his attempt at common ground provoked the passenger further.
- The passenger responded with 'Go fuck yourself' showing common ground can escalate rather than soothe.
Invest In Your Words And Model Recovery
- Audit the words you use and invest in how you talk because "what you say is who you are."
- Model recovery: own mistakes, apologize, and show the team how to repair communication.
















