The Science of Building Confidence & Self Esteem w/Harvard Psychologist Amy Cuddy EP 1198
Dec 6, 2021
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In this engaging conversation with Amy Cuddy, a Harvard lecturer and social psychologist, listeners discover the fascinating science behind personal power and confidence. She discusses overcoming trauma, the impact of body language on self-esteem, and the importance of pursuing dreams despite fear. Cuddy emphasizes practical techniques like power posing and mindful breathing to boost confidence. With personal anecdotes and insights on vulnerability, she reveals how authentic engagement can transform both personal and professional lives.
Overcoming fears and insecurities by practicing self-affirmation and understanding that our self-worth is not defined by the opinions of others.
Developing personal power involves self-reflection, self-acceptance, and acknowledging our ability to make positive changes and have influence over our own outcomes.
Engaging in expansive body language, such as standing tall and making eye contact, can boost self-assurance and project a sense of personal power.
Reframing anxiety as excitement can positively impact performance and mindset, allowing us to approach challenges with enthusiasm and motivation.
Deep dives
Overcoming fear of failure and rejection
Many people are afraid of the pressure of not performing well or being rejected. The fear of being ridiculed, laughed at, or told 'I told you so' holds them back from pursuing their dreams. It is crucial to recognize that the opinions of others should not determine our self-worth or define who we are. Practicing self-affirmation, acknowledging our values, and understanding that our value is not based on results can help overcome these fears and insecurities. Embracing an expansive posture and practicing deep, intentional breathing techniques can also help reduce anxiety and increase confidence in challenging situations.
The importance of personal power and self-belief
Personal power plays a vital role in our overall well-being and success. It is crucial to believe in our ability to make positive changes in our lives and have influence over our own outcomes. Being aware of our values and strengths, and understanding who our best selves are, contributes to developing personal power. It is important to remember that personal power is not about having power over others; it is about being in control of our internal resources, bringing forth our skills and abilities, and showing up as our most authentic and generous selves. Developing personal power involves self-reflection, self-acceptance, and acknowledging that we deserve to have power and make a positive impact on the world.
Practicing expansive body language
Our body language has a direct impact on our confidence and how others perceive us. Engaging in expansive body language, such as standing tall, shoulders back, and making eye contact, can help boost self-assurance and project a sense of personal power. Practicing good posture and being mindful of our body language not only influences how others perceive us but also affects our own mood and mindset. Being aware of our body language and consciously choosing to stand or sit in an expansive manner can contribute to feeling more confident, grounded, and present in interpersonal interactions, whether in professional or personal settings.
Reframing anxiety as excitement
Anxiety and excitement share similar physiological responses in the body. Changing our mindset and reinterpreting feelings of anxiety as excitement can have a significant impact on our performance and overall well-being. Rather than labeling ourselves as anxious, reframing our emotions as excitement can shift our perspective and mindset. Studies have shown that individuals who reinterpreted their anxiety as excitement performed better in various tasks and were able to channel that energy positively. This simple cognitive shift can help turn fear and anxiousness into enthusiasm and motivation, allowing us to approach challenges with a more positive and empowered mindset.
Belief in the goodness of others
Instead of assuming that people are out to get us, it is important to recognize that most people actually want others to succeed. While there may be some who enjoy seeing others fail, the majority of people are supportive and want to see others do well.
Building trust by being authentic
When teaching at Harvard, the speaker initially felt pressured to project a tough and impersonal persona. However, she realized that this wasn't true to who she was. Instead, she chose to approach her students with blind trust and authenticity, assuming they wanted her to succeed. This approach allowed her to build trust and foster a positive learning experience for everyone involved.
Letting go of self-doubt and embracing service
Overcoming self-doubt and anxiety about public speaking requires a shift in mindset. Instead of worrying about what others think of us, we can focus on how we can be of service to the audience. By putting our attention on adding value, entertaining, or educating, we can let go of the fear of being perfect and authentically connect with others.
Embracing individuality and allowing others to be themselves
Rather than judging or trying to fit people into boxes, it's important to embrace individuality and give space for people to be their authentic selves. Letting people express their uniqueness, without fear of judgment or conformity, creates an environment where everyone feels accepted and valued.
Today’s guest is Amy Cuddy. She’s a social psychologist, award-winning Harvard lecturer, expert on the behavioral science of power, presence, and prejudice and best-selling author of the book Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges.
In this episode we discuss what it means to have personal power and how to develop it, why it’s important to overcome trauma from the past, how to stop being afraid of going after your dreams, the science behind body posture and power posing and how it can affect your confidence, and so much more!