The Kink Consultant

This episode was recorded weeks before Koby passed. We’re sharing it with love and gratitude, in memory of him. It’s a chance to hear his voice, his story, and his spirit one more time.Episode 47 - In this episode, I get to talk to Koby Falks, adult performer, OnlyFans star, and live sex show headliner, to talk about what it’s like building a career that spans continents, from Australia to the UK and beyond.We get into the realities of performing live on stage, navigating the gay vs. straight OnlyFans markets, and why building a recognizable brand is the key to standing out. Koby also shares his experience on balancing relationships with a public sex work career, how kinks evolve over time, and why sexuality is always more fluid than labels suggest.If you’ve ever wanted the inside story of global content creation and what it really takes to build a career that lasts in this scene, this episode is for you.Episode Highlights: 00:51 Live Sex Shows in Australia05:00 Marketing and Networking in the Gay Community11:30 Maintaining a Business Relationship Post-Breakup22:01 Global Adventures in Filming24:49 Personal Kinks and Preferences30:21 The Dynamics of Sexuality34:18 Balancing Work and Personal Life

Join Pepper Kat, a creative powerhouse from the newsroom turned erotic content creator, as she discusses her journey into the world of sex work. She explores the intriguing rise of breeding kink and shares behind-the-scenes stories from her phone sex and camming experiences. Pepper delves into the strange requests she's received and emphasizes the diverse clientele behind sex work. With her unique background, she reveals how journalism skills enhance her storytelling-driven erotica, blurring the lines between business and pleasure.

Join Flora and Amanda as they dive into skincare tips specifically for impact play enthusiasts. Discover how to manage bruising, prevent hyperpigmentation, and maintain healthy skin. They share pre-and post-play routines that keep your skin soft and ready for action. Explore the emotional aftermath of big kink events and practical self-care tips to combat party drop. Plus, learn about the importance of hydration and accessible skincare products to ensure every cheek gets the TLC it deserves.

Mistress Verna, a retired professional dominatrix, shares her intriguing insights from years spent in a dungeon. She reflects on the complexities of client relationships, revealing emotional aftermath and unexpected confessions that often arose during sessions. Verna discusses how her work expanded her understanding of sexuality and boundaries, while also emphasizing the importance of consent and personal agency. Listeners gain a glimpse into the skills acquired through this unique profession and the deep connections made with clients over time.

Mistress Verna, a former professional dominatrix, shares her wild tales from the chaotic world of a New York City dungeon. She discusses the unexpected realities of client dynamics, including mind games and secret negotiations. Verna humorously recounts the hazing rituals and insider politics that shaped their working environment. From navigating safety protocols during police raids to maintaining privacy amidst gossip, she reveals that being a pro dom is about mastering boundaries and understanding power dynamics, not just fulfilling fantasies.

Episode 42 -Why is it so hard to talk about sex, even with people we trust? In this episode of The Kink Consultant, I’m joined by Tess and Kels, co-founders of Squirm and co-hosts of the Porn Nerds podcast, to explore how we can make sex ed not just informative but also sexy, playful, and actually useful.We dive into their journey from coworkers to creative collaborators, their mission to destigmatize conversations about porn and desire, and how they built Squirm as a space where adult sex ed meets humor, eroticism, and real communication. From their audio course Oral Hygiene to their Get Squirmy card deck and live events, Tess and Kels are helping people go beyond shame and speak about sex with clarity, confidence, and creativity.Whether you’ve struggled to talk about what turns you on, want to bring more curiosity into your kink conversations, or simply wish porn had a better PR team, this episode will expand your vocabulary, your imagination, and your confidence in navigating communication around sex, BDSM, and desire.Get 20% off of the Get Squirmy Conversation Deck when you use the code: KINKCONSULTANThttps://www.getsquirmy.com/product-page/get-squirmyEpisode Highlights: 03:45 Introducing Squirm: Sex Ed for Adults06:32 The Concept of Sexy Sex Ed17:23 The Role of Porn in Sex Education21:52 Contextualizing Media and Reality25:20 Porn as a Tool for Sexual Exploration27:06 Navigating Sexual Communication36:45 Exploring the Get Squirmy EventsConnect with Tess and Kels https://linktr.ee/squirmConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1Ready to explore your desires and elevate your intimate life? Book your FREE 20-minute consultation with The Kink Consultant and discover how personalized coaching can help you unlock your full potential. Whether you’re curious about kink, want to spice things up, or need expert guidance, this is your chance to get tailored advice that meets you where you are. Don’t miss out—schedule your session now and take the first step toward a more fulfilling, authentic you! ⁠Book your consultation here⁠.

Join Aubrey Aust, a Master's student at NYU specializing in relational safety, as she dives into the world of power dynamics, attachment styles, and BDSM. Aubrey explains how kink can illuminate vulnerability and consent in ways mainstream relationships often overlook. She discusses the importance of curiosity in examining ingrained patterns, the role of somatic psychology in understanding our bodies' signals, and how negotiating power dynamics fosters safety. This conversation offers profound insights into building healthier connections and understanding our relational wiring.

Episode 40 -Ever wondered what it’s like to be the face and body on the cover of your favorite romance novel? In this episode of The Kink Consultant, I sit down with real-life couple Jose and Andrea (aka Mama) to talk about what it’s like to build a modeling career out of smut, how kink became part of their dynamic, and the power of being seen, desired, and fully expressed.We dive into how Mama helped launch Jose’s modeling and acting career, what it means to embody fantasy for an audience while staying grounded in real-life connection, and how kink helped deepen their intimacy after decades together. From daddy/little dynamics to caretaking, long-distance journaling, and the gift of growing older while still exploring, this conversation is equal parts sexy, sweet, and deeply affirming.Whether you’ve ever dreamed of being on a book cover, or you’re just curious what it’s like behind the scenes of a real-life smut model relationship, this one’s for you.Episode Highlights: 01:01 From Childhood Friends to Lifelong Partners05:53 Transitioning from Military to Modeling12:02 Exploring Romance Novels Together14:31 Opening Up About Desires21:59 Navigating Book Conventions32:35 Balancing Personal and Couple Growth36:10 Jose's Journey into Acting39:45 Advice for Aspiring Cover ModelsConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Join The Kinky Book Club: https://www.patreon.com/amandadames/membershipSpeak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1Ready to explore your desires and elevate your intimate life? Book your FREE 20-minute consultation with The Kink Consultant and discover how personalized coaching can help you unlock your full potential. Whether you’re curious about kink, want to spice things up, or need expert guidance, this is your chance to get tailored advice that meets you where you are. Don’t miss out—schedule your session now and take the first step toward a more fulfilling, authentic you! ⁠Book your consultation here⁠.

Sir Marvelous, a professional dominator and pleasure coach, shares insights into the world of BDSM and power dynamics. He emphasizes the difference between dominance and leadership, highlighting the importance of communication and ongoing negotiation in kink. Marvelous explores the intersection of pleasure and personal growth, discussing techniques like edging and psychological play. He also delves into the significance of curiosity and experimentation in relationships, urging listeners to invest in their pleasure and explore new experiences together.

My favorite kink singer-songwriter needs our help. Deore, the incredible artist behind the Brat EP, is back and this time, she’s gearing up to release a full-length concept album called Tantrums. But in true brat fashion, she’s doing it her way: no label, no safety net, and fully trusting her kinky, ride-or-die community to bring it to life.In this episode of The Kink Consultant, we talk about what it means to quit your job, follow your creative calling, and make music that actually reflects the reality of kink. Deore opens up about writing Tantrums from scratch, navigating service sub dynamics while in creative mode, and the very bratty legal battle over a coffee ban that had all of Instagram in stitches. We also get into how kink shows up in her relationship, how her Dom evolved alongside her, and why the idea of “ready-made” Doms is a myth.If you’e also craving for more kinky music or just want to support someone making wildly accurate, emotionally raw bangers about submission, dominance, and desire, this is the episode (and the crowdfund) to show up for. Head to Indiegogo and search Tantrums to support the album before time runs out.Support The Album Here: https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/tantrums-a-kinky-concept-album#/Connect with Deore: https://www.instagram.com/deorebby/Episode Highlights: 01:44 The Journey of Creating the Brat Album09:20 The Kink Council and Coffee Ban Saga21:11 Challenges in Music Production21:42 Overcoming Vulnerability and Trust Issues24:18 Crowdfunding and Community Support26:31 Kink and Relationship Dynamics28:52 The Role of Media in Kink Exploration34:39 Upcoming Album and Crowdfunding DetailsConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠I’m Co-Authoring a Book! Get updated here: https://www.complicatedpleasures.caSpeak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1Ready to explore your desires and elevate your intimate life? Book your FREE 20-minute consultation with The Kink Consultant and discover how personalized coaching can help you unlock your full potential. Whether you’re curious about kink, want to spice things up, or need expert guidance, this is your chance to get tailored advice that meets you where you are. Don’t miss out—schedule your session now and take the first step toward a more fulfilling, authentic you! ⁠Book your consultation here⁠.