back from the borderline

Tune in for a free preview of this premium BFTB episode where we discuss all things related to how to cope with anxious or phobic feelings around death and dying. I understand this fear deeply because it’s ruled much of my life. And chances are it’s ruling yours, too. Turns out that learning more deeply about this subject and exploring how other cultures approach it instead of shoving my fears down further into my psyche has helped me more than anything else so far. I hope what I share can help, even just a bit. Because let's face it - the fact is that the idea of death is scary as hell for everyone, even if they won't admit it. TOPICS DISCUSSED:✧ How to become more comfortable with the idea of death and dying✧ What is Thanatophobia? (death anxiety / fear of death) – symptoms and overcoming it✧ How different cultures deal with and view death (and the major differences between East and West) ✧ An exploration on Ram Dass’ view on death and dying: “Death is perfectly safe. It’s like taking off a tight shoe.”Enjoyed this episode? Explore more as a Premium Submarine. Dive deep into hundreds of hours of ad-free exclusive content and full-length episodes on Patreon, including my original BPD recovery series, guided meditations, and much more. Click here to preview the premium collections you’ll unlock access to for as little as a couple of cups of coffee a month. Learn more and join at backfromtheborderline.com.The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What if you could tap into the wisdom of those who have passed on, making their guidance available at your fingertips? Perdita Finn believes it's not only possible but essential. In her book, "Take Back the Magic: Conversations with the Unseen World," she invites us to reclaim the forgotten guidance of the deceased and rekindle the magic and miracles in our lives. Finn masterfully weaves memoir, history, and a non-denominational spirituality rooted in ecology, encouraging readers to embrace the idea that the stories of our lives are far older, grander, and more compassionate than we've been led to believe. The journey she takes us on is one of healing, possibility, and love, as she shares her personal story of reconciling with her patriarchal father long after his passing. This episode will resonate most deeply with you if: ✧ You struggle with anxious or phobic feelings around death and dying (Thanatophobia)✧ You are dealing with bereavement and grief after the death of a loved one✧ You have lost someone with whom you’ve had a difficult or complicated relationship (how to process the death of someone who negatively affected your life) ✧ You battle with feelings of “affective ambivalence” (when you love and hate someone at the same time)✧ You want to learn how to better process your feelings of rage, anger and resentment✧ You have always felt the deep sense of interconnectedness of all living beings✧ You’re seeking to tap into / deepen your trust with your intuition TIME STAMPS00:00 – 01:27: Voicemail from Mikayla01:27 – 08:02: The importance of developing a more flexible, holistic, and integral perspective when it comes to spirituality08:02 – 15:32: How different cultures honor, pay respects to, and engage with the dead15:32 – 20:53: About my guest, Perdita Finn20:53 – 01:20:55: Interview with Perdita Finn RESOURCES✧ Click here to buy “Take Back the Magic: Conversations with the Unseen World”✧ Click here to read my Substack article on revenge and repressed anger✧ Click here to subscribe to Perdita’s Substack✧ Click here to read more about The Finn/Clark family’s free non-denominational Rosary groups✧ Click here to read the book Perdita co-wrote with her “reluctant” psychic Enjoyed this episode? Explore more as a Premium Submarine. Dive deep into hundreds of hours of ad-free exclusive content and full-length episodes on Patreon, including my original BPD recovery series, guided meditations, and much more. Click here to preview the premium collections you’ll unlock access to for as little as a couple of cups of coffee a month. Learn more and join at backfromtheborderline.com.The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this Premium Submarine exclusive, you’ll hear a preview of my response to a voicemail from a listener who is stumped as to why she continues to fall into the repetitive pattern of falling fast for unavailable partners.Questions answered + topics discussed in this episode:✧ What is limerence?✧ How to tell if your feelings for your romantic interest are infatuation or love ✧ What are the stages of limerence?✧ How to manage limerent feelings and stop repeating self-sabotaging patterns✧ Why some people are attracted to more avoidant partners (and why anxious and avoidant people tend to attract one another)✧ Why do anxiously attached individuals often begin to resent or split on more avoidant partners✧ How growing up in dysfunctional high-conflict homes can make us more attracted to high-conflict relationships (making safe/kind partners seem “boring”)Enjoyed this episode? Explore more as a Premium Submarine. Dive deep into hundreds of hours of ad-free exclusive content and full-length episodes on Patreon, including my original BPD recovery series, guided meditations, and much more. Click here to preview the premium collections you’ll unlock access to for as little as a couple of cups of coffee a month. Learn more and join at backfromtheborderline.com.The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ever feel like you’ve hit a dead end in your recovery journey? Like you’re the one person destined to remain stuck in cycles of trauma, self-sabotage, and doubt? What if the answers you’re seeking are already within you, waiting to be accessed? In this transformative episode, we explore the healing power of imagination, creativity, and inner wisdom. Dr. Stephen Aizenstat, a pioneer in the field of depth psychology, joins me to guide us through reconnecting with our deeper selves. By tapping into this “core matrix” of imagination, we can access a greater intelligence that not only heals but also empowers us to become the agents of change our world needs. Dr. Aizenstat, founder of Pacifica Graduate Institute and Dream Tending, has collaborated with leading minds in psychology, mythology, and indigenous wisdom to explore the profound role of dreams and imagination in healing. His decades-long work offers practical insights for those ready to step beyond the limitations of rational thinking and embrace a more holistic, creative approach to growth and self-discovery.Topics Covered and Questions Answered in This Episode:The Role of Imagination in Healing: How reclaiming creativity and imagination in adulthood can provide us with transformative insights often overlooked by rational thinking.Why Modern Culture Disregards Intuition: Exploring the Western preference for logic over intuition and the cultural shift that suppressed our imaginative faculties.Active Imagination as a Tool for Self-Discovery: Using imagination to connect with our inner "parts" or "subpersonalities" and integrate them into a more harmonious self.Reframing Suicidal Thoughts as a Call for Transformation: Understanding deep emotional pain as a signal for psychic initiation or change.Grief Rituals and Healing: The role of intentional rituals in processing grief and fostering emotional resilience.Projection and Relational Pain: Why we often project unresolved pain onto others and how to reclaim ownership of these feelings.Facing Ambivalence about Death: Acknowledging and exploring our fears around mortality as part of a holistic healing journey.Tuning into the Inner Self: Practical ways to connect with the deeper self, whether seen as True Nature, Higher Self, Buddha-nature, or Christ-consciousness.The Life-Changing Power of Curiosity: How cultivating a curious approach toward life can shift our mental state and open us to new possibilities.Healing Emptiness by Engaging with Your “Inner Council”: Developing a relationship with your inner guides and mentors to navigate chronic feelings of emptiness. Resources:✧ Click here to purchase Stephen’s new book “The Imagination Matrix”✧ Visit https://dreamtending.com/ to learn more about Stephen’s Dream Tending programs Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is a free preview of episode one of "Unbuttoned. My new "podcast within a podcast" with my partner in crime (and life) Zaz. To unlock the full episode (as well as hundreds of hours of other bonus content) sign up for my Patreon community today. More details on that below. ↴ References:◦ UFO of God by Chris Bledsoe◦ Duncan Trussell Family Hour Podcast – E574: Ryan Bledsoe◦ UFOs and Miracles – interview with Chris Bledsoe on New Thinking Allowed with Jeffrey Mishlove, PhDCraving more episodes like this one? Want to unlock the full version? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Join meme aficionado Sarah Mergen as she discusses depression as an altered state of consciousness, the link between depression and intuition, the misuse of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), and the question of living in a simulation.

In a world of constant scrolling and instant advice, many of us lose touch with the wealth of wisdom within us—often ignoring dreams as mere “woo-woo nonsense.” But what if the key to deeper self-knowledge, insight, and even healing lies in reconnecting with our dreams? In this episode, we challenge the modern habit of looking outward for answers and explore how dreams can reveal messages from our bodies, minds, and innermost selves. By reclaiming our dreams, we open ourselves to a unique, personal path toward healing. Joining me is Naomi Sangreal, a psychotherapist, dream expert, and artist who integrates Jewish mysticism and depth psychology into her work. Together, we’ll discuss the historical and cultural significance of dreams, why dream symbolism is a powerful tool for inner work, and why relying on quick online “dream dictionaries” often oversimplifies the complex language of our unconscious.Key Topics Discussed:Why dreams matter and how they can guide our healing journeyThe historical and cultural importance of dreams across timeHow dreams are used in modern psychotherapyWhy we often struggle to remember our dreams and how to improve dream recallSymbolism in dreams: what it is and how to interpret itThe rarity and significance of prophetic or “important” dreamsWhy most online “dream dictionaries” are inaccurate and limitingTIME STAMPS00:00 – 14:37 | Why we dismiss dreams and why they’re more meaningful than we think14:37 – 59:47 | Interview with Naomi Sangreal on dream symbolism, mysticism, and healing01:01:26 – 01:16:50 | Listener Voicemail from Annah: “Am I emotionally manipulative?”01:16:50 – 01:44:48 | Listener Voicemail from Saia: When jealousy, insecurity, and body image issues impact relationshipsAbout the Guest: Naomi Sangreal is a psychotherapist and dream expert specializing in integrating depth psychology, art, and Jewish mysticism. With an MA in Counseling and Depth Psychology from Pacifica Graduate Institute and a BA in Transpersonal Psychology and Art Therapy from Naropa University, she provides a unique blend of spiritual insight and psychological expertise to her clients. Naomi’s new book, Little Hidden Doors, offers readers a deeper look into the world of dreams and healing. Follow Naomi on Instagram @psychesdreamwitch or visit her website at magicalpsychotherapy.com.Prepare to reconnect with a part of yourself you may have forgotten and discover how your dreams could be your most profound guide toward transformation and growth.Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, we’ll delve into the intricate connections between toxic shame, family scapegoating abuse, and the enduring impact of repressed anger in adulthood. You’ll learn about the alignment between the family scapegoat and traits like intuition, empathy, and sensitivity. You’ll also witness a dynamic portrayal of rage, revenge, and anger in TV and film, and learn the catharsis that can come with tapping into these primal emotions within your own psyche. Check out the time stamps below for a more detailed description of the topics covered in this episode. These time markers will allow you to skip to the sections that most interest you or listen to again to portions that you require additional exploration or self-inquiry. TIME STAMPS:00:00 – 12:30: An exploration of how the core wounds of toxic shame and family scapegoating abuse contribute to repressed anger in adulthood that wreaks havoc on our lives12:30 – 25:10: The origins of the term “scapegoat” that uncover the hidden gifts and inherent strength in this dysfunctional family role25:10 – 38:39: Why the family scapegoat is often an intuitive, empath, or HSP (highly sensitive person)38:36 – 42:48: The importance of being able to tap into your repressed anger42:41 – 52:52: Rage + Anger edit (examples of expressions of rage, revenge, and anger from TV and film)52:49 – 56:34: How to use the rage + anger edit for primal scream therapy56:29 – 01:31:40: Storytime (reading aloud my newest Substack article “revenge and repressed anger” with personal reflections)01:31:40 – 01:37:37: Reflections + introduction of new BFTB partner PureSpectrum CBD01:40:28 – 02:37:58: Repressed anger and the highly sensitive person – exploration of article by psychologist Imi Lo (how repressed anger can appear in various forms and how to release it in healthy ways) Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I recently came across an interview with singer-songwriter and creative maverick Erykah Badu on YouTube. Her words were so impactful for me in this phase of my recovery journey that I knew I had to make an episode that included my favorite clips. Although she came from humble beginnings, Erykah’s “mutable” and child-like approach to life has unlocked a lifetime and career of possibilities. This episode will make you feel like you’re sitting down with your best friend, giving you the tough love that you may not want, but desperately need.TIME STAMPS: 00:00 – 7:32: Introduction (who is Erykah Badu and why I believe her attitude towards life is so inspiring)7:28 – 8:17: The importance of looking forward to the future, rather than dreading it  8:17 – 15:31: How Erykah Badu views the development of a solid sense of self and identity (the importance of becoming “mutable,” or more flexible rather than rigid in life)15:31 – 20:16: On not letting the opinions of others influence you or deter you from doing what you want, and learning to pace yourself 20:16 – 23:14: on facing the sexism and importance placed on looks in the music industry and mainstream media in the 90s23:14 – 27:45: The advice Erykah Badu would give her “naïve” younger self (how to not become influenced by the thoughts and feelings of others)27:45 – 31:31: How hip hop culture helped Erykah Badu cultivate her creative identity and confidence31:31 – 34:53: How Erykah’s focus on “reinvention” and metamorphosis is her primary driver34:53 – 39:07: Erykah’s advice on style and aesthetics (how to cultivate your own unique style)39:07 – 48:21: Where does the word “woke” come from and how has it evolved? (How Erykah Badu including this in her song “Master Teacher” and tweeting it out regarding the scandal surrounding Russian activist group Pussy Riot gave the word “woke” a life of its own)48:21 – 52:42: Why Erykah Badu believes we should avoid putting ourselves in “boxes” and the way labels can keep us stuck in rigid forms that don’t allow for growth and metamorphosis52:42 – 57:26: On the importance of staying child-like while she unlearns toxic behaviors and stays conscious in her role as a mother57:26 – 01:02:02: How Erykah uses her art and creativity to transmute and transform the wounds from generational trauma01:02:02 – 01:05:21: Why we shouldn’t copy the path of others and the importance of finding our own way in life (ikigai philosophy) 01:05:21 – 01:15:38: The best and worst advice Erykah Badu has ever received (reflections on the hermetic principal “as above, so below”)Click here to the full interview on YouTube (“Mavericks with Ari Melber: Erykah Badu,” March 29th, 2023)Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Join me for the third and final episode in this 3-part series exploring the hidden complexities of the “scapegoat” or “black sheep” role within dysfunctional family dynamics. Family scapegoats start as innocent children or adolescents who bear the weight of projected family trauma. In this series, we’ll journey through the origins and consequences of scapegoating abuse, both in early childhood, as well as its lingering impact in adulthood. Together, we’ll explore how these experiences shape our emotional landscapes and relationships. By working with and integrating the concepts covered, you’ll discover valuable insights into breaking free from this suffocating role, allowing you to embark on a journey towards healing and liberation. It is my sincere hope that you can begin to unmask the layers of this covert form of psycho-emotional abuse, and learn to reclaim your narrative, rewriting a story of resilience and transformation beyond this dysfunctional label that was never yours to begin with. TIME STAMPS SCAPEGOATING SERIES PART 3: 00:00 – 04:46: Intro and reflections04:46 – 29:16: Moving through the 5 stages of grief as a scapegoated adult child29:16 – 01:00:08: Why is the stage of acceptance so difficult for those who have endured scapegoating abuse? PREMIUM: LISTENER VOICEMAILS:  01:00:08 – 01:26:12: Voicemail from Joslyn (moving on from a complicated breakup that involves trauma bonding, family enmeshment and addiction)01:26:12 – 01:36:59: Voicemail from Jane (the difficulty that comes with trying to make a relationship work with someone who is in a different phase of their life)01:36:57 – 01:45:44: Voicemail update from Lauren (more on her complicated entanglement with her work colleague)Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.