Her Best Self: Freedom from Disordered Eating, Body Obsession & Perfectionism

Hey girlfriend, happy day after Thanksgiving. Maybe yesterday was really hard for you. Maybe you broke a boundary. Maybe you're beating yourself up right now. Maybe you barely survived Thanksgiving dinner and you're exhausted. You made it through. You're here. And today, we're going to talk about gratitude anyway. In this special mini episode, host Lindsey Nichol gets vulnerable about a season when she couldn't feel grateful for anything - when she was so trapped in her eating disorder that gratitude felt impossible. She shares what she's genuinely, deeply thankful for this season, and invites you to find your own gratitude too - even in the mess, even in the middle of the struggle. Because here's the truth: Gratitude doesn't require perfection. It doesn't require having it all together. It doesn't require that yesterday went well. Gratitude just requires being willing to look for the light, even in the hard. Plus: A special Black Friday opportunity to invest in yourself and your recovery (because the best investment you'll ever make is in your own healing). This is a quick dose of hope, vulnerability, and possibility for the day after Thanksgiving. You survived yesterday. Now let's find the gratitude together. In This Mini Episode, You'll Hear: If Yesterday Was Hard Maybe you broke a boundary at Thanksgiving dinner Maybe you're beating yourself up today Maybe you barely survived and you're exhausted You made it through - and that matters Today we're talking about gratitude anyway When Gratitude Felt Impossible Lindsey's vulnerable truth: there was a season she couldn't FEEL gratitude Not that she wasn't grateful - she literally couldn't access the feeling Trapped in the eating disorder, consumed, numb, disconnected Sitting at Thanksgiving tables saying generic things but not feeling it Just surviving, just getting through, counting and calculating If that's where you are today - Lindsey sees you, she's been you Recovery gave her gratitude back - the ability to not just say it but FEEL it That's possible for you too What Lindsey Is Thankful For This Season: #1: Her Clients and Listeners (YOU) This community of women fighting for their freedom Doing the hard things, showing up even when it's scary Women in one-on-one coaching keeping promises to themselves Women in Recovery Collective supporting each other Messages saying "this episode came at the exact right time" You inspire her every single day You remind her why she does this work You remind her that recovery is possible Thank you for trusting her with your stories #2: Recovery Is a Journey That it's not linear Constantly evolving, growing, teaching Used to think recovery meant "fixed" - arriving at perfection But recovery taught her it's not about arriving, it's the JOURNEY Learning and growing and evolving Becoming more of who she's meant to be, one choice at a time Grateful she gets to keep learning and discovering Grateful she gets to mess up and extend herself grace Recovery isn't a destination - it's a way of life Choosing yourself every day #3: Keeping Promises  This might sound small, but it's everything For so long, she broke every promise to herself Every broken promise reinforced she couldn't trust herself Recovery taught her that keeping promises builds self-trust Proves to herself she's worthy of showing up for Now she keeps her promises - not perfectly, but consistently That has changed everything She can look in the mirror and know when she says she'll do something, she does it That's freedom. That's recovery. Your Gratitude Invitation What are YOU thankful for this season? It might feel hard, especially if yesterday was rough But look for it anyway - gratitude doesn't require perfection Maybe you're thankful you made it through Thanksgiving (even if messy) Maybe you're thankful for one person who showed up for you Maybe you're thankful you're still here, still fighting, still trying Maybe you're thankful for your body (even if you don't love it) because it's carrying you Maybe you're thankful that recovery is possible, even if you're not there yet Find it. Write it down. Speak it out loud. Let yourself feel it. Gratitude is a practice - the more we practice, the more we can access it Black Friday Investment Opportunity Today is Black Friday - you're getting a million emails about sales But Lindsey wants to offer something different: investing in YOURSELF The best investment you'll ever make is in your own healing Two special opportunities available today through Sunday Special Black Friday Offers (Through Sunday Only): Option 1: Recovery Collective - $47/month What You Get: Live group coaching calls every other week (one hour each) Texting chat community for support between calls Connection with other women who GET IT Accountability, tools, and strategies for your recovery journey This is for you if: You need community and support You want guidance but aren't ready for one-on-one yet You're tired of doing this alone You want connection with women who understand Join here: www.herbestself.co/recoverycollective  Option 2: One-on-One Personalized Coaching - $500 OFF What You Get: Weekly coaching sessions customized for YOU Someone walking beside you every single week A plan specifically for YOUR challenges, triggers, and recovery path Personalized, intensive support to get from where you are to where you want to be This is for you if: You're ready for customized, personalized support You want someone in your corner weekly You need a plan made specifically for you You're done doing this alone How to Claim Either Offer: Go to www.herbestself.co and fill out a client application. These offers are ONLY available through Sunday. Limited spots available. If you're thinking: "This is my sign" - it is "I can't do this alone anymore" - you don't have to "I'm ready to invest in myself" - Lindsey is here for you Black Friday isn't just about buying things. It's about investing in what matters. And YOU matter. Your recovery matters. Your freedom matters. Key Takeaways: ✨ You made it through Thanksgiving - even if it was hard, you're here ✨ Gratitude doesn't require perfection or having it all together ✨ There was a season Lindsey couldn't FEEL gratitude - she was too numb, too consumed ✨ Recovery gave her the ability to feel gratitude again - that's possible for you too ✨ Lindsey is grateful for: her clients/listeners, recovery as a journey, keeping promises to herself ✨ You can find gratitude even in the struggle - even if it's small ✨ Recovery isn't a destination, it's a journey - constantly evolving and growing ✨ Keeping promises to yourself builds self-trust and proves you're worth showing up for ✨ The best investment you'll ever make is in your own healing ✨ Black Friday offers available through Sunday: Recovery Collective $47/month or $500 off 1-on-1 Powerful Quotes from This Episode: "Maybe yesterday was really hard for you. Maybe you broke a boundary. Maybe you're beating yourself up. You made it through. You're here." "Gratitude doesn't require perfection. It doesn't require having it all together. It doesn't require that yesterday went well" "Gratitude just requires being willing to look for the light, even in the hard" "There was a season of my life when I couldn't feel grateful for anything. I literally couldn't FEEL it" "I was so consumed, so numb, so disconnected from myself that I couldn't access those feelings" "Recovery gave me my gratitude back. It gave me the ability to not just say I'm thankful, but to actually FEEL it" "You inspire me every single day. You remind me why I do this work" "Recovery isn't a destination. It's a way of life. It's choosing yourself every day" "Keeping promises to myself is how I build trust with myself" "That's freedom, girlfriend. That's recovery" "Gratitude is a practice. The more we practice it, the more we can access it" "The best investment you'll ever make is in your own healing" "Black Friday isn't just about buying things. It's about investing in what matters" "YOU matter. Your recovery matters. Your freedom matters" Gratitude Practice for You: Your Invitation: Write down 3 things you're thankful for this season. Prompts if You're Struggling: What's one thing that went RIGHT yesterday (even if small)? Who is one person in your corner? What's one thing your body did for you yesterday? What's one step you've taken in recovery (no matter how small)? What's one hope you have for your future? What's one thing you can appreciate about yourself today? Remember: It doesn't have to be big It doesn't have to be perfect It can be messy It can be hard to find That's okay - you're practicing The Practice: Write it down (in your Tarjay journal!) Speak it out loud Let yourself feel it, even for just a moment Come back to it when things get hard Questions to Reflect On: About Yesterday: How do you feel about how Thanksgiving went? Are you beating yourself up about something? What's one thing you can give yourself grace for? Did you make it through? (If yes, that counts!) About Gratitude: When was the last time you felt genuine gratitude? What made that moment different? What's blocking you from feeling grateful today? Can you practice looking for light even in the hard? About Your Recovery: Are you doing this alone or do you have support? What would change if you had community? What would change if you had personalized guidance? What's holding you back from investing in yourself? About Black Friday: What are you investing in today? What if you invested in YOUR healing instead of just "stuff"? What would it mean to prioritize yourself? Is this your sign to finally get support? Who This Episode Is For: This mini episode is for you if: Yesterday (Thanksgiving) was really hard You're beating yourself up today You barely survived Thanksgiving dinner You feel exhausted and triggered You can't feel gratitude right now You're numb and disconnected You made it through but don't feel proud You want to find gratitude but don't know how You need a reminder that you're not alone You're considering getting support but haven't yet You've been doing this alone and you're tired You're ready to invest in yourself You need community or personalized guidance You want to make next Thanksgiving different Why This Episode Matters: Timing: Released the day after Thanksgiving when: You're exhausted from surviving yesterday You might be triggered or beating yourself up You're looking for hope and encouragement You're in the mindset of investment (Black Friday) You're thinking about what you want to be different next year Message: You don't have to be perfect to practice gratitude. You don't have to have a "good" Thanksgiving to find things to be thankful for. And you don't have to do recovery alone. Opportunity: Special Black Friday offers make this the PERFECT time to invest in yourself and get the support you need so next year is different. Ready to Invest in Your Recovery? Don't Wait Until Next Thanksgiving to Get Support You just survived another Thanksgiving trapped in the eating disorder. You made it through, but was it how you want to live? Next year can be different. But only if you get support NOW. Two Options Available Through Sunday: Recovery Collective - $47/month Group support, bi-weekly calls, texting community. You're not alone anymore. One-on-One Coaching - $500 OFF Personalized support, weekly sessions, custom plan for YOU. Finally get the guidance you need. Apply now at herbestself.co Offers end Sunday. Limited spots available. This is your sign. This is your moment. Invest in yourself. Connect with Lindsey Website: www.herbestself.co  Private Facebook Community: Her Best Self Society www.herbestselfsociety.com  1:1 Client Applications: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms . Subscribe & Review: If this episode resonated with you—please subscribe to Her Best Self wherever you listen to podcasts and leave a review. Your reviews help other women who are tired of perfectionism and living trapped in their mind and body find this show and realize they're not alone. Share this episode with a friend who needs to hear the truth! About the Host Lindsey Nichol is a former competitive figure skater turned God-led entrepreneur, boy mom, and digital CEO. She understands how core beliefs formed in childhood can create and maintain eating disorder patterns, and she's passionate about helping women identify and transform these beliefs to find lasting freedom. If this episode helped you feel hopeful again and remember your worth isn't found in your body or on your plate, please share it with someone who needs to hear this message. Your support helps more women break the chains of limiting beliefs. *While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Your family doesn't understand your eating disorder. They make comments about your food. They trigger you at every holiday gathering. You're walking on eggshells, feeling attacked, and wondering if recovery is even possible around them. Girlfriend, this episode is for you. Host Lindsey Nichol shares an incredibly vulnerable moment - her mom called crying after listening to the podcast for the first time, saying "I had no idea what I was doing during your recovery. I just knew I needed to help you." This emotional conversation revealed a profound truth: families don't understand because they're trying to understand while dealing with their own pain. In this powerful episode, Lindsey addresses both sides of the struggle - what to do when your family doesn't understand your eating disorder, AND what loved ones need to know about supporting someone in recovery. Because the truth is, hurt people hurt people. And your family's "attacks" might actually be their way of coping with fear, denial, and their own feelings of helplessness. Whether you're dreading Thanksgiving dinner, anxious about Christmas gatherings, or just trying to survive family events without being triggered - this episode gives you the boundaries, scripts, and strategies you need to protect your recovery while staying connected to the people you love. This is for you if you're struggling. This is for you if you're supporting someone. This is for all of us navigating the complexity of family, recovery, and the holidays. In This Episode, You'll Hear: Lindsey's Mom's Tearful Phone Call Her mom called crying after listening to the podcast for the first time "I had no idea what I was doing through your healing journey" "I just knew you were my only child and I wasn't gonna have it" How she educated herself about eating disorders but still felt lost "Most of the time I had no idea what to do next" The growth that's happened over the years in their relationship Why this conversation was so powerful and needed The Truth About Family Not Understanding When your family doesn't understand, it can be paralyzing Even though Lindsey's mom didn't understand HOW to support her, she loved her The message: Love doesn't always know how to show up correctly There is so much happening in your mind that family can't see The growth that happens over time as you work through recovery together Why This Matters for YOU You don't have to sit in this mess and let it become who you are This is just a speed bump in your journey If you're a parent struggling with what to do next, you don't have to have it all figured out It's important to get as educated as possible to support your loved one The importance of boundaries on BOTH sides during recovery The Reality: Your ED Affects Everyone This illness affects and hurts every person close to you Yes, it's isolating, but it echoes to everyone around you like dominoes You can be in your own feelings thinking it's not harming people, but it is If you don't have energy, you're snapping at your kids If you aren't nourishing yourself, you're not giving your best to others You may be triggered by family comments, but they're dealing with their own emotions too Why Your Family Seems Unsupportive Everyone in your life has their own way of coping with what you're struggling with If you're resisting recovery, your family might be resisting change too They may seem unsupportive or attacking, but this is THEIR way of handling and coping Lindsey's mom was terrified and avoiding judgment from others She told NO ONE - not even immediate family She took it on as self-blame: "What did I do wrong as a parent?" Your illness is NOT isolated - it's impacting everyone, even if it feels isolating to you The Walking on Eggshells Reality Lindsey's mom felt like she was walking on eggshells She never knew if she'd trigger Lindsey or push her in the opposite direction She never knew what mood Lindsey was in or what she'd eaten last When she asked questions, it was to gain understanding But Lindsey couldn't give that understanding because she was trying to figure it out herself There was positive intent 9 times out of 10 Even anger or denial often comes from positive intent The Phases of Denial Lindsey was in denial of the disorder Her mom was ALSO in denial that this could happen to her child Her mom was angry - all those feelings were valid and real Being in denial works in many ways on both sides You might not feel "sick enough" but that's not the point Even loved ones go through phases of denial before they can help Hurt People Hurt People This is how pain gets passed on generation after generation Lindsey doesn't want you to just break chains of ED She wants you to break chains FOR your loved ones and yourself Meet anger with kindness and understanding Be compassionate while honoring your path This is hard because we want to be left alone in the disorder Boundaries & Strategies You Can Set: Strategy #1: Use Your Voice Brené Brown says: "When we are busy pleasing and perfecting and performing, we end up saying yes a lot when we mean no." Use your voice Share with people closest to you where you are in your journey Share where you are in your struggle This was the hardest thing - Lindsey didn't share, she just dealt with her own stuff She wasn't ready to share when she was being probed Share if they're SAFE people (this is important) Ask them for support Ask them for what you need from them Why This Matters: If you're a people pleaser, this is hard. But if your support system is trying to fix or please you, they actually NEED something to do. Give them something to do that makes them feel like they're helping. Strategy #2: Have the Hard Conversations Let people in your circle know how they can show up for you in hard times Have those vulnerable moments Lindsey wishes she would have done this Hear them and remain open-minded Let them share their feelings too Strategy #3: Decide Your Boundaries & SHARE Them What to Say: "I know that you care about me, but comments about my food choices right now aren't helpful for my recovery journey" "I appreciate you and I know that you love me, but I'm working with a care team and professionals to help guide my journey and health forward" "I need to heal my relationship with my food, so I'm going to remove myself from any diet conversations or triggering discussions this holiday season because I don't want to absorb that. It's the opposite of what I'm trying to do" Strategy #4: Pre-Plan to Ease Overwhelm As you go into the holiday season with family gatherings and events: Have self-care practices in place Know your go-to's for triggering situations Sometimes this looks like an EXIT STRATEGY Lindsey's Example: Even YEARS after recovering from anorexia, she'd go to Thanksgiving wondering: Are people watching if Lindsay takes the roll? Are they watching if Lindsay has stuffing? If she only has a bite of pie vs. a slice, does that mean she's struggling again? She felt like people were watching her in a fish tank The Truth: That was HER stuff. Even if they ARE watching, you're strong in your decision-making. You're strong in your truth. You know you're for YOU. Strategy #5: Have an Exit Strategy If you're going to be around someone super triggering: Share your voice Speak your truth Be true to you Go with other people BUT if you get super triggered, know that's not going to help you hours or days after Have an EXIT STRATEGY ready It's okay to focus on recovery while participating in traditions Strategy #6: Reflect on Your Growth How am I different this Thanksgiving/Christmas/New Year than last year? How has my mind grown? How has my heart grown? What are my dreams? The Reality: When you're stuck in the disorder, you can't have dreams because it robs you of thinking further along than the current moment. All you can think about is what you can eat next or can't. Strategy #7: Put Yourself Around Understanding People Take care of YOU. Spend time with people who understand where you are. But even if they DON'T understand - boundaries provide healthy structure. The Truth: You're a structure queen. Structure is essential in building anything that lasts and thrives. You've got to have healthy structure. Boundaries = valuing you + bettering you For Loved Ones & Supporters: If You're Supporting Someone With an ED: Your Boundaries Are Just As Important When Lindsey's mom was trying to help, fix, and do all the things - she wasn't taking care of HERSELF She wasn't honoring her own needs She was walking on eggshells worried something she said would set Lindsey off Setting boundaries isn't about pushing that person away That's actually ENABLING them by isolating them more into the disorder What to Say: "I feel like there is something going on with you. I want to support you. I'm seeing changes in you. I want to help you, and right now maybe I don't even know what that looks like, but I just want you to feel seen and loved by me. I want to hold your hand. When you need me - and we all will have that breakdown mode - I'm here." When They Pull Away: Sometimes when somebody pulls away, it means they need space to process. Lindsey's Truth: She knew what her mom was telling her was the truth because she loved and looked up to her. Part of her heart already KNEW. Part of her was searching for someone to say it. But she was feeling all these different feelings. Brain Dump Your Feelings Whether you're the one struggling OR the caretaker - brain dump all those feelings. That's part of healing. Remember: Hurt people hurt people. Key Takeaways: ✨ When your family doesn't understand, it's paralyzing - but love doesn't always know how to show up correctly ✨ Your eating disorder affects EVERYONE close to you, even if it feels isolating ✨ People that love you usually mean well - they're just not sure HOW to mean well ✨ Your family's "attacks" are often their way of coping with fear, denial, and helplessness ✨ Hurt people hurt people - pain gets passed on generation after generation ✨ Use your voice - share where you are with SAFE people and ask for what you need ✨ Boundaries value you and better you - they create space to heal ✨ Have an exit strategy for triggering holiday situations ✨ Pre-plan your self-care practices before family gatherings ✨ Setting boundaries isn't pushing family away - it's creating space you need to heal ✨ Your recovery journey deserves respect and protection ✨ If you're a supporter, your boundaries are just as important ✨ When someone pulls away, they often just need space to process Questions to Reflect On: About Your Family: Does your family understand what you're going through? Do you feel attacked or on defense around them? Have you shared where you are in your journey with safe people? What do you need from them that you haven't asked for? Are you resisting their help because you're not ready? About Your Boundaries: What boundaries do you need to set this holiday season? Have you shared those boundaries clearly? Do you have an exit strategy for triggering situations? What self-care practices do you have in place? Are you putting yourself around understanding people? About Your Growth: How are you different this year than last year? How has your mind grown? How has your heart grown? What are your dreams now? Can you think beyond the current moment? If You're a Supporter: Are you taking care of yourself while supporting your loved one? Are you setting your own boundaries? Are you walking on eggshells worried you'll set them off? Have you asked them what they need instead of assuming? Are you creating space for them to process? Ready to Navigate the Holidays With Support? Don't Face the Holidays Alone If you need support this season because you don't have that support person, or no one understands you, or you feel like no one does - Lindsey doesn't want you to go at this alone. Even with a healthy support system, you should work with somebody who's been there and gone through an eating disorder. Why It Matters: How do we teach our kids to ride a bike if we've never ridden a bike before? It's so important to work with a professional who understands right where you are. How to Get Support: Visit www.herbestself.co to fill out a client application and get on the books for the new year. You deserve to have a wonderful holiday. Focus on setting personal boundaries for yourself AND for your loved ones. Option 1: The Recovery Collective Join Lindsey's group coaching program where you'll get: Community support from women who understand Weekly guidance and tools Accountability for hard days Strategies for stomach triggers and body image struggles Option 2: One-on-One Personalized Coaching work directly with Lindsey for: Custom plan for YOUR triggers and challenges Weekly support and accountability Tools specific to your recovery journey Personal guidance through the hardest moments Learn more about both options at www.herbestself.co You don't have to navigate this alone. Let's walk through recovery together. Connect with Lindsey Website: www.herbestself.co  Private Facebook Community: Her Best Self Society www.herbestselfsociety.com  1:1 Client Applications: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms . Subscribe & Review: If this episode resonated with you—if you saw yourself in Lindsey's rejection story—please subscribe to Her Best Self wherever you listen to podcasts and leave a review. Your reviews help other women who are tired of perfectionism and people-pleasing find this show and realize they're not alone. Share this episode with a friend who needs to hear the truth! About the Host Lindsey Nichol is a former competitive figure skater turned God-led entrepreneur, boy mom, and digital CEO. She understands how core beliefs formed in childhood can create and maintain eating disorder patterns, and she's passionate about helping women identify and transform these beliefs to find lasting freedom. If this episode helped you feel hopeful again and remember your worth isn't found in your body or on your plate, please share it with someone who needs to hear this message. Your support helps more women break the chains of limiting beliefs. *While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Okay girlfriend, we're going there. We're talking about the thing nobody talks about when it comes to eating disorders: sex, intimacy, and what's happening (or NOT happening) in your bedroom. If you've noticed your sex drive has disappeared, you're avoiding intimacy with your partner, you can't be present during sex because you're too busy worrying about what your body looks like, or your relationship is suffering and you don't know why - this episode is for you. Host Lindsey Nichol gets incredibly vulnerable about her own experience with blocked intimacy during her eating disorder - how she was physically shut down, emotionally unavailable, and performing instead of experiencing. She shares the research-backed reasons why eating disorders completely sabotage intimacy (spoiler: your body is literally in survival mode), and gives you practical tools to address it. This isn't just about emotional connection - we're talking about SEX. Physical intimacy. The bedroom. Your relationship with your spouse or partner. Because your eating disorder isn't just stealing your relationship with food and your body. It's stealing your relationship with your partner too. In this episode, you'll learn: The 5 reasons why intimacy gets completely blocked when you have an eating disorder Why your libido has disappeared (hint: hormones, energy, survival mode) How body shame follows you into the bedroom Why you can't experience pleasure when you're disconnected from your body How to check your "intimacy temperature" and get honest about where you are Exactly what to say to your partner about what's going on Practical steps to start reconnecting This is real talk. This is vulnerable. This is the conversation we need to have. So grab your favorite Tarjay journal and let's get into it. Content Note: This episode discusses sexual intimacy and eating disorders openly. Best listened to in a private space. In This Episode, You'll Hear: Lindsey's Vulnerable Truth What intimacy looked like when she was in the thick of her eating disorder Being in a relationship while physically and emotionally shut down Not being present during sex - performing instead of experiencing Constantly worried about what her body looked like during intimacy Anxious thoughts: "Is my stomach flat enough? Can he feel certain parts? Should the lights be off? Should I keep my shirt on?" The realization: She wasn't experiencing intimacy, she was performing it The Research Nobody Talks About Women with eating disorders experience significantly higher rates of sexual dysfunction Lower libido, avoidance of intimacy, relationship dissatisfaction are common We suffer in silence, fake it, avoid it, make excuses And our relationships suffer while we pretend everything is fine The Question We're Answering Why is intimacy blocked when you struggle with an eating disorder? And what can you actually DO about it? The 5 Reasons Why Intimacy Gets Blocked: Reason #1: Your Body is Literally Shutting Down When you restrict food, your body goes into survival mode Sex, reproduction, intimacy are NOT essential for survival Your hormones tank: estrogen, progesterone, testosterone plummet Your libido disappears completely You lose your period (amenorrhea) Your energy is non-existent Research shows women with anorexia and bulimia have significantly disrupted hormone levels All of these hormones impact sexual desire and function If you have zero sex drive, if intimacy feels like a chore, if you're exhausted - your body is saying "I don't have resources for this" Your body is trying to keep you alive, not reproduce Reason #2: You're Disconnected From Your Body When you spend every day hating, criticizing, punishing your body - you disconnect You dissociate from physical sensations The problem: You can't experience pleasure in a body you're not connected to Intimacy requires being IN your body, feeling sensations, being present But when you're trapped in your head analyzing what you look like - you're performing, not experiencing Research: Women with eating disorders report significantly higher body image concerns during sexual activity This directly correlates with lower sexual satisfaction and avoidance behaviors You can't enjoy intimacy when you're worried about appearance the entire time Reason #3: The Shame is Paralyzing Body shame doesn't stay in the mirror - it follows you into the bedroom When you feel disgusting in your own skin, how are you supposed to let someone see it? Touch it? The shame is so heavy that many women avoid intimacy altogether Making excuses, shutting down, pulling away Being vulnerable and exposed when you feel shame about your body is terrifying Intimacy requires vulnerability - shame blocks that completely Reason #4: You're Emotionally Unavailable When you're consumed by an eating disorder, there's no room for anything else Your entire mental and emotional bandwidth is taken up by food thoughts, body checking, planning, restricting, compensating You don't have capacity to show up emotionally for your partner Can't connect, can't be present, can't be intimate beyond the physical act Intimacy requires emotional availability When your eating disorder is screaming 24/7, you're not available - you're surviving Reason #5: Control Issues Prevent Vulnerability Eating disorders are about CONTROL Intimacy requires letting GO of control, being vulnerable, surrendering If you can't let go of control long enough to eat without anxiety, how can you surrender during intimacy? The same rigidity and need for control with food shows up in the bedroom It blocks true intimacy completely The Impact on Your Relationship: What This Means: Distance and disconnection in your relationship Your partner might feel rejected, confused, helpless They might think you're not attracted to them anymore They might think they did something wrong You feel guilty, broken, like you're failing at one more thing "I can't do anything right - not food, not my body, and now not my relationship" The Truth You Need to Hear: This is not a personal failure. This is a SYMPTOM of your eating disorder. Just like: Restriction is a symptom Body checking is a symptom Blocked intimacy is a symptom The Hope: Research shows that as women recover from eating disorders, sexual function, desire, and satisfaction improve SIGNIFICANTLY. Recovery doesn't just give you food freedom - it gives you intimacy freedom too. If your relationship is suffering, recovery is the answer. Not just for food. Not just for your body. But for your relationship too. What You Can Do About It (6 Action Steps): Step 1: Check Your Intimacy Temperature Get honest with yourself. On a scale of 1-10, where is your intimacy RIGHT NOW? Not where you think it should be. Not where it used to be. Where is it TODAY? Ask yourself: Am I avoiding intimacy? Am I going through the motions? Am I anxious the entire time? Am I emotionally checked out? Is my libido non-existent? Am I making excuses to avoid it? Get real about what's actually happening. You can't change what you won't acknowledge. Step 2: Recognize This is an ED Symptom Stop blaming yourself. Stop thinking you're broken or wrong or failing. This blocked intimacy is a SYMPTOM of your eating disorder. Your body is depleted. Your hormones are disrupted. You're disconnected. You're consumed. This isn't about: Not loving your partner enough Being inadequate Being broken Personal failure This is about your eating disorder stealing one MORE thing from you. Name it for what it is: An eating disorder symptom. Step 3: Bring It Into the Light - Talk to Your Partner This is the scariest step, but it's the most important. You have to talk to your spouse or partner about what's going on. When to Have This Conversation: NOT in the moment NOT during intimacy In a calm, safe space where you can be honest What to Say (Script): "Hey, I need to talk to you about something that's been hard for me. I've been struggling with my relationship with food and my body, and it's affecting our intimacy. I want you to know it has nothing to do with you or how I feel about you. My body is depleted, my hormones are off, and I'm having a hard time being present. I'm working on it, but I need you to know what's going on." You Don't Need: All the answers A complete plan To have everything figured out You Just Need: To be honest about what's happening To help them understand it's not about them To let them in instead of shutting them out Step 4: Start Small With Reconnection You don't have to fix everything overnight. Start somewhere small. Ideas: Physical touch that's NOT sexual - holding hands, cuddling, hugging Reconnecting with non-sexual physical intimacy first Being honest when you're not in the mood instead of forcing it or avoiding it Working on being present - staying in your body during intimacy instead of in your head Taking pressure off yourself and your partner Just start. Somewhere. Anywhere. Step 5: Work on Body Acceptance You don't have to LOVE your body to be intimate. But you do have to accept that your body is allowed to: Exist Be touched Experience pleasure Take up space This is work: Therapy work Coaching work Recovery work Daily practice work The more you work on accepting your body (not loving it, just ACCEPTING it), the more available you'll be for intimacy. Step 6: Prioritize Your Recovery If you want intimacy back in your relationship, you MUST prioritize recovery. Because the eating disorder is the blocker. What This Looks Like: Get support (coach, therapist, dietitian) Join a community Do the work of nourishing your body Work through the shame Address the control issues Heal the disconnection Recovery gives you: Food freedom Body peace Your relationship back Intimacy freedom Key Takeaways: ✨ Your ED isn't just stealing food freedom - it's stealing intimacy too ✨ Blocked intimacy is a SYMPTOM, not a personal failure ✨ Your body is in survival mode - sex is not a priority when you're starving ✨ You can't experience pleasure in a body you're disconnected from ✨ Body shame follows you into the bedroom and paralyzes intimacy ✨ You're emotionally unavailable because the ED consumes all your bandwidth ✨ Control issues with food show up as control issues with intimacy ✨ Research shows recovery improves sexual function, desire, and satisfaction ✨ You need to talk to your partner - bring it into the light ✨ Start small: reconnect with non-sexual touch first ✨ Body acceptance (not love) opens the door to intimacy ✨ Recovery gives you your relationship back Powerful Quotes from This Episode: "Let me just be really honest with you. When I was in the thick of my eating disorder, intimacy was one of the first things to go" "I wasn't experiencing intimacy. I was performing it. And I was anxious the entire time" "Research shows that women with eating disorders experience significantly higher rates of sexual dysfunction, lower libido, avoidance of intimacy, and relationship dissatisfaction" "But we don't talk about it. We suffer in silence. We fake it. We avoid it. We make excuses" "When you're restricting food, your body goes into survival mode. And guess what's not essential for survival? Sex. Reproduction. Intimacy" "You can't experience pleasure in a body you're not connected to" "Intimacy requires you to be IN your body. But when you're trapped in your head analyzing what you look like - you're performing" "Body shame doesn't stay in the mirror. It follows you into the bedroom" "When you're consumed by an eating disorder, there's no room for anything else" "Eating disorders are about control. And intimacy requires letting go of control" "This is not a personal failure. This is a symptom of your eating disorder" "Recovery doesn't just give you food freedom - it gives you intimacy freedom too" "If your relationship is suffering, recovery is the answer" "You can't change what you won't acknowledge" "Stop blaming yourself. This blocked intimacy is a SYMPTOM" "You don't have to have all the answers. You just have to be honest about what's happening" "You don't have to love your body to be intimate. But you do have to accept it" "Your eating disorder has stolen enough from you. Don't let it steal your intimacy too" Research-Backed Information: Sexual Dysfunction & Eating Disorders: Women with eating disorders experience significantly higher rates of sexual dysfunction Lower libido is common across all ED types Avoidance of intimacy and relationship dissatisfaction are prevalent Hormone Disruption: Women with anorexia and bulimia have significantly disrupted hormone levels Estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone all tank during restriction These hormones directly impact sexual desire and function Amenorrhea (loss of period) is common and signals reproductive system shutdown Body Image During Sex: Women with EDs report significantly higher body image concerns during sexual activity Body image concerns during sex directly correlate with lower sexual satisfaction This creates avoidance behaviors and performance anxiety Recovery Improves Everything: As women recover from eating disorders, sexual function improves Desire returns as hormones regulate Satisfaction increases as body acceptance grows Recovery restores intimacy capacity Questions to Reflect On: About Your Intimacy: On a scale of 1-10, where is your intimacy right now? Are you avoiding intimacy? How often? Are you going through the motions or truly present? What are you thinking about during intimacy? (Your body? His reaction? What you look like?) When did intimacy start feeling like a chore instead of connection? About Your Body: Do you insist on lights off? Shirt on? Certain positions only? Are you disconnected from physical sensations during sex? Can you feel pleasure or are you too in your head? What body parts are you most self-conscious about during intimacy? About Your Partner: Have you talked to them about what's going on? Do they know you're struggling with an eating disorder? Do they understand why intimacy has changed? Are you making excuses or being honest? About Your Recovery: Is blocked intimacy motivation for you to prioritize recovery? What would it mean to get intimacy back in your relationship? Are you willing to do the work to heal this area too? What's one small step you can take today? Who This Episode Is For: This episode is essential listening if you: Have noticed your sex drive has completely disappeared Avoid intimacy with your partner or spouse Go through the motions but aren't present during sex Can't stop thinking about what your body looks like during intimacy Insist on lights off, shirt on, or specific positions to hide your body Feel anxious or panicked about being intimate Make excuses to avoid sex Feel guilty about avoiding your partner Feel broken or like you're failing at your relationship Have a partner who feels rejected or confused Want to understand WHY this is happening Need practical tools to start reconnecting Are married or in a long-term relationship Are ready to bring this into the light and talk about it Want your relationship back Need to know recovery can restore intimacy The Conversation Starter (What to Say): The Script: "Hey, I need to talk to you about something that's been hard for me. I've been struggling with my relationship with food and my body, and it's affecting our intimacy. I want you to know it has nothing to do with you or how I feel about you. My body is depleted, my hormones are off, and I'm having a hard time being present. I'm working on it, but I need you to know what's going on." Why This Works: Acknowledges there's a problem Takes responsibility without self-blame Reassures your partner it's not about them Explains the physical reality (hormones, depletion) Shows you're working on it Opens the door for support What Happens Next: They might have questions They might be relieved you're talking about it They might not fully understand (and that's okay) The important thing is you brought it into the light Important Truths About Intimacy & EDs: Your Libido Disappearing is NOT Your Fault: It's biology. Your body is in survival mode. Sex is not essential for survival. Your hormones are disrupted. This is a symptom. You're Not Broken: Your body is responding exactly as it should to starvation and restriction. This is protective, not defective. Your Partner Isn't the Problem: Even if you're attracted to them, your body can't prioritize sexual function right now. This isn't about attraction. Shame is the Enemy: The shame you feel about your body during intimacy is what's blocking connection. The body itself isn't the problem - the shame is. Recovery Restores Everything: This isn't permanent. As you nourish your body, your hormones will regulate. Your libido will return. Your ability to be present will come back. Intimacy can be restored. You Deserve Intimacy: Even with an eating disorder, you deserve connection, pleasure, and intimacy. But you have to do the recovery work to get there. Ready for Support? Work with Lindsey One-on-One: If you're ready to prioritize your recovery - not just for food freedom, but for your relationship too - Lindsey offers personalized recovery coaching where you work through: The food piece The body image piece The relationship piece The intimacy piece ALL of it Your relationship deserves you showing up fully. Your partner deserves you being present. YOU deserve to experience intimacy without shame, anxiety, or the ED blocking it. Recovery gives you that. And Lindsey is here to help you get there. Ready for Support? Option 1: The Recovery Collective Join Lindsey's group coaching program where you'll get: Community support from women who understand Weekly guidance and tools Accountability for hard days Strategies for stomach triggers and body image struggles Option 2: One-on-One Personalized Coaching work directly with Lindsey for: Custom plan for YOUR triggers and challenges Weekly support and accountability Tools specific to your recovery journey Personal guidance through the hardest moments Learn more about both options at www.herbestself.co You don't have to navigate this alone. Let's walk through recovery together. Connect with Lindsey Website: www.herbestself.co  Private Facebook Community: Her Best Self Society www.herbestselfsociety.com  1:1 Client Applications: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms . Subscribe & Review: If this episode resonated with you—if you saw yourself in Lindsey's rejection story—please subscribe to Her Best Self wherever you listen to podcasts and leave a review. Your reviews help other women who are tired of perfectionism and people-pleasing find this show and realize they're not alone. Share this episode with a friend who needs to hear the truth! About the Host Lindsey Nichol is a former competitive figure skater turned God-led entrepreneur, boy mom, and digital CEO. She understands how core beliefs formed in childhood can create and maintain eating disorder patterns, and she's passionate about helping women identify and transform these beliefs to find lasting freedom. If this episode helped you feel hopeful again and remember your worth isn't found in your body or on your plate, please share it with someone who needs to hear this message. Your support helps more women break the chains of limiting beliefs. *While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Girlfriend, if you're struggling with self-worth, feeling like you'll never measure up, or can't separate yourself from your eating disorder - this episode is for you. Host Lindsey Nichol shares an incredibly vulnerable and inspiring episode about finding worth from within and discovering your true identity beyond the eating disorder. After a powerful moment during yoga listening to Lauren Daigle's "You Say," Lindsey was reminded of a truth that changed everything: You are not your eating disorder. Your true, authentic self lives underneath all of that. In this encouraging episode, Lindsey walks you through: Why eating disorders consume our identity over time How to separate yourself from the disorder The trap of measuring your worth by external things (weight, appearance, achievements, others' opinions) A beautiful self-compassion exercise you can do right now when you feel unworthy How to cultivate self-acceptance and kindness toward yourself The difference between your false identity (the ED) and your true identity (who you really are) This isn't just inspiration - this is an invitation to remember who you are beyond the eating disorder. To find worth from within. To practice self-compassion on the hard days. And to stop settling for a false version of yourself. If you're having a down day or need encouragement, grab your favorite Tarjay journal and let's sit together. You are worthy just because you are. In This Episode, You'll Hear: The Yoga Moment: Lauren Daigle's "You Say" How Lindsey was practicing yoga with Christian music When Lauren Daigle's song "You Say" came on and brought all the feels The powerful lyrics about fighting voices that say "I'm not enough" How the song speaks about finding worth and identity The theme of surrender: laying failures and victories at God's feet Why Lindsey encourages everyone (Christian or not) to listen to this song The Worth Trap: Measuring Yourself by External Things How people struggling with eating disorders tie worth to external factors The trap: worth measured by weight, appearance, achievements, what others think Why this gives temporary relief but not lasting joy How it leaves you feeling you'll never measure up or be enough The cycle of seeking external validation that never satisfies Identity Consumed: You Are Not Your Eating Disorder The truth: Eating disorders consume our identity over time In order to truly heal, we must separate ourselves from the disorder Your true, authentic, best self is NOT the voice on repeat in your mind That voice saying you're not enough, you'll never measure up, you're weak - that's the ED, not you Your real self, your warrior self, your champion self lives underneath The false identity vs. the true identity Finding Worth From Within (And Above) Your identity must be rooted in who you are at your core Your journey to internal worth is filtered by false identity right now Your true, authentic identity lives underneath all of that You're worthy just because you ARE - you cannot earn it For those with faith: trusting that God has you right where you are For everyone: your worth is inherent, not earned Creating Awareness: The Identity Shift How to become aware that you are not your eating disorder Observing the difference between your thoughts and the ED's thoughts Getting in community with people who support and build you up Listening to music that reminds you of truth Investing in yourself and seeking support (coaching, therapy, community) The importance of separating yourself from the disorder voice The Self-Compassion Research Kristin Neff: world-leading expert on self-compassion Research on self-compassion's impact on positive mental health What self-compassion means: treating yourself with love and understanding Even when life is full of pain and failure, choosing kind words over criticism Choosing to stop judging yourself and start honoring yourself Leaning into believing there is more for you Mindful Awareness Practice Eating disorders are framed around exaggerated, negative beliefs The ability to observe negative thoughts with clarity and openness Learning that feelings and thoughts aren't truths - they're just feelings and thoughts It's okay to not feel enough in this moment - that doesn't mean you aren't enough This moment doesn't define your forever The land of "not knowing what to do next" is temporary The Self-Compassion Exercise: Hand Over Heart A guided practice you can do right now (or come back to) Think of your biggest challenge - the thing you're most terrified of Place your hand over your heart Feel the warmth, the touch, the beat Acknowledge: You're human. You're here. You have purpose. You're worthy just because Let the heaviness of the challenge be there - don't fight it Breathe in, breathe out the heaviness Talk to yourself with compassion: "This is just a season" Validate the hard: "This moment is so hard. This day is so much. I'm scared" Let the feeling sit, then breathe it out - it's temporary Offer kindness as you would to your best friend or daughter "I can do hard things. I can embrace the journey. Maybe this is exactly where I need to be" The Truth About Your Worth You're not designed for everyone to like you You're not designed for everyone to find you worthy You're not designed to pull up a chair to everybody's table There is a radical need for YOUR uniqueness in this world When external factors weigh on you, it's a trap giving temporary relief Stop signing up for it. Stop settling for this version of life This isn't your authentic self. You're designed for more Healing means choosing YOU daily What You're Worth You're worth finding what makes you tick You're worth finding what foods you enjoy again You're worth stepping into the unknown with grace You're worth knowing, loving, and living Don't spend one more day believing you're unworthy ALL of you is worth it Key Takeaways: ✨ You are not your eating disorder - your true self lives underneath the disorder ✨ Eating disorders consume identity over time - healing requires separating yourself from the disorder ✨ Worth measured by external things is a trap - weight, appearance, achievements, others' opinions don't define you ✨ You're worthy just because you ARE - you cannot earn worth, it's inherent ✨ The voice on repeat is not YOU - that critical voice is the eating disorder, not your true self ✨ Self-compassion is research-backed - Kristin Neff's work shows its impact on mental health ✨ Feelings and thoughts aren't truths - they're temporary, not facts ✨ It's okay to not feel enough right now - this moment doesn't mean you aren't enough ✨ Your true identity lives underneath - beyond the false identity of the eating disorder ✨ Healing means choosing you daily - and that's okay, that's the work ✨ You're designed for more - there's a radical need for your uniqueness in this world Powerful Quotes from This Episode: From Lauren Daigle's "You Say": "I keep fighting voices in my mind that say I'm not enough" "Every single lie that tells me that I will never measure up" "You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing" "You say I am strong when I think I am weak" "You say I am held when I am falling short" "In you I find my worth, in you I find my identity" From Lindsey: "Eating disorders consume our identity, and in order to truly heal from them, we have to separate ourselves from the disorder" "You are so trapped in the eating disorder that your worth is tied to your weight, your appearance, what other people think about you, your achievements" "This trap gives you temporary relief and temporary control, but it's not lasting joy" "Your identity has to become so rooted in who you actually are at your core" "Your true, authentic identity lives underneath all of that" "You're worthy just because you are. You cannot earn it" "You are not the eating disorder. You observe" "The voice on repeat in your mind saying you're not enough - that's not your true self" "This is just a season. This is how I want you to talk to you" "This moment is so hard. This day is so much. I'm scared to death. Let that feeling sit there, then breathe it out" "It is just a temporary emotion" "When you challenge and change what's inside of you, everything changes around you" "You are not designed for everyone to like you. You are not designed for everyone to find you worthy" "There is a radical need for your uniqueness in this world" "This is just a trap that is giving you temporary relief. Stop signing up for it" "This isn't your authentic self. You're designed for more" "Healing just means that you're choosing you, and yes you're gonna have to do that on the daily" "You are worth finding. You're worth loving. You're worth living" "Your true and authentic self lies underneath it. We're gonna go on a quest to find out more about her" The Self-Compassion Exercise (Step-by-Step): Step 1: Identify Your Biggest Challenge Think about your biggest challenge right now - the one thing you're most terrified of. Maybe it's weight gain, taking the next step, letting go of control, being honest, or something else. Name it. Step 2: Place Your Hand Over Your Heart If you're able (not driving or operating machinery), place your hand over your heart. Feel: The warmth of your hand The touch against your chest The beat - the thump of your heart Your humanness. You're here. You're alive. Step 3: Acknowledge Your Worth Say to yourself: "I'm human" "I'm here" "I have purpose" "I'm worthy just because" Step 4: Let the Heaviness Be Acknowledge that the challenge feels super heavy. That's not wrong. That's not bad. It just IS. Allow it to be there. Allow the feeling of heaviness. Let it wash over you. Step 5: Breathe Breathe in deeply. Then breathe out the heaviness. This is just a season. Step 6: Talk to Yourself with Compassion Say these words to yourself: "This is just a season when I'm feeling not enough" "This is just a season when I'm feeling stuck" "This moment is so hard. This day is so much" "I'm scared to death" (name the specific fear) "I feel miserable and alone" Let that feeling sit there. Don't push it away. Step 7: Breathe It Out Breathe in. Exhale it out. It is just a temporary emotion. This moment is not permanent. Step 8: Practice Self-Compassion Tell yourself: "This is okay. This is just a season" "This is teaching me about my worth" "This is an experience, an experiment, an observation" "I am learning through this process" "So many people struggle with this - I'm not alone" "I'm human" Step 9: Offer Kindness As though you're speaking to your best friend or your daughter: "I can do hard things" "I can learn to embrace the journey" "I can lean into fear" "Maybe this is exactly where I need to be right now" Step 10: Remember the Truth When you challenge and change what's inside of you, everything changes around you. The Kristin Neff Self-Compassion Research: Who is Kristin Neff? Recognized worldwide as a leading expert on self-compassion and its impact on positive mental health and psychology. What is Self-Compassion? Treating yourself with love and understanding Even in circumstances full of pain and failure Choosing careful words over criticisms Choosing to stop judging yourself Leaning into honoring, nourishing, believing there is more for you Why It Matters in Recovery: Ties into mindful thoughts and awareness Helps you observe negative thoughts and emotions with clarity and openness Teaches you that feelings and thoughts aren't truths - they're just feelings and thoughts Helps separate the eating disorder thoughts from your true thoughts The Connection: Eating disorders are framed around exaggerated, glamorized negative beliefs. Self-compassion creates the space to observe these beliefs without identifying with them. Questions to Reflect On: About Your Identity: Can you separate yourself from your eating disorder? What does your "true self" look like underneath the disorder? When did the eating disorder start consuming your identity? Who are you beyond the eating disorder voice? About Your Worth: What external things are you using to measure your worth? (weight, appearance, achievements, others' opinions) Have these ever given you lasting satisfaction? Can you accept that you're worthy just because you ARE? What would change if you believed you couldn't earn or lose your worth? About Self-Compassion: How do you talk to yourself when things are hard? Would you talk to your best friend or daughter the way you talk to yourself? Can you offer yourself kindness even when life doesn't make sense? What would it feel like to treat yourself with love and understanding? About Your Uniqueness: What makes you uniquely YOU? What did you enjoy before the eating disorder consumed your identity? When's the last time you laughed or did something purely for joy? When's the last time you did something because you enjoyed it, not out of fear or obligation? The Big Questions: What is your biggest challenge right now? What are you most terrified of? What's one thing you can do today to choose yourself? Ready for Support? Option 1: The Recovery Collective Join Lindsey's group coaching program where you'll get: Community support from women who understand Weekly guidance and tools Accountability for hard days Strategies for stomach triggers and body image struggles Option 2: One-on-One Personalized Coaching work directly with Lindsey for: Custom plan for YOUR triggers and challenges Weekly support and accountability Tools specific to your recovery journey Personal guidance through the hardest moments Learn more about both options at www.herbestself.co You don't have to navigate stomach hate alone. Let's walk through this together. Connect with Lindsey Website: www.herbestself.co  Private Facebook Community: Her Best Self Society www.herbestselfsociety.com  1:1 Client Applications: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms . Subscribe & Review: If this episode resonated with you—if you saw yourself in Lindsey's rejection story—please subscribe to Her Best Self wherever you listen to podcasts and leave a review. Your reviews help other women who are tired of perfectionism and people-pleasing find this show and realize they're not alone. Share this episode with a friend who needs to hear that her rejection story can become her redemption story. About the Host Lindsey Nichol is a former competitive figure skater turned God-led entrepreneur, boy mom, and digital CEO. She understands how core beliefs formed in childhood can create and maintain eating disorder patterns, and she's passionate about helping women identify and transform these beliefs to find lasting freedom. If this episode helped you feel hopeful again and remember your worth isn't found in your body or on your plate, please share it with someone who needs to hear this message. Your support helps more women break the chains of limiting beliefs. *While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

"Lindsey, I hate my stomach. I can't stop thinking about it. It's ruining my day, my mood, my recovery. What do I do?" If your stomach is your biggest trigger in recovery - if you can't stop looking at it, obsessing over whether it looks bigger, spiraling every time you see your reflection - this episode is for you, girlfriend. Host Lindsey Nichol gets real about stomach hate in recovery and shares something her client needed to hear today: "I may not love my stomach every day, but if I'm being honest? I didn't love my stomach every day when I was in the trenches of my eating disorder either." So here's the question: Which hard do you want? Hard #1: Hating your stomach while you're restricting, obsessing, body checking, over-exercising, and missing your life. Hard #2: Sometimes not loving your stomach, but being FREE. Living your life. Eating with family. Being present. Having energy. Both are hard. But only one leads to freedom. In this episode, Lindsey shares her own stomach struggles - how she used to search for evidence it was "blowing up," how it would send her into spirals of restriction and over-exercise, and what she does NOW on the days when she doesn't love her stomach. Plus, she gives you 7 practical tools you can use on your hardest days. This is real talk with practical help. No toxic positivity. No "just love yourself." Just honest truth and actionable tools for when your stomach triggers you. In This Episode, You'll Hear: Lindsey's Stomach Story: The Disorder Days How she was super conscious of her stomach feeling or looking bigger Searching for evidence it was "blowing up" - every mirror, reflection, window The spirals: restriction, over-exercise, mood switches Feeling out of control and reacting - being short or avoidant with loved ones How stomach hate controlled her entire day, every day The Truth Bomb: Choose Your Hard Hard #1: Hating your stomach while trapped in the eating disorder Hard #2: Sometimes not loving your stomach but being FREE The reality: Even at her lowest weight, Lindsey STILL didn't love her stomach The question: What other options do you have? Why you have to choose which hard you want to live with Why the Stomach Specifically? Why the stomach is such an easy target for self-criticism How society and social media have trained us to hate our stomachs Why the stomach becomes the "safe" target instead of dealing with real feelings The truth: Restriction makes stomach issues WORSE (digestion, bloating) Reality check: Stomachs are SUPPOSED to change throughout the day Aren't stomachs supposed to be FULL? That's their job What Lindsey Does NOW on Hard Days Wears baggy clothes, not restrictive clothing Avoids opportunities to stare in the mirror and body check Reminds herself of the truth: stomachs are allowed to change Thinks about her little girl self who never cared about her stomach Remembers being pregnant and LOVING watching her stomach grow Accepts that not loving her stomach doesn't mean she's failed The Shift That Changed Everything The realization: She was NEVER going to like her stomach at any size or weight Her stomach wasn't the problem - it was a tool for self-sabotage Used stomach hate when feeling out of control or "not enough" The only way through was acceptance and perspective shift Understanding that stomach hate is usually about something else entirely 7 Tools for Your Hardest Days Stop the Body Checking - Walk away from mirrors, put on baggy clothes Ask the Real Question - What am I really feeling? What am I avoiding? Function Over Form - Your stomach digests food, that's its job Remember Your Little Girl Self - You didn't care about your stomach as a kid Choose Your Hard - Trapped and hating it OR free and sometimes not loving it Wear Comfortable Clothes - Stop punishing yourself with restrictive clothing Talk Back to the Voice - "My stomach is allowed to change and that's okay" Key Takeaways: ✨ You didn't love your stomach in the disorder either - so what are you really choosing? ✨ There are two hards: choose yours - trapped with stomach hate OR free with occasional stomach discomfort ✨ Your stomach is not the problem - it's a symptom, a distraction from real feelings ✨ Restriction makes stomach issues WORSE - bloating, digestion problems increase with restriction ✨ Stomachs are supposed to change - throughout the day, after meals, when sitting vs standing ✨ The stomach is an easy target - easier to hate your stomach than deal with underlying fears ✨ You'll never be satisfied at any size - if stomach hate is really about control and self-sabotage ✨ Body checking makes it worse - the more you look, the more you spiral ✨ Function over form - your stomach's job is to digest food, not be flat 24/7 ✨ Little girl you didn't care - the goal isn't loving your stomach, it's living without it controlling you ✨ You don't have to love it to live - freedom doesn't require stomach love, just stomach acceptance Powerful Quotes from This Episode: "I may not love my stomach every day, but if I'm being honest? I didn't love my stomach every day when I was in the trenches of my eating disorder either" "Your stomach is a huge pain point in recovery. I get it. I've been there. It's real, it's valid, and it's one of the hardest parts" "I would search - like literally SEARCH - for evidence that it was blowing up" "My mood would switch on a dime. I'd feel totally out of control" "Your stomach doesn't have to control you. It doesn't have to dictate your mood, your choices, or your day" "Both are hard. But which hard do you want?" "Even at my lowest weight, I STILL didn't love my stomach. Even then. Even at my sickest" "So what other options do you have? Stay in the disorder and hate your stomach, or recover and sometimes not love it but have your LIFE back" "The stomach is easy for us to tear ourselves apart over" "Restriction makes stomach issues WORSE. When you're not eating enough, your digestion slows down. You get more bloated" "Aren't stomachs supposed to be full? That's their job. To hold food. To digest. To nourish you" "I was never going to like my stomach. No matter my size. No matter my weight" "Hating my stomach wasn't actually about my stomach. It was just a part of me that I used to self-sabotage when I felt out of control or not enough" "When you hate your stomach, ask yourself: What am I really afraid of right now?" "99% of the time, it's not actually your stomach" "You don't have to love your stomach to live your life. You don't have to love your stomach to recover" "Your stomach is not the enemy. Your stomach is just a stomach. It's allowed to exist. It's allowed to change. It's allowed to be full" "Choose your hard, girlfriend. Choose freedom" The 7 Tools Explained: Tool #1: Stop the Body Checking When you feel the urge to look in the mirror, pull your shirt tight, or analyze your stomach - STOP. Literally stop. Walk away. Do something else. Put on baggy clothes. The more you body check, the worse the obsession gets. Tool #2: Ask the Real Question Stop asking "Why does my stomach look like this?" and start asking "What am I really feeling right now? What am I avoiding?" Get to the root. Your stomach is almost never the actual problem. Common real feelings underneath stomach hate: Feeling out of control in some area of life Fear about something coming up Feeling "not enough" in comparison to others Anxiety about a situation Avoiding deeper emotional work Tool #3: Function Over Form Remind yourself: Your stomach digests food. It nourishes you. It expands when you eat because that's its JOB. It's not supposed to be flat 24/7. That's not realistic, healthy, or even possible. Tool #4: Remember Your Little Girl Self You didn't care about your stomach as a kid. You just lived. You played. You ate. You didn't analyze your body. THAT is the goal - not loving your stomach every day, just LIVING without it controlling you. Also remember: When you were pregnant (if applicable), you LOVED watching your stomach grow. You celebrated what your body could do. Why do you hate it now? Tool #5: Choose Your Hard On the hard days, say this out loud: "I can hate my stomach and be trapped in restriction, obsession, and isolation - OR I can sometimes not love my stomach but be FREE to live my life. Which hard do I want?" Tool #6: Wear Comfortable Clothes Stop punishing yourself with restrictive clothing. Stop wearing things that make you hyper-aware of your stomach all day. Wear what feels good. Your comfort matters more than how your stomach looks. Baggy clothes aren't "giving up" - they're choosing peace. Tool #7: Talk Back to the Voice When that critical voice says "Your stomach is too big," you talk back with truth: "My stomach is allowed to change" "My stomach is doing its job" "My stomach does not define my worth" "I didn't love my stomach at my lowest weight either, so this isn't about size" "Stomachs are supposed to be full" Questions to Reflect On: About Your Stomach Hate: When did you first start hating your stomach? What do you do when you hate your stomach? (body check, restrict, over-exercise, avoid people?) Does hating your stomach actually solve anything? Did you love your stomach at your lowest weight? (Be honest) About the Real Feelings: What are you REALLY feeling when you hate your stomach? What are you avoiding by focusing on your stomach? When does stomach hate show up most? (after meals, stressful situations, comparison moments?) What would happen if you couldn't focus on your stomach anymore - what would you have to deal with? About Your Choices: Which hard do you want: trapped and hating it OR free and sometimes not loving it? What is stomach hate costing you? (relationships, experiences, peace, presence?) What would change if your stomach wasn't your focus anymore? Are you ready to stop letting your stomach control your life? About Your Little Girl Self: When was the last time you thought about your body the way you did as a little girl? What would little-girl-you think about how much time you spend hating your stomach? What did you do with your time before stomach hate consumed you? Who This Episode Is For: This episode is essential listening if you: Hate your stomach and it's ruining your recovery Can't stop body checking your stomach throughout the day Search for "evidence" your stomach is getting bigger Spiral into restriction or over-exercise when you hate your stomach Let your stomach dictate your mood, choices, and entire day Feel triggered by your stomach after every meal Compare your stomach to everyone else's Thought you'd love your stomach in recovery but you don't Feel like your stomach is the one body part you can't accept Need real talk and practical tools, not toxic positivity Are stuck between hating your stomach in the disorder vs. sometimes not loving it in freedom Need permission to not love your stomach but live your life anyway Important Truths About Stomachs in Recovery: Stomachs Change Throughout the Day: Flatter in the morning Fuller after meals Different when sitting vs. standing Bloated sometimes (especially in recovery) This is NORMAL and HEALTHY Restriction Makes It Worse: Slows digestion Increases bloating Creates more discomfort Makes you MORE obsessed with your stomach Stomach Hate Is Usually About Something Else: Control issues Fear and anxiety Feeling "not enough" Comparison to others Avoiding deeper feelings You Didn't Love It at Your Lowest Weight Either: If you still hated your stomach at your sickest, size isn't the issue Stomach hate is a symptom, not the problem No amount of restriction will make you love it Function Over Form: Your stomach's job is to digest food It's supposed to expand after eating It's supposed to be FULL Flat stomachs 24/7 are not realistic or healthy What Lindsey Does Now (Practical Examples): Morning Routine: Puts on comfortable, baggy clothes first thing Avoids standing in front of mirror analyzing Brushes teeth, does hair, moves on Doesn't give herself opportunity to spiral After Meals: Expects stomach to be fuller - that's its job Reminds herself: "Stomachs are supposed to be full" Doesn't body check or analyze Focuses on how she FEELS, not how she LOOKS On Triggering Days: Acknowledges: "I don't love my stomach today and that's okay" Asks: "What am I really feeling? What's really bothering me?" Remembers: "I didn't love it in the disorder either - choose your hard" Takes action on the real feeling instead of obsessing about stomach Clothing Choices: Wears what feels comfortable, not what's restrictive Doesn't punish herself with tight clothes Chooses outfits that let her focus on living, not analyzing The "Choose Your Hard" Framework: Hard Option #1: Hating Your Stomach While Trapped Constant body checking Restriction and over-exercise Mood swings and irritability Avoiding loved ones Missing life experiences Obsessive thoughts Still hating your stomach anyway Hard Option #2: Sometimes Not Loving It But Being Free Eating meals with family Having energy for life Being present in moments Not spending hours body checking Living without constant obsession Having relationships Experiencing joy Still sometimes not loving your stomach The Question: Which hard do you want? The Truth: You're going to have hard days with your stomach either way. At least in recovery, you get your LIFE back. Ready for Support? Option 1: The Recovery Collective Join Lindsey's group coaching program where you'll get: Community support from women who understand Weekly guidance and tools Accountability for hard days Strategies for stomach triggers and body image struggles Option 2: One-on-One Personalized Coaching work directly with Lindsey for: Custom plan for YOUR triggers and challenges Weekly support and accountability Tools specific to your recovery journey Personal guidance through the hardest moments Learn more about both options at www.herbestself.co You don't have to navigate stomach hate alone. Let's walk through this together. Connect with Lindsey Website: www.herbestself.co  Private Facebook Community: Her Best Self Society www.herbestselfsociety.com  1:1 Client Applications: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms . Subscribe & Review: If this episode resonated with you—if you saw yourself in Lindsey's rejection story—please subscribe to Her Best Self wherever you listen to podcasts and leave a review. Your reviews help other women who are tired of perfectionism and people-pleasing find this show and realize they're not alone. Share this episode with a friend who needs to hear that her rejection story can become her redemption story. About the Host Lindsey Nichol is a former competitive figure skater turned God-led entrepreneur, boy mom, and digital CEO. She understands how core beliefs formed in childhood can create and maintain eating disorder patterns, and she's passionate about helping women identify and transform these beliefs to find lasting freedom. If this episode helped you feel hopeful again and remember your worth isn't found in your body or on your plate, please share it with someone who needs to hear this message. Your support helps more women break the chains of limiting beliefs. *While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Hey sis, here is hope. You can turn your worries and your wishes into your true realities, and you can surely find freedom from the debilitating disease of an eating disorder and disordered eating. In this powerful episode, host Lindsey Nichol speaks truth directly to your heart, spirit, and mind. If you're stuck in the same place year after year - same worries, same wishes, same Thanksgiving anxiety, same holiday struggles - this is your wake-up call. Lindsey reveals why your worries and anxieties can actually HELP you move forward (or keep you stuck in the safe zone), and why your wishes and dreams must become greater than your fears. She introduces her 3-step battle plan for turning wishes into reality: align with your biggest challenge, align with your greatest dream, and study your enemy - that nagging voice keeping you in the cycle. This isn't just another motivational episode. This is a strategic battle plan for warriors ready to stop wishing and start living. Because girlfriend, warriors don't go into battle without a shield, a sword, or a plan. And you're not meant to go alone. If you've been waiting for the "magic pill" to create peace in your life, this episode will show you that YOU have the power to transform everything - starting right now. In This Episode, You'll Learn: Why Worries Can Help You (Or Keep You Stuck) Your worries and anxieties can nudge you toward the future you're dreaming of They can propel you forward on your journey to freedom But they can also keep you stuck in the safe zone if you do nothing about them The difference between productive worry and paralyzing worry Why Wishes Aren't Enough Wishes and dreams are great, but they can keep you stuck too Without action, wishes remain fantasies year after year Life is hard, especially with an eating disorder - but wishes alone won't change that Your wishes must become greater than your worries to create real change The Biggest Challenges Women Face in Recovery When Lindsey asks her one-on-one clients "What is your biggest challenge?" she hears: Fear of weight gain Recovery feels totally impossible "I want to eat the way I should, yet I don't" Anxiety around food Over-exercising and calorie counting Worrying about how others see me Struggling to give up control Rigid routines and bad habits that are hard to break Eating differently than family Decades of disordered relationship with food and body Always relapsing when life happens The Greatest Wishes Women Have When Lindsey asks "What is your greatest wish?" she hears: I want to live life FREE I want to be healthier and better I want to eat "normal" (whatever that is) I want to nourish my body I want to be happy and healthy I want to stop thinking about food constantly I want to eat without fear of weight gain I want to go out to eat and enjoy it without looking at the menu beforehand I want flexibility I want to be present I want to LIVE The Bridge: Freedom IS Your Reality Freedom is possible no matter how you feel right now Feelings aren't forever - they change If you feel stuck year after year, same holidays, same struggles - it's time to stop the madness You have to stop the nagging voice keeping you in the cycle The Hard Truth You Need to Hear YOU have the power to transform your life completely - you, no one else If you had the "magic pill of power" to create peace, would you take it? You have to stop loving the drama of the cycle Your wishes must become GREATER than your worries This only happens when you come PREPARED FOR THE BATTLE Warriors don't go into battle without a shield, sword, or team You need a PLAN and you need to EXECUTE The 3-Step Battle Plan to Turn Wishes Into Reality: Step 1: Get in Alignment with Your Biggest Challenge In order to defeat the enemy, you need a strategy What is your biggest worry? Your biggest challenge? You have to identify it clearly to fight it effectively Be specific - name the fear, the behavior, the thought pattern Step 2: Get in Alignment with Your Greatest Dream What is your biggest wish? Your greatest desire? Close your eyes - where do you see yourself in 1 year? 5 years? Your dream is achievable if you can imagine it This becomes your "why" - what you're fighting FOR Step 3: Study Your Opponent (Your Enemy) How can you fight what you can't see? How can you put in your all when you can't define it? How can you go to battle if you don't know what you're up against? What is your reward when you conquer? Study the enemy like no other: What does that voice inside your head say to you? She's constantly bargaining, right? "You don't need that" / "You can eat later" / "It's too early for a meal" What is she trying to manipulate you with? When you can SEPARATE your thoughts from HER thoughts, you can build your plan of attack Key Takeaways: ✨ Worries can work FOR you or AGAINST you - they can propel you forward or keep you stuck ✨ Wishes without action keep you in the same place - year after year, holiday after holiday ✨ Feelings aren't forever - no matter how stuck you feel right now, it can change ✨ You have to stop loving the drama of the cycle - the cycle only continues if you participate ✨ Your wishes must become GREATER than your worries - this is the tipping point ✨ Warriors don't go into battle unprepared - you need a shield, sword, helmet, and plan ✨ You're not meant to do this alone - going solo into battle is a losing strategy ✨ YOU have the power to transform your life - no one else can do this for you ✨ Freedom is already yours - it's been granted to you, you just have to claim it ✨ Commit to ONE action today - your future self will thank you Powerful Quotes from This Episode: "You can turn your worries and your wishes into your true realities" "Your worries can help you move forward or keep you stuck in the safe zone" "Wishes can keep you stuck if you do nothing about them" "If you feel like year after year you're stuck - Thanksgiving after Thanksgiving, Christmas after Christmas - you have to stop the madness" "Feelings aren't forever, friend. Feelings aren't forever" "You have power to completely transform your life. You. No one else" "If I gave you the magic pill of power to create peace in your life, would you do whatever it took?" "You have to stop loving the drama of the cycle" "Your wishes and dreams have to become GREATER than your worries and anxiety" "You will only find freedom if you become prepared for the battle" "Warriors don't go into battle without a shield. Would you go into battle without a sword? How about going into battle alone?" "Why are you going to battle without a plan or without others fighting with you?" "How can you fight what you can't see? How can you put your all when you can't define it?" "When you can separate your thoughts from HER thoughts, then you can build your plan of attack" "You are a mighty warrior. There is no doubt you're strong" "What are you waiting for? Freedom is yours. It's already been granted to you" "Feelings aren't forever. You are a warrior" "It's time to stop going to battle without a helmet and a sword, and it's time to stop going as if you're going at it alone" Scripture: You Are a Mighty Warrior Zechariah 10:5-12 (paraphrased): You shall be mighty in battle, trampling the foe in the mud of the streets. You shall fight because God is with you and you will put to shame the riders on horses. He will strengthen you. He will save you. He will bring you back because he has compassion for you. And you will be enough. You won't be rejected. For he is God and he will deliver you. You shall become a mighty warrior and your heart will be glad and your children will see it and rejoice. God will whistle for you and gather you in because he is redeeming you and you shall be as you were before. He will bring you home from the desert land and gather you. He will pass through the sea of troubles with you and strike down the waves, and all the depths will dry up. The enemy shall depart. He will make you strong and you shall walk in his name. Questions to Reflect On: About Your Challenges: What is your BIGGEST challenge right now in recovery? What worry keeps you up at night? What anxiety feels heaviest on your shoulders? Be specific - name it, define it, see it clearly About Your Dreams: What is your greatest wish for your life? What is your deepest desire? Why are you here? What do you truly want? If you close your eyes and see yourself in 1 year or 5 years free from this - what does that look like? About Your Enemy: What does that nagging voice say to you? What lies is she constantly telling you? What manipulations does she use to keep you stuck? How does she bargain with you throughout the day? Can you separate YOUR thoughts from HER thoughts? About Your Battle Plan: Do you have a strategy, or are you winging it? Are you going into battle with a shield, sword, and helmet? Are you trying to do this alone? What is ONE action you can take today that your future self will thank you for? The Big Question: What are you waiting for? Connect with Lindsey Website: www.herbestself.co  Private Facebook Community: Her Best Self Society www.herbestselfsociety.com  1:1 Client Applications: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms . Subscribe & Review: If this episode resonated with you—if you saw yourself in Lindsey's rejection story—please subscribe to Her Best Self wherever you listen to podcasts and leave a review. Your reviews help other women who are tired of perfectionism and people-pleasing find this show and realize they're not alone. Share this episode with a friend who needs to hear that her rejection story can become her redemption story. About the Host Lindsey Nichol is a former competitive figure skater turned God-led entrepreneur, boy mom, and digital CEO. She understands how core beliefs formed in childhood can create and maintain eating disorder patterns, and she's passionate about helping women identify and transform these beliefs to find lasting freedom. If this episode helped you feel hopeful again and remember your worth isn't found in your body or on your plate, please share it with someone who needs to hear this message. Your support helps more women break the chains of limiting beliefs. *While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Girlfriend, if you've fallen in your recovery - if you've had a setback, slipped back into old behaviors, or feel like you're not where you "should" be - this episode is for you. This morning, Lindsey was walking her 7-year-old son Blake to school when he fell hard while skipping in Crocs. Through his tears, he looked up and said, "I guess I shouldn't skip so fast to school." And in that moment, Lindsey realized something profound: Sometimes the fall is required. Not because we want to hurt, but because without the fall, we wouldn't learn any other way. In this vulnerable episode, Lindsey shares her own painful fall in recovery - when she was lying to her treatment team, telling everyone she was "doing the things" while secretly still restricting out of fear. Her results weren't matching her actions, and she felt defeated. But that fall? It became her turning point. Drawing from her figure skating background (landing her first double loop took countless falls), Lindsey reveals why falls aren't failures - they're required education. She addresses the shame that comes with relapsing, gives you permission to be right where you are, and shows you how to get back up without beating yourself up. If you've been too afraid to risk falling or too ashamed to get back up, this episode will change everything. In This Episode, You'll Hear: Blake's Fall: The Morning Walk to School How her 7-year-old fell hard while skipping in Crocs The mama moment of dusting him off and helping him up His profound realization: "I guess I shouldn't skip so fast" Why she knew he needed that fall to learn The parallel to recovery that changed her perspective Lindsey's Recovery Fall: The Painful Truth When she was lying to her treatment team about doing "the things" The internal defeat of results not matching actions One side wanting weight gain, the other side feeling betrayed and terrified Beating herself up for not being "further along" The turning point: getting real and honest with herself Why that fall propelled her forward more than smooth sailing ever could The Figure Skating Metaphor: Landing the Double Loop Falling over and over trying to land her first double loop jump How each fall taught her something new (angle, timing, fear, adjustment) Why it became her favorite jump BECAUSE of the falls, not in spite of them The parallel: recovery is learning a jump you've never done before The Shame of Falling in Recovery Why Blake was embarrassed when he fell (other kids watching, teacher saw) The truth: shame isn't about the fall, it's what you make it mean about you Your fall doesn't mean you're a failure, weak, or not worth the effort It just means you're learning Why Lindsey eventually saw her falls as necessary How falls are setups for breakthroughs, not just setbacks You Are Right Where You Need to Be Not where you want to be, but where you need to be You can't skip ahead or bypass the lesson The truth: you can't change what you won't acknowledge You can't heal what you won't feel You can't grow without falling The fall isn't the end of your story - it's the beginning of your breakthrough Key Takeaways: ✨ Sometimes the fall is required - without it, we wouldn't learn any other way ✨ Falls aren't failures, they're required education - each one teaches you something ✨ Shame isn't about the fall - it's about what you're making the fall mean about you ✨ You are right where you need to be - not where you want to be, but exactly where you need to be to learn and grow ✨ You can't change what you won't acknowledge - getting honest is the first step to getting back up ✨ The fall is setup for your breakthrough - not a setback, but preparation for progress ✨ Recovery is learning a jump you've never done before - of course you're going to fall multiple times ✨ Staying stuck is its own kind of fall - it's just slower, more painful, and doesn't teach you anything ✨ You don't have to get up alone - reach out for help, let someone stoop down to your level Powerful Quotes from This Episode: "Sometimes the fall is required. Not because I want you to hurt, but because without the fall, we wouldn't learn any other way" "I guess I shouldn't skip so fast to school" - Blake, age 7 "I was telling everyone I was doing the things, but in reality I wasn't because I was scared" "The results weren't matching my actions and I felt so defeated internally" "One side of me wanted weight gain because I knew I needed it. The other side felt betrayed and terrified" "That fall was my turning point. Once I got real and honest with myself, I could finally do something about it" "I fell SO many times trying to land that double loop. It became my favorite jump not in spite of the falls, but BECAUSE of them" "The falls weren't failures. The falls were required education" "The shame isn't about the fall. The shame is about what you're making the fall mean about you" "Your fall doesn't mean you're a failure. It just means you're learning" "I eventually saw my falls as necessary. I don't think I would have made the progress I made without falling multiple times" "The falls weren't setbacks. They were setups for my breakthrough" "You are right where you need to be. Not where you want to be, but where you need to be" "You can't change what you won't acknowledge. You can't heal what you won't feel. You can't grow without falling" "The fall isn't the end of your story. It's the beginning of your breakthrough" "Recovery isn't about never falling. Recovery is about learning to get back up" "Staying stuck is its own kind of fall. It's just slower, more painful, and doesn't teach you anything" How to Get Back Up After You Fall: Step 1: Stop Beating Yourself Up Stop making the fall mean something about your worth. The fall is data. It's information. It's feedback. It's not a judgment on who you are. Step 2: Get Honest Really honest. With yourself first, then with your treatment team, support system, and your people. Say: "I fell. Here's where I am. Here's what I need." Step 3: Reach Out for Help Just like Lindsey stooped down to Blake's level to dust him off - you don't have to get up alone. In fact, you shouldn't. Let someone help you back up. Step 4: Take the Lesson Forward Blake learned not to skip so fast. What are YOU learning from this fall? What does this fall need to teach you that you couldn't have learned any other way? Step 5: Keep Moving Forward Maybe a little slower. Maybe a little more carefully. Maybe with more honesty this time. But keep going. Because recovery isn't about never falling - it's about learning to get back up. Questions to Reflect On: About Your Falls: Where have you fallen recently in your recovery? What is that fall trying to teach you? Are you making the fall mean something about your worth? Have you gotten honest about where you really are? About Growth: What fall might you need to RISK in order to grow? What must you go through in order to evolve? Are you staying stuck because you're too afraid to risk falling? What lesson can't you learn any other way except through falling? Specific Scenarios: Maybe you've restricted when you said you wouldn't - what is that teaching you about your fear? Maybe you've isolated when you said you'd reach out - what is that teaching you about shame? Maybe you've lied to your treatment team - what is that teaching you about control? The Risk Question: Do you need to risk eating a fear food and falling into discomfort? Do you need to risk being honest and falling into vulnerability? Do you need to risk resting and falling into fear of losing control? Who This Episode Is For: This episode is essential listening if you: Have fallen or relapsed in your ED recovery recently Are lying to your treatment team about what you're really doing Feel ashamed about "falling again" in your recovery Beat yourself up for not being "further along" Think you're a failure because you keep slipping back Are too afraid to risk falling, so you stay stuck Feel defeated because your results don't match your stated actions Need permission to be imperfect in recovery Want to understand why falls are necessary, not shameful Are ready to get honest and finally change Have kids and relate to the parenting/learning moments Are a mom who sees your own journey in your child's lessons Important Truths About Falls in Recovery: Falls Are Not Failures: They're required education. Each fall teaches you something you couldn't learn any other way. The Length of Your Struggle Doesn't Matter: Whether this is your first fall or your hundredth, you can still get back up and keep going. Results Not Matching Actions Is a Sign: It means you're not being fully honest - with yourself or others. That realization IS the breakthrough. You Can't Skip the Lesson: Just like Blake couldn't skip learning to slow down without falling, you can't bypass the lessons recovery requires. Honesty Is the Turning Point: Once you get real about where you are, you can finally do something about it. Blake's Lesson Applied to Your Recovery: Blake was skipping too fast → You might be rushing recovery, trying to do it perfectly Lindsey kept warning him to be careful → Your body, treatment team, loved ones have been giving you signals He fell hard and got hurt → You've had a setback, relapse, or painful realization He reached out for help → You don't have to get up alone - reach out Lindsey stooped to his level → The right support meets you where you are, doesn't shame you She dusted him off → You can clean yourself up and start fresh He learned the lesson → "I shouldn't skip so fast" = awareness leads to change He got back up and kept going to school → You get back up and keep moving toward recovery The Figure Skating Lesson: Just like Lindsey fell countless times before landing her first double loop jump - and it became her favorite jump BECAUSE of all the falls - your recovery falls are teaching you: What angle is wrong (what approach isn't working) What timing is off (maybe you're not ready for this step yet) What fear you're holding onto (what's really keeping you stuck) What adjustment you need to make (how to do it differently next time) And eventually, when you land it, recovery will become your favorite part of your story. Not in spite of the falls, but because of them. Permission Slip: You have permission to: Fall and not be a failure Be right where you are, even if it's on the ground Get honest about lying or hiding Reach out for help getting back up Learn slowly, one fall at a time Be imperfect in your recovery journey Risk falling in order to grow Stop beating yourself up Start fresh today, right now Ready to Get Back Up? If you need support getting back up after a fall, Lindsey has spots open for one-on-one recovery coaching. She'll meet you exactly where you are - no judgment, no shame - and help you find your footing again. Visit www.herbestself.co to book your complimentary consultation. Let's turn your fall into your breakthrough. Connect with Lindsey Website: www.herbestself.co  Private Facebook Community: Her Best Self Society www.herbestselfsociety.com  1:1 Client Applications: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms . Subscribe & Review: If this episode resonated with you—if you saw yourself in Lindsey's rejection story—please subscribe to Her Best Self wherever you listen to podcasts and leave a review. Your reviews help other women who are tired of perfectionism and people-pleasing find this show and realize they're not alone. Share this episode with a friend who needs to hear that her rejection story can become her redemption story. About the Host Lindsey Nichol is a former competitive figure skater turned God-led entrepreneur, boy mom, and digital CEO. She understands how core beliefs formed in childhood can create and maintain eating disorder patterns, and she's passionate about helping women identify and transform these beliefs to find lasting freedom. If this episode helped you feel hopeful again and remember your worth isn't found in your body or on your plate, please share it with someone who needs to hear this message. Your support helps more women break the chains of limiting beliefs. *While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Girlfriend, maybe you've been struggling with disordered eating for decades and you don't want to put your life on hold to go into a full-blown treatment facility. Maybe you have kids at home, aging parents to care for, or a career you can't walk away from. Or maybe you don't even know what options are available, so you just stay stuck thinking you'll manage it all by yourself. Girl, you weren't meant to do this alone. In this episode, host Lindsey Nichol breaks down the 6 different levels of eating disorder treatment and care - from outpatient support to acute medical stabilization - so you can understand what's available and what might be best for YOUR unique situation and life circumstances. Lindsey shares her own treatment journey through IOP and day treatment, and why finding the right level of care that fits your life is so important. Whether you're a busy mom, working woman, caregiver, or someone who simply can't leave home for residential treatment, this episode will help you understand all your options - including recovery coaching as a personalized support option. You deserve a life free from the chains of disordered eating. And it starts with knowing what treatment options are out there. In This Episode, You'll Learn: The 6 Levels of Eating Disorder Treatment: Level 1: Outpatient Care What it is: Weekly sessions with a care team while living at home Who it's for: Those deemed medically stable who need ongoing support What's included: Dietitian, therapist, medical doctor, support groups Best for: Maintaining school, work, family life while getting treatment Level 2: Intensive Outpatient Program (IOP) What it is: Multiple sessions per week in specialized settings Where it happens: Treatment centers or hospitals What's included: Group therapy, individual therapy, structured programming Lindsey's experience: This is where she spent the majority of her recovery Level 3: Partial Hospitalization Program (PHP) / Day Treatment What it is: 5-6 days per week, 6-8 hours per day Structure: More intensive than outpatient, includes meals and therapies What happens: You return home in the evenings Lindsey's experience: Combined with IOP while in school - included therapies and support groups Level 4: Residential Treatment What it is: 24-hour care and supervision (inpatient experience) Who it's for: Those medically stable but requiring intensive support Where it happens: Medical hospitals, centers, or homelike facilities Structure: Full-time structured environment with comprehensive care Level 5: Inpatient Hospitalization What it is: Most appropriate for high-intensity medical/psychiatric needs Structure: 24-hour medical psychiatric facility Who it's for: Those not responding to other treatments, experiencing self-harm, severe depression, or needing intensive medical oversight Level 6: Acute Medical Stabilization What it is: The highest level of critical care for eating disorders Who it's for: Those medically unstable due to severity or medical complications Primary focus: Physical stabilization before moving to other treatment levels Plus: Recovery Coaching as a Treatment Option What it is: One-on-one virtual support for guided accountability and actionable recovery steps Who it's for: Those who can't or won't go into residential but need support How it works: Weekly sessions focused on action, not diagnosis Can be layered: Works alongside therapy, dietitian, and medical care Key Takeaways: ✨ Treatment is personalized - what works for someone else may not work for you, and that's okay ✨ You don't have to choose residential - there are multiple levels of care that allow you to stay home ✨ Recovery is NOT black and white - you can get support at various levels based on your life circumstances ✨ You weren't meant to do this alone - even if you can't go to residential, you need SOME level of support ✨ Everyone's recovery is their own - your journey is unique and valid regardless of which level of care you choose ✨ Recovery coaching is a valid option - especially when layered with other care team members ✨ You owe you, sister - putting yourself first isn't selfish, it's necessary ✨ More options exist now - compared to years ago, there are so many more treatment options available Powerful Quotes from This Episode: "You deserve a life that's free from the chains of disordered eating" "Maybe you don't even know what options are available for you, so you just stay here thinking you're gonna manage it all by yourself" "Everyone's recovery is your recovery. Your journey is your journey" "What's best for you might not be best for me. What worked for me might not work for someone else" "You weren't meant to do life alone. You definitely weren't meant to do the hard things alone" "You owe you, sister" "It's not black and white. There's so many other options" "What matters is that you're standing up for you" "You are worth it. You deserve it" "Everyone else in your life is gonna benefit when you can start putting you first" Important Information About Each Treatment Level: When to Consider Outpatient: You're medically stable You can maintain work/school/family responsibilities You need ongoing support and accountability You're in maintenance or relapse prevention phase When to Consider IOP: You need more structure than weekly appointments You can still live at home You benefit from group support You need multiple therapy modalities When to Consider PHP/Day Treatment: You need daily structure but can return home at night You require meal support You need more intensive care than IOP You're transitioning from residential or preventing residential When to Consider Residential: You need 24-hour support but are medically stable Your home environment isn't supportive of recovery You need complete immersion in treatment Outpatient options haven't been effective When to Consider Inpatient: You're experiencing severe symptoms There's self-harm or suicidal ideation You need medical and psychiatric oversight You require the highest level of structure When to Consider Recovery Coaching: You can't or won't do residential treatment You have kids, aging parents, or career obligations You want actionable support, not diagnosis You're looking for relapse prevention You want to layer support with existing care team What Makes Recovery Coaching Different: Not therapy: Coaches don't diagnose or address trauma - they focus on forward action Accountability structure: Weekly sessions keep you committed to your recovery goals Actionable support: Focused on practical steps like facing fear foods, getting off the scale, eating out with family Virtual and flexible: Fits into busy lives with kids, work, caregiving responsibilities Layered care: Works alongside dietitians, therapists, and medical professionals Relapse prevention: Helps maintain recovery after intensive treatment Questions to Ask When Choosing Treatment: What level of medical stability am I at currently? What are my life circumstances? (Kids, work, caregiving, school) Can I leave home for treatment, or do I need to stay local? What treatment options are available in my area? What does my insurance cover? Do I need 24-hour support or can I manage with weekly sessions? Am I willing to commit to doing the work required at each level? What has or hasn't worked for me in the past? Do I have a support system at home? What does my healthcare team recommend? Action Steps After This Episode: Assess where you are: Are you medically stable? What symptoms are you experiencing? Talk to a healthcare professional: Schedule appointments with your doctor to discuss which level of care is appropriate Research local options: Google treatment centers, IOP programs, PHP programs in your area Consider online options: Virtual recovery coaching, online support groups, telehealth therapy Build your care team: Even if you can't do residential, assemble support (dietitian, therapist, coach, doctor) Stop doing this alone: Commit to getting SOME level of support starting today Reach out: If recovery coaching interests you, visit lindseynickel.com to learn more Who This Episode Is For: This episode is essential listening if you: Don't know what eating disorder treatment options exist Think residential is your only option (and you can't do it) Have been doing this alone and need to know what help is available Are a busy mom, working woman, or caregiver who can't leave home Have been in treatment before and need to know what's next Are researching options for a loved one struggling with disordered eating Want to understand the difference between IOP, PHP, and residential Need permission to choose the treatment level that fits YOUR life Are looking for alternatives to inpatient treatment Want to layer recovery coaching with your existing care team Resources Mentioned: National Alliance for Eating Disorders: Information on treatment levels and resources National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA): Comprehensive treatment information and support Recovery Coaching with Lindsey: One-on-one virtual support, weekly sessions, actionable recovery tools Her Best Self Facebook Community: Support group for women in recovery Important Reminder: Lindsey is NOT a medical professional. The information in this episode is based on her personal experience and education but should not replace consultation with a licensed healthcare professional. Always speak with your doctor, therapist, or treatment team to determine which level of care is most appropriate for your specific situation. Connect with Lindsey Website: www.herbestself.co  Private Facebook Community: Her Best Self Society www.herbestselfsociety.com  Client Applications: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms About the Host Lindsey Nichol is a former competitive figure skater turned God-led entrepreneur, boy mom, and digital CEO. She understands how core beliefs formed in childhood can create and maintain eating disorder patterns, and she's passionate about helping women identify and transform these beliefs to find lasting freedom. If this episode helped you identify the core beliefs feeding your eating disorder, please share it with someone who needs to hear this message. Your support helps more women break the chains of limiting beliefs. *While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Happy Halloween, girlfriend! But let's talk about what's TRULY scary - the lies your eating disorder has been telling you that keep you trapped, paralyzed, and missing out on your life. In this special Halloween episode, host Lindsey Nichol unmasks the 5 scariest stories your eating disorder tells you and reveals why they're complete fiction. If you're a woman over 40 who's been haunted by food fears, candy panic, and the belief that you've been struggling "too long" to ever find freedom, this episode is your wake-up call. Lindsey shares her own triggering Halloween experience - dressing up as a plastic surgery victim in her mid-20s, complete with bandages and circles marking her "imperfections" - and how that costume revealed just how deep her denial really was. Then she walks you through each scary story, debunking the lies and replacing them with truth. This isn't just a Halloween episode. This is permission to finally unmask your eating disorder and step into the freedom you deserve - no matter your age, no matter how long you've been struggling. In This Episode, You'll Learn: Lindsey's Halloween Confession: Why Halloween was always triggering (candy panic, food fear, restriction spirals) The plastic surgery victim costume story that revealed her denial How eating disorders convince you the horror show is normal The moment she realized she was literally wearing her body dysmorphia as a costume The 5 Scary Stories (Lies) Your ED Tells You: Scary Story #1: "If I Eat Candy, I'll Lose All Control" Why restriction and deprivation CREATE the loss of control How scarcity breeds obsession and leads to binging The truth about trusting yourself around "forbidden" foods What you're really missing when you avoid Halloween treats with your family Scary Story #2: "I'll Gain Weight Immediately If I Stop Restricting" Why your body is not a calculator waiting to punish you The truth about initial weight fluctuation during healing How restriction has NEVER given you the body you thought it would What set point really means and why fighting it exhausts you Scary Story #3: "I Can't Trust Myself Around Food" Why you've forgotten what trust feels like after years of external rules How every restriction reinforces the lie that you're not capable What you're modeling for your kids or grandkids when you don't trust yourself The truth: trust is rebuilt one choice at a time Scary Story #4: "Everyone Will Judge Me If I Gain Weight (And So Will I)" The double lie: external judgment + internal harsh critic Why the people who matter want you PRESENT, not perfect What people are actually judging (your obsession, not your body) The scary truth: you're already miserable, the ED isn't protecting you FROM misery Scary Story #5: "I've Been Struggling So Long, I'll Probably Always Be This Way" Why the length of time struggling has NOTHING to do with recovery potential The truth for women in their 40s, 50s, 60s+ finding freedom Why "I wish I had started sooner" means TODAY is your sooner How to stop wasting one more Halloween believing this is your fate The Unmasking: Why you're exhausted from wearing the ED mask How to stop hiding and pretending this is sustainable What it means to take off the costume and show up as your real self The truth about who you are underneath the eating disorder Key Takeaways: ✨ The ED convinces you the horror show is normal - it puts a mask over your eyes so you can't see reality ✨ Fear of losing control actually CREATES loss of control - restriction is what makes you feel out of control ✨ Your body has a set point - fighting against it is what's exhausting you, not the weight itself ✨ You CAN trust yourself - but trust is rebuilt one choice at a time after years of external rules ✨ The people who matter want you present, not perfect - they're judging your obsession, not your body ✨ It's NOT too late - recovery is possible at ANY age after ANY amount of time struggling ✨ You're already miserable - the ED isn't protecting you from misery, it IS the misery ✨ Today is your "sooner" - stop waiting for the perfect time to unmask and get free Powerful Quotes from This Episode: "These aren't the fun kind of scary stories. These are the lies that keep you trapped." "I was literally wearing my body dysmorphia as a costume" "Your fear of losing control is actually what creates the loss of control" "You've spent DECADES restricting and you STILL don't have the body you thought restriction would give you" "You're trading temporary weight fluctuation for permanent freedom - and that's the best trade you'll ever make" "Every time you follow a rule instead of listening to your body, you're telling yourself 'I can't handle freedom'" "The people who matter don't care about your body size. The people who care about your body size don't matter" "You're ALREADY miserable. The eating disorder isn't protecting you from misery - it IS the misery" "The length of time you've been struggling has NOTHING to do with whether you can recover" "You've been wearing the eating disorder mask for how long now? It's time to unmask" "Wanting freedom isn't enough. You have to DO it" Your Halloween Challenge: Part 1: Identify and Unmask Your Scariest Lie Write down the SCARIEST lie you've been believing - the one that has the most power over you. Then unmask it by writing the TRUTH next to that lie. Examples: Lie: "I can't trust myself around food" Truth: "I am learning to trust myself one choice at a time" Lie: "I'm too old to recover" Truth: "Recovery is possible at any age, and I'm starting today" Lie: "If I gain weight, I'll be miserable" Truth: "I'm already miserable. Freedom is worth more than a number on the scale" Part 2: Face One Food Fear This Halloween Weekend Take one action that scares you: Have one piece of candy without guilt Order the food you actually want Take a rest day without panic Eat Halloween treats with your family without restriction One unmasked lie. One fear faced. That's how recovery starts. Reflection Questions: Which of the 5 scary stories has the most power over me? How long have I been wearing the eating disorder "mask"? What am I missing out on while I'm trapped in food fear? If my kids or grandkids are watching, what am I modeling about trust and food? What would change in my life if I stopped believing the scariest lie? Am I ready to unmask and show up as my real self? What's ONE fear I can face this Halloween weekend? Who This Episode Is For: This Halloween episode is for you if: You experience candy panic and food fear during holidays You've been struggling for 10, 20, 30+ years and think it's "too late" You're in your 40s, 50s, or 60s and wonder if recovery is possible at your age You can't trust yourself around "trigger foods" You're terrified of gaining weight if you stop restricting You're missing out on holiday memories with family because of food obsession You're exhausted from wearing the ED mask and pretending everything is fine You're ready to stop being haunted by lies and start living in truth You need permission to believe change is possible after all this time Special Episode Note: EPISODE 250! This milestone episode falls on Halloween, making it the perfect time to unmask the eating disorder and celebrate how far you've come. Whether this is your first episode or you've been listening since day one, thank you for being part of this community. Recovery is possible, girlfriend - and it starts with unmasking the lies. Important Truth: Eating disorders have the highest mortality rate of any mental illness. This isn't small. This is life and death. If you're trapped in the cycle of food fear, restriction, and believing you've been struggling "too long" to ever find freedom, please hear this: It's not too late. Recovery is possible. And you deserve to live without being haunted. Ready to Unmask Your Eating Disorder and Find Freedom? Lindsey has spots open for one-on-one recovery coaching. If you're done being haunted by scary stories and ready to live in truth, visit www.herbestself.co to book your complimentary consultation. Let's make this the last Halloween you spend trapped in these lies. Connect with Lindsey Website: www.herbestself.co  Private Facebook Community: Her Best Self Society www.herbestselfsociety.com  1:1 Client Applications: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms Love this episode? Here's how you can support: 💝 Rate and review to help more perfectionists find freedom 💝 Share with a friend who's stuck in the perfection trap 💝 Join the Facebook community for recovery hugs and support 💝 Apply for 1:1 coaching if you're ready for personalized guidance Special Announcements: 🎉 Subscribe to the email list at www.herbestself.co to get your free recovery journal download 🎉 Free FB Community at www.herbestselfsociety.com  About the Host Lindsey Nichol is a former competitive figure skater turned God-led entrepreneur, boy mom, and digital CEO. She understands how core beliefs formed in childhood can create and maintain eating disorder patterns, and she's passionate about helping women identify and transform these beliefs to find lasting freedom. If this episode helped you feel hopeful again and remember your worth isn't found in your body or on your plate, please share it with someone who needs to hear this message. Your support helps more women break the chains of limiting beliefs. *While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.

Girlfriend, it's time for some real talk. If you keep saying you want recovery but your actions don't match your words, this episode is your wake-up call. Host Lindsey Nichol delivers tough love with compassion as she breaks down the truth: there are two types of people in this world - those with reasons and those with results. Which one are you? In this powerful episode, Lindsey shares her own struggle with desperately wanting recovery while still restricting, lying to her treatment team, and choosing the "safe" option every single time. She'll teach you how one simple shift - replacing "I can't" with "I won't" - can completely transform your recovery journey by helping you own your choices and reclaim your power. If you're tired of making excuses, breaking promises to yourself, and staying stuck in the same cycle, this is the episode that will challenge you to finally show up for yourself and your family. In This Episode, You'll Learn: The Two Types of People Framework: Those with REASONS vs those with RESULTS - which one are you? Why having a list of excuses keeps you stuck in disordered eating patterns How to shift from wanting recovery to DOING recovery The "I Can't" vs "I Won't" Truth Bomb: Why "I can't" gives away your power and keeps you playing victim How replacing "I can't" with "I won't" creates awareness and ownership The massive difference between these two phrases in your recovery journey Lindsey's Personal Story: When she desperately wanted to get better but her actions didn't match How she was still restricting while saying she wanted freedom The moment she realized she was tired of her own BS and didn't want to be a statistic What finally shifted her from reasons to results The Reality Check You Need: Why your fear isn't protecting you - it's imprisoning you How every broken promise reinforces the belief that you can't trust yourself The truth about what breaking promises is really doing to your recovery Key Takeaways: ✨ There are two types of people: those with reasons and those with results - you get to choose which one you'll be ✨ "I can't" is a lie - what you really mean is "I won't" and that's a choice you have power over ✨ Wanting recovery and DOING recovery are completely different things - listening to podcasts isn't the same as taking action ✨ You cannot want recovery more than you want the eating disorder - your actions reveal what you truly want ✨ Your recovery isn't just for you - it's for your family too - they need to see you model what keeping promises looks like ✨ Every action you take is a vote for who you're becoming - what are you voting for today? Powerful Quotes from This Episode: "Recovery isn't happening because you keep breaking promises to yourself" "There are two types of people in this world - those with reasons and those with results" "Every time you say 'I can't,' what you really mean is 'I won't'" "My desires and my future wants didn't match my daily actions" "I was tired of my own BS. I didn't want to be a statistic" "Wanting recovery and DOING recovery are two completely different things" "Your fear is not protecting you. It's imprisoning you" "You cannot want recovery more than you want the eating disorder" "Your family can't see what you're not modeling" "You are one decision away from a completely different life" "Those with reasons stay stuck. Those with results change their lives" Featured Wisdom: Brené Brown: "You either walk inside your story and own it, or you stand outside your story and hustle for your worthiness." James Clear (Atomic Habits): "Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become." Mel Robbins: "You are one decision away from a completely different life." Important Truth: Did you know? Eating disorders have the HIGHEST mortality rate of any mental illness. This isn't small. This is life and death. If you're stuck in the cycle of wanting recovery but not doing recovery, it's time to get honest about what's at stake. Your Two Challenges (Do Them NOW): Challenge #1: The "I Won't" Awareness Exercise For the next 24 hours, every time you catch yourself saying "I can't," PAUSE. Take a breath. Replace it with "I won't." Examples: "I can't eat that" → "I won't eat that" "I can't rest today" → "I won't rest today" "I can't be honest right now" → "I won't be honest right now" Notice how different that FEELS. When you admit it's a choice, you suddenly have the power to make a different one. Challenge #2: Make ONE Promise and Keep It Just ONE. Not ten. Not a complete recovery overhaul. ONE promise. Maybe it's: "I will eat breakfast tomorrow, even if it scares me" "I will take a rest day this week" "I will order something different at the restaurant" "I will tell my therapist one true thing I've been hiding" Write it down. Then DO IT. Prove to yourself that you're someone who keeps promises. Reflection Questions to Journal On: What excuses have I been using to avoid recovery? Where is the gap between what I SAY I want and what I'm actually DOING? What promises have I been breaking to myself? Am I someone with reasons or someone with results? What am I voting for with my choices today? What type of person am I becoming based on my current actions? What's ONE promise I can make and keep today? If I'm honest with myself, do I want recovery more than I want the eating disorder? Who This Episode Is For: This episode is your wake-up call and reality check if you: Keep saying you want recovery but your actions don't match Have a list of excuses for why "now isn't the right time" Break promises to yourself regularly Lie to your treatment team about what you're really doing Choose the "safe" option every single time Say "I can't" more than you take action Want to be present for your family but feel trapped Are tired of making excuses and ready for results Need tough love mixed with fierce support Want to stop being a statistic and start living in freedom The Bottom Line: You have everything you need to recover. You have the desire. You have the resources. You have the support. The only thing standing between you and freedom is YOU. Your family needs you. Your future needs you. And most importantly, YOU need you. So stop playing small. Stop breaking promises. Stop saying "I can't" when you mean "I won't." Because those with reasons stay stuck. But those with RESULTS? They change their lives. Which one are you going to be? Ready to Stop Breaking Promises and Start Living Free? Lindsey has spots open for one-on-one recovery coaching. If you're ready to stop making excuses and start getting results, visit www.herbestself.co to book your complimentary consultation. Let's make this the season where everything changes. Now let's talk support: Ready to sign up for our recovery support group? www.herbestself.co/recoverycollective  📧 Email Lindsey: info@lindseynichol.com  🌐 Apply for Recovery Coaching: www.herbestself.co  💕 Join the Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com  Limited spots available for fall coaching - only 2 slots remaining Connect with Lindsey: 🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show: 💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week! Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now. Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly. *While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.