

It’s All Your Fault: High Conflict People
TruStory FM
Hosted by Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. and Megan Hunter, MBA, It’s All Your Fault! High Conflict People explores the five types of people who can ruin your life—people with high conflict personalities and how they weave themselves into our lives in romance, at work, next door, at school, places of worship, and just about everywhere, causing chaos, exhaustion, and dread for everyone else.
They are the most difficult of difficult people — some would say they’re toxic. Without them, tv shows, movies, and the news would be boring, but who wants to live that way in your own life!
Have you ever wanted to know what drives them to act this way?
In the It’s All Your Fault podcast, we’ll take you behind the scenes to understand what’s happening in the brain and illuminates why we pick HCPs as life partners, why we hire them, and how we can handle interactions and relationships with them. We break down everything you ever wanted to know about people with the 5 high conflict personality types: narcissistic, borderline, histrionic, antisocial/sociopath, and paranoid.
And we’ll give you tips on how to spot them and how to deal with them.
They are the most difficult of difficult people — some would say they’re toxic. Without them, tv shows, movies, and the news would be boring, but who wants to live that way in your own life!
Have you ever wanted to know what drives them to act this way?
In the It’s All Your Fault podcast, we’ll take you behind the scenes to understand what’s happening in the brain and illuminates why we pick HCPs as life partners, why we hire them, and how we can handle interactions and relationships with them. We break down everything you ever wanted to know about people with the 5 high conflict personality types: narcissistic, borderline, histrionic, antisocial/sociopath, and paranoid.
And we’ll give you tips on how to spot them and how to deal with them.
Episodes
Mentioned books

Feb 29, 2024 • 32min
Drawing the Line: Setting Boundaries for External Conflicts at Work
Learn how managers can navigate divisive societal issues at work by setting clear boundaries and promoting respectful communication. Discover strategies to manage high conflict personalities and prevent aggressive behaviors from disrupting workplace culture. Explore the importance of coaching for improving communication and addressing bullying behaviors in the workplace.

Feb 15, 2024 • 35min
Red Flags in Teen Relationships: Understanding Relationship Violence, Part 2
The podcast delves into teen dating violence, discussing personality disorders' impact on relationships, digital abuse, and intervention strategies. Topics include recognizing early signs of high conflict behaviors, the role of dialectical behavior therapy, and the importance of peer attitudes in teen relationships.

Feb 8, 2024 • 41min
Red Flags in Adult Relationships: Understanding Relationship Violence, Part 1
Exploring red flags in adult relationships, the podcast dives into personality disorders linked to domestic violence, spotting early warning signs, coercive control tactics, impulse control problems, and avoiding relationship blind spots.

10 snips
Feb 1, 2024 • 28min
Setting Limits Without Going Over the Line
Learn how to set healthy boundaries in high-conflict situations with Bill Eddy and Megan Hunter. From co-parenting to workplace conflicts and suspected lies, they provide practical tips and examples. Practice the BIF method, focus on protecting children, and reality test when needed. Find simple phrases to use when setting boundaries and enhance your most challenging relationships.

Dec 21, 2023 • 17min
Holiday Harmony: Keeping The Peace at Family Celebrations
Learn techniques for managing high-conflict personalities at family gatherings and avoiding unnecessary arguments. Discover strategies for maintaining peace and harmony, including setting ground rules and redirecting conversations. Explore the power of one-on-one conversations in bridging gaps and decreasing polarization. Gain practical tips for hosting peaceful events and handling difficult topics.

Dec 19, 2023 • 23min
Pulling the Plug on a Hostile Conversation
Learn how to defuse tense conversations and exit hostile interactions, with strategies from the High Conflict Institute. Discover techniques to redirect heated exchanges into constructive dialogue and gain insights on setting boundaries. Find out how to regain control in confrontational situations and why it's important to question unverified claims politely. Bill and Megan provide tools to end toxic conversations, maintain self-control, and model peaceful conflict resolution.

Dec 14, 2023 • 28min
Falsely Blamed? How to Protect Yourself and Respond
Learn strategies for reducing the risk of being blamed and managing false accusations. The hosts provide tips for responding to false blame and correcting misinformation, while avoiding escalation. Discover the importance of recognizing high conflict personalities and providing factual information when needed. This episode empowers listeners to protect themselves in high conflict situations.

Dec 7, 2023 • 54min
Civil Communications for Lawyers and Law Offices
Guest Rehana Jamal discusses strategies for clear and civil communication in the legal field. The episode focuses on the BIFF method for responding to emotionally-charged messages, highlighting how it builds relationships and saves time. They emphasize that small changes in communication can transform legal conflicts and prevent escalation. The hosts provide practical tools, such as the BIFF framework, for lawyers and court staff to use right away.

Nov 23, 2023 • 23min
Grief Over the Death of a High Conflict Loved One
This episode discusses coping with complex emotions when a high conflict loved one dies, including feeling a mix of grief and relief. They address being blamed by the deceased and the destabilization of a high conflict adult child when losing a parent. The podcast also delves into conflicts during probate and emphasizes setting reasonable goals and finding the positive in difficult people.

9 snips
Nov 16, 2023 • 27min
The Art of Mindful Engagement: Using EAR Statements Judiciously
Discover how to effectively de-escalate high conflict people using EAR statements. Learn about different high conflict personality types and when EAR statements can be useful. Find out how EAR statements combined with limit setting can shift tense interactions. Understand the importance of safety and not overusing empathy with manipulative personalities. Explore the power of using EAR statements to foster empathy and respect, support individuals with challenging personality traits, and prioritize personal safety in conversations.