Conversations with Dr. Jennifer

Explore the powerful emotions of regret, remorse, and resentment and how they shape personal growth. Discover how embracing mistakes can lead to wisdom and self-compassion. Delve into the journey of forgiveness and the significance of confronting thought patterns. Understand the balance between trust and forgiveness in relationships. Learn practical strategies for dealing with disappointment and enhancing relationship strength. This discussion offers valuable insights for navigating life’s challenges and fostering resilience.

Jennifer Finlayson-Fife, an LDS relationship and sexuality coach with a Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology, shares insights on creating healthier partnerships amidst parenting challenges. She discusses the impact of ego on collaboration and highlights the importance of self-validation over seeking external approval. The conversation delves into navigating resentment, improving communication, and practicing gratitude. Additionally, she offers guidance on discussing sexuality with children, emphasizing the need for an open and supportive environment.

TJ and Ashley’s story is a familiar one for many.  Their marriage started out happily enough. They were young college students and enjoyed each other a lot during their first few years together. But things changed when TJ started graduate school during an economic downturn. TJ felt a tremendous amount of anxiety about his financial future, given the dim prospects for most students at the time. Competition was fierce and in TJ’s determination to ensure his family’s economic stability, he dedicated himself to his studies, leaving little time or emotional bandwidth for anything else, including Ashley. This period of limited connection was difficult for Ashley, and it persisted long after graduate school and into TJ’s high-demand career. While disappointed at first, eventually Ashley shifted her focus away from the marriage and created a comfortable, happy, and fulfilling life as a friend and mother.  To the outsider, TJ and Ashley’s relationship may look idyllic–TJ excelling professionally, Ashley busily involved with friends and her community, both invested and caring parents– but their marriage is much more brittle than meets the eye. Resentment and hostility have been simmering under the surface for more than a decade with TJ feeling unappreciated and unacknowledged for the sacrifices he has made to provide for his family and Ashley feeling neglected and unnoticed (except when TJ is wanting sexual attention). In this episode of Room for Two, Dr. Finlayson-Fife helps the couple think through the long term trajectory of their marriage and how they are undermining their current and future happiness by functioning in such a non-collaborative way. She helps Ashley see the rejection that permeates her interactions with TJ and teaches that the path forward is to stop walling and avoiding and to start looking honestly at herself, her real desires for the relationship, and her role in the lack of intimacy in the marriage. Be sure to subscribe to Room for Two TODAY to listen to the full episode! 

Exploring the role of self-honesty and self-definition in personal growth, relationships, and body acceptance. Embracing discomfort for self-improvement, transitioning from external validation to internal validation. Navigating truth in relationships, balancing criticism and self-acceptance. Encouraging self-acceptance, personal growth, and aligning decisions with authentic self for transformative change.

In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife takes questions from her audience about desire dynamics and the unique challenges faced by both the higher-desire spouse and the lower-desire spouse. In the discussion Dr. Finlayson-Fife discusses how couples can work together to create a more collaborative dynamic and what to do if only one spouse is interested in addressing the desire discrepancy. Listen to the full episode to learn more about: * Difficult Conversations * Dealing with Disappointment * Accommodation vs Choosing * Power Struggles in Marriage * The Pursuer / Distancer dynamic * Addressing conflict with honesty and compassion If you would like to learn more about this topic, consider enrolling in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Enhancing Sexual Intimacy course!

This podcast explores the meanings that impact our sexual experiences, the importance of freedom and choice, and the art of surrender/receiving. It also discusses how past experiences and societal messages can hinder sexual experiences and highlights the challenges faced by mothers of young children. Additionally, it emphasizes the importance of embracing sexuality and changing perspectives on life and parenting.

Choosing to love with your whole heart means accepting the risk of disappointment, loss, and grief.  These difficult realities come in many forms throughout a lifetime—unmet expectations, unfulfilled hopes and dreams, shifts in belief, broken promises, illness, and ultimately, death.  Facing acute loss is a harrowing and sobering experience, in part because it wakes us up to just how little control we have over our circumstances. But being compassionate towards ourselves in the process and finding the courage to keep moving forward, even when the path is riddled with uncertainty and vulnerability, is a beautiful form of faith. When we take the disappointment and loss that life hands us and use our difficult experiences to become kinder, more compassionate people, we increase our ability to deeply cherish the good around us, and we increase our capacity for joy.  This NEW episode is the audio from a Q&A session that Dr. Finlayson-Fife hosted on the topic of loss and grief. During the conversation, Dr. Finlayson-Fife took questions about all different types of losses including miscarriage, death, broken promises, and frustrated expectations. Listen to the full episode to learn more about: * Intimacy after loss * Mixed-faith marriages  * Intimacy after miscarriage  * Finding the courage to reinvest in life after loss You can watch the full recording of this Q&A session HERE. You can learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife's new mini-courses HERE.  

Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Tammy Hill of the Live Your Why Podcast to discuss masculinity, sexual shame, performance anxiety, desire discrepancies, masturbation and pornography, erectile dysfunction, being tolerated vs. being received sexually, and creating more intimate relationships.

Dr. Finlayson-Fife, a relationship dynamics expert, and Anne Nelson, a relationship coach specializing in collaborative communication, unpack the hidden potential of conflict in relationships. They emphasize that disagreements can foster growth if addressed constructively. The discussion highlights the damaging instinct to resort to losing strategies and explores the importance of self-awareness and humility. They also touch on the unique challenges in conflict-avoidant marriages and stress the necessity of honesty for true intimacy.

A podcast explores the challenges and strategies for finding common ground in a mixed-faith marriage. It discusses the pain and isolation that can come with differences in beliefs, values, and religion. They emphasize the importance of understanding and empathizing with a partner's perspective and share advice on maintaining religious beliefs while keeping the marriage intact. The podcast also explores the negative effects of ego-driven defensiveness and the journey of transforming a relationship through acceptance. Additionally, it discusses the ups and downs of marriage, including the value of friendship and managing differences.