Conversations with Dr. Jennifer

Dr. Finlayson-Fife, an expert at the intersection of spirituality and sexuality, shares profound insights on Eros as a transformative force. She argues that love can enhance spiritual growth and emphasizes the importance of authentic connection through vulnerability. The discussion includes reflections on navigating loss and finding purpose, with personal anecdotes highlighting resilience and hope. The impact of maternal strength is also celebrated, reminding listeners of the enduring spirit of love in overcoming life's challenges.

Want to hear the FULL episode? Subscribe to Room for Two! _____ After twenty years in a difficult marriage, Jack asked Diane for a divorce. Diane felt conflicted in response. Part of her was devastated. She had committed to Jack and took that commitment seriously. Never a quitter, she had been determined to stay the course in their marriage, despite the difficulty. But part of her also felt relief at the idea. Their marriage had been an exhausting one, and the thought of stepping away from a decades-long struggle was liberating. After the initial disorganization of the request, Diane settled herself and realized that, even if the marriage ended, her life would go on. She would be okay. But, as empowering as this realization was, it was in facing the real possibility of losing the marriage that she recognized just how much she actually wanted to CHOOSE the marriage. To choose Jack. As difficult as their relationship had been, Diane was waking up to just how much she wanted to work out a life WITH Jack.  With renewed commitment, Jack and Diane have been making progress in recent months. Jack has been more open and honest, and Diane has been working to untangle her thoughts from Jack's and to clarify her own desires.  Both Jack and Diane want a better sexual relationship, but Diane worries that their differing definitions of "better" might be a dealbreaker for Jack. In this episode of Room for Two, Dr. Finlayson-Fife helps Jack and Diane explore and better understand their sexual dynamic. They discuss Diane’s initial excitement about sex, how their honeymoon’s brief difficulties fractured her perception of her sexual self, and how her initial self criticism has continued to impact their sexual dynamic. Dr. Finlayson-Fife helps Diane see that despite her recent growth, her continued focus on pleasing Jack is standing in the way of her actually loving him. Dr. Finlayson-Fife teaches that the key to moving forward is for Diane to decide who she wants to be in her life and marriage, independent of the expectations of others. 

Dr. Finlayson-Fife, an expert in guiding couples through challenges of trust, dives into the unsettling realities of intimate deception. She unpacks how secrets, like emotional infidelity and financial dishonesty, disrupt relationships. With personal anecdotes, she discusses the pathways to healing and growth after betrayal. Listeners learn about the vital role of transparency and trust, and how these elements are essential in overcoming the devastating effects of hidden truths.

We are all pretty open books, whether or not we want to be. Those around us, including our children, have an incredible ability to map our minds. They “track” our actions, body language, facial expressions, and tone to understand our emotions, beliefs, and values, including our investment in them. In fact, the majority of our communication happens at this non-verbal level. What we say matters, of course, but the meaning of what we are saying comes from far more than just the words we speak.  In this new episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Heidi Benjaminson of the Confidence Coaching podcast to discuss mind mapping in parent-child relationships. They explore what our kids are mapping about us, how these mapped messages influence their perceptions and behaviors, and what we can do if course correction is needed.

Dr. Jennifer discusses men's sexuality in LDS culture, emphasizing positive views on masculinity and intimacy. Topics include masculine/feminine energies, sex/morality, emotional connection challenges, and the impact of pornography on relationships.

Dr. Finlayson-Fife discusses the loss of attraction in marriage due to habituation, boredom, and resentment, and offers advice on fostering attraction through gratitude, appreciation, and novelty. Topics include handling self-destructive habits, disappointment in appearance, unappealing personalities, and apathy towards health/hygiene.

In this conversation, Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife joins Dr. Julie Hanks to discuss her dissertation research, the ways that church culture has shaped women's sexuality, and how women can create a healthier relationship with desire, embodiment, and sexuality (no matter what stage of life they are in). Listen to the full episode to learn more about: * The importance of agency and self-definition in sexual relationships * Characteristics of fulfilling sexual relationships * Balancing personal desires with cultural expectations *The relationship between agency and desire * Encouraging self-definition in our children * The effects of childhood sexual abuse on adult sexuality If you would like to learn more about these topics, consider enrolling in Dr. Finlayson-Fife's Art of Desire course for women! You can watch the video of this conversation HERE.

It’s tempting for us to use our children’s successes or failures to measure OUR success as parents. But tangling ourselves up with our children this way is not only a recipe for disappointment and frustration (on both sides), it also stands in the way of REALLY loving and accepting our children for who they are. The sooner we recognize how little control we actually have over our children, the sooner we can let go of the fantasy that they prove or disprove our sufficiency (and the sooner we can get to work ACTUALLY loving them). To love our children is to see and value them for the unique individuals they are and offer our best to them. As humbling and refining of a practice parenting is, it is even more so for those who face the unique challenges and gifts of raising a child with special needs. In this NEW episode of Navigating the Spectrum, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Michelle Portlock to discuss her personal experience with parenting a neurodivergent child. The discussion covers the importance of compassion (for yourself, your spouse, your child, and your circumstances), and thoughts about how parents can work together to reduce anxiety / stress, improve communication, and foster a nurturing, supportive relationship with each other and their child(ren). **You can learn more about Dr. Finlayson-Fife's How to Talk To Your Kids About Sex Course HERE**

Delve into the allure of emotional affairs and the impact on relationships. Discuss intimacy avoidance, self-deception, and trustworthiness. Explore boundaries, validation-seeking behaviors, and the complexities of healing after betrayal. Learn about the importance of honesty and true intimacy in safeguarding against emotional infidelity.

Teens' screen time impact on relationships and brain development discussed. Balancing technology use for growth and connection is crucial. Empowering teens to make wise decisions by facilitating self-authoring. Importance of educating children about pornography and sexuality in a healthy manner.