Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Think teens can’t have fun without booze? Think again. In this episode of I’ll Do Better Tomorrow, Justin and Kylie share the behind-the-scenes of hosting an 18th birthday that was loud, laughter-filled - and completely alcohol-free. From a $9.99 Bunnings “doorbell hack” every parent of a gamer needs, to setting clear boundaries that still let kids feel free, you’ll hear how the Coulson's created connection and unforgettable memories without the hangover. KEY POINTS The $9.99 Bunnings wireless doorbell that stops the endless “DINNER!” yelling at teens in headphones. How to host a high-energy, alcohol-free party teens actually rave about. Teaching kids they don’t need substances to have fun or belong. Using “I’ll Do Better Tomorrow” reflections to guide weekly family growth. A fresh take on schooling: why one daughter chose a vocational “industry school” and how alternative pathways (and gap years) can set kids up for success. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE“Life is long. If the standard path isn’t working, stop forcing your child to fit something that doesn’t fit.” – Dr Justin Coulson RESOURCES MENTIONED Register interest for Justin’s upcoming Boys book here Study proves the importance of dads teaching sex education to their sons | Will & Woody A $10 Doorbell Stopped Me Yelling At My Teen | Lise & Sarah Study links a gap year to better university grades | The Conversation Gap Years, ATAR Myths & the Real Path to Success After School [with Amy Dyer] - Happy Families Podcast ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Model Substance-Free Fun: Show your teen that great parties don’t need alcohol. Set Clear, Kind Boundaries: Explain expectations up front—then let your kids rise to meet them. Explore Alternate School Paths: Investigate vocational schools, traineeships, or gap years if the traditional system isn’t serving your child. Create Simple Connection Cues: Try the wireless doorbell or another gentle way to call your teen without yelling. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

“Mum, I’m bored!” Sound familiar? In a world of endless screens and instant entertainment, boredom feels like a problem to fix. But what if it’s actually a hidden superpower? Dr Justin and Kylie Coulson unpack the science of boredom - why the right kind helps kids grow more creative, independent, and emotionally steady, and when it tips into trouble. Get quick, practical ideas to turn those “I’m bored!” moments into brain-boosting opportunities. KEY POINTS Good vs. Bad Boredom: Occasional boredom in a stimulating environment builds creativity, resilience, and emotional regulation. Chronic boredom in an empty environment links to anxiety and risky behaviour. Screens & Overstimulation: Devices hijack attention, prevent true mental rest, and can increase long-term boredom. The Brain on Boredom: When attention fades, the Default Mode Network activates - fueling imagination, identity-building, and problem-solving. Practical Parenting: Don’t rush to entertain. Provide an “enriched environment” (books, art supplies, outdoor space) and let kids self-direct. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “Boredom isn’t a failure of parenting - it’s a reset button for the brain.” —Dr Justin Coulson RESOURCES MENTIONED Inside the bored brain: Unlocking the power of the default mode network | PsyPost Forget Overscheduling vs Bordeom - Self Direction is Key [Happy Families Article] The Case Against Boredom [Happy Families Article] Unhurrying Childhood [Happy Families Article] Fast-forward to boredom: How switching behavior on digital media makes people more bored | Journal of Experimental Psychology #1045 – The Art & Science of Family Meetings [Happy Families Podcast] ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Stop Fixing It: When kids complain, calmly acknowledge and leave space for them to decide what’s next. Prime the Environment: Keep open-ended materials - Lego, art supplies, books - visible and accessible. Embrace Downtime: Show your own healthy boredom habits: daydreaming, journaling, screen-free walks. Breath. Subscribe to the Happy Families newsletter Leave a voice memo here or email your questions/comments to podcasts@happyfamilies.com.auSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Is your child’s screen time spiralling—and every conversation about it ends in a fight? Professor Wayne Warburton, leading psychologist and researcher, reveals how apps and games are deliberately engineered to hook young brains. He explains the hidden neuroscience of addiction, what excessive screen use does to a child’s emotional regulation and attention, and how parents can reclaim calm without all-out war. If you’ve ever wondered why your tween melts down when you say “time’s up,” this episode is a must-listen. KEY POINTS Why modern apps use gambling-style tactics and AI to keep kids scrolling. How heavy screen use weakens the prefrontal cortex—the part of the brain that manages focus, planning, and emotional control. Simple, science-backed steps to reset family screen habits and return kids to the “driver’s seat.” Practical advice for conversations that don’t turn into shouting matches. Why social connection doesn’t have to mean social media. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE“It’s not your child’s fault—or yours. These products are built to be addictive. The goal is to put your child back in the driver’s seat, not the screen.” — Dr Wayne Warburton RESOURCES MENTIONED Dr Wayne Warburton’s books Growing Up Fast and Furious and The Importance of Media Literacy HappyFamilies.com.au for family screen-plan templates and parenting resources ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Choose the right moment: Discuss screens only when everyone is calm and offline. Externalise the problem: Frame it as “us versus the tech designers,” not parent versus child. Co-create a plan: Involve kids in setting screen limits and consequences; write it down. Build healthy replacements: Help kids identify offline ways to cope with boredom, anxiety, or stress. Model balance: Show your own healthy screen habits—your example speaks louder than rules. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Do you really trust your teen to manage their phone—and the algorithm—alone? In this episode, Justin and Kylie Coulson tackle a Gold Coast mum’s burning question: should parents rely on filtering apps or on trust? Justin shares his eye-opening experiment pretending to be a teenage boy on Instagram (and what the algorithm served up), while Kylie explains why this isn’t just a “trust” issue—it’s a maturity issue. Together they reveal how to set limits that actually protect kids, build accountability, and still keep the relationship strong. Key Points Why filters aren’t foolproof—and why blind trust is even riskier The hidden danger of “friendly” algorithms that quickly escalate to violent or explicit content Justin’s experiment that turned his feed dark in just two weeks The 3 E’s of Effective Discipline: Explore, Explain, Empower How to create family tech agreements that work—and stick Quote of the Episode “We say we don’t like the restraints, but we actually need them. Just like a roller-coaster harness, limits keep our kids safe when life turns upside down.” – Justin Coulson Resources Mentioned Managing Screens at Home [Webinar] Included in the Happy Families membership. Action Steps for Parents Audit together: Sit with your teen and explore what their algorithms are serving them. Set limits, not locks: Use filters as one layer, but focus on ongoing conversations. Use the 3 E’s: Explore their perspective, Explain your concerns, Empower them to co-create safe screen habits. Find your village: Connect with like-minded parents to make consistent boundaries easier. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Your sweet preschooler just turned into a pint-sized whirlwind—kicking, screaming, and even hitting.Before you panic or punish, listen in. Dr Justin and Kylie Coulson unpack why three-year-olds lash out, why it’s actually developmentally normal, and the calm, practical steps that help them (and you) find peace. Key Points Why hitting at age three is common—and not a sign you’re raising a violent teen. The real drivers: big emotions, low impulse control, limited language. Three core responses: stay regulated, set clear limits, redirect with movement or creative outlets. After the storm: empathic conversations and rehearsal for “next time.” Prevention tips: check the HALTS (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired, Stressed) and keep screen time low. Quote of the Episode “Regulating emotions is harder than learning to walk or tie shoelaces. Your job is to stay the adult while your child learns.” – Dr Justin Coulson Resources Mentioned Little People, Big Feelings [Webinar] – practical tools for parents of toddlers and preschoolers. Little People, Big Feelings [The Summit] Action Steps for Parents Stay calm—model the regulation you want your child to learn. State the boundary—“We have gentle hands. Hitting hurts.” Redirect energy—offer drawing, movement, or grounding games. Debrief later—when calm, problem-solve and rehearse next time. Check the basics—food, sleep, connection, and screen habits. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What will your kids remember most about you? It’s probably not what you think…  Ever felt Father’s Day pressure - the gifts, the expectations, the hope it all comes together? In this episode, Justin & Kylie open up about low expectations, the best Father’s Day prank ever, and the moments that mattered most. From frisbee at the beach to chaotic family games, to the one phrase Justin’s kids say defined their childhood, this conversation is raw, funny, and surprisingly moving. KEY POINTS: Why one Aussie school pushed back against iPads in primary years Sabrina Carpenter’s new album NOT for children The tie prank that left every dad at church matching Why simple, spontaneous family time beats curated “perfect” events “Push Dad off the Bed” - the family game still loved by teens and young adults The phrase Justin’s kids treasure most: People matter. Things don’t. RESOURCES MENTIONED: Happy Families Website Send us a voice memo: podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au KPop Demon Hunters on Netflix ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS: Keep celebrations simple - the memories matter more than the details. Find playful traditions (even silly ones) that bring everyone together. When things go wrong, remind your kids: people matter, things don’t. Give your children more of the one gift they’ll always want - your time. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When cookbook author and influencer Sarah’s holiday plans with her 6-year-old were suddenly stamped “unauthorised,” it lit up headlines — and sparked a question every parent asks: Is a week off school really that big a deal? In this episode, Justin and Kylie dive into the tug-of-war between school rules and family priorities. Do term-time holidays harm learning, or can real-life experiences sometimes matter more? You’ll hear the research, the rules (state by state), and the reality for families just trying to make it work. KEY POINTS The viral story that sparked the debate: Sarah’s denied leave mid-flight. Why rules vary wildly depending on your postcode (NSW vs. QLD vs. VIC). What the research really says about missing school — even just a few days. The cost factor: why many families can’t afford school-holiday travel. When family connection, culture, and life experience outweigh the timetable. Practical tips for working with schools to find a middle ground. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE "The real question isn’t about holidays — it’s whether we trust parents to make wise, nuanced decisions for their kids." – Justin Coulson RESOURCES MENTIONED Happy Families Website Connect with us on Instagram & Facebook ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Check your state’s rules before booking — policies differ widely. Communicate early and respectfully with your child’s school. Choose timing wisely (avoid early weeks, assessment blocks, or transition times). Weigh family priorities — cost, connection, cultural experiences — alongside school routines. Remember the big picture: One week doesn’t define your child’s education. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

School refusal and absence are at crisis levels. More than 40% of students are missing at least 10% of school days — and it’s only getting worse. Behind every statistic is a child struggling with anxiety, chronic illness, or the weight of a system that doesn’t fit. In this powerful conversation, Dr Justin Coulson speaks with Megan Gilmour, CEO of Missing School and 2025 ACT Australian of the Year. Megan’s own son battled a life-threatening illness that kept him from school for years, and her advocacy has since transformed the way we think about education, connection, and support for kids who can’t physically be in the classroom. If you’re worried about your child’s school avoidance — whether from illness, anxiety, or overwhelm — this episode will give you both hope and practical direction. KEY POINTS: Why school absence has skyrocketed since COVID. The hidden costs of missing school: academics, friendships, identity, and mental health. How school avoidance affects the whole family. What digital connection and flexible solutions can look like for struggling students. Why the current school model isn’t fit for today’s kids — and what needs to change. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE: “Wherever school absence starts — illness, anxiety, or overwhelm — the long-term impacts on a child’s wellbeing and future are profound. Connection is everything.” – Megan Gilmour RESOURCES MENTIONED: Missing School School Refusal [HF Article] #533 Emotion Based School Avoidance [HF Podcast Episode] ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS: Notice the early signs of school avoidance — and take them seriously. Keep the focus on connection, not just attendance. Explore flexible options, including digital classroom access, where possible. Seek support: schools can and must accommodate differences. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What do you do when your child’s confidence starts to look like bragging? Today’s tricky parenting question comes from Joanna, whose 12-year-old daughter is bright, kind, and wonderfully self-assured—but sometimes her enthusiasm feels a little too much. In this episode, Justin and Kylie unpack how to nurture confidence while gently guiding kids toward humility and social awareness. You’ll hear practical ways to help your child celebrate others, avoid “showing off,” and learn through natural experiences—without squashing their spirit. KEY POINTS: Why confidence in tweens is precious (and why most kids lose it) The difference between being “interesting” vs. being “interested” Teaching kids to be “people builders” instead of show-offs The power of teachable moments over lectures How unconditional love helps kids learn from their own mistakes QUOTE OF THE EPISODE: “Confidence is precious. We don’t want to dampen it—but we can guide kids to use it in ways that lift others up.” RESOURCES MENTIONED: Submit your tricky question: happyfamilies.com.au/podcasts ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS: Celebrate your child’s confidence—don’t squash it. Encourage them to notice and cheer for others’ successes. Use quiet, reflective conversations after social moments as teaching opportunities. Frame discussions around being a good friend and including others. Be the “soft place to land” when friendships hit bumps. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Childcare scandals. Social media bans. Kids spending nine hours a day glued to screens. As Child Protection Week shines a spotlight on children’s safety, parents are asking: How do I really protect my kids — both online and in real life? Dr Justin Coulson speaks with Dr Katrina Lines, CEO of Act for Kids, about shocking new research and simple ways families can protect kids online and in real life. KEY POINTS: Why removing men from childcare is not the solution — and what really needs to change. Surprising new research: kids actually prefer time with family over screens. Why kids resist screen limits but thrive when they finally log off. How to “meet in the middle” by joining kids in their online world. Preparing your family for the upcoming social media age ban. Simple daily strategies to create real-life connection, even in busy households. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE: “This is the important stuff — not the cooking, not the laundry — but listening and being present with our kids.” — Dr Katrina Lines RESOURCES MENTIONED: Act for Kids: Let’s Connect IRL Happy Families Resources ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS: Create small daily “connection moments” — in the car, over dinner, or while cooking. Join your child occasionally in their online world to build trust and safety. Open conversations now about the upcoming social media age ban — listen, don’t dismiss. Plan one weekly family activity that everyone can look forward to. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.