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Perfectionism Rewired

Latest episodes

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Jun 5, 2024 • 8min

Upgrade Compartmentalize for Confidence

Feel like you’re carrying the weight of the world? You want to be a present parent, crush it at work, keep it fresh with your partner, call your bestie back and drink your water, BUT when you compartmentalize and be whoever you need to be to get the result, you end up exhausted. Say goodbye to the exhausting cycle of squishing yourself to fit in. Trade being contrived for exuding confidence, with the only sustainable solution for ambitious perfectionistic people. Plus hear about that one time CLG sharted in her jumpsuit🤣 On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your family or turning down the volume on self-criticism, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to exude confidence in  each + every part of your life and *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized Sneaky Peek at What You'll Learn In This Episode:Why compartmentalizing parts of yourself leads to burnout, disconnection and resentment in your relationships.How to be grounded and solid in who are, without the wishy-washy contorting yourself to meet external expectations.Giving yourself permission to experience joy without conditions Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.
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May 11, 2024 • 9min

How to Harmonize Striving For Excellence w/ A High-Stakes Career

Feeling Clenchy? Discover the truth about what *really* happens when you let go of rigid rules that've made you super successful. I'm giving you the uncensored inside scoop on exactly wha happened when I stopped fisting, opened up to new possibilities and began to surf my own ocean--my achieving + energy increased 80%!!!!!  If you're exhausted or feel like it's always something, this episode will give you the fuel  to rise up. On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your family or breaking generational cycles of Self-Criticism, Perfectionism Optimized private 1-1 coaching is how you expand your confidence, make your choices aligned with your values and *finally feel* as amazing as your life looks. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized Sneaky Peek at What You'll Learn In This Episode:Why wayyy too often perfectionists overwork while oblivious to our own underperforming (aka sunk cost fallacy)How to know if you're fistingWhere you can go to get unrivaled support designed specifically for high performance people who want to feel good again without sacrificing Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.
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May 3, 2024 • 8min

"I Should Know This" Lies We Tell Ourselves in Rumination

If you've ever felt trapped in a cycle of I should be past this and using your intellectual smarts as evil tools to hammer yourself with, this episode is for you. On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your family or breaking generational cycles of Self-Criticism, Perfectionism Optimized private 1-1 coaching is how you expand your confidence, make your choices aligned with your values and *finally feel* as amazing as your life looks. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized Sneaky Peek at What You'll Learn In This Episode:Unconscious Competence: Understanding embodied knowledge vs mental masturbation How telling yourself "I should know this" is the cowardly response (and what the courageous one is)Why knowing something intellectually doesn't translate to action  Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.
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Apr 27, 2024 • 8min

Perfectionism is the New ADHD

Fighting against yourself IS playing life on torture mode AND entirely OPTIONAL. Most solutions for overcoming perfectionism suck. They're not empowering, efficient or any FUN, plus research shows Overcoming Perfectionism simply *doesn’t work*when you are driven, ambitious, caring, high-performer. That’s WHY I’m revealing how you can take your frustrating perfectionistic tendencies—like catastrophizing, people-pleasing and overthinking— and remix them with refreshingly practical perspectives from our neurodiversity neighbor, ADHD.  Want to feel as incredible on the inside as your life looks on the outside? Then you gotta check out Perfectionism Optimized, the only 1-1 private coaching backed by SCIENCE for driven, ambitious, Type-A high performers with perfectionistic tendencies. Inquire today over at:  https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized   Perfectionism Rewired podcast is brought to you by America's leader on rewiring perfectionism, Courtney Love Gavin (CLG) and is committed to neuroscience truth + accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens.WTF does Perfectionist Affirming mean? Perfectionist affirming is an empowered view where perfectionistic tendencies are not seen as deficits to be “fixed” -  no victims, powerlessness or fighting against. Instead your perfectionism is leveraged to work for you. Part of neurodiversity movement that sees humans as uniquely wired individuals who all experience the world differently. Truth + Accuracy In Episode 220 Is Brought To You By:Curran, T., & Hill, A. P. (2019). Perfectionism is increasing over time: A meta-analysis of birth cohort differences from 1989 to 2016. Psychological Bulletin, 145(4), 410–429. https://doi.org/10.1037/bul0000138Daniilidou, A. (2023). Understanding the relationship between the multidimensional perfectionism and self-compassion in adults: The effect of age. Europe’s Journal of Psychology, 19(4), 371–386. https://doi.org/10.5964/ejop.11981Otsuka T. (2023). ADHD For Smart Ass Women (1st ed.). William Morrow   Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.
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Apr 21, 2024 • 19min

Unlearning Learned Helplessness

Dolly Parton, Serena Williams, Kobe Bryant, Sara Blakely, and Marie Kondo share how they transformed perfectionism into a driving force for success. They discuss learned helplessness and the shift towards empowerment, emphasizing that perfectionists can leverage their traits for innovation and growth. Personal anecdotes highlight viewing failures as stepping stones, while offering strategies to rewire perfectionistic tendencies. This powerful conversation encourages taking responsibility for one’s journey and finding support in overcoming challenges.
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Apr 16, 2024 • 15min

How To Let Go Of Resentment (w/o Exploding On Your Partner)

Got resentment? Uncover where resentment is hiding in your home responsibilities and the No. 1 mistake you're probably making when it comes to communicating your frustration (this takes you out of black and white thinking).  Plus the ONE TOOL that makes you 90% less resentful towards your partner + makes 100% sense as to why you feel like it's all on your shoulders. This TOOL is like having the power to show upcoming storms in your relationship, dissolve them ahead of time and avoid saying mean things you feel guilty about later  – for  both you + partner!  Upgrade from resentment to reconnection inside Perfectionism Optimized, the only 1-1 private coaching backed by SCIENCE + exclusively designed for driven, ambitious + type-A high achievers with perfectionistic tendencies who want to feel as incredible on the inside as their life looks on the outside.  Melt your stress away starting today over at:  https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized 🎁➡️ 🎉 Rewire the Resentment in Your Relationship with this Top-Tier TOOL I created for private clients. Yours to enjoy as a gift for my bday   https://bit.ly/perfectionism-rewired-toolTruth + Accuracy In Episode 218 Is Brought To You By:Graff, T. C., Birmingham, W. C., Wadsworth, L. L., & Hung, M. (2023). Doing it all: Effects of Family Responsibilities and Marital Relationship Quality on Mothers’ Ambulatory Blood Pressure. Annals of Behavioral Medicine, 58(1), 67–78. https://doi.org/10.1093/abm/kaad058Hiekel, N., & Ivanova, K. (2023). Changes in Perceived Fairness of Division of Household Labor Across Parenthood Transitions: Whose Relationship Satisfaction Is Impacted? Journal of Family Issues, 44(4), 1046-1073. https://doi.org/10.1177/0192513X211055119Nelson, M. H. (2022). Resentment Is Like Drinking Poison? The Heterogeneous Health Effects of Affective Polarization. Journal of Health and Social Behavior/Journal of Health & Social Behavior, 63(4), 508–524. https://doi.org/10.1177/00221465221075311 Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.
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Apr 9, 2024 • 10min

High Performance ANXIOUS: Building Resilience + Calming Internal Chaos

Building Resilience IRL Intimate, all access behind-the-scenes look of how I get my anxious, overthinking Type-A high performance perfectionistic brain to calm TF down *when Anxiety strikes*. Previously only available on the Private Client Podcast, sharing with you in celebration of my birthday AND to show you there IS a MUCH better way to deal with your perfectionism. Where you're in charge, confident and connected to YOUR values. If you want to get out of your own way and be more present, this is the episode for you! On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Build confidence, courage and conviction in yourself while you playfully take charge and get out of your own way, with   Perfectionism Optimized private 1-1 coaching exclusively for driven, Type-A, high achieving perfectionists who are committed to excellence. Get your stress-free start, today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized Listen to the full episode to hear:Two biggest mistakes Perfectionists make when anxiety, panic, overwhelm strikesHow Courtney Love Gavin changed from a life filled with fear and self-criticism to one of joy, resilience and strengthThe importance of LSD in overcoming anxiety and annoying perfectionistic tendencies. Truth and Accuracy In This Episode Is Brought To You By:Handley, A. K., Egan, S. J., Kane, R. T., & Rees, C. S. (2014). The relationships between perfectionism, pathological worry and generalised anxiety disorder. BMC Psychiatry, 14(1). https://doi.org/10.1186/1471-244x-14-98Price, C. J., & Hooven, C. (2018). Interoceptive Awareness Skills for Emotion Regulation: Theory and Approach of Mindful Awareness in Body-Oriented Therapy (MABT). Frontiers in Psychology, 9. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2018.00798Schoeller, Félix & Haar Horowitz, Adam & Jain, A. & Maes, Pattie. (2019). Enhancing human emotions with interoceptive technologies. Physics of Life Reviews. 31. 10.1016/j.plrev.2019.10.008. Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.
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Apr 2, 2024 • 22min

Recovering Perfectionist vs REWIRED Perfectionist (lessons from Perfectionist CEO)

Discover the extraordinary scientifically proven benefits of rewiring your perfectionism with special guest and former #recovering perfectionist, CEO Dylan. Plus the hidden costs of unchecked perfectionism and how it's sucking the life out of you (literally). Ready to leverage your perfectionism in WAY YOU LOVE WITHOUT all the victimy #recoveringperfectionist, be less ambitious BS  you've been told all your life? Enter  Perfectionism Optimized, the ONLY high-integrity private coaching program for perfectionists that empowers neurodiverse, high-achieving and Type A individuals to quit fighting against their perfectionism forever using proven neuroscience so that you can *FINALLY* feel as amazing as your life looks and embody the powerhouse you’re designed to be. Get your stress free start today at  https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized Listen to the Full episode to Hear:How to harmonize your high standards with a high-stakes career and transform your perfectionistic drive into a source of strength and resourcefulness.Why rewiring your perfectionism creates breakthroughs in perception and efficiency, empowering you to approach challenges with curiosity and creativity.Uncover the reasons why perfectionists often overwork yet remain oblivious to their own underperforming, and how you can develop a keen sense of self-awareness to break free from this cycle of striving and self-criticism. TIMESTAMPS Ep. 216: 00:00-The Perfectionist's Dilemma: Chasing Satisfaction01:55-Meet Dylan: Seeing Problems Everywhere03:37-Overworking To Distract From Self-Criticism06:19-Interoceptive Awareness Shifts Anxious to Excited08:04-IRL Rewired Perfectionist Success: Dylan's Journey Continues09:47-Why Achievements Feel Empty and How to Change That10:12-Science of Feeling Good: Dopamine and Serotonin Explained11:55-Building Emotional Agility and Resilience15:24-How Rewired Perfectionism Enhances Mental Focus + Confidence17:59-Courageously Running Towards vs Fearfully Running Away21:53-Dropping contempt and judgment that blocks change Truth + Accuracy In This Episode Is Brought To You By:Do You Play to Win—or to Not Lose? (2013, March). Retrieved January 29, 2024, from Harvard Business Review website: https://hbr.org/2013/03/do-you-play-to-win-or-to-not-loseCovington, Martin V., and Kimberly J. Müeller. “Intrinsic Versus Extrinsic Motivation: An Approach/Avoidance Reformulation.” Educational Psychology Review 13, no. 2 (2001): 157–76. doi:10.1023/A:1009009219144.Sirois, F. M., J. Monforton, and M. Simpson. “If Only I Had Done Better: Perfectionism and the Functionality of Counterfactual Thinking.” Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin 36, no. 12 (2010): 1675–92. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167210387614.Suh, H., Gnilka, P. B., & Rice, K. G. (2017). Perfectionism and well-being: A positive psychology framework. Personality and Individual Differences, 111, 25–30. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2017.01.041‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.
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Mar 29, 2024 • 11min

6 Self-Sabotaging Patterns Perfectionists Unknowingly Nurture

For driven perfectionists self-sabotage often appears as status quo success and our unfulfilling choices are applauded. Bc these self-sabotaging perfectionistic patterns go undetected, you’re off chasing an illusion of control, achieving under pressure with an overcrowded schedule, snipping at your spouse,  thinking I'll be happy when..."  only to find the goalposts keep moving. Discover precisely how to recognize your own self-defeating perfectionism patterns, exactly what's driving your self-sabotaging behaviors and the perfectionist's guide to stop self-sabotage.. If you're committed to intentionally moving beyond autopilot and   Perfectionism Optimized  high-integrity private coaching is for you! Sumptuous, science-backed solutions designed specifically for tenacious Type-A perfectionists. Get your stress free start today at  https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized Truth + Accuracy In This Episode Is Brought To You By:Do You Play to Win—or to Not Lose? (2013, March). Retrieved January 29, 2024, from Harvard Business Review website: https://hbr.org/2013/03/do-you-play-to-win-or-to-not-loseCovington, Martin V., and Kimberly J. Müeller. “Intrinsic Versus Extrinsic Motivation: An Approach/Avoidance Reformulation.” Educational Psychology Review 13, no. 2 (2001): 157–76. doi:10.1023/A:1009009219144.Sirois, F. M., J. Monforton, and M. Simpson. “If Only I Had Done Better: Perfectionism and the Functionality of Counterfactual Thinking.” Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin 36, no. 12 (2010): 1675–92. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167210387614.Suh, H., Gnilka, P. B., & Rice, K. G. (2017). Perfectionism and well-being: A positive psychology framework. Personality and Individual Differences, 111, 25–30. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2017.01.041‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.
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Mar 25, 2024 • 12min

Self Critic Screams: What Your Body Is Dying To Tell You

What if your self critic is actually a caring signal from your unconscious, warning you of danger ahead + to get off this path? Your self critic is not the enemy; it's an alarm bell from your body. But it's near impossible to listen to it with all the NOISE + stigma surrounding criticism, self-love and self-compassion. Discover the health consequences of self-criticism and lessons from pro-athlete perfectionist who finally figured it out. This is the third episode in the self-criticism trilogy. I'm inviting you into the one place that can make your self critic a thing of the past— all you gotta do is take the first step.  Go for it today at  https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized Ep. 214 Timestamps02:04-The Iceberg of Self-Criticism03:27-Why Traditional Self Critic Approaches Fail Perfectionists04:37-Lessons From Pro-Athlete Perfectionism Optimized Client07:07-Link Between Cancer + Inner Critic08:02-From Criticism to Critical Condition IRL09:11-Making the Choice to Change  Truth + Accuracy In This Episode Is Brought To You By:Campos, R. C., Holden, R. R., Caçador, B., Ana Sofia Fragata, & Baleizão, C. (2018). Self-criticism, intensity of perceived negative life events, and distress: Results from a two-wave study. Personality and Individual Differences, 124, 145–149. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2017.12.004Ferrari, M., Ciarrochi, J., Yap, K., Baljinder Sahdra, & Hayes, S. C. (2022). Embracing the Complexity of our Inner Worlds: Understanding the Dynamics of Self-Compassion and Self-Criticism. Mindfulness, 13(7), 1652–1661. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12671-022-01897-5Thakur, N., & Baumann, N. (2022). Breaking the anxious cycle of self-criticism: Action orientation buffers the detrimental effects of a self-critical personality style. Journal of Affective Disorders, 301, 30–35. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jad.2022.01.014 Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

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