
Perfectionism Rewired
How do I stop living in fear of failure? Why can't I stop overthinking? When will I feel good enough? Why am I so hard on myself? Why do I self-sabotage? Will ruminating + catastrophizing ever end?
There's a BETTER Way to Perfectionism, that's empowering highly driven, Type-A, ambitious perfectionists to OWN their perfectionistic tendencies instead of being owned by it. Perfectionism Rewired host Courtney Love Gavin (CLG) illuminates this in every episode.
Listen for fierce insights for perfectionists on exiting victim mentality, what self-sabotage *really is*, how to stop people pleasing without compromising kindness, overthinking, catastrophizing, ruminating and black and white thinking, so you can quit fighting against your perfectionistic tendencies and start enjoying the life you've worked so hard to create.
Perfectionism Rewired podcast provides answers to questions like:
- Self worth vs self esteem
- Why am I overthinking
- How to increase self confidence
- What causes perfectionism anxiety
- Why am i so hard on myself
- Am I A Perfectionist
- WTF is Interoception? Does It Build Resilience?
- how to rewire your brain
Being a perfectionist is very powerful. But only if you know how to leverage it. For more on optimizing your perfectionism go to https://courtneylovegavin.com
Latest episodes

Jul 21, 2024 • 19min
What Fear of Failure is Masking
You've been thinking about fear of failure all wrong. Get it right and find out what fear of failure is protecting you from, the underlying reasons behind fear of failure, the sneaky ways fear of failure shows up for perfectionists, what fear of failure really is (not good enough) why popular advice for overcoming fear of failure isn’t helpful for perfectionists and practical steps you can take today to dissolve this pattern.On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your family on vacation or turning down the volume on self-criticism, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized Episode 234 Timestamps:00:57-Sneaky Ways Fear of Failure Shows Up For Perfectionists02:32-What Are You Waiting For?04:47-Protecting Subconscious Mind From Feeling Inadequate05:40-Black and White Thinking06:17-Fear of Inadequacy07:44-Procrastination and Indecision09:34-Surfing Through Fear of Failure10:25-Growth vs Fixed Mindset11:32-Cognitive Dissonance in Perfectionism14:06-Solving and Evolving Through Mistakes16:46-Discovering the Only Problem You Have + Solving It
Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Jul 13, 2024 • 15min
The Crucial Role of Perfectionism Coaching for Women in Leadership
Ever feel like you're constantly walking a tightrope? Expected to be confident but not too intimidating. Be assertive, but don't get aggressive. As women in leadership we've developed coping mechanisms to navigate these obstacles - like over-preparing, always getting it right and making sure we're well liked. These strategies have kept us afloat, but at what cost? Putting our careers ahead of our values, keeping one eye on the inbox even at the playground. So, how do we break free from this cycle? How do we burn bright without burning out and lead without losing ourselves? Your answers are inside this episode. . On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your family on vacation or turning down the volume on self-criticism, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized
Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Jul 10, 2024 • 9min
How Proving Yourself is Career Poison (+ the Cure for Unrivaled Growth)
Discover why proving yourself is career poison, how to recognize the hidden, nuanced ways proving shows up (like when you put $$ in tip jar) and what lies beneath this constant pressure to constantly prove yourself. Finally get to the source of why even when you're at the top of your game, what's driving you to overwork, question your value and seek validation at every turn. On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your family on vacation or turning down the volume on self-criticism, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized
Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Jul 5, 2024 • 19min
The REAL Reason Your Inner Critic Won't Shut Up
Did I make the wrong choice? Why does this bother me so much? Am I letting them down? What if I fail? Spinning in self-judgement and second guessing every small move you make, your brain won't stop replaying magnifying your mistakes. Find out the REAL reason your inner critic won't shut up and how to start asking better questions so you can feel better right NOW.On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your family on vacation or turning down the volume on self-criticism, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized Resources Mentioned In Ep. 231Episode on the science of how your brain answers questions (Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 39)Questions To Ask Yourself For Instant Excellence (Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 23)
Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Jun 27, 2024 • 19min
Feeling Clenchy? Fascinating Connection Btwn Your Pelvic Floor + Perfectionism
Discover the clues you’re clenching that you’d NEVER GUESS are rooted in your perfectionistic tendencies. Plus how Perfectionism Optimized client Molly reversed her Osteoporosis diagnosis and regained her sex drive. Learn why we clench, what’s happening inside your body + brain, the 5 core pillars key to releasing the clench You don't have to white knuckle your perfectionism. And if you feel like you are, I invite you to come coach with me 1-on-1 inside Perfectionism Optimized, where you'll learn how to take charge of your perfectionistic tendencies, which means you'll finally feel as awesome as your life looks and stop trying to control everyone in your orbit. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized Perfectionism Rewired ep. 411 on Fasciahttps://perfectionismrewired.com/episode/fascia-the-missing-puzzle-piece-for-perfectionists Truth + Accuracy Brought To You By:Chiara Ghetti, Skoczylas, L. C., Oliphant, S. S., Nikolajski, C., & Lowder, J. L. (2015). The Emotional Burden of Pelvic Organ Prolapse in Women Seeking Treatment. Female Pelvic Medicine & Reconstructive Surgery, 21(6), 332–338. https://doi.org/10.1097/spv.0000000000000190Khan, Z. A., C. Whittal, S. Mansol, Osborne, L. A., Reed, P., & Emery, S. (2013). Effect of depression and anxiety on the success of pelvic floor muscle training for pelvic floor dysfunction. Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology, 33(7), 710–714. https://doi.org/10.3109/01443615.2013.813913Taple, B. J., Griffith, J. W., Weaver, C., & Kenton, K. S. (2020). Enhancing behavioral treatment for women with pelvic floor disorders: Study protocol for a pilot randomized controlled trial. Contemporary Clinical Trials Communications, 17, 100514–100514. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.conctc.2019.100514
Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Jun 23, 2024 • 16min
How to Prevent Passing Anxiety on to Your Kids
Signs you’re programming your kids for anxiety without knowing it, how children pick up anxiety from perfectionistic parents, why traditional methods like therapy are 15x slower at achieving results, what *actually works* for caring, busy, perfectionist parents who want a physiology of excellence and how developing a physiology of excellence gives you unrivaled resilience, presence, and emotional intelligenceOn paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimizedPreventing passing of anxiety to your kids starts with understanding how your own physiology affects theirs. Children are always parroting you, especially how you carry worry, anxiety and guilt. Making it vital to learn how to metabolize your emotions efficiently with daily practices instead of shutting down or sweeping it under the rug. Learn how implementing a daily hygiene practice, like the patented E.P.I.C. Skills framework, you free up energy for what matters most and create a healthier environment for your whole family. Perfectionism Rewired episode 411 on Fasciahttps://perfectionismrewired.com/episode/fascia-the-missing-puzzle-piece-for-perfectionists Truth + Accuracy Brought To You By:Bordoni, B., & Simonelli, M. (2018). The Awareness of the Fascial System. Curēus. https://doi.org/10.7759/cureus.3397Langevin, H. M. (2022). Making Connections to Improve Health Outcomes - Helene M. Langevin, 2022. Retrieved June 22, 2024, from Global Advances in Health and Medicine website: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/2164957X221079792Lesondak, D. (2018, April 6). Fascia: What it is and Why it Matters. Retrieved June 22, 2024, from ResearchGate website: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/324261326_Fascia_What_it_is_and_Why_it_Matters
Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Jun 20, 2024 • 12min
Fascia: The Missing Puzzle Piece for Perfectionists
Fascia is the Wi-Fi of your insides, with over 250 million sensory receptors weaving through its matrix - it’s how emotions are made and where we feel our sensations, instincts and intuition. But if you tend to overthink, ruminate, catastrophize or stress out, you're compromising your fascia which impacts your body's ability to function optimally + think clearly. Discover why fascia is the missing puzzle piece for perfectionists and how to detect if there's dead zones in your own fascial network- where your sensations, instincts and intuition intersect. On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimized EP 228 TIMESTAMPS:01:38-The Role of Fascia in Mental Clarity and Confidence02:10-Where fascia is found and its impact on your body03:03-Fascia's Role in Breaking Generational Belief Patterns04:06-How fascia sends and receives information at the speed of light05:01-Wi-Fi of your Insights + Intuition06:10-What Skin is to Touch, Fascia is to Your Feelings07:25-How To 10x Your Emotional Intelligence09:18-The flexibility of fascia for quick improvements10:15-Benefits of upgrading your fascia's communication system. Truth + Accuracy Brought To You By:Bordoni, B., & Marelli, F. (2017). Emotions in Motion: Myofascial Interoception. Complementary Medicine Research, 24(2), 110–113. https://doi.org/10.1159/000464149Bordoni, B., & Simonelli, M. (2018). The Awareness of the Fascial System. Curēus. https://doi.org/10.7759/cureus.3397Fede, C., Petrelli, L., Guidolin, D., Porzionato, A., Pirri, C., Fan, C., … Stecco, C. (2021). Evidence of a new hidden neural network into deep fasciae. Scientific Reports, 11(1). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41598-021-92194-zPalomero-Gallagher, N., & Katrin Amunts. (2021). A short review on emotion processing: a lateralized network of neuronal networks. Brain Structure & Function, 227(2), 673–684. https://doi.org/10.1007/s00429-021-02331-7
Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Jun 15, 2024 • 12min
The Most Important De-Stress Skill for Perfectionists
Stressed out, frustrated or having trouble sleeping? Stress is physiological for perfectionists and our physiological stress impacts our brain, our ability to speak, to think and our emotional agility. So if you want to have the ability to take charge of perfectionism, you gotta solve stress at the source. Bc you don't have time to do 20 minutes of deep breathing when stressors pop up, you need a personalized process that works instantaneously fast. And that's the first thing I teach Perfectionism Optimized clients, how to de-stress level in any moment, so they can get back in charge. Discover how to solve stress at the source and the exact clues to identify if you need a process to help you handle your stress ASAP.On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Apply today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimizedMentioned In This Episode:Why Perfectionists Burnout (Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 176)When Deep Breaths Aren't Enough (Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 192)EP 227 TIMESTAMPS:00:00-The Most Important De-Stress Skill Nobody Taught You00:47-Why Intellectual Solutions Don't Ease Stress02:10-The Impact of Stress on the Body's Systems03:55-The Looming Shadow of Chronic Stress06:38-Recognizing Stress Eruptions07:30-Patterns of Self-Destructive Stress Behavior09:48-Physical Manifestations of Unresolved Stress11:17-Rewiring Perfectionistic HabitsTruth + Accuracy Sources:Chu, B., Marwaha, K., Sanvictores, T., Awosika, A. O., & Ayers, D. (2024, May 7). Physiology, Stress Reaction. Retrieved June 14, 2024, from Nih.gov website: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK541120/Handley, A. K., Egan, S. J., Kane, R. T., & Rees, C. S. (2014). The relationships between perfectionism, pathological worry and generalised anxiety disorder. BMC Psychiatry, 14(1). https://doi.org/10.1186/1471-244x-14-98Larijani, Roja, and Mohammad Ali Besharat. “Perfectionism and Coping Styles with Stress.” Procedia—Social and Behavioral Sciences 5 (2010): 623–27. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.sbspro.2010.07.154Sirois, F. M., J. Monforton, and M. Simpson. “If Only I Had Done Better: Perfectionism and the Functionality of Counterfactual Thinking.” Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin 36, no. 12 (2010): 1675–92. https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167210387614.
Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Jun 13, 2024 • 12min
From Pushing Through To Presence (lessons from perfectionist architect)
Racing through your days on hyper-speed but still not present for any of it? Discover how high-achieving architect Jessica went from pushing through "everything will be better once..." to being present during the most challenging time of her life, her mother’s passing. Hear from Jessica how Perfectionism Optimized coaching gave her the tools to stop the worry/wish cycle, metabolize her stress an handle excruciating times with confidence and grace, and why it's "the best thing I've ever done for myself, I think, in my entire life."On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your family on vacation or turning down the volume on self-criticism, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimizedEpisode 226 Timestamps:00:41-Pushing Through: Super Ineffective Perfectionistic Strategy01:32-Recognizing Pushing Through in Your Own Life03:00-The Exhausting Game of "Whack a Mole"04:54-Chasing the Illusion of "Once It Gets Better"05:54-Living in Fast Forward or Slow Motion07:58-Being Present For Meaningful Moments09:04-Fueling Fierce Ambition in a Grounded Way10:53-How To Be More Present
Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Jun 12, 2024 • 10min
On Vacation, Can't Relax
Feeling like you can't relax on vacation? As perfectionists the way we relax is completely different than other people. Learn why and how to start relaxing on your own terms.On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, PRESENCE with your family on vacation or turning down the volume on self-criticism, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/optimizedListen To The Full Episode To Learn:Why You Can't Relax on VacationStep-by-step to stop putting pressure on yourselfHow to cultivate the skill of relaxingEpisode 225 Timestamps:00:00-Why Perfectionists Struggle to Relax on Vacation01:45-Athleticism of Relaxing: Training Your Mind to Unwind05:41-How can I clear my mind and relax06:50-Dissolve Pressure and Anxiety While Relaxing08:53-Getting an A+ in Relaxing as a Perfectionist
Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.