Perfectionism Rewired

You’re doing everything right. You’re ambitious, successful + driven. So why is it your energy is nonexistent, patience is razor-thin + your mind can't stop overthinking? If your days are starting with dread and ending in exhaustion — this episode is your wake-up call. On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or accessing your abilities in a way burnt out you could never compete with, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewire In this Episode You’ll Learn:How pushing through dewires your brain into survival modeWhat caffeine, people pleasing + Top Ramen have in common16 surprising signs your brain is starvingWhy ruminating and indecisiveness are symptoms—not problems to solveHow a healthy Person Account™ allows you to access your abilities in a way burnt out you could never compete with Resources Mentioned In Episode 253:Recharge your Person Account Book your Perfect Start 1:1 session nowMagic Skill for Control of Emotions [Neuroscience Series #1] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 248How Perfectionist Brain *Actually* Works [Neuroscience Series #2] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 249Can't Stop Ruminating? Here's Why [Neuroscience Series #3] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 250Neuroplasticity  [Neuroscience Series #4] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 251#1 Thing Stops Perfectionists From Growth [Neuroscience Series #5] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 252  TIMESTAMPS:02:09-Why Perfectionists Need More Fuel for Our Brains04:10-MYTH: You Have to Stop Being a Perfectionist06:24-Clues You’re on the Path to Chronic Stress09:32-Burn Out is Not the Price of Ambition10:25-Case Study: How Stacey found Clarity, Energy, Peace12:43-I Ruminate Over Decisions bc I Need to Make the Right Decision14:05-Why You’re Choosing Instant Relief (and Paying Later)16:11-A Healthy Person Account™ = Liberation17:32-How to Always Know How Your Person Account™ is Doing  Citations/Sources:Barrett, L. F. (2017). How emotions are made: The secret life of the brain. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.Barrett, L. F., Quigley, K. S., & Hamilton, P. (2016). An active inference theory of allostasis and interoception in depression. *Philosophical Transactions of the Royal Society B: Biological Sciences*, *371*(1708), 20160011. https://doi.org/10.1098/rstb.2016.0011Bobba-Alves, N., Juster, R.-P., & Picard, M. (2022). The energetic cost of allostasis and allostatic load. Psychoneuroendocrinology, 146, 105951. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.psyneuen.2022.105951Dwyer, P. (2022). The Neurodiversity Approach(es): What Are They and What Do They Mean for Researchers? Human Development, 66(2), 73–92. https://doi.org/10.1159/000523723Ganzel, B. L., & Morris, P. A. (2011). Allostasis and the developing human brain: Explicit consideration of implicit models. Development and Psychopathology, 23(4), 955–974. https://doi.org/10.1017/s0954579411000447‌Guidi, J., Lucente, M., Sonino, N., & Fava, Giovanni A. (2020). Allostatic Load and Its Impact on Health: A Systematic Review. Psychotherapy and Psychosomatics, 90(1), 11–27. https://doi.org/10.1159/000510696Kleckner, I. R., Zhang, J., Touroutoglou, A., Chanes, L., Xia, C., Simmons, W. K., Quigley, K. S., Dickerson, B. C., & Feldman Barrett, L. (2017). Evidence for a large-scale brain system supporting allostasis and interoception in humans. Nature Human Behaviour, 1(5). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41562-017-0069Knezevic, E., Katarina Nenic, Milanovic, V., & Knezevic, N. N. (2023). The Role of Cortisol in Chronic Stress, Neurodegenerative Diseases, and Psychological Disorders. Cells, 12(23), 2726–2726. https://doi.org/10.3390/cells12232726‌McEwen, B. S., & Gianaros, P. J. (2011). Stress- and Allostasis-Induced Brain Plasticity. Annual Review of Medicine, 62(1), 431–445. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev-med-052209-100430 Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Feel like you're working hard but not seeing the progress you want? It's NOT YOU or your PERFECTIONISM – it's your Person Account™ . Discover my proprietary framework that’s changing the game for Perfectionist Solution’s clients, and will do the same for you.  In this Episode You’ll Learn:How ruminating + running a 10k impact you the exact same wayWhy perfectionist brains work overtime + cost more to operateHow to tell if you’re operating in a constant state of depletion without realizing itWhat Cortisol actually is (it's NOT a STRESS HORMONE)The hidden reason therapy + personal development don't work On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewire Resources Mentioned In Episode 252:Perfect Start SessionMagic Skill for Control of Emotions [Neuroscience Series #1] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 248How Perfectionist Brain *Actually* Works [Neuroscience Series #2] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 249Can't Stop Ruminating? Here's Why [Neuroscience Series #3] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 250  TIMESTAMPS:0:53-Why You're Not Making Progress Despite Trying Harder02:15-Allostasis: How Your Brain Allocates05:07-The Hidden Reason Therapy Isn’t Working06:30-Why Perfectionist Brains Cost More to Operate07:25-Living in a Depleted State Without Realizing It09:31-Stressed out: Eustress vs. Distress10:29-Truth about Cortisol + Stress Response12:35-The Slow Drip of Perfectionist Burnout15:17-How to Tell if You’re Running on Empty  Citations/Sources:Barrett, L. F. (2017). How emotions are made: The secret life of the brain. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.Bobba-Alves, N., Juster, R.-P., & Picard, M. (2022). The energetic cost of allostasis and allostatic load. Psychoneuroendocrinology, 146, 105951. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.psyneuen.2022.105951Dwyer, P. (2022). The Neurodiversity Approach(es): What Are They and What Do They Mean for Researchers? Human Development, 66(2), 73–92. https://doi.org/10.1159/000523723Ganzel, B. L., & Morris, P. A. (2011). Allostasis and the developing human brain: Explicit consideration of implicit models. Development and Psychopathology, 23(4), 955–974. https://doi.org/10.1017/s0954579411000447‌Guidi, J., Lucente, M., Sonino, N., & Fava, Giovanni A. (2020). Allostatic Load and Its Impact on Health: A Systematic Review. Psychotherapy and Psychosomatics, 90(1), 11–27. https://doi.org/10.1159/000510696Kleckner, I. R., Zhang, J., Touroutoglou, A., Chanes, L., Xia, C., Simmons, W. K., Quigley, K. S., Dickerson, B. C., & Feldman Barrett, L. (2017). Evidence for a large-scale brain system supporting allostasis and interoception in humans. Nature Human Behaviour, 1(5). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41562-017-0069Knezevic, E., Katarina Nenic, Milanovic, V., & Knezevic, N. N. (2023). The Role of Cortisol in Chronic Stress, Neurodegenerative Diseases, and Psychological Disorders. Cells, 12(23), 2726–2726. https://doi.org/10.3390/cells12232726‌McEwen, B. S., & Gianaros, P. J. (2011). Stress- and Allostasis-Induced Brain Plasticity. Annual Review of Medicine, 62(1), 431–445. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev-med-052209-100430 Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewire In this Episode You’ll Learn:How neuroplasticity works and why it’s crucial for perfectionistsThe surprising difference in brain flexibility before and after age 45Real-life coaching breakthroughs that prove brain rewiring is possibleWhy *use it or lose it* is the key to changing perfectionist tendenciesThe fastest way to stop rumination, self-doubt and overanalyzing mistakes Resources Mentioned In Episode 251:Take your first step in rewiring Perfect Start Introductory SessionMagic Skill for Control of Emotions [Neuroscience Series #1] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 248How Perfectionist Brain *Actually* Works [Neuroscience Series #2] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 249Can't Stop Ruminating? Here's Why [Neuroscience Series #3] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 250 TIMESTAMPS:00:00-Why Age 45 Is a Brain Plasticity Tipping Point01:07-Analogy for what is neuroplasticity02:52-Rewire your brain with Perfect Start Session05:29-Framework for Rewiring Perfectionism Inside Out06:10-Transformative Effects of Cognitive Flexibility Citations/Sources:Cramer, S. C., Sur, M., Dobkin, B. H., C. O'Brien, Sanger, T. D., Trojanowski, J. Q., … Haber, S. (2011). Harnessing neuroplasticity for clinical applications. Brain, 134(6), 1591–1609. https://doi.org/10.1093/brain/awr039Fuchs, E., & Flügge, G. (2014). Adult Neuroplasticity: More Than 40 Years of Research. Neural Plasticity, 2014, 1–10. https://doi.org/10.1155/2014/541870Green, C. S., & Bavelier, D. (2008). Exercising your brain: A review of human brain plasticity and training-induced learning. Psychology and Aging, 23(4), 692–701. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0014345Isheqlou, L.K., Soltanlou, M., Zarean, M., Saeedi, M.T. and Heysieattalab, S. (2023). Feedback-related negativity in perfectionists: An index of performance outcome evaluation. Behavioural Brain Research, 444, 114358–114358. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.bbr.2023.114358Petersen, J., Ong, C. W., Hancock, A. S., Gillam, R. B., Levin, M. E., & Twohig, M. P. (2021). An Examination of the Relationship Between Perfectionism and Neurological Functioning. Journal of Cognitive Psychotherapy, 35(3), 195–211. https://doi.org/10.1891/jcpsy-d-20-00037‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

"Part of the reason I stay super busy is bc if I stop to rest l'll ruminate. And if I ruminate, I start spiraling. And if I spiraling I'm like a nosediving plane" Sound familiar? Discover the ANSWER to WHY you get stuck in your most annoying perfectionist tendencies, like ruminating, catastrophizing, overthinking every small mistake etc. Plus the 6 reasons your perfectionist brain holds on to outdated habits,  how chronic stress impacts your brain’s ability to change, the role of back and white thinking in reinforcing unhelpful neural pathways, why past experiences trick your brain into seeing danger everywhere and how to stop your worries from becoming self-fulfilling prophecies.  On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewire TIMESTAMPS:00:00–How to finally take charge of ruminating02:16–Missed the last episode? Here’s a quick recap04:06–What happens when your brain gets it wrong06:09–Why perfectionist brains resists learning from mistakes07:40–6 sneaky reasons your brain ignores new info08:23–How chronic stress keeps your brain stuck10:20–Why your brain clings to old patterns11:42–The hidden reason you avoid discomfort12:51–When your brain blows things out of proportion13:49–How black-and-white thinking is like wearing blinders15:19–Why past experiences warp your reactions19:34–How to update your brain so you can get unstuck21:09–One small shift to start seeing change today The first step in rewiring Resources Mentioned In Episode 250:Take your first step in rewiring Perfect Start Introductory SessionMagic Skill for Control of Emotions [Neuroscience Series #1] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 248How Perfectionist Brain *Actually* Works [Neuroscience Series #2] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 249When Taking A Few Deep Breaths Isn't Enough Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 192Will Save Your Sanity(might change your life) Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 193 Citations/Sources:Bar, M. (2009). The proactive brain: memory for predictions. Philosophical Transactions of the Royal Society B Biological Sciences, 364(1521), 1235–1243. https://doi.org/10.1098/rstb.2008.0310Barrett, L. F., & Simmons, W. K. (2015). Interoceptive predictions in the brain. Nature Reviews Neuroscience, 16(7), 419–429. https://doi.org/10.1038/nrn3950Braem, S., Coenen, E., Klaas Bombeke, Bochove, van, & Wim Notebaert. (2015). Open your eyes for prediction errors. Cognitive Affective & Behavioral Neuroscience, 15(2), 374–380. https://doi.org/10.3758/s13415-014-0333-4Clark, A. (2013). Whatever next? Predictive brains, situated agents, and the future of cognitive science. Behavioral and Brain Sciences, 36(3), 181–204. https://doi.org/10.1017/s0140525x12000477Handley, A. K., Egan, S. J., Kane, R. T., & Rees, C. S. (2014). The relationships between perfectionism, pathological worry and generalised anxiety disorder. BMC Psychiatry, 14(1). https://doi.org/10.1186/1471-244x-14-98Kummer, K., Mattes, A. & Stahl, J. Do perfectionists show negative, repetitive thoughts facing uncertain situations?. Curr Psychol (2023). https://doi.org/10.1007/s12144-023-04409-3Lital Yosopov, Saklofske, D. H., Smith, M. M., Flett, G. L., & Hewitt, P. L. (2024). Failure Sensitivity in Perfectionism and Procrastination: Fear of Failure and Overgeneralization of Failure as Mediators of Traits and Cognitions. Journal of Psychoeducational Assessment, 42(6), 705–724. https://doi.org/10.1177/07342829241249784Mattes, A., Mück, M., & Stahl, J. (2022). Perfectionism-related variations in error processing in a task with increased response selection complexity. Personality Neuroscience, 5. https://doi.org/10.1017/pen.2022.3‌McNally, G. P., Johansen, J. P., & Blair, H. T. (2011). Placing prediction into the fear circuit. *Trends in Neurosciences*, *34*(6), 283–292. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tins.2011.03.005‌Meyer, A., & Wissemann, K. (2020). Controlling parenting and perfectionism is associated with an increased error-related negativity (ERN) in young adults. *Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience*, *15*(1), 87–95. https://doi.org/10.1093/scan/nsaa018‌Roy, M., Shohamy, D., Daw, N., Jepma, M., Wimmer, G. E., & Wager, T. D. (2014). Representation of aversive prediction errors in the human periaqueductal gray. *Nature Neuroscience*, *17*(11), 1607–1612. https://doi.org/10.1038/nn.3832‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Uncover why being super rigid, ruminating, overthinking, people pleasing, over-preparing, excessively worrying — are signs your perfectionistic brain is misfiring. Plus, learn the neuroscience-backed solution to take charge of your perfectionism instead of letting it rule you.On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or becoming JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewireTIMESTAMPS:00:00-What Makes Perfectionistic Brains Unique04:02-How The Brain Works
07:32-Neuroscience Behind Overthinking
09:25-Catastrophizing Your Way to Chronic Stress
10:37-Ruminate + 11 Signs Using Your Brain Incorrectly11:58-Neuroplasticy to rewire the brain14:03-What Gets In The Way of Rewiring15:59-Black + White ThinkingResources Mentioned In Episode 249:Perfect Start Introductory Session Single Coaching SessionCatastrophizing Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 188Catastrophize. Ruminate. Overthink. Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 216Will Save Your Sanity(might change your life) Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 193Citations/Sources:Braem, S., Coenen, E., Klaas Bombeke, Bochove, van, & Wim Notebaert. (2015). Open your eyes for prediction errors. Cognitive Affective & Behavioral Neuroscience, 15(2), 374–380. https://doi.org/10.3758/s13415-014-0333-4Handley, A. K., Egan, S. J., Kane, R. T., & Rees, C. S. (2014). The relationships between perfectionism, pathological worry and generalised anxiety disorder. BMC Psychiatry, 14(1). https://doi.org/10.1186/1471-244x-14-98Mattes, A., Mück, M., & Stahl, J. (2022). Perfectionism-related variations in error processing in a task with increased response selection complexity. Personality Neuroscience, 5. https://doi.org/10.1017/pen.2022.3‌‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Feeling overwhelmed? Stressed out? Anxious? Being vague about your emotions is like saying you're "craving food" for dinner—utterly unhelpful! Your perfectionist brain needs precision to create the right action plan for you. Learn why labeling your emotions accurately is crucial for regulating your body's responses and the essential skillset all perfectionists need to understand their emotions, what the feelings mean and what to do about them, guided by the latest neuroscience research.On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or becoming JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewire TIMESTAMPS:01:08-Controlling of emotions03:13-How to stop feeling overwhelmed05:28-Muffin-Cupcake Experiment07:54-Why Words Hold Physiological Power09:48-Emotional Regulation skills12:14-What the skill of emotional granularity buys you14:23-How to rewire your brain15:27-Becoming an Emotional Sommelier18:52-How do you construct your emotions more accurately? Resources Mentioned In Episode 248:Perfect Start Introductory Session Single Coaching SessionAvoiding Perfectionist Mistakes in Expressing Emotions Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 173Will Save Your Sanity(might change your life) Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 193Everything You Need to Know About Self Regulation as a Perfectionist  Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 194 Citations/Sources:Barrett, L. F. (2017). How emotions are made: The secret life of the brain. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.Barrett, L. F. (2016). The theory of constructed emotion: an active inference account of interoception and categorization. Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience, nsw154–nsw154. https://doi.org/10.1093/scan/nsw154Barrett, L. F., Gross, J., Christensen, T. C., & Benvenuto, M. (2001). Knowing what you're feeling and knowing what to do about it: Mapping the relation between emotion differentiation and emotion regulation. Cognition and Emotion, 15(6), 713–724. https://doi.org/10.1080/02699930143000239‌Crum, A. J., Corbin, W. R., Brownell, K. D., & Salovey, P. (2011). Mind over milkshakes: Mindsets, not just nutrients, determine ghrelin response. Health Psychology, 30(4), 424–429. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0023467Gendron, M., Lindquist, K. A., Barsalou, L., & Barrett, L. F. (2012). Emotion words shape emotion percepts. Emotion, 12(2), 314–325. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0026007Hoemann, K., Gendron, M., & Barrett, L. F. (2022). Assessing the Power of Words to Facilitate Emotion Category Learning. Affective Science, 3(1), 69–80. https://doi.org/10.1007/s42761-021-00084-4Hoemann, K., Khan, Z., Kamona, N., Dy, J., Barrett, L. F., & Quigley, K. S. (2021). Investigating the relationship between emotional granularity and cardiorespiratory physiological activity in daily life. Psychophysiology, 58(6). https://doi.org/10.1111/psyp.13818Hoemann, K., Lee, Y., Kuppens, P., Gendron, M., & Boyd, R. L. (2023). Emotional Granularity is Associated with Daily Experiential Diversity. Affective Science, 4(2), 291–306. https://doi.org/10.1007/s42761-023-00185-2Hoemann, K., Nielson, C., Yuen, A., Gurera, J. W., Quigley, K. S., & Barrett, L. F. (2021). Expertise in emotion: A scoping review and unifying framework for individual differences in the mental representation of emotional experience. Psychological Bulletin, 147(11), 1159–1183. https://doi.org/10.1037/bul0000327Satpute, A. B., Nook, E. C., Narayanan, S., Shu, J., Weber, J., & Ochsner, K. N. (2016). Emotions in "Black and White" or Shades of Gray? How We Think About Emotion Shapes Our Perception and Neural Representation of Emotion. Psychological science, 27(11), 1428–1442. https://doi.org/10.1177/0956797616661555Westlin, C., Theriault, J. E., Yuta Katsumi, Nieto-Castanon, A., Kucyi, A., Ruf, S. F., … Barrett, L. F. (2023). Improving the study of brain-behavior relationships by revisiting basic assumptions. Trends in Cognitive Sciences, 27(3), 246–257. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tics.2022.12.015‌‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

It’s impossible to stop self-comparison as a perfectionist. You.Are.Going.To.Compare.Yourself and here’s the best way to do it! Discover 6 empowering ways to rewire unhealthy self-comparisons, perfectionism trash trades, how to tell if you’re fear-based striving, live coaching on 4 IRL examples of comparing, the only skillset you need for this to work 100% of the time  and a tool to instantly upgrade comparing yourself  On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or becoming JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewire TIMESTAMPS:01:26-Choosing Your Response to Comparisons03:07-The Skill Set of CAKE05:41-Trash Trades in Perfectionism06:55-Healthy vs. Unhealthy Comparisons08:47-How to Reframe Self-Critical Thoughts09:25-Breaking Free from Fear-Based Striving10:49-Living in the Present, Not the Future15:52-What Self-Comparisons Actually Reveal17:39-Tool to instantly upgrade comparing yourself21:48-How Tiny, Mighty Progress Fuels You Resources Mentioned In Episode 247:Perfect Start Introductory Session Single Coaching SessionComparing Yourself [PART ONE] Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 245How Can I Stop Comparing Myself [PART TWO] Perfectionism Rewired Eo. 246Meeting Yourself Where You Are Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 187Will Save Your Sanity(might change your life) Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 193 Citations/Sources:Olson, J. M., Buhrmann, O., & Roese, N. J. (2000). Comparing Comparisons. Handbook of Social Comparison, 379–398. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-1-4615-4237-7_18Sirois, F.M., Monforton, J. and Simpson, M. (2010) "If Only I Had Done Better": Perfectionism and the Functionality of Counterfactual Thinking. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin , 36 (12). 1675 - 1692. ISSN 0146-1672 https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167210387614Stoeber, J., & Diedenhofen, B. (2017). Multidimensional perfectionism and counterfactual thinking: Some think upward, others downward. Personality and Individual Differences, 119, 118–121. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2017.07.009‌‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT. Press play.Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Tactical "stop it" approaches to self-comparison DO NOT WORK for perfectionists. Find out WHY along with the hidden costs of comparing yourself, why the approach you’ve taken to stopping self-comparison hasn't worked, what you actually need to do and scientifically what causes perfectionists to have an even harder time than non-perfectionistic people in rewiring this habit. On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or becoming JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewire TIMESTAMPS:00:00-Why self comparison tactics fail perfectionists01:41-The hidden costs of comparing yourself06:31-Recognize self comparison as a type of self punishment.10:11-Why intellect isn't enough to rewire perfectionist tendencies12:13-Developing skill sets over gathering knowledge15:00-Why it's scientifically harder for perfectionists to stop unhealthy self-comparison16:08-Acceptance vs. judgment in rewiring perfectionism18:00-What Silver vs. bronze medalists show us about comparing yourself to others21:30-Choosing growth over fear of failure Resources Mentioned In Episode 246:Perfect Start Introductory Session Single Coaching SessionComparing Yourself (pt.1) Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 245Discovering Your Hidden Motivators Perfectionism Rewired  Ep. 80Intrinsic Motivational Patterns Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 66 Citations/Sources:Curran, T., & Hill, A. P. (2019). Perfectionism is increasing over time: A meta-analysis of birth cohort differences from 1989 to 2016. Psychological Bulletin, 145(4), 410–429. https://doi.org/10.1037/bul0000138  Sirois, F.M., Monforton, J. and Simpson, M. (2010) "If Only I Had Done Better": Perfectionism and the Functionality of Counterfactual Thinking. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin , 36 (12). 1675 - 1692. ISSN 0146-1672 https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167210387614Stoeber, J., & Diedenhofen, B. (2017). Multidimensional perfectionism and counterfactual thinking: Some think upward, others downward. Personality and Individual Differences, 119, 118–121. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2017.07.009‌‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.

Comparing yourself all the time? Tired of feeling like you never quite measure up...no matter how much you accomplish? It's not just YOU! Discover the sneaky specific ways self-comparison shows up for perfectionists, the difference between self-awareness + self-coaching, why self-comparison is not your fault but is your responsibility to change.  On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or becoming JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewireTIMESTAMPS:00:00-How you can stop comparing yourself to others02:32-The Annoying Problem with Surface-Level Self Comparison Tips03:46-Self Awareness vs. Self Coaching: What's the Difference?05:34-Dangers of DIY Approaches to Rewiring Perfectionism07:25-Why “How To Stop COmparing Yourself To Others” tips backfire for perfectionists12:10-Comparing Insides to Outsides Never Adds Up14:13-Moving the goalposts17:49-Punishment vs. Discipline: Changing Behaviors without Pain19:31-Understanding the Why Behind Your Perfectionistic TendenciesResources Mentioned In Episode 245:Perfect Start Introductory Session Single Coaching SessionBe Proud of Yourself Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 237Chasing Validation Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 236Proving Yourself At Work Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 232Citations/Sources:McCarthy, P. A., Meyer, T., Back, M. D., & Morina, N. (2023). How we compare: A new approach to assess aspects of the comparison process for appearance-based standards and their associations with individual differences in wellbeing and personality measures. PLOS ONE, 18(1), e0280072–e0280072. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0280072White, J. B., Langer, E. J., Yariv, L., & Welch, J. C. (2006). Frequent Social Comparisons and Destructive Emotions and Behaviors: The Dark Side of Social Comparisons. Journal of Adult Development, 13(1), 36–44. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10804-006-9005-0Zhou, Y., Yang, Y., Jiang, H., & Guo, C. (2025). Self-comparison versus social-comparison: The impact of imperfection on executive function in perfectionists. Personality and Individual Differences, 234, 112965. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2024.112965‌‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.