
Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel
Every Monday morning step into the office of iconic psychotherapist Esther Perel and listen in as real people in search of insight bare the raw, intimate, and profound details of their stories. From breakups and open relationships to workplace conflicts and fractures in the family, it’s a place to hear our own stories reflected in the lives of others. So…where should we begin? Part of the Vox Media Podcast Network.
Latest episodes

126 snips
Dec 16, 2024 • 55min
Esther Calling - I Don't Want to Turn Into My Mother
A young mother grapples with her complex feelings towards her own mother, exploring themes of resentment and empathy in parenthood. The conversation dives deep into the struggle of breaking generational cycles while establishing healthy boundaries. Emotional ties and the impact of upbringing are dissected, highlighting the challenges of navigating familial expectations. With a focus on self-acceptance and gratitude, the discussion offers insights into redefining relationships and the importance of communication in nurturing parent-child dynamics.

29 snips
Dec 2, 2024 • 50min
Esther Calling - Grief is Like a Fingerprint
The conversation delves into the intricate emotions surrounding grief after losing loved ones to suicide. It emphasizes the unique ways individuals process sorrow, exploring feelings of anger, love, and the beauty found in pain. Personal rituals and shared remembrances are highlighted as crucial for healing. Listeners are invited to reflect on their own experiences, fostering a supportive community. Overall, the discussion underscores the importance of open dialogue and recognizing the complexities of familial connections in the wake of loss.

110 snips
Nov 18, 2024 • 59min
Say More - Esther Perel on Fantasy with Gillian Anderson
Join award-winning actress Gillian Anderson, known for her captivating roles in 'The X-Files' and 'Sex Education', as she delves into the world of women's erotic fantasies. She and Esther explore how these fantasies reveal deep emotional and psychological desires, often influenced by personal history and societal norms. They also discuss the empowering aspects of BDSM, especially for postmenopausal women, and highlight the importance of open conversations about sexuality to foster intimacy and personal acceptance. A fascinating journey into desire and self-discovery!

21 snips
Nov 11, 2024 • 1h 3min
How Many Times Can I Forgive You?
A woman grapples with betrayal and the discovery of her partner's long-hidden son. As they navigate feelings of humiliation and emotional distance, the complexities of trust and forgiveness unfold. They explore the challenges of maintaining connection amidst infidelity and childhood wounds. The conversation touches on caregiving dynamics, the struggle for recognition in relationships, and the intricate ties between love, grief, and healing. Personal stories reveal the lasting impact of personal experiences on relational behaviors.

22 snips
Nov 4, 2024 • 56min
Finding Love Would Mean Letting Go of Who I Am
The struggle of finding love often reveals deeper truths about identity and societal expectations. A gay Muslim man's journey highlights the tension between faith and authenticity. Listeners discover the impact of fantasy on real relationships and the importance of empathy. The conversation dives into the emotional sacrifices made for love, along with personal anecdotes of coming out and familial pressures. Ultimately, it emphasizes the power of honesty in navigating love amidst culture and belief.

8 snips
Oct 21, 2024 • 49min
Esther Calling - You Are So Not Invited to My Wedding
Navigating the tension between past and present relationships takes center stage. A young woman grapples with her fiancé's decision to invite her former abusive boss to their wedding. Emotional turmoil and authority struggles emerge, highlighting the complex dynamics of loyalty and boundaries. The conversation unpacks the intricacies of wedding guest lists and the importance of communication. With insights on emotional conflicts, it emphasizes empathy as essential for fostering understanding and resolving personal challenges.

11 snips
Oct 14, 2024 • 59min
Love the Child, Not the Father
Client 1 shares their intense journey of love, parenting, and emotional strife during the COVID lockdown. Feeling unsupported and overwhelmed, they navigate the treacherous waters of a relationship strained by unplanned parenthood. Esther Perel helps unpack the emotional complexities and power dynamics at play, emphasizing the need for flexibility and open communication. The conversation touches on breaking cycles of resentment and setting boundaries, ultimately highlighting the importance of maintaining individual identities while co-parenting.

Oct 7, 2024 • 46min
Best Friends Don't Make For the Best Bosses
Two best friends navigate the rocky terrain of turning a personal bond into a professional one. They discuss miscommunication and how it can fracture both friendship and business. The importance of honest dialogues emerges as a key theme for healing their relationship. They explore power dynamics at work and the challenge of expressing ideas when intimidation looms. Ultimately, they seek strategies to blend their personal and professional lives while maintaining clear communication and healthy boundaries.

63 snips
Sep 23, 2024 • 56min
Say More - Miranda July and Esther Perel on The Rebirth of Desire
Miranda July, a celebrated writer and artist known for her novel "All Fours," joins Esther Perel to explore the nuances of desire in modern relationships. They delve into the tension between domesticity and eroticism, discussing how vulnerability fosters emotional security. The conversation touches on sustaining intimacy over time and the delicate balance between freedom and safety in relationships. Through personal anecdotes, they highlight the intersection of identity, desire, and the complexities of communication, emphasizing the importance of self-care and exploration in reigniting passion.

36 snips
Sep 16, 2024 • 40min
Esther Calling - Why Can't I Find Someone? Is it Me?
In a candid session, Esther speaks with a woman in her thirties, who is navigating the complexities of modern dating. Despite her enthusiasm for dates, she finds herself frustrated as relationships fizzle out after a few encounters. They discuss the importance of authenticity and reframing negative self-perceptions while exploring how shared interests can lead to deeper connections. Esther offers insights on balancing optimism and exhaustion in the pursuit of love, transforming her approach to dating.