Robin Hanson is an Associate Professor of Economics at George Mason University and a Research Associate at the Future of Humanity Institute of Oxford University. His book, The Elephant In The Brain: Hidden Motives In Everyday Life, is what he and Eric discuss in this episode. They explore topics like motives, perspective, the left brain interpreter and so much more as it relates to human behavior. This episode will give you a lot of insight into yourself and others.Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Robin Hanson and I Discuss Motives, Human Behavior, and …His book, The Elephant In The Brain: Hidden Motives In Everyday LifeHow often, we keep our true motives hidden from othersThat we also keep our true motives hidden from ourselvesModularityThe things happening at a conscious as well as an unconscious levelThe left brain interpreter being like a press secretaryNeeding to tell a story about our motivesQuestioning whether or not you know the motives of othersThat we have multiple motives for doing thingsUnderstand others and then assume you’re a lot like themCynicism and MisanthropyPerspectiveThe evolution to protect ourselves from each otherThe need to have others like us and think well of usObliviationWhat if others couldn’t see what you bought – that their opinion of you wouldn’t change because of what you bought – how would that change what you’d buy?That we pay a lot for varietyProximate and distal causesThat evolution designed us to be relatively unaware of our motives – so why is it good to know about them?Robin Hanson Links:elephantinthebrain.comovercomingbias.comTwitterTed TalkWestin – their reason for being is to help you travel well – eat well, move well and sleep well. Welcome to wellness. Explore at Westin.comThe Great Courses Plus – learn more about virtually any topic – beyond the basics and even master a subject if you want to. Get one month for free at  www.thegreatcoursesplus.com/wolfTalkspace:  the online therapy company that lets you message a licensed therapist from anywhere at any time. Therapy on demand. Non-judgemental, practical help when you need it at a fraction of the cost of traditional therapy. Visit www.talkspace.com and enter Promo Code: WOLF to get $65 off your first month.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Charlie Gilkey is the author of Start Finishing: How To Go From Idea To Done. An Army veteran and near Ph.D. in philosophy, Charlie is the founder of Productive Flourishing, a company that helps professional creatives, leaders, and change-makers take meaningful action on work matters. He’s widely cited in outlets such as Inc. Magazine, Time, Forbes, The Guardian, Life Hacker and more and his work will help you discover the path from the ideas in your head to the actions you take in your daily life and the way you live out your values – and most importantly how to go about getting things done.Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Charlie Gilkey and I Discuss Getting Things Done and …His book, Start Finishing: How To Go From Idea To DoneHow kindness towards others often brings out the best in everyoneThe Tao Te ChingFocusing on your input and letting go of the resultsWhy finishing is so importantThat we only get mastery from finishing things, not halfway doing themWe don’t just improve by thinking about things, we improve by doing themCreative constipation breeds toxicity We’re either creating something or destroying somethingWe don’t do ideas, we do projectsHow it feels good to think about our ideasHow doing our best work is often really hardThe myth: if it’s meant to be for us, it’s supposed to be easyThat when you start something you’re not as good at it as you want to be and it takes time to and effort to get betterThe myth that if it doesn’t come easy for you, you shouldn’t do itDoing something until you’re good enough at it to decide whether or not you want to continue doing itThe 5 things that get in the way of doing our best workHead Trash: Doesn’t matter if a thought is true or not – it matters if we believe it or notThe problem with automatically believing our thoughtsHow discipline limits decision fatigueAction expresses priorityBeing sick isn’t a character defect – how you respond to it mattersThat big life changes take life force and energy in order for us to respond to and deal with them and that’s life force that we can’t put towards other things – and that’s okCharlie Gilkey Links:productiveflourishing.comTwitterFacebookEverlyWell: Offers more than 35 at-home lab tests with super easy to follow instructions. Results are processed in a certified lab and reviewed by board-certified physicians and are then sent directly to you within days. The EverlyWell digital platform helps break down exactly what your results mean for you plus you can also set up a free discussion with a healthcare professional to discuss them. To start learning more about your health, go to everlywell.com/wolf and enter promo code WOLF for 15% off your testPhlur – Eric created his own sampler set that you can try! Get this curated sampler set or create your own. Get 20% off your first 3 Phlur samples at Phlur.com/wolfCalm: The #1 rated app for meditation. They have meditations for anxiety, adult bedtime stories, soothing music, calm masterclasses with may One You Feed Guests. www.calm.com/wolf 25% off a Calm Premium SubscriptionIf you enjoyed this conversation with Charlie Gilkey on getting things done, you might also enjoy these other episodes:Chris BaileyDavid KadavyTim PychylSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mark Henick has appeared in hundreds of television segments and countless more radio, print and online features about mental health. Mark’s TedTalk, “Why We Choose Suicide”, is among the most-watched in the world with over 6 million views. In this episode, he tells Eric about his experience with attempts at suicide, relapsing depression and getting skillful with finding meaning and living his life. This isn’t just a broad discussion on suicide and depression – there are real, practical techniques and approaches that can be applied to life today, no matter your circumstances, to create meaning, fulfillment, and yes, even joy. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Mark Henick and I Discuss Suicide, Depression, and…The duality of life and deathMental Health and SuicideHis suicidality at 12 years oldThe message he got that he couldn’t talk about suicideThe complete stranger who saved him from jumping from a bridge at night – physically holding on to himHis realization that he didn’t have to be the suffering boy he was, he could be the stranger that helped him…that his life could be differentThe myth that if you talk about suicide it will give people the idea to do itThe right way and wrong way to talk about suicide and depressionHow freeing it is to talk about somethingWhen others told him they could relate to his story of suicide and depressionHis recovery through a newfound sense of purposeThe healthier relationships he pursuedGetting clear about boundariesThe toxic masculinity he was surrounded by as a childNot having the language to express the feelings he hadThe perceptual field and increasing your options by getting uncomfortable.How depression limits the options you can see Broadening of perception and expansion as a part of awakeningSomething good can come from most painful situations; It’s in the lens you take and the work that you do.His depression and social anxiety disorderThe danger in an avoidant coping strategy as well as the flaws of perfectionism.Realizing the cross you bear can change into meaning and how to turn your struggle into something good.Getting good at re-lapsing with his depressionHis misguided thought that he was failing at getting betterLearning to trust himself AND learning not to believe every one of his thoughtsThe truth: This too shall pass (the more you cling to it the longer it takes to pass)How depression hates a moving targetMark Henick Links:markhenick.comTed Talk: “Why We Choose Suicide”TwitterFacebookTalkspace:  the online therapy company that lets you message a licensed therapist from anywhere at any time. Therapy on demand. Non-judgemental, practical help when you need it at a fraction of the cost of traditional therapy. Visit www.talkspace.com and enter Promo Code: WOLF to get 65% off your first month.Daily Harvest – Delivers absolutely delicious organic, carefully sourced, chef-created fruit and veggie smoothies, soups, overnight oats, bowls and more. To get $25 off your first box go to www.dailyharvest.com and enter promo code: FEEDSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This mini episode is about the tactical and emotional aspects of changing behavior.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sarah Shockley is a multiple award-winning producer and director of educational films including Dancing From the Inside Out, a highly acclaimed documentary on disabled dance. Sarah is the author of a number of books on living with chronic pain, including the one discussed in this episode, The Pain Companion: Everyday Wisdom for Living with and Moving Beyond Chronic Pain.Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Sarah Shockley and I Discuss Living with Chronic Pain and…Her book, The Pain Companion: Everyday Wisdom for Living with and Moving Beyond Chronic PainHow it’s hard for us to heal when we’re in a battle with painThe good wolf aspect of painFeeding into healing vs feeding in living with chronic painHer experience with debilitating painThe many components of chronic pain – in addition to the physical componentHow isolating chronic pain can be Chronic emotional painSeeing pain differentlyTurning towards pain and asking it, “What could positively be your positive purpose here?”What you resist persistsBecoming partners with your painThinking of pain as the voice of something within you that wants to be healedCreating a different relationship with painWe lock pain in place when we get into a resistant modeGiving pain a lot of spaceBreathing into the painThe messages that pain brought herAsking pain, “What do you need?”How her life has been transformed by changing her relationship and experience with chronic painThat she wrote the book she wished she had been given in the midst of her struggle with painThat being seen in your pain can be the beginning of healingLiving with chronic pain and what she imagined her pain looking likeSarah Shockley Links:thepaincompanion.comFacebookYouTubeDoorDash – Don’t worry about dinner, let dinner come to you with DoorDash. Get $5 off your first order of $15 or more when you download the DoorDash app and enter promo code WOLFThe Great Courses Plus – learn more about virtually any topic – beyond the basics and even master a subject if you want to. Get 3 months of unlimited access to their entire library for just $30. www.thegreatcoursesplus.com/wolfIf you enjoyed this conversation with Sarah Shockley on living with chronic pain, you might also enjoy these other episodes:Toni BernhardMichael GalinskySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Eric Kaufmann guides leaders to make better decisions and achieve better results. He has consulted for hundreds of leaders including executives and team leaders at Sony, TMobile, Genentec and Alcon Labs just to name a few. He is the founder of Sagatica Inc and he serves on the board of the San Diego Zen Center. In this episode, he and Eric discuss his work of teaching conscious leadership in the workplace.Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Eric Kaufmann and I Discuss…How he interacts with his shadow sideThe key to not making a situation worseHis practice of refrain and returnConscious leadershipUnrelenting commitment to results with an unwavering regard for spiritWhat someone says they want vs what they needThe courage it takes to say noThe 3 building blocks of our egoic stateThe 3 pillars of being a conscious personWisdom = mistakes + timeWisdom = Seeing below the surface and beyond the obviousThat being wise means being present and awareHow cultivating wisdom is a practice and how humor cultivates wisdom.Courage is walking toward what you want to walk away fromHave the courage to Speak Up, Care, CommitHow sarcasm can be a mask of fearBringing the weirdHow it takes energy to withholdLove is wanting to do well for othersLove is expansive, inclusive, and connectiveThe things that get in the way of loveEric Kaufmann Links:sagatica.comFacebookInstagramYouTubeCalm app – Reduce your anxiety and stress and help you sleep better. Meditations for anxiety, adult bedtime stories, soothing music, calm masterclasses with many One You Feed Guests. Visit www.calm.com/wolf for 25% off a Calm Premium SubscriptionThe Great Courses Plus – learn more about virtually any topic – beyond the basics and even master a subject if you want to. Get 3 months of unlimited access to their entire library for just $30. www.thegreatcoursesplus.com/wolfSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Brent Williams suffered for a long time from depression and anxiety and during that time he kept a journal about his thoughts, feelings, and experiences. That journal has now been turned in to a beautiful graphic novel called, Out Of The Woods: A Journey Through Depression and Anxiety. In this episode, Brent and Eric use his story as a jumping-off point to discuss how depression can show up in your life and how you can realistically, practically, and effectively find your way out of it.Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Brent Williams and I Discuss…His book, Out Of The Woods: A Journey Through Depression and AnxietyHow subtle depression can be in your life – permeating everything All the things he went to as a diagnosis before he admitted it was depression he was suffering fromHis resistance to taking depression medicationHow he watched his father take medication for anxiety and how it changed himHis resistance to taking help from othersHis experience in therapyThe metaphor of depression medication being a life preserver but you still have to swim back to shoreThe components of self-care: eat well, exercise, be with people, be outside, get support, stop ruminating, proper sleepHow fundamental good nutrition is when it comes to mental well beingDoing small and manageable things when you’re depressedHow the reward mechanism in your brain isn’t working properly when you’re depressedHow it took him a while to find the right therapist The potential danger of meditating when depressedThat mindfulness meditation was the form of meditating that helped him mostThe impact of keeping a mood chart – seeing a pattern that you can’t see at the timeThat sometimes you just have to push yourself over the hurdle of doing things that are good for you when you don’t feel like doing themLooking at your activities to assess your mental wellbeingDepression showing up as irritability in menBrent Williams Links:outofthewoods.co.nz **Special Offer** for The One You Feed listeners! Buy 1 Book, Get 1 Free to give to a friend, family member or a community center!FacebookTwitterPhlur – Eric created his own sampler set that you can try! Get this curated sampler set or create your own. Get 20% off your first 3 Phlur samples at Phlur.com/wolfFabFitFun – A women’s lifestyle subscription box filled with full-size premium items that you will love. Eric’s girlfriend is honestly obsessed because the items in this box are just so good. Give yourself this gift – use the promo code FEED for $10 off your first box at fabfitfun.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dr. Sue Johnson is an author, clinical psychologist, researcher, and an internationally recognized leader in the field of couple interventions. She is founding Director of the International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT) and Distinguished Research Professor at Alliant University in San Diego, California, as well as Professor Emeritus, Clinical Psychology, at the University of Ottawa, Canada. In this interview, Dr. Sue Johnson discuss her best selling book, “Hold Me Tight: 7 Conversations for a Lifetime of Love” and her groundbreaking research of helping couples to enhance, repair, and keep their relationship.   Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Dr. Sue Johnson and I Discuss… Her book, Hold Me Tight: 7 Conversations for a Lifetime of Love The wolf parable and how therapists act as the third wolf for couples. Relationships are often stuck in fear and anger Emotional disconnection causes distress in relationships. Humans are wired for close connection with others. Attachment needs continue into adulthood, most notably in romantic relationships. Common conversations in distressed relationships are known as “demon dialogues”. Relationships stuck in predictable patterns is referred to as the “Protest Polka”. “Freeze and Flee” means one person gives up on the relationship.  “Find the Bad Guy” in other words, "It’s not me, it’s you”  Understanding the circle of criticism, or the “dance” you’re stuck in. Learning to blame this “dance” rather than each other.   The “hold me tight conversation” that creates safety in the relationship. Understanding the negative cycle that causes disconnection. Creating a positive cycle by creating a secure bond “ARE” – Accessibility, Responsiveness, and Engagement. Talking about fears rather than acting on them leads to bonding. Emotional connection in a relationship is a source of joy and strength. Dr. Sue Johnson Links: drsuejohnson.com Twitter Facebook TalkSpace – the online therapy company that lets you message a licensed therapist from anywhere at any time. Therapy on demand. Non-judgemental, practical help when you need it at a fraction of the cost of traditional therapy. Visit www.talkspace.com and enter Promo Code: WOLF to get 65% off your first month. DoorDash – Don’t worry about dinner, let dinner come to you with DoorDash. Get $5 off your first order of $15 or more when you download the DoorDash app and enter promo code WOLF Westin – their reason for being is to help you travel well – eat well, move well and sleep well. Welcome to wellness. Explore at Westin.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Gabe Howard is an award-winning writer, speaker, and host of the weekly Psych Central show who lives with bipolar and anxiety disorders. His new book, Mental Illness Is an A-Hole – And Other Observations, is what he and Eric discuss in this episode. You’ll be captivated by Gabe’s story as he tells it – it’s compelling, relatable, inspiring, and educational. Whether or not you have bipolar disorder or another mental illness, chances are you know someone or some people who do and so this is an important episode to listen to – you’ll deepen your understanding of what it means to live with mental illness. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year.But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you!In This Interview, Gabe Howard and I Discuss…His book, Mental Illness Is an A-Hole – And Other ObservationsWhat bipolar disorder is (and isn’t) and how it shows up in his lifeHis compelling storyThe myth that people with mental illness come from bad familiesWhen he went to the ER because of suicidal thoughtsHow he defines recovery: spending more time living life than managing his bipolar disorderThe 4 years he spent in a battle with his mental illnessHow you have to learn what works for you – and how that takes timeThe role of medication in the treatment of mental illnessHow it stings when your body lets you downEric’s experience taking and not taking medication for his depressionWhole health wellnessSuicideDon’t choose a permanent solution to a temporary problemHow suicide doesn’t end the pain – it transfers it to someone elseGabe Howard Links:gabehoward.comTwitterFacebookSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hi Everyone!Here is a mini episode that was made for our Patreon members called A Teaching, a Song, and a Poem (and sometimes a bad joke!)Teaching: We Can Always Grow and ChangePoem: The Trees- Philip LarkinSong: Tomorrow- James If you'd like to get one of these every week, you can become a member of our community by going to oneyoufeed.net/joinBy supporting and joining The One You Feed Community, you'll get access to:A Teaching, a Song, and a Poem mini episodesPost Show ConversationsAd Free Episodesand more!Your support is greatly appreciated!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.