Relationship Advice from a “Mega Monk” | Haemin Sunim

Nov 11, 2020

Haemin Sunim, a Korean Zen Buddhist monk and author of the bestselling 'Love for Imperfect Things,' shares his journey from academia to monastic life. He discusses the importance of self-love and mindfulness, revealing how perfectionism often exists in our minds. With insights into relationship dynamics, he offers advice on empathy and support, emphasizing the beauty of imperfection. Sunim also reflects on the transformative power of attention in love, showing how genuine connections thrive through mindfulness.

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INSIGHT

Self-Discovery and the Unknowable

Humans are born to discover who they are.
This self-discovery involves confronting the unknowable and letting go of labels.

INSIGHT

Detaching from Labels

Letting go of identification with temporary labels like nationality or race is key to spiritual growth.
This detachment paves the way for understanding our true nature.

ADVICE

Finding Space in Meditation

Recognize the space between thoughts during meditation.
Appreciate these moments of emptiness, as they offer a glimpse into non-duality.

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The Things You Can See Only When You Slow Down

How to Be Calm in a Busy World

Haemin Sunim

This book by Haemin Sunim provides timeless wisdom and practical advice on living a mindful and fulfilled life. It emphasizes the importance of slowing down and focusing on the present moment to manage stress and negative emotions. The book is divided into several chapters covering topics such as relationships, love, and spiritual practice, and includes calming illustrations to help readers reflect and slow down. Sunim's teachings highlight that our reality is shaped by our perspective and that practicing awareness and self-compassion can lead to genuine happiness and inner peace.

Love for Imperfect Things

Haemin Sunim

In this book, Haemin Sunim argues that true happiness and fulfillment come from accepting oneself and others with their flaws. He draws on personal anecdotes and years of helping others to introduce the art of self-care, emphasizing the importance of compassion, empathy, and forgiveness. The book is structured around various themes such as self-care, acceptance, and listening, and is enhanced by over thirty-five full-color illustrations by Lisk Feng. Sunim's approach helps readers connect with others on a deeper level, bounce back from failures, and find peace in a world striving for perfection.

Ash Wednesday

Ethan Hawke

In 'Ash Wednesday', Ethan Hawke crafts a narrative that explores themes of love, identity, and personal growth. The story revolves around Jimmy Heartsock, a troubled Army staff sergeant, and Christy, his pregnant girlfriend, as they embark on a transformative road trip. Through alternating perspectives, Hawke delves into the complexities of their relationship and the challenges they face in finding stability and happiness.

Song of Myself

Walt Whitman

In 'Song of Myself', Walt Whitman crafts a poetic masterpiece that celebrates the individual self while embracing the universal. The poem, part of his collection 'Leaves of Grass', is known for its free verse style and its exploration of themes such as identity, nature, and the human condition. It has been influential in American literature and continues to be studied for its innovative form and profound themes.