Worklife with Adam Grant The science of healthy relationships with John and Julie Gottman
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Dec 13, 2022 
John and Julie Gottman, renowned psychologists and co-founders of the Gottman Institute, share their expertise on creating and maintaining healthy relationships. They discuss avoiding the 'four horsemen of marital apocalypse,' navigating criticism, and the emotional toll of conflict. The couple explores practical tools like the Gottman Connect platform to improve communication. They also reflect on how the pandemic impacted relationships, amplifying strengths and challenges, while emphasizing the need for understanding and support in overcoming obstacles.
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Origin of Relationship Research
- John Gottman became interested in relationships because his own were failing.
- He and his friend, Robert Levinson, created a lab to study successful relationships.
Predicting Divorce
- The Gottmans can predict divorce with high accuracy by observing 15-minute interactions.
- This prediction is based on subtle signals exchanged between partners.
Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse
- The "Four Horsemen"—criticism, contempt, defensiveness, stonewalling—predict relationship failure.
- Contempt is the most destructive, impacting the listener's immune system.
