The Resetter Podcast with Dr. Mindy Women, Men & the "Gray Divorce": How to Reconnect When Everything Is Changing with Terry Real
11 snips
Dec 15, 2025 
Terry Real, a renowned couples therapist and bestselling author, dives deep into the rising trend of 'gray divorce' among midlife couples. He explores how cultural shifts and evolving expectations affect relationships, emphasizing that both men and women face unique challenges. Terry discusses the need for men to embrace vulnerability while women reclaim their voices and power. With practical advice on fostering intimacy and connection, he provides tools to navigate these changes, showing how couples can thrive amid life's transitions.
AI Snips
Chapters
Books
Transcript
Episode notes
Patriarchy Blocks Modern Intimacy
- Patriarchy trains men toward invulnerability and women toward pleasing, which blocks modern intimacy demands.
- Terry Real says intimacy requires undoing these learned roles to reconnect emotionally.
Start With Compassion When Asking Change
- Begin requests with acknowledgement and compassion when asking a man to be more vulnerable.
- Frame it as courageous and appreciated to reduce criticism-driven shame and defensiveness.
From Accommodation To Loving Power
- Women often move from accommodating to individual empowerment during midlife, which can break connection.
- Real calls for 'loving power' that pairs assertiveness with teamwork to preserve intimacy.
