Worklife with Adam Grant How to say no
461 snips
Apr 29, 2025 
In this engaging discussion, Vanessa Bonds, a Cornell Professor and author focusing on influence, teams up with Sherry Liu, founder of the Eldest Daughter Club and a recovering people pleaser. They dive deep into the psychology behind saying no, highlighting the emotional toll of people-pleasing and the cultural pressures faced by women. The duo shares effective strategies for setting boundaries, emphasizing that asserting oneself can lead to healthier relationships and personal well-being.
AI Snips
Chapters
Books
Transcript
Episode notes
Adam Grant's People-Pleasing Story
- Adam Grant shares his personal experience as a chronic people pleaser who said yes too much out of fear of losing approval.
- He realized this behavior was due to caring about others' opinions, not their needs.
Why Saying No Feels Risky
- We say yes so often because rejecting a request risks appearing uncooperative and damaging our reputation.
- This pressure is paradoxically higher with acquaintances, as the relationship is uncertain but still significant.
Sherry Liu's Journey to Saying No
- Sherry Liu shares her background as an eldest daughter of an immigrant family navigating people-pleasing pressures.
- She learned to say no at work with her manager's support to focus on impactful projects and avoid secretarial tasks.
