How to Be Okay When Life Feels Overwhelming with Liz Fosslien
Mar 7, 2025
auto_awesome
Liz Fosslien, an expert on emotions and author of "Big Feelings," explores how to navigate life’s emotional overwhelm. She debunks myths about negative emotions, emphasizing their value in personal growth. Liz discusses perfectionism as a barrier to authenticity and shares practical strategies like time chunking to handle anxiety. She highlights the importance of self-acceptance over striving for unattainable ideals, encouraging a healthier perspective on uncertainty. Tune in for insights on transforming big feelings into opportunities for growth!
Acknowledging and processing negative emotions like anger and envy can empower individuals to constructively address their feelings rather than suppress them.
Accepting that uncertainty is an inherent part of life helps individuals feel more grounded and reduces the anxiety associated with unpredictable outcomes.
Recognizing perfectionism as a barrier to progress allows individuals to set achievable goals and fosters healthier self-perceptions by embracing growth over fear of failure.
Deep dives
Understanding Emotions and Thoughts
Many people experience thoughts that lead to negative emotions, such as the desire to escape difficult feelings or situations. While thoughts are influential, they may not always guide individuals to effective solutions for deeper emotional issues. Emotions often stem from underlying factors that require acknowledgment and processing rather than avoidance. Therefore, understanding that emotions are normal and acknowledging them can be a vital part of emotional health.
Debunking Myths About Emotions
Common misconceptions about emotions can cause individuals to feel isolated or ashamed of their feelings. Examples include the belief that anger or envy are entirely negative emotions, which can lead to discouragement. However, these emotions can provide valuable insight into personal values and motivations. Acknowledging that everyone experiences such emotions can empower individuals to address them constructively rather than suppressing them.
Navigating Uncertainty
Uncertainty is an unavoidable aspect of life that can generate anxiety, yet it is crucial to understand that certainty is often a myth. Accepting that life inherently involves unpredictable outcomes can help individuals feel more grounded during challenging times. The anxiety associated with uncertainty does not necessarily equate to real threats, and recognizing this can alleviate distress. When confronted with anxiety, rather than rushing into action, it's beneficial to pause and examine specific fears to gain clarity.
The Impact of Perfectionism
Perfectionism often leads individuals to pursue unattainable standards, resulting in disappointment and frustration. A prevalent myth is the misconception that striving for perfection equates to success, while in reality, it can hinder progress. Recognizing tendencies toward perfectionism is crucial, as it allows individuals to set more realistic and achievable goals. By shifting focus from avoiding failure to embracing growth, individuals can foster healthier self-perceptions and improve emotional well-being.
The Role of Comparison
Comparing oneself to others, especially in the era of social media, can lead to feelings of inadequacy and envy. While it's natural to make comparisons, it's important to encompass a broader perspective that includes evaluating personal achievements alongside peers. Instead of solely focusing on perceived shortcomings, reflecting on what one values can be a constructive approach. This process can transform feelings of envy into valuable insights that contribute to personal growth and self-acceptance.
In this episode, Liz Fosslien discusses how to be okay when life feels overwhelming. Do you ever feel overwhelmed by emotions like anger, envy, or uncertainty—and then feel guilty for feeling that way? Liz challenges some of the biggest myths about emotions. She also dives into why negative emotions aren’t actually bad, how perfectionism holds us back, and why uncertainty feels so unbearable. She shares research-backed insights and actionable strategies to help us navigate difficult feelings in a more constructive and self-compassionate way.
Key Takeaways:
00:00 – Introduction to Big Feelings and Emotional Myths
05:55 – The Illusion of Certainty and Why We Overestimate Risk
14:37 – The Cycle of Anxiety, Thought Filtering, and Anxious Fixing
22:53 – Perfectionism as Fear of Failure and How to Break the Pattern
32:35 – The Power of Language: How “Always” and “Never” Reinforce Negative Thinking
38:39 – Comparison Isn’t the Problem—How to Use It for Growth
48:54 – Time Chunking: A Survival Strategy for Emotional Overwhelm
54:49 – Closing Thoughts: Accepting Big Feelings as Part of the Human Experience