Conversations from the Heart

Why does saying no make your heart race?Why can honesty feel like risk?This episode explores what happens when boundaries stir up the old fear of losing love. Paul learns how a simple process check can bring kindness to endings, while Jereme discovers how early lessons about punishment and approval still shape her adult relationships.If self-advocacy makes you anxious, this conversation will help you find truth and tenderness in the same breath.For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page

In this week's conversation, Vanessa brings forward the pain of a friendship that feels increasingly one-sided. Together, we explore the difference between situational limits and structural limits in relationships, how to trust the “data” we receive when others shut down, and the grief that comes with realizing we may be doing too much emotional labor.We explore how to discern when to keep engaging, when to step back, and how to communicate desires for mutuality without blame. We also look at why some people can talk the talk of empathy yet still struggle to walk it in relationships. And, how to honor our own boundaries when reciprocity is missing.Listener Takeaways•Learn how to interpret someone’s emotional shutdowns as information about capacity rather than a reflection on your delivery.•Recognize the signs of over-functioning in friendships and how to stop carrying all the emotional labor.•Practice asking direct but compassionate questions that clarify whether mutuality is truly present.•Understand the developmental stages of NVC practice and why some people can use the tools for their own needs but not yet offer reciprocity.•Embrace grief as a necessary step when relationships aren’t mutual, while keeping your heart open to future possibilities. For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page

When Nancy learned that her niece had removed a single sentence from a family speech, one that acknowledged Nancy’s marriage and presence, it triggered a wave of old pain. What may seem like a small omission unearthed decades of erasure, advocacy, and exhaustion.In this deeply moving conversation, we explore how one personal moment of being edited out becomes a microcosm of much larger cultural shifts. As stories of marginalized people are quietly removed from government websites, training programs, and public institutions, Nancy’s family moment reflects a collective trend: what gets remembered, and what gets deleted, is never neutral.Together, we navigate the emotional toll of invisibility, the weight of lifelong advocacy, and the tender discernment it takes to speak up with care. Whether you’ve been left out of the story, or left someone else out, this episode offers a powerful invitation to return ourselves, and each other, to the circle. Listener Takeaways:•Erasure may not be loud,but it’s deeply impactful. Small omissions can reactivate deep emotional wounds, especially for those historically marginalized.•Silence isn’t neutral. Bystanders and witnesses have power, too. A lack of acknowledgment can deepen the harm.•Discernment is key. Speaking up doesn’t always mean confronting the whole crowd. Often, one honest conversation is what opens the door to healing.•Advocacy fatigue is real. Especially for elders who’ve carried this work for decades. There’s wisdom in knowing how to keep showing up in ways that preserve your energy and dignity.•Returning non-love with love is an act of sovereignty. It’s not about people-pleasing: it’s about transforming disconnection into care without abandoning yourself. For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page

Explore the challenges of handling corrections that feel critical, especially from leaders. Learn practical tools like the 'It sounds like... is that true?' method to reclaim your voice in tough conversations. Navigate the emotional landscape of vulnerability and shame while aiming to respond thoughtfully rather than reactively. Discover how to initiate repair conversations with compassion and request kinder feedback. Dive into the dynamics of group interactions and how to maintain your dignity when faced with subtle power moves.

What do we do when the person who raised us is now emotionally volatile, resistant to help, and unintentionally casting us as the villain when we try to care for them?In this heartfelt conversation, Diana brings forward the tender, painful challenge of loving her aging mother, who struggles with emotional regulation, trauma, and shame, and the deep inner conflict between wanting to offer support and needing to protect her own nervous system.Together, we unpack:•The emotional cost of parentification and role reversal•How to stop being your parent’s regulator, therapist, or emotional manager•What boundaries look like when withdrawal isn’t abandonment•The grief and guilt that emerge when we start living our own lives•Why “staying kind” sometimes means stepping awayIf you’ve ever struggled with guilt around setting boundaries, or felt trapped between compassion and exhaustion in your family, this one’s for you. For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page

Navigating friendships can be tricky when playful banter shifts to moralizing. This discussion explores how covert control can affect communication. Listeners learn the significance of wanting to matter beneath the surface of seemingly simple desires, like wanting chocolate. Practical scripts are offered to help reclaim voice and address uncomfortable dynamics without blame. The art of empathetic communication and vulnerability is emphasized, encouraging sharing personal experiences as a means of connection while maintaining trust.

What do you do when every conversation with a parent leaves you feeling erased, criticized, or shut down, but walking away feels like betrayal?In this raw and tender coaching session, we meet Suzanne, who’s struggling to navigate contact with her mother: a woman who routinely gaslights her, shuts down difficult topics, and prioritizes her own emotional comfort over honest connection. Suzanne wants to be seen. She also wants to stay safe. And in her family, those two things feel mutually exclusive.We explore:•The heartbreak of being unseen by a parent you still long to connect with.•The nervous system impact of childhood emotional silencing, and why it still flares in adulthood.•How to say “I don’t feel safe talking right now” without guilt.•What to do when someone turns your feelings into personal attacks.•And how to develop scripts that mirror instead of merge, so you can stay true to yourself in hard conversations.If you’ve ever felt trapped in a role that doesn’t fit, or stuck in a pattern that leaves you numb, enraged, or ashamed, this one’s for you. For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page

In this intimate coaching conversation, Colleen brings a familiar dilemma: her husband drives too fast for her nervous system to handle. She doesn’t want to control him, but she does want to feel safe. Together, we unpack how to name her limits without moralizing, how to invite collaboration instead of compliance, and how to speak from care rather than critique.Key Takeaways for Listeners:•Boundaries are not about controlling others.  They’re about naming what you are or are not available for.•To foster buy-in, shift from You’re wrong to This doesn’t work for my nervous system.•Compassionate communication can include honest judgments, especially when they arise from fear and care.•Sharing your vulnerabilities can diffuse tension and build understanding faster than logic or critique.•Collaborative planning (in calm moments) is often more effective than reactive correction (in hot moments). For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page

In this heartfelt and courageous coaching conversation, Prerana brings forward a question so many of us have quietly carried: How much need is too much in a relationship? And what do we do when our emotional needs are met with kind words but little follow-through?Together, we unpack the gap between good intentions and sustainable intimacy, the heartbreak of feeling like a “complainer” just for wanting closeness, and the painful confusion of loving someone who’s not meeting us where we long to be met.Key questions explored:•How do I communicate needs without overwhelming my partner?•Can someone really change, or are they just trying to appease me?•What do I do when I feel more like a best friend or roommate than a romantic partner?•How do I discern whether to stay or go when there’s no malice, just misalignment? For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page

In this heartfelt coaching call, Nina wrestles with two layered questions:1.How can I have an honest, meaningful conversation with the boy my daughter is dating, without overwhelming or intimidating him?2.How do I stay emotionally attuned and supportive to my older daughter who might feel left behind when her younger sister gets engaged first?Together, we explore what it means to assess someone’s emotional maturity: not by lecturing or preaching, but by creating relational moments that reveal their capacity for humility, self-awareness, and connection. Nina learns to shift from “explaining what matters” to “asking questions that reveal,” including storytelling prompts that elicit vulnerability, repair orientation, and conflict navigation style.Then we transition to her fear about her older daughter’s emotional reaction to the younger sibling’s engagement. We unpack the cultural and personal sensitivities involved, and I offer a powerful shift: lead with presence, not performance. Ask before reassuring. Witness before reframing. Allow emotional truth to be spoken without trying to fix it.Listener Takeaways•How to assess emotional maturity in someone without coming off as judgmental or overbearing•Conversation starters that reveal someone’s approach to conflict, power struggles, and personal growth•The difference between performing connection and living it•How to support adult children through complex sibling dynamics•Why “fixing” someone’s feelings can feel like disapproval, and what to do instead For ongoing practice and deeper learning, join my monthly membership program. You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans. Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com. Here are more ways to connect with me: Join the School of Human Connection Hop on one of our live calls Check out my YouTube page