The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}

***This episode originally aired on February 2nd, 2021***Lying is probably the behavior parents seek support with the most.  It's confusing.  It's triggering.  It's exhausting. Did you catch last week's episode on X Ray Vision Goggles?  We can use those goggles to get underneath the lying so we can respond in ways that actually sets the boundary and increases the possibility of helping our children developing more socially and relationally appropriate behaviors. Free Infographic:https://RobynGobbel.com/lyinginfographicRead the full transcript at: https://robyngobbel.com/lying/Follow Me On:FacebookInstagramOver on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: Being WithMaking Sense of Baffling Behaviors: A FREE audio-only training for professionals who work with the families of kids with big, baffling behaviors!Yes! FREE! You'll listen on your own time, right in your podcast app.RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBehaviors for all the details and to sign up!It starts May 5 and will be available to listen to until May 12. But don't wait to sign up! Check Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources :::Buy Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBookJoin The Club (or get on the waiting list!) over at RobynGobbel.com/TheClubHop on the waiting list for Being With- an immersive professional training program exploring the neurobiology of big, baffling behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BeingWith

Living with someone who is chronically dysregulated can be exhausting and isolating. The discussion focuses on how our nervous systems influence each other, highlighting the importance of connection. It explores the disruptions in relationship rhythms and the concept of co-regulation. Listeners gain insights into fostering a sense of safety while navigating emotional turmoil. Through shared experiences, the conversation offers validation and support for those feeling overwhelmed by the challenges of such dynamics.

Discover essential strategies for helping children who struggle with chronic dysregulation. Learn how food, hydration, and movement play a crucial role in emotional stability. Explore the significance of structure and predictability in routines to create a sense of safety. Finally, understand the importance of maintaining close connections to foster support and empathy. These practical tips aim to empower parents navigating these challenging emotional landscapes.

Explore the curious dynamics of children's behavior, revealing why they often shine in public but struggle at home. Dive into the impact of attachment trauma and the neurobiology of emotional regulation. Discover how family connections can trigger moments of dysregulation and learn that fluctuations in behavior are a normal part of family life. Understand the significance of safe environments and the importance of support for both parents and children in navigating these challenges.

***This episode originally aired on May 11th, 2021***You’ve asked yourself “Is this a behavior that’s coming from my child’s trauma?  Or is this regular acting out kid behavior???”Sometimes it’s pretty obvious but if you’re asking yourself that question, you’re probably in a situation where it isn’t obvious.What if I told you it doesn’t matter?Hear me out.Why do you want to figure that out?  Usually because it feels like you’ll handle the situation different based on the answer.But actually, it doesn’t matter. And it’s impossible to determine anyway.What you really want to think about is- how dysregulated is my child?And then respond to that!!  There are some core truths about humans- regulated, connected kids who feel safe do well.  So if you’re child isn’t doing well- ask yourself if this is about regulation, connection, felt-safety or some combination of those.Then, based on your child’s level of arousal/dysregulation, you can intervene in a way that will calm their arousal and bring back their owl brain.   To view the full summary or the full transcript visit: https://robyngobbel.com/traumabehavior/Over on my website you can find:Masterclass and eBook on What Behavior Really Is (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: Being WithMaking Sense of Baffling Behaviors: A FREE audio-only training for professionals who work with the families of kids with big, baffling behaviors!Yes! FREE! You'll listen on your own time, right in your podcast app.RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBehaviors for all the details and to sign up!It starts May 5 and will be available to listen to until May 12. But don't wait to sign up! Check Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources :::Buy Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBookJoin The Club (or get on the waiting list!) over at RobynGobbel.com/TheClubHop on the waiting list for Being With- an immersive professional training program exploring the neurobiology of big, baffling behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BeingWith

Parenting with co-regulating and seeing below our kids behaviors is actually a privilege we rarely talk about. It’s always a privilege, but especially when we consider different marginalized and oppressed identities that a lot of kids- and those of you listening- intersectionally hold. In this episode, you’ll learnThe definition of privilege (it is NOT a criticism)The privilege of safety for folks with histories of traumaThe privilege of safety for folks with other marginalized and oppressed identitiesHow this relates to parenting Resources mentioned in this podcast:Mr. Chazz https://www.mrchazz.com/https://www.instagram.com/mrchazz/Yolanda Williams & Parenting Decolonizedhttps://www.instagram.com/prntgdcolonized/What Happened to You? By Bruce Perry & Oprah WinfreyRead the full transcript at:RobynGobbel.com/privilegeFollow Me On:FacebookInstagramOver on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: Being WithMaking Sense of Baffling Behaviors: A FREE audio-only training for professionals who work with the families of kids with big, baffling behaviors!Yes! FREE! You'll listen on your own time, right in your podcast app.RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBehaviors for all the details and to sign up!It starts May 5 and will be available to listen to until May 12. But don't wait to sign up! Check Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources :::Buy Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBookJoin The Club (or get on the waiting list!) over at RobynGobbel.com/TheClubHop on the waiting list for Being With- an immersive professional training program exploring the neurobiology of big, baffling behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BeingWith

Parents of kids with a history of relational and complex trauma are some of the loneliness people I’ve ever known.The loneliness of parenting becomes compounded when the loneliness isn’t seen.The loneliness is traumatic.  It leaves an imprint on our spirits that wreaks havoc on our health (physical and mental) and our relationships (with others, and with ourself).Undoing aloneness is one of the most important ways professionals and helpers can support parents of children impacted by trauma.Parents- it's important to find spaces where you can be fully welcomed, seen, and known.  Friends, partners, therapists, support groups- face to face connections are life-changing of course, but the pandemic has taught us that even virtual connection changes the brain.Undoing Aloneness is one of the primary reasons I created The Club- a virtual community of connection, co-regulation, and a little education for parents of kids impacted by trauma, and the professionals who adore them.  CLICK HERE to read about The Club and join the waitlist for the next time we welcome new membersOver on my website, you can also read and share a blog about Undoing Aloneness.Follow Me On:FacebookInstagramOver on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)LOTS & LOTS of FREE ResourcesOngoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: Being WithMaking Sense of Baffling Behaviors: A FREE audio-only training for professionals who work with the families of kids with big, baffling behaviors!Yes! FREE! You'll listen on your own time, right in your podcast app.RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBehaviors for all the details and to sign up!It starts May 5 and will be available to listen to until May 12. But don't wait to sign up! :::Buy Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBookJoin The Club (or get on the waiting list!) over at RobynGobbel.com/TheClubHop on the waiting list for Being With- an immersive professional training program exploring the neurobiology of big, baffling behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BeingWith

Exploring the depths of children's big emotions, the discussion reveals how vulnerable nervous systems lead to hurtful expressions like "I hate you!". Delve into strategies for staying calm and responsive amidst verbal aggression. Learn to differentiate between words and underlying feelings, fostering open communication. Insights encourage listening deeply and addressing the root of emotional turmoil, ensuring parents navigate these challenging moments with empathy and connection.

Robyn explores the grief in parenting kids with vulnerable nervous systems In this episode, you’ll learn:The relationship between trauma and griefWhy it's important to make space for grief in our kids and in ourselvesThe role of self-compassionHow a lack of media representation of your parenting journey causes griefResources mentioned in this podcast:Robyn's book: https://robyngobbel.com/bafflingbookRead a summary or the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/griefOver on my website you can find:Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The ClubYear Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: Being WithMaking Sense of Baffling Behaviors: A FREE audio-only training for professionals who work with the families of kids with big, baffling behaviors!Yes! FREE! You'll listen on your own time, right in your podcast app.RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBehaviors for all the details and to sign up!It starts May 5 and will be available to listen to until May 12. But don't wait to sign up! Check Out All Robyn's Free Resources!You can download all sorts of free resources, including webinars, eBook, and infographics about topics such as lying, boundaries, and co-regulation!RobynGobbel.com/FreeResources :::Buy Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBookJoin The Club (or get on the waiting list!) over at RobynGobbel.com/TheClubHop on the waiting list for Being With- an immersive professional training program exploring the neurobiology of big, baffling behaviors at RobynGobbel.com/BeingWith

Silly behavior in children can often be a sign of emotional dysregulation, confusing many parents. This discussion reveals how to distinguish between genuine fun and signs of distress. Techniques for fostering regulation through playful interactions are shared, emphasizing the power of rhythmic activities. Plus, discover supportive resources that can help parents navigate these moments while promoting connection and safety for their children. It's an enlightening look at the dynamics of childhood behavior!