Among the least pleasant experiences in life is feeling stuck. That stuck feeling comes in multiple forms and we've all felt themes and variations of it. Even Dr. Seuss wrote about it in his book that is often given as a graduation gift, Oh the Places You'll Go. If you've read it, you might remember the part about being in the stuck place he called the “in between place” which he also describes as excruciating. So, even Dr. Seuss agrees: being stuck sucks. And I can only hope he would have said, “Being stuck sucks. It sucks in a house with a mouse, and it sucks on a boat with a goat.” And if we were able to step outside the overwhelming experience of feeling stuck, we might ask these questions: What does being stuck actually mean? What are some common pitfalls that lead us to being stuck? And, of course, what are some good ways out of being stuck? Fortunately, I know just the person to ask! Britt Frank, LCSW, is a psychotherapist in private practice and the author of a highly readable and wisdom-packed book called The Science of Stuck. I absolutely loved this book and I am not alone. Former SuperPsyched guest, Dr. Richard Schwartz, who is the creator of one of the most important systems of psychotherapy, called Internal Family Systems, said, “In this lively, well-written book, Britt Frank adds her compelling voice to this movement toward listening to rather than avoiding or fighting with what is making you stuck.” I so enjoyed being with Britt and I’m confident you will love learning from her. So, listen in as Britt and I talk about the science of stuck. Book Link: https://amzn.to/42JuF8k This is an affiliate link. It will provide me with a small commission on purchases made through it and help the podcast (but it won’t affect the price you pay).

In my last episode, I explored the topic of how minds change. In this episode, we take that theme from the abstract and academic to the real and extreme. Recently I learned about a modern hero. When I first heard about him, my jaw dropped. The story of this man was one of the greatest things I had ever heard and I'm so grateful that he agreed to meet. Daryl Davis (https://www.daryldavis.com/) is an African American piano player who has played with the best of the best—we’re talking BB King, Chuck Berry, Jerry Lee Lewis, and other household names. He’s an author, an actor who you may have seen on HBO’s The Wire, and a martial artist. But most incredible, he is a man who has singlehandedly befriended men in the KKK and other white supremacy groups and, over time, assisted them in thinking through their decisions. As a result, he has helped over 200 men out of that life. He has been written about extensively and he’s given a well-watched TED talk and there’s even a great documentary about him called Accidental Courtesy that you can purchase on Amazon Video. You will love learning from this extraordinary man. So, listen in on how a black musician skillfully helped 200 men get out of the Klan. TED Talk Link: https://tinyurl.com/3t9dxazd

We humans like to be right about things. As you’ll hear in this episode, our self-image and our perception of being trustworthy to others can feel threatened when our thinking is questioned. After all, within our own brains, our thought processes make perfect sense—at least to us—so how could we be wrong? And, outside of our own brains, we’ve all had the painful experience of failing to sway someone’s opinion even when the facts and data are clearly on our side. Why are minds so difficult to change? What are the cognitive biases that may get in the way of us thinking something through? And how can we override these tendencies to make better decisions and live fuller lives? Fortunately, I know just the guy to ask! David McRaney (https://www.davidmcraney.com/) a journalist, a self-described psychology nerd, and a self-delusion expert. He has written many books describing how our brains work (and how they don’t) including his bestselling book with a super cheeky title “You Are Not So Smart.” His most recent book, “How Minds Change” is a very important contribution to psychology and I am not alone in my high-regard for David. Publisher’s Weekly writes, “McRaney makes a convincing case . . . and backs it up with what science has to say about ‘replac[ing] old ignorance with new wisdom.’” So, listen in has David and I talk about how minds change. Book Link: https://amzn.to/3Ns7NWt

A struggle for any parent is seeing their child in pain. Even when the pain is small, we have an impulse to fix that pain. And when the child’s pain is extreme, that impulse can skyrocket. Yet, as any parent can attest, there’s only so much help can provide which can leave us feeling helpless. How can we be most helpful even when we can’t fix things? How can we differentiate between adverse experiences that will be short-term versus ones that may linger and cause harm long-term? Fortunately, I know just the woman to ask these and many other questions to help our children through adverse situations! Dr. Melissa Goldberg Mintz is a clinical psychologist with expertise in treating children who have experienced trauma. She’s also the author of an important book called Has Your Child Been Traumatized?: How to Know and What to Do to Promote Healing and Recovery. So, listen in as Melissa and I talk about how to help your children through adversity and trauma. Book Link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1462547494/ref=cm_sw_r_as_gl_api_gl_i_D90S99N42YSERR87NC1S?linkCode=ml2&tag=superpsyche0b-20 This is an affiliate link. It will provide me with a small commission on purchases made through it and help the podcast (but it won’t affect the price you pay). National Child Traumatic Stress Network: https://www.nctsn.org/

We all know the cliché that laughter is the best medicine. In addition to laughter, research suggests that levity and empathy are also great medicines. One of the best testing grounds I can imagine for considering the value of levity and empathy would have to be the pediatric oncology department. For the children and for the parents, the challenges faced there can be simply overwhelming. What's it like to work in the pediatric oncology department? What skills are most useful in helping the children and parents who are facing some of the heaviest burdens imaginable? And how might bringing empathy and levity be a part of serving those patients and parents as they deal with these burdens? As it happens, I know just the guy to ask! Marc Bader is a registered nurse who works in a pediatric oncology department in Silicon Valley. As you will hear, Marc is the embodiment of kindness, compassion, the desire to help, and one of the finest transmitters of levity I have ever known. He will share with you his method for helping people in their darkest hours. And, I expect you will glean from Marc various ways you can rock these skills in your personal and professional lives when you want to assist people who are in difficult places. So, listen in as Marc and I talk about bringing levity and empathy to serious situations.

When I was a child, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder was a term that was hardly known by laypeople. Over the past few decades, the condition also known as ADHD, has garnered so much notice that it now appears to be a household term. And yet, much remains misunderstood about ADHD… including the topic of this episode: how it relates to girls. Indeed, many girls and women have this condition but are overlooked and untreated. What are challenges that are unique to girls with ADHD? How does it present differently in girls from how it presents in boys? And, most importantly, what can be done to assist girls who are contending with ADHD in their lives so they can live more fully? Fortunately, I know just the guy to ask: Dr. Stephen Hinshaw (https://www.stephenhinshaw.com/) is a world-renowned clinician, a distinguished professor, and a major researcher on ADHD. He teaches at UC Berkeley and UCSF medical school and has written many books including his most recent, Straight Talk about ADHD in Girls: How to Help Your Daughter Thrive. This is a book that has been described as a “must read,” from members the scientific community as well as from parents who are trying to help their children with this condition. So, listen in as Steven and I talk about ADHD in girls and how to assist them in thriving. Book Link: https://amzn.to/42FHXlY This is an affiliate link. It will provide me with a small commission on purchases made through it and help the podcast (but it won’t affect the price you pay).

As a Silicon Valley-based psychologist, I frequently hear from my clients about their work woes. These woes are often the result of companies who erroneously subscribe to harsh techniques in trying to bring out the best in their employees, which is in line with the old cliché “The beatings will continue until morale is increased.” Not surprisingly, that doesn't work. Harsh practices may yield short-term benefits. Yet, creating positive workspaces appears to improve virtually all measures of long-term results. And while some people may lionize harsh practices or consider positive practices to be fuzzy, the science doesn't lie; implementing positive work practices is good business. Thankfully, many companies are noting this to the benefit of all stakeholders, including at least two major high-tech companies where I’ve served as a resiliency consultant. And that is why I am so excited to share with you my interview with this wonderful guest. Dr. Emma Seppälä is a professor at Yale School of Management. She also serves as the Science Director at Stanford University’s Center for Compassion and Altruism Research Education and is the author of a book I absolutely adored called The Happiness Track. I am not alone in my appreciation of Emma and her work. I wholly agree with Susan Cain, the author of Quiet, who said Emma’s work, “not only teaches us how to thrive in our chosen profession, but how to stay true to ourselves.” So, listen in as Emma and I geek out to the research about what really makes us thrive at work. Link to her book, The Happiness Track can be found here: https://amzn.to/3P6XGHC Link to her Harvard Business Review article, Proof That Positive Work Cultures Are More Productive can be found here: https://tinyurl.com/rusrt6u8 This is an affiliate link. It will provide me with a small commission on purchases made through it and help the podcast (but it won’t affect the price you pay).

Anyone familiar with my work knows I care a lot about friendship and relationships. As it turns out, one of the biggest predictors of our health is the quality of our relationships and our sense of community. Sadly, for many of us, our sense of community is on the low end these days. Historically, we tended to grow up in a community, years later, settle down in that community, and then had generations of our offspring in that same community. These days, many of us are living far away from where we grew up, and it’s not uncommon to have moved several times in between. All of that movement paired with the busyness of modern life can place a strain on relationships and community. Since community is so important to our happiness and overall health, how can we create it? Fortunately, I know just the guy to ask! Jon Levy (https://www.jonlevytlb.com/) is a behavioral scientist specializing in human connection, trust, and influence. He is the author of the New York Times Best Seller You’re Invited: The Art & Science of Connection, Trust and Belonging. It is a book I enjoyed so much, I listened to it twice. He’s also the founder of Influencers, the secret dining experience and private community of over 2,500 industry leaders including Nobel laureates, Olympians, celebrities, executives, royalty, and more. As you will hear, I loved geeking out with Jon about community, why it’s important, and how to create it. We also hit on various scientific studies that impact how we live, and life hacks to increase the likelihood of living better. So, listen in as Jon and I talk about creating communities to improve the quality and possibly the length of our lives. Book link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/0063030977/ref=cm_sw_r_as_gl_api_gl_i_5YMFWKZS2NJZQBAXPXW7?linkCode=ml2&tag=superpsyche0b-20 This is an affiliate link. It will provide me with a small commission on purchases made through it and help the podcast (but it won’t affect the price you pay).

Baseball legend Yogi Berra had some of the all-time best quotes. Although he has been gone for nearly a decade, Yogi-isms are plentiful and are still thrown around for their hilarity and brilliance. One of his quotes relates perfectly to this episode: “You can observe a lot just by watching.” Bartenders tend to observe a broad range of human experiences. They see people living fast, loud, full of celebrations, fights, and all kinds of regrettable decisions. They also see a side of our human experience featuring heartache, people questioning life’s meaning, and experiencing many shades of depression. And that’s why I have wanted to interview a bartender to get a unique weigh-in on psychology. My opportunity presented itself when I was on a hiking trail in Colorado and bumped into Zeke. Zeke is a 19-year veteran bartender and his lighthearted, friendly, and philosophical vibe felt perfect for an episode that I’m confident you’ll love. So, listen in as Zeke and I have a lively talk about bartender wisdom.

If I asked you what leads to success, what would you say? I imagine most of us think about schooling, work experience, and the quality of our social networks. But there are other things that really matter here. Research reveals a huge predictor of success is empathy, and that is the subject of this episode. As you will hear, empathy has an abundance of positive outcomes that improve our work lives, personal lives, and our overall health. Yet, sadly, there is an ongoing empathy crisis today and research is showing that the skill of empathy is dwindling in the face of social media and the overwhelming abundance of information today. Thankfully, help is here! Dr. Michelle Borba (https://micheleborba.com/) has been described by CNN as “[The] go-to parent expert,” and by the Today Show as “The Mommy Whisperer.” She’s the author of several books including, UnSelfie: Why Empathetic Kids Succeed in Our All-About-Me World. I loved her book as have numerous luminaries, thought leaders, and book reviewers at the highest levels. I am so grateful that you will have the pleasure of learning about empathy with Michele as she outlines why empathy matters and how to cultivate this game changing skill. Book Link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1501110071/ref=cm_sw_r_as_gl_api_gl_i_H4NEBPETY29PRGZGGJVH?linkCode=ml2&tag=superpsyche0b-20 This is an affiliate link. It will provide me with a small commission on purchases made through it and help the podcast (but it won’t affect the price you pay).