
How To!
You’ve got questions. Together, we get answers.We all need advice, but sometimes it’s hard to know where to turn. Each week, Courtney Martin and Carvell Wallace bring a listener on to the show to solve their toughest problems with the help of world-class experts. It’s free therapy, and you’re invited.
Latest episodes

Apr 22, 2025 • 45min
Living at Odds | 3. Making Amends for Ancestors
Kellie Farrish, a genealogist specializing in the histories of enslaved ancestors, and Kate Baron-Alicante, a financial activist with a focus on social change, join the discussion. They delve into the emotional turmoil of reconciling modern identities with painful ancestral legacies. Kellie reveals how reparative genealogy can unlock hidden family stories, while Kate reflects on her family's ties to slavery. Together, they explore the significance of forgiveness and communal healing in addressing America's complex history.

Apr 15, 2025 • 45min
Living at Odds | 2. An Education in Opposition
Stacey Woolley, former PTA president and Tulsa School Board member, shares her journey from opposition to collaboration with Deborah Gist, Superintendent of Tulsa Public Schools. They discuss their rocky start and how the challenges of COVID-19 transformed their relationship. Insights into the ideological tensions in education reveal the importance of communication and understanding. Together, they illustrate how perseverance and empathy can lead to effective collaboration, even in a politically charged environment.

Apr 8, 2025 • 46min
Living at Odds | 1. Two Partisans, One Corner
Two street vendors with opposing political views share a corner during the charged 2024 election. Selling everything from MAGA hats to Kamala candy, their rivalry transforms into an unexpected friendship. They navigate the complexities of their beliefs, showcasing the power of communication and mutual respect. As Election Day approaches, they reflect on the emotional fallout and societal issues, emphasizing the importance of dialogue amidst division. Their story highlights unity and the potential for collaboration in a polarized world.

Apr 1, 2025 • 42min
How To Replace Your Tesla
Patrick George, editor-in-chief of InsideEVs, shares his insights on the shifting tides in the Tesla ownership landscape. He discusses how Elon Musk's controversial actions are driving owners to sell their Model Ys, impacting resale values. Two soon-to-be-former Tesla owners reveal their emotional struggles with brand loyalty and personal values. The conversation delves into practical tips for selling electric vehicles and highlights new options like the Hyundai Ioniq 5. Listeners gain valuable advice on navigating the used EV market and understanding current trends.

11 snips
Mar 25, 2025 • 49min
How To Write Your Memoir
Melissa Febos, a bestselling author and professor, dives into the intricacies of memoir writing. She discusses how confronting fears and vulnerabilities can lead to healing and self-discovery. Listeners learn about the delicate balance between sharing personal truths and respecting privacy. Febos emphasizes storytelling as a liberating act, especially for women and marginalized voices. She also explores the journey of finding purpose in creative writing while navigating the ethical dilemmas of depicting personal relationships.

13 snips
Mar 18, 2025 • 51min
How To Discover Music You’ll Love
Join Derrick Gee, an online tastemaker and podcast host, as he dives into the flaws of streaming algorithms and the joys of music discovery. He reminisces about personal influences and how discovering music has evolved over time. By sharing tips on exploring underground genres and engaging with diverse sounds, Derrick encourages listeners to break free from algorithm-driven choices. Discover hidden gems and reconnect with the emotional aspects of music that make it truly special.

17 snips
Mar 12, 2025 • 31min
Supercommunicators | 3. How to Have the Hardest Conversations
In a riveting discussion, Vernā Myers, Netflix’s former vice president for inclusion strategy, shares her experiences navigating tough conversations at the company, particularly following a racially charged incident. She highlights the vital role of establishing ground rules and emotional connections to foster safer dialogues. Joined by psychologist Jay Van Bavel, they delve into strategies for tackling the hardest chats, encouraging listeners to confront their anxieties and transform personal narratives into bridges for understanding.

Mar 11, 2025 • 48min
How To Lose Your ‘Virginity’ at 43
Nicole Hardy, author of "Confessions of a Latter-day Virgin," shares her insights on embracing sexuality later in life after leaving the Mormon Church. She explores Elizabeth's journey as a 43-year-old seeking intimacy, navigating the emotional complexities of celibacy and societal pressures. The conversation also touches on the significance of self-discovery and overcoming religious trauma, offering advice on building healthy connections and reclaiming power. Their candid discussion promotes empowerment, curiosity, and the joy of embracing intimacy.

Mar 4, 2025 • 52min
How To Interview Someone
Sam Fragoso, host of Talk Easy, is renowned for his insightful interviews with celebrities and family members. In this discussion, he highlights the art of meaningful interviews and the importance of creating a comfortable space for dialogue. Sam shares challenges of personal interviews, especially with family, emphasizing their power in preserving personal histories. He reflects on his parents' legacies and encourages listeners to explore their own motivations for documenting stories, advocating for authenticity in capturing the essence of loved ones.

28 snips
Mar 1, 2025 • 29min
Supercommunicators | 2. How to Communicate Without Words
Delve into the fascinating world of nonverbal communication, where gestures and facial expressions often speak louder than words. Explore how sitcom legends like The Big Bang Theory masterfully use these cues to enhance emotional depth. Gain insight into the impact of tone and body language on personal connections, revealing secrets that can transform everyday interactions. Hear expert opinions and personal stories that highlight the significance of subtle behaviors in fostering understanding and trust.
Remember Everything You Learn from Podcasts
Save insights instantly, chat with episodes, and build lasting knowledge - all powered by AI.