I Wish You Knew

Exploring the complexities of Quiet Disorganized Attachment, Adam delves into its isolating effects on relationships. He reveals how childhood trauma shapes this hidden style and often eludes psychological identification. Distinguishing between loud and quiet expressions, he highlights the perfectionism and private despair faced by those affected. Listeners learn actionable steps for healing and the possibility of transformation, emphasizing the importance of safe relationships and practical skills for understanding and support.

What happens when an avoidant man confronts harsh emotional realities? The discussion tackles childhood trauma impacting relationships and jealousy issues in a unique light. Emotional shutdowns and the need for control are examined, revealing how they hinder intimacy. The host emphasizes building trust and emotional safety, exploring tools to reframe criticism positively. Insights on teaching without intimidation and practical feedback delivery unfold alongside strategies for co-regulation—crafted to strengthen their bond.

In this engaging discussion, Adam Lane Smith, an attachment specialist and relationship coach, dives into the complexities of avoidant men and their struggles with love. He explains how avoidant attachment forms and its hidden stressors, while contrasting it with secure attachment styles. Adam shares insights on disorganized attachment, variations in avoidant behaviors, and practical steps to foster secure connections. Highlighting neuroplasticity, he emphasizes that transformation is possible at any age, providing hope and strategies for healthier relationships.

Adam Lane Smith, an attachment specialist and coach, dives into why avoidant men struggle with emotional closeness. He discusses the 'cone of death' metaphor, illustrating how stress can hinder connection. Adam shares practical tools for couples, including breathing techniques and the importance of intentional validation. He delves into the chronic dissatisfaction avoidant men feel and how partners can foster a nurturing environment. Learn about shifting from stress to relaxation for improved intimacy and the role of authentic compliments in strengthening relationships.

Why does avoidant attachment make it so hard to feel close, even in loving relationships? For many men, emotional distance isn’t a lack of love—it’s a stress-driven response that blocks connection. This video unpacks the psychology and biology behind avoidant patterns and offers tools to create healthier intimacy. Topics Covered 👉 Emotional shutdown and chronic unavailability in avoidant men 👉 The “cone of death” metaphor for limited tolerance of closeness under stress 👉 How stress blocks oxytocin receptors and hinders bonding 👉 Practical tools like breathing and nervous system regulation 👉 The difficulty avoidant men have with receiving praise or validation 👉 The importance of intentional connection and balanced effort in relationships 👉 Recognizing overservice and its role in creating emotional distance 👉 Shifting from constant stress mode into rest and relaxation for better connection Want to go deeper? Join me for this free training and learn practical strategies to overcome avoidant attachment and build stronger relationships https://get.adamlanesmith.com/freeregistration If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love 'Dr. Orion Taraban: Why Modern Men Are Failing at Intimacy'. Watch here: https://youtu.be/rYdzdGReDqg Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/@AttachmentAdam  Work with Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist: 1- https://adamlanesmith.com/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  2- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/how-to-love-an-avoidant-man/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  3- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/the-attachment-bootcamp/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  4- https://adamlanesmith.com/work-with-me/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  5- https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-repair/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  Want to learn your attachment style, and sign up for Adam's weekly newsletter? Click the link below to receive your copy and sign up now. https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  If you want to know your attachment style , take our free attachment quiz: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  Connect with Adam on your second preferred platform: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/  TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro  X: https://twitter.com/adamlanesmith  Threads: https://www.threads.com/@attachmentadam  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AdamLaneSmith/  I Wish You Knew Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_uRUnpQwNZb_WG76TxTTw?sub_confirmation=1

A remarkable journey unfolds as a woman shares her transformation from avoidant attachment to a secure partnership in just eight weeks. Early trauma and unhealthy relationships are explored as roots of avoidance. The conversation reveals practical tools for building safety and trust, emphasizing the power of co-regulation. Listeners gain insights into shifting from hyper-independence to interdependence, redefining femininity, and navigating love without fear. Growth and hope for relational change shine throughout this engaging dialogue.

A woman shares her profound journey of feeling invisible for 23 years due to her husband's gambling addiction and emotional neglect. They delve into the necessity of emotional intimacy and the challenges of rebuilding trust. The importance of accountability, safety, and clear communication in mending relationships is emphasized. They discuss the deep impact of past experiences and the transformative journey towards healing, reconnecting, and fostering emotional connections, highlighting the roadmap to recovery and restoration.

Dr. Caroline Leaf, a cognitive neuroscientist and bestselling author, shares her insights on the transformative power of the mind over the brain. She debunks the 21-day myth, introducing her 63-day approach to reshape thoughts and relationships. Discover how trauma is processed in the mind before being stored in the brain, and learn about the importance of understanding attachment styles. Dr. Leaf provides practical strategies to deconstruct harmful patterns, emphasizing that real change requires commitment and self-awareness.

In this conversation, Amy Moore shares her candid journey with disorganized attachment, detailing her struggles with both avoidance and anxiety. She highlights the profound impact of childhood trauma on adult relationships and emphasizes the necessity of emotional safety and oxytocin bonding. Amy discusses practical steps for healing, such as fostering self-awareness and trust through open communication, especially in parenting. Her insights shed light on the complexities of navigating personal relationships while working towards a healthier connection with oneself.

Max Trombly, who guides men towards emotional growth through supportive circles, shares profound insights into overcoming emotional numbness. He discusses the hidden emotional struggles men face and why purpose is crucial for growth. The conversation emphasizes the importance of emotional intimacy in relationships and how resentment can damage connections. Max also explores the transformative role of women in sparking masculine development and the necessity of mutual respect for healing. This exchange offers valuable tools for men seeking deeper connections and fulfillment.