I Wish You Knew

Adam Lane Smith & Andrey Korikov
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Aug 8, 2025 • 1h 24min

Dr. Orion Taraban: Why Modern Men Are Failing at Intimacy

Not everyone, especially modern men, should be in a relationship and Dr. Orion Taraban returns to explore exactly why. In this video, Dr. Orion Taraban and Adam dive deep into the emotional wounds, subconscious needs, and hidden motivations that shape modern relationships.   Topics Covered 👉 Why healing must come before entering a relationship 👉 The evolving nature of needs and desires in long-term relationships 👉 How relationships mirror addiction and recovery cycles 👉 The psychology behind trauma bonding and emotional dependency 👉 Why many people stay in bad relationships out of fear or familiarity 👉 Transactional intimacy and the negotiation of emotional needs 👉 The "crisis of disillusionment" after initial attraction fades 👉 Relationship value and the sexual marketplace 👉 Why people struggle to assess their own worth in relationships If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love '5 Harsh Truths About Marriage I Would Tell My Daughter. Watch here: https://youtu.be/lnZweecoi6k   Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/@AttachmentAdam  Work with Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist: 1- https://adamlanesmith.com/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  2- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/how-to-love-an-avoidant-man/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  3- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/the-attachment-bootcamp/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  4- https://adamlanesmith.com/work-with-me/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  5- https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-repair/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  Want to learn your attachment style, and sign up for Adam's weekly newsletter? Click the link below to receive your copy and sign up now. https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  If you want to know your attachment style , take our free attachment quiz: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  Connect with Adam on your second preferred platform: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/  TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro  X: https://twitter.com/adamlanesmith  Threads: https://www.threads.com/@attachmentadam  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AdamLaneSmith/  I Wish You Knew Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_uRUnpQwNZb_WG76TxTTw?sub_confirmation=1 Follow Dr. Orion Taraban: Youtube:  @psychacks   Website: https://oriontarabanpsyd.com/  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/psyc.hacks/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/PsycHacks/100090053889622/  Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@oriontaraban        Twitter /X: https://twitter.com/oriontaraban  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ #modernmen #relationships #selfawareness
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Aug 1, 2025 • 1h 11min

Why He Can’t Say “I Love You” (Even If He Feels It)

This episode explores why some men struggle to say “I love you” even when they truly feel it. It is not always about a lack of love.  It is often about emotional wiring, past experiences, and how they process vulnerability. By understanding these deeper reasons, you can navigate the silence with more clarity and compassion.  Topics Covered:  👉 Emotional barriers that block verbal expressions of love 👉 How upbringing and past relationships shape communication patterns 👉 The role of attachment styles in expressing affection 👉 Why actions sometimes speak louder than words for certain men 👉 Healthy ways to navigate and respond when “I love you” is hard to say If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love '5 Harsh Truths About Marriage I Would Tell My Daughter. Watch here: https://youtu.be/lnZweecoi6k   Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/@AttachmentAdam  Work with Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist: 1- https://adamlanesmith.com/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  2- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/how-to-love-an-avoidant-man/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  3- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/the-attachment-bootcamp/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  4- https://adamlanesmith.com/work-with-me/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  5- https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-repair/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  Want to learn your attachment style, and sign up for Adam's weekly newsletter? Click the link below to receive your copy and sign up now. https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  If you want to know your attachment style , take our free attachment quiz: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  Connect with Adam on your second preferred platform: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/  TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro  X: https://twitter.com/adamlanesmith  Threads: https://www.threads.com/@attachmentadam  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AdamLaneSmith/  I Wish You Knew Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_uRUnpQwNZb_WG76TxTTw?sub_confirmation=1
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Jul 29, 2025 • 1h 30min

Modern Dating Is Exhausting For Women - Learn How To Finally Feel Loved

Quiet disorganized attachment can make modern women feel invisible—shutting down out of fear of being “too much,” even when all they want is to be seen and loved. In this episode, Dawn Dubelbeis opens up about the impact of childhood trauma and how her attachment style shaped her adult relationships. Alongside Adam, they unpack the path of how to build connection from a place of safety, not survival. Topics Covered  👉 How quiet disorganized attachment shows up in adult relationships 👉 Why women with this attachment style often feel invisible or “too much” 👉 The biological role of vasopressin and oxytocin in bonding 👉 The shutdown response: why emotions go numb and conflict feels unsafe 👉 The cost of not asking for help—and how to start 👉 Using emotional check-ins and clarity to build connection 👉 What secure men actually need from women (and why silence confuses them) 👉 How to create an emotionally safe, sustainable relationship 👉 Turning your nervous system from shutdown to connection 👉 Making your life inhospitable to avoidant partners—and safe for the right ones If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love '5 Harsh Truths About Marriage I Would Tell My Daughter. Watch here: https://youtu.be/lnZweecoi6k   Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/@AttachmentAdam  Work with Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist: 1- https://adamlanesmith.com/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  2- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/how-to-love-an-avoidant-man/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  3- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/the-attachment-bootcamp/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  4- https://adamlanesmith.com/work-with-me/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  5- https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-repair/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  Want to learn your attachment style, and sign up for Adam's weekly newsletter? Click the link below to receive your copy and sign up now. https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  If you want to know your attachment style , take our free attachment quiz: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  Connect with Adam on your second preferred platform: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/  TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro  X: https://twitter.com/adamlanesmith  Threads: https://www.threads.com/@attachmentadam  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AdamLaneSmith/  I Wish You Knew Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_uRUnpQwNZb_WG76TxTTw?sub_confirmation=1
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Jul 18, 2025 • 1h 15min

The Attachment Style That’s Been Ignored for 80 Years

Attachment style plays a bigger role in your relationships than you think, especially when it’s the one no one talks about. In this episode, Adam explore the long-ignored freeze attachment style, rooted in fearful-avoidant patterns. After surviving childhood trauma, narcissistic abuse, and three failed marriages, Corina shares how this attachment style shaped her life and how she’s learning to heal. Topics Covered: 👉 What the freeze attachment style looks like in real life 👉 How fearful-avoidant attachment develops through trauma 👉 Why some attachment styles cause emotional shutdown or mutism 👉 How attachment style impacts communication and intimacy 👉 Rebuilding relationships after narcissistic abuse 👉 Parenting teens with different attachment needs 👉 Tools for communicating with partners who shut down emotionally 👉 Reframing your identity and rebuilding self-worth If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love 'Why She Doesn’t Want You (Even If She Loves You) '. Watch here:  https://youtu.be/aUMUEbwcVuo Need more help with your attachment? Work with Adam: www.adamlanesmith.com  ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Follow the “I Wish You Knew” Podcast: -------------------------------------------------- Website:    https://iwishyouknew.show/    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theiwishyouknewpodcast/   Tiktok:        https://www.tiktok.com/@iwishyouknewshow    Snapchat:  https://www.snapchat.com/iwishyouknewpod    Twitter /X:  https://twitter.com/iwishyouknewpod   Spotify:      https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ncc0MBgm04xTIQ5ByiCGI   Apple:        https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-wish-you-knew/id1713427809   ------------------------------------------------- Follow Adam Lane Smith: -------------------------------------------------- Website: https://adamlanesmith.com/   Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg      Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/   Twitter /X: https://x.com/AdamLaneSmith   Threads:   https://www.threads.net/@attachmentadam   Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro  The next episode drops Thursday :) See you there.
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Jul 11, 2025 • 1h 7min

What Makes an Avoidant Man Feel Safe Enough to Stay

What does it take for an Avoidant Man to finally feel safe enough to stay in love?  In this episode, Kimmi returns to share his journey from emotional shutdown to engagement. Once known as “Kimmi the Avoidant,” he opens up about what helped him finally connect, feel secure, and build lasting love.  Topics Covered:  👉 How avoidant attachment distorts emotional connection 👉 Why emotional safety—not pressure—creates commitment 👉 The surprising impact of oxytocin, magnesium, and sleep 👉 How routines and rituals help avoidant men feel secure 👉 The “emotional baby” stage and how to move through it 👉 Avoidant men’s biggest fear: dying alone and unremembered 👉 How to spot emotional bids and respond like a secure partner 👉 The CEO analogy for leading your relationship well 👉 How to continuously grow closer in long-term love If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love 'Why She Doesn’t Want You (Even If She Loves You) '. Watch here:  https://youtu.be/aUMUEbwcVuo Need more help with your attachment? Work with Adam: www.adamlanesmith.com  ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Follow the “I Wish You Knew” Podcast: -------------------------------------------------- Website:    https://iwishyouknew.show/    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theiwishyouknewpodcast/   Tiktok:        https://www.tiktok.com/@iwishyouknewshow    Snapchat:  https://www.snapchat.com/iwishyouknewpod    Twitter /X:  https://twitter.com/iwishyouknewpod   Spotify:      https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ncc0MBgm04xTIQ5ByiCGI   Apple:        https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-wish-you-knew/id1713427809   ------------------------------------------------- Follow Adam Lane Smith: -------------------------------------------------- Website: https://adamlanesmith.com/   Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg      Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/   Twitter /X: https://x.com/AdamLaneSmith   Threads:   https://www.threads.net/@attachmentadam   Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro  The next episode drops Thursday :) See you there.
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Jul 4, 2025 • 1h 16min

Why Avoidant Men Can’t Love You (Until This Happens)

Avoidant men aren’t emotionally distant by choice. Their detachment is often a survival response wired deep into the brain. In this episode, Adam breaks down how avoidant men develop this style of relating, why avoidant men often carry it into adulthood, and most importantly how to help avoidant men heal for good. Topics covered: 👉 The brain science behind avoidant men and emotional shutdown 👉 Why avoidant men experience burnout, disconnection, and chronic stress 👉 The role of vasopressin bonding in helping avoidant men build trust 👉 Why securely attached partners often trigger avoidant men 👉 How avoidant men can rewire their brains through real world emotional experiences 👉 The shame core driving avoidant men since childhood 👉 Step by step strategies to help avoidant men build emotional safety 👉 How avoidant men struggle with intimacy, relationships, and legacy 👉 What partners of avoidant men need to understand 👉 Tools, supplements, and lifestyle shifts that support healing for avoidant men If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love 'Why She Doesn’t Want You (Even If She Loves You) '. Watch here:  https://youtu.be/aUMUEbwcVuo Need more help with your attachment? Work with Adam: www.adamlanesmith.com  ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Follow the “I Wish You Knew” Podcast: -------------------------------------------------- Website:    https://iwishyouknew.show/    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theiwishyouknewpodcast/   Tiktok:        https://www.tiktok.com/@iwishyouknewshow    Snapchat:  https://www.snapchat.com/iwishyouknewpod    Twitter /X:  https://twitter.com/iwishyouknewpod   Spotify:      https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ncc0MBgm04xTIQ5ByiCGI   Apple:        https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-wish-you-knew/id1713427809   ------------------------------------------------- Follow Adam Lane Smith: -------------------------------------------------- Website: https://adamlanesmith.com/   Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg      Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/   Twitter /X: https://x.com/AdamLaneSmith   Threads:   https://www.threads.net/@attachmentadam   Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro  The next episode drops Thursday :) See you there.
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Jun 27, 2025 • 48min

Her Unbelievable Plan to Make an Avoidant Man Say ‘I Do’!

In this episode, Andrey shares how he went from emotionally avoidant to fully committed in marriage. He breaks down the exact values, mindset shifts, and moments that made him stay.  Adam and Andrey explore how real love forms not through perfection, but through shared vision and integrity. This is a blueprint for building lasting connection with an avoidant man. Topics Covered: 👉 What makes an avoidant man choose commitment 👉 How to build lasting love with an avoidant man 👉 The values that made her “the one” 👉 Why a woman’s boundaries increase attraction 👉 How she helped him cross the dopamine crash 👉 What avoidant men secretly need to trust 👉 The power of shared vision, timelines, and direction 👉 Why self-abandonment ruins real connection If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love 'Why She Doesn’t Want You (Even If She Loves You) '. Watch here:  https://youtu.be/aUMUEbwcVuo Need more help with your attachment? Work with Adam: www.adamlanesmith.com  ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Follow the “I Wish You Knew” Podcast: -------------------------------------------------- Website:    https://iwishyouknew.show/    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theiwishyouknewpodcast/   Tiktok:        https://www.tiktok.com/@iwishyouknewshow    Snapchat:  https://www.snapchat.com/iwishyouknewpod    Twitter /X:  https://twitter.com/iwishyouknewpod   Spotify:      https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ncc0MBgm04xTIQ5ByiCGI   Apple:        https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-wish-you-knew/id1713427809   ------------------------------------------------- Follow Adam Lane Smith: -------------------------------------------------- Website: https://adamlanesmith.com/   Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg      Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/   Twitter /X: https://x.com/AdamLaneSmith   Threads:   https://www.threads.net/@attachmentadam   Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro  The next episode drops Thursday :) See you there.
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9 snips
Jun 20, 2025 • 1h 12min

Why Do I Feel Unlovable No Matter How Hard I Try?

Emily Humpert, known for her candid discussions on attachment issues, joins host Adam Lane Smith to explore emotional intimacy and the struggles of feeling unlovable. They dive into how perfectionism and shame can damage relationships, the difference between emotional safety and intimacy, and the importance of vulnerability. Additionally, they discuss the role of vasopressin in bonding, and the healing potential of emotional intimacy. This enlightening conversation offers hope and practical insights for those navigating the complex world of attachment.
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11 snips
Jun 14, 2025 • 1h 1min

Why She Doesn’t Want You (Even If She Loves You) | Adam Lane Smith | The Attachment Specialist

Explore the critical balance between love and emotional safety in relationships. Discover how attachment theory can reshape your perspective on connection. Learn about effective communication methods, including the benefits of text messaging for anxious partners. Delve into the importance of rebuilding trust and emotional bonds through consistent positive experiences. Uncover the innovative COO/CEO model for emotional teamwork and the value of vulnerability in conversations. Plus, hear strategies for nurturing a legacy of emotional safety for future generations.
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Jun 6, 2025 • 56min

STOP Doing These 3 Things If You Want Him to Commit | Margarita Nazarenko & Adam Lane Smith

In this conversation, Adam welcomes Margarita Nazarenko, a viral voice of tough love on relationships, for a deep, honest dialogue about anxious attachment, emotional patterns, and why so many women end up chasing emotionally unavailable men. Margarita offers clarity, accountability, and practical wisdom to break the cycle of toxic relationships and build something truly healthy. Topics Covered: 👉 Why women with anxious attachment chase emotionally unavailable men 👉 The damage of mothering men and the false thrill of romantic pursuit 👉 How childhood wounds and abandonment issues shape relationship patterns 👉 The long term impact of emotionally absent fathers on children 👉 How to stop repeating generational pain through conscious healing 👉 Why secure, available men are often overlooked by anxious women 👉 A practical inner child healing practice to rewire your attachment style 👉 The difference between genuine connection and trauma bonds 👉 How to protect your energy, value, and future as a woman 👉 Why waiting to be chosen doesn’t make you weak, it makes you wise You deserve to be chosen, cherished, and safe, not constantly chasing love that won’t stay. If this episode resonated, don’t forget to subscribe and share it with someone who needs to hear this truth. More raw and transformative conversations coming soon. Stay tuned for more expert insights and relationship advice in future episodes! If you enjoyed this episode, you will probably love our episode titled ‘Attachment Specialist Fixes an Avoidant Woman’  https://youtu.be/zSaZrRedRUc  Need more help with your attachment? Work with Adam: www.adamlanesmith.com  ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Follow the “I Wish You Knew” Podcast: -------------------------------------------------- Website:    https://iwishyouknew.show/  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theiwishyouknewpodcast/  Tiktok:        https://www.tiktok.com/@iwishyouknewshow  Snapchat:  https://www.snapchat.com/iwishyouknewpod   Twitter /X:  https://twitter.com/iwishyouknewpod  Spotify:      https://open.spotify.com/show/4Ncc0MBgm04xTIQ5ByiCGI  Apple:        https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/i-wish-you-knew/id1713427809  -------------------------------------------------- Follow Adam Lane Smith: -------------------------------------------------- Website: https://adamlanesmith.com/  Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg     Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/  Twitter /X: https://x.com/AdamLaneSmith  Threads:   https://www.threads.net/@attachmentadam  Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro  Margarita Nazarenko: Website: https://www.margaritanazarenko.com IG: https://www.instagram.com/margarita.nazarenko?igsh=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ== Youtube: https://youtube.com/@Margarita.Nazarenko?si=4FjXe2NpgP0fer21 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@margarita.nazarenko?_t=ZS-8vAmQU2w0b2&_r=1 -------------------------------------------------- The next episode drops Thursday :) See you there. Visit: https://iwishyouknew.show/ to lean more about the podcast

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