Negotiating with High Conflict Personalities: A Transformative ApproachIn this enlightening episode of It's All Your Fault, hosts Megan Hunter and Bill Eddy from the High Conflict Institute welcome Michèle Huff, author of "The Transformative Negotiator: Changing the Way We Come to Agreement." Through her experience as a transactional lawyer and current executive director at UC Berkeley's Office of Business Contracts and Brand Protection, Huff shares insights that align perfectly with managing high conflict situations while maintaining humanity and connection.The conversation explores how Huff's unique approach to negotiation - emphasizing internal transformation and human connection - can be particularly effective when dealing with high conflict personalities. Drawing from Buddhist principles and years of experience in Silicon Valley, Huff explains how understanding oneself becomes crucial when facing challenging behaviors in negotiations. Bill and Megan connect these concepts to their extensive work with high conflict personalities, showing how transformative negotiation techniques can help manage difficult situations.The discussion delves into practical strategies for maintaining composure when faced with high conflict behaviors, including the use of "anchoring" techniques and mindful breathing. Particularly valuable is the exploration of how these methods can work even in high-stakes business environments where traditional aggressive negotiation tactics are common. The episode also addresses cultural differences in negotiation styles, offering insights into managing high conflict situations across cultural boundaries.Questions we answer in this episode:How do you maintain effectiveness when dealing with high conflict personalities?What techniques help keep negotiations productive when emotions run high?How can you recognize early warning signs of high conflict behavior in negotiations?When should you walk away from a negotiation?What role does self-awareness play in managing difficult negotiations?Key Takeaways:Understanding your own triggers helps manage high conflict situationsHuman connection can defuse potentially volatile negotiationsPhysical and emotional well-being directly impacts negotiation successSetting appropriate boundaries is crucial in high conflict situationsTransformative negotiation techniques work in both personal and professional contextsThis episode provides essential insights for anyone who deals with high conflict personalities in negotiations, from business professionals to mediators to individuals managing personal relationships. Huff's approach to transformative negotiation, combined with Bill and Megan's expertise in high conflict personalities, offers practical strategies for achieving better outcomes while maintaining professional boundaries and personal well-being.Links & Other NotesBOOKSThe Transformative Negotiator: Changing the Way We Come to Agreement (Revised & Updated Edition)Purchase on our website: https://www.unhookedmedia.com/stock/p/transformative-negotiator-fcgdxPurchase on AmazonGUEST MICHELE HUFF WEBSITEhttps://michelehuff.com/2nd-edition-book/ARTICLESRead Michele’s blogOUR WEBSITE: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/Submit a Question for Bill and MeganAll of our books can be found in our online store or anywhere books are sold, including as e-books.You can also find these show notes at our site as well.Note: We are not diagnosing anyone in our discussions, merely discussing general patterns of behavior. Nor are we providing legal of therapeutic advice. Please seek the assistance of your local professionals to seek help. (00:00) - Welcome to It's All Your Fault (01:43) - Michèle Huff (05:27) - Her Background (11:28) - Book’s Title (13:15) - Soft Skills in Negotiations (17:37) - Transferring Skills (20:55) - Mistakes in Negotiating (25:51) - Negotiating with HCPs (34:28) - Caring and Authenticity (40:38) - Finding Your Anchors and Keeping Deadlines at Bay (45:53) - Resistance (50:27) - Dedication (54:13) - Wrap Up (55:00) - Reminders & Coming Next Week: Kara Rubenstein on DNA Surprises Learn more about our Conflict Influencer Class. Get started today!

In this engaging conversation, retired Judge Bruce Cohen shares his extensive knowledge of family law and unpacks the crucial difference between assertiveness and aggressiveness in court. He emphasizes how assertive communication can lead to better outcomes in custody disputes, while aggression often escalates conflict. The discussion also touches on managing high-conflict personalities without resorting to diagnosing, focusing on behavior instead. Judge Cohen provides practical tips for legal writing and presenting cases effectively, ensuring clarity and impact in family court.

Explore the fascinating link between anger and high-conflict personalities with insights from Bill Eddy and Megan Hunter. Discover the surprising findings from Ohio State University that challenge traditional anger management techniques. Learn how distinct personality traits influence the way individuals express anger, and the critical role of emotional regulation in interpersonal conflicts. The duo highlights the power of human connection, revealing practical strategies for managing anger and fostering positive communication.

Explore the intricacies of emotion dysregulation, particularly its ties to borderline personality disorder. Delve into how childhood experiences and brain structure impact emotional responses. Learn to differentiate between typical teenage angst and concerning behaviors, all while gaining insights from nature’s calming effects on mental health. Discover therapeutic interventions that can foster emotional regulation, equipping parents with strategies to support their children in navigating the complexities of their feelings and today’s social media influences.

Cherolyn Knapp, a workplace conflict expert from the High Conflict Institute and experienced lawyer and mediator, shares her insights on emotional management in professional settings. She discusses the phenomenon of emotional contagion and how unmanaged emotions can escalate conflicts. Cherolyn introduces practical techniques like the 'calm before think' approach, grounding exercises, and positive self-talk to foster resilience. The importance of investing time in emotional management is emphasized, demonstrating how it can enhance productivity and workplace harmony.

Explore how conflicts at home can drain emotional resources and impact workplace performance. Discover the neuroscience behind stress responses and the role of self-encouragement in maintaining resilience. Gain insights into establishing effective communication with employers while managing personal issues. Learn to create a supportive workplace environment that nurtures mental well-being. Engaging stories and practical strategies make this discussion both relatable and informative, addressing the intricate balance between personal struggles and professional growth.

Dive into the fascinating world of psychopathy as experts discuss its origins and how personality traits develop by age six. Discover whether someone can suddenly become psychopathic and explore the intricate interplay of genetics, childhood experiences, and culture. You'll find insights on identifying warning signs in relationships and workplaces, alongside practical advice for navigating interactions with high conflict individuals. The conversation also highlights the historical advantages of these traits and the necessity of empathy in relationships.

Dive into the complex world of psychopathy and its staggering $460 billion annual toll on the U.S. criminal justice system. The hosts uncover early warning signs of antisocial personality disorder and emphasize the vital role of intervention. Learn about psychopathy's three key traits: disinhibition, callousness, and boldness, and how they impact relationships and the corporate world. Gain insights into modern diagnostic approaches that treat traits as a spectrum, opening doors for better understanding and management of these challenging behaviors.

Join retired Judge Bruce R. Cohen, who spent nearly two decades on the bench in Arizona, as he shares his wealth of experience in family law. He discusses the evolution of the 'best interests of the child' standard, moving beyond gender bias to focus on individual needs. Bruce shares personal stories that highlight the importance of recognizing humanity in each case. He offers practical insights for parents on how to effectively present their cases in court, emphasizing the child's well-being over past conflicts.

Explore the five personality disorders that drive high conflict behaviors. Discover traits like blaming others and all-or-nothing thinking, which complicate interactions. Learn how these personalities manifest in various situations, including divorce and workplace disputes. The conversation dives into the manipulative nature of antisocial personalities and highlights the importance of recognizing harmful patterns. With real-life examples and practical insights, gain strategies to navigate these challenging relationships effectively.