Becoming Me

Episode 141   In this episode, I delve into how our healing from complex trauma also heals our image of God. Drawing from my own experiences since 2008, I discuss three types of trauma—emotional neglect, emotional/spiritual abuse, and enmeshment trauma—and their impact on our relationship with God. I explain how authentic love and healing can reshape these distorted images, drawing on personal stories and insights to illustrate this transformative process. I also address the challenges and fears that come with such profound changes in our understanding and experience of God. Join me as I share this deeply personal and challenging journey towards healing and a more authentic relationship with God.Watch this recording on YouTube.Follow me on my Instagram account @animann for more material on the integration journey and subscribe to my monthly reflections on Begin Again.CHAPTER MARKERS00:00 Introduction03:04 Healing the Image of God03:24 A Personal Healing Journey04:34 The Impact of Complex Trauma13:47 Understanding Emotional Neglect20:36 The Effects of Emotional and Spiritual Abuse25:11 Enmeshment Trauma and Its Consequences26:16 Understanding Enmeshment Trauma27:17 The Impact of Spiritual Abuse30:01 Healing Through Authentic Love31:33 Rewriting Our Story with God36:48 Embracing Emotional Freedom41:05 Navigating the Healing Journey47:16 The Role of the Holy Spirit in Healing52:09 Concluding Thoughts on Healing and GrowthTRANSCRIPTAvailable here.REFLECTION PROMPTDo you struggle to make an authentic self-gift of yourself without abandoning yourself? Where might you have learned that abandoning yourself is a good thing? Are you open to changing your mind and believing that it is authentic self-gift that Christ is inviting you to make?Support the showSUBSCRIBE | FOLLOW | SUPPORTSocial Media:Follow Ann Yeong on Instagram or Facebook.Newsletter:Subscribe to Begin Again for Ann's updates and reflections.Support the Show:Monthly Support (starting at USD$3)One-time DonationLeave a Review:If this podcast has blessed you, please leave a review by clicking here.

Episode 140  In this episode, I explore how complex trauma affects our ability to make spiritual discernment by making it difficult for us to have "holy indifference". Often times we know we struggle to have that detachment we need to make a good discernment, but we don't realise that our difficulties may not be due to spiritual failings but because of the wounds in our embodied emotional capacity for authentic, secure love.I discuss the importance of a secure attachment with God, the impact of trauma on our nervous system, how that affects our interior freedom, and how healing and integration can restore interior freedom in the discernment process. Watch this recording on YouTube.Follow me on my Instagram account @animann for more material on the integration journey and subscribe to my monthly reflections on Begin Again.CHAPTER MARKERS00:00 Trauma and Spiritual Discernment04:43 What Discernment Isn't14:28 How Trauma Impacts Discernment18:26 How Healing Transforms DiscernmentTRANSCRIPTAvailable here.REFLECTION PROMPTIs your experience of spiritual discernment one of deep security and detachment or are you often anxious about "making the correct discernment"? Can you identify one way in which complex trauma has affected the way you approach spiritual discernment?Support the showSUBSCRIBE | FOLLOW | SUPPORTSocial Media:Follow Ann Yeong on Instagram or Facebook.Newsletter:Subscribe to Begin Again for Ann's updates and reflections.Support the Show:Monthly Support (starting at USD$3)One-time DonationLeave a Review:If this podcast has blessed you, please leave a review by clicking here.

Episode 139  In this episode, I address a thought-provoking question from one of my subscribers who asked how can we experience the unconditional love of God. I delve into the concept of embodied spirituality, underscoring the indispensability of involving our entire being—body, senses, and soul—in our spiritual journey to connect with God's love more authentically. I share practical methods to engage with God in daily life which serve as pathways to recognise and feel His presence more tangibly. Moreover, I distinguish between feeling loved by God and truly soaking in His unconditional love. I discuss the significant role of psychological healing in experiencing God's love, highlighting techniques like inner child reparenting and the Internal Family Systems theory for deeper self-acceptance and love. I conclude by inviting viewers to embrace living the questions of their spiritual journey, focusing less on the unhealed parts of themselves and more on remaining attentive and responsive to God's ongoing presence and invitations to healing in our lives.Watch this recording on YouTube.Follow me on my Instagram account @animann for more material on the integration journey and subscribe to my monthly reflections on Begin Again.TRANSCRIPTAvailable here.REFLECTION PROMPTHave you asked God to let you experience his unconditional love? Do you do so regularly? (It is perhaps the simplest and most important prayer for our healing and integration journey!)Support the showSUBSCRIBE | FOLLOW | SUPPORTSocial Media:Follow Ann Yeong on Instagram or Facebook.Newsletter:Subscribe to Begin Again for Ann's updates and reflections.Support the Show:Monthly Support (starting at USD$3)One-time DonationLeave a Review:If this podcast has blessed you, please leave a review by clicking here.

Episode 138  In this personal narrative, I discuss my journey as a recovering complex trauma survivor, grappling with a deep-seated fear of criticism, judgment, and rejection, and how these fears intersect with my faith and my walk with Christ. I explore the concept of interior integration and the realisation that my fear of criticism was not just about a lack of faith, but a signal of deeper issues stemming from complex trauma and a lack of secure attachment with both myself and God. This sharing highlights my shift from viewing my fears through a purely spiritual lens to embracing a more integrated approach that incorporates psychological insight. I reflect on the importance of establishing boundaries, cultivating self-compassion, and adopting an embodied spirituality that brings healing to our relationship with God and ourselves.Watch this recording on YouTube.Follow me on my Instagram account @animann for more material on the integration journey and subscribe to my monthly reflections on Begin Again.CHAPTER MARKERS00:00 Introduction02:10 Spiritual vs. Integrated Approaches06:57 Healing Through Integration and Boundaries19:51 Overcoming Fear of Criticism22:52 The Power of Love and Secure AttachmentTRANSCRIPTAvailable here.REFLECTION PROMPTAre you very easily affected by praise or criticism too? What new perspective from this episode did you find helpful in your struggles with fearing criticism?Support the showSUBSCRIBE | FOLLOW | SUPPORTSocial Media:Follow Ann Yeong on Instagram or Facebook.Newsletter:Subscribe to Begin Again for Ann's updates and reflections.Support the Show:Monthly Support (starting at USD$3)One-time DonationLeave a Review:If this podcast has blessed you, please leave a review by clicking here.

Episode 137  In this episode, I delve into the journey of personal vocation discernment across different stages of faith, inspired by the book 'The Critical Journey: Stages in the Life of Faith'. I share my insights on how our inner journey and the process of discerning our personal calling evolves from the initial stages of discovering God, moving through discipleship and productivity, to questioning, doubt and interior wrestling, and finally towards a deeper integration and living out our vocation. Watch this recording on YouTube.Book: The Critical Journey: Stages in the Life of FaithFollow me on my Instagram account @animann for more material on the integration journey and subscribe to my newsletter Begin Again for written reflections about the interior journey.TRANSCRIPTAvailable here.REFLECTION PROMPTHow have you been approaching the discernment of your personal vocation? How has this episode given you new insight to your own journey and experience of discernment?Support the showSUBSCRIBE | FOLLOW | SUPPORTSocial Media:Follow Ann Yeong on Instagram or Facebook.Newsletter:Subscribe to Begin Again for Ann's updates and reflections.Support the Show:Monthly Support (starting at USD$3)One-time DonationLeave a Review:If this podcast has blessed you, please leave a review by clicking here.

Bonus Episode 136In this episode, I share some updates as my subscriber count has grown across various platforms. Whether you're new to my content or a long-time follower, I introduce myself, my journey, and my mission behind creating content to support the interior integration journey of deepening intimacy with God and psychological and emotional healing. I discuss the integration of intellectual and relational dimensions of faith, my personal experiences, and how they shape my content. I'll also provide updates on future content consolidation, my evolving journey, and why there might be a slower pace of new content in the near future. Your support and prayers during this time mean a lot to me. Let's continue this journey together! Watch this recording on YouTube.Support the showSUBSCRIBE | FOLLOW | SUPPORTSocial Media:Follow Ann Yeong on Instagram or Facebook.Newsletter:Subscribe to Begin Again for Ann's updates and reflections.Support the Show:Monthly Support (starting at USD$3)One-time DonationLeave a Review:If this podcast has blessed you, please leave a review by clicking here.

Episode 135 In this episode, I delve into the transition many of us experience from spiritual fervour to spiritual maturity, especially during deep healing and integration. I discuss the differences between these stages, focusing on their characteristics and how we respond to suffering. By sharing my personal experiences and insights into the stages of faith development, I aim to reassure you that losing initial spiritual passion is a natural part of maturing in faith. Join me as I offer a  look at how this journey helps us love more like God does. I hope this gives you hope and a new perspective on your spiritual path.Watch this recording on YouTube.Follow me on my Instagram account @animann for more material on the integration journey and subscribe to my monthly reflections on Begin Again.CHAPTER MARKERS00:00 Introduction to Spiritual Midlife Crisis05:05 Personal Journey Through Spiritual Crisis06:40 Discovering New Ways to Connect with God10:31 Navigating Spiritual Desert and Rediscovery18:19 Encountering Spiritual Midlife: A Turning Point21:22 Exploring the Midlife Spiritual Journey22:28 The Critical Journey: Understanding Spiritual Midlife23:59 The Wall: The Place of Crisis24:50 Integration and Healing: The Core of Spiritual Midlife28:44 Seeking Support and Resources During Spiritual Midlife38:07 The Importance of Trauma-Informed Support40:09 Embracing Uncertainty and Transformation41:16 Finding Your Path and Support in Spiritual MidlifeTRANSCRIPTAvailable here.REFLECTION PROMPTDo you struggle to make an authentic self-gift of yourself without abandoning yourself? Where might you have learned that abandoning yourself is a good thing? Are you open to changing your mind and believing that it is authentic self-gift that Christ is inviting you to make?Support the showSUBSCRIBE | FOLLOW | SUPPORTSocial Media:Follow Ann Yeong on Instagram or Facebook.Newsletter:Subscribe to Begin Again for Ann's updates and reflections.Support the Show:Monthly Support (starting at USD$3)One-time DonationLeave a Review:If this podcast has blessed you, please leave a review by clicking here.

Episode 134 Join me in this candid episode as I engage in a heartfelt conversation with trauma-informed and somatic-trained Catholic spiritual guide Edwina Yeow, founder of Anam Cara Ministries (Singapore). We delve into the deep connection between trauma, spirituality, and our relationship with God. Edwina, a seasoned Catholic spiritual director with 30 years of experience, shares invaluable insights on integrating spiritual direction, psychology, and somatic awareness to address trauma’s impact on our relationship with God. We discuss the importance of involving the body in spiritual healing and the role trauma plays in shaping our religious scripts. This episode encourages a spirit of curiosity towards healing, self-love, and deeper intimacy with God through a trauma-informed perspective.Watch this recording on YouTube.Follow me on my Instagram account @animann for more material on the integration journey and subscribe to my newsletter Begin Again for written reflections about the interior journey.RESOURCESEdwina Yeow's website.Other episodes with Edwina YeowTRANSCRIPTAvailable here.REFLECTION PROMPTWhich part of this conversation resonated with you the most? What could God be inviting you to ponder with him in your heart about the fears you have of losing his love for you?Support the showSUBSCRIBE | FOLLOW | SUPPORTSocial Media:Follow Ann Yeong on Instagram or Facebook.Newsletter:Subscribe to Begin Again for Ann's updates and reflections.Support the Show:Monthly Support (starting at USD$3)One-time DonationLeave a Review:If this podcast has blessed you, please leave a review by clicking here.

Episode 133 In this episode, I share my personal experience with spiritual midlife crisis.I share about the difficult and transformative phases of my journey, including moments of doubt, deep introspection, and the deconstruction of my previously held beliefs and practices. Through this challenging journey, I discovered crucial resources that guided me to understand the stages of faith development and the significance of the 'Wall', a pivotal point in one's spiritual midlife. I emphasise the importance of integrating one's emotional and spiritual aspects and the crucial role of seeking support through spiritual direction and psychotherapy. Resource:The Critical Journey, Stages in the Life of Faith by Janet O. Hagberg and Robert A. GuelichFalling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life by Richard RohrWhen the Heart Waits: Spiritual Direction for Life's Sacred Questions by Sue Monk KiddWatch this recording on YouTube.Follow me on my Instagram account @animann for more material on the integration journey and subscribe to my monthly reflections on Begin Again.CHAPTER MARKERSSee episode page for more details.TRANSCRIPTAvailable here.REFLECTION PROMPTHow have you experienced God's grace in moments of difficulty? In what ways do you need to trust that His grace is sufficient for your current challenges? Are there moments when you feel like you can’t keep going? How can you show yourself compassion during these times, knowing that it’s normal to feel this way? Remind yourself of God's compassion when you're feeling discouraged and trust in God, even when others don’t fully grasp what you’re going through.Support the showSUBSCRIBE | FOLLOW | SUPPORTSocial Media:Follow Ann Yeong on Instagram or Facebook.Newsletter:Subscribe to Begin Again for Ann's updates and reflections.Support the Show:Monthly Support (starting at USD$3)One-time DonationLeave a Review:If this podcast has blessed you, please leave a review by clicking here.

Episode 132 In this episode, I introduce and share reflections from “The Critical Journey: Stages in the Life of Faith," by Janet O. Hagberg and Robert A. Guelich. This remarkable resource opened my eyes to the stages of faith development, reinforcing the crucial role of experiential learning and integrating emotional healing with spiritual growth. I share insights from each of the six stages described in the book, weaving in reflections on my own progression and the introspective challenges encountered, especially the profound impact of confronting 'The Wall' in Stage 4. My aim is to offer solace by sharing my story and insights on navigating the complex landscapes of faith, hoping it will resonate with others on their own spiritual journeys, encouraging them towards embracing their path with understanding and compassion.Watch this recording on YouTube.Follow me on my Instagram account @animann for more material on the integration journey and subscribe to my monthly reflections on Begin Again.CHAPTER MARKERS(00:00:22) - Introduction(00:00:59) - Resource Introduction(00:02:05) - Discovering "The Critical Journey"(00:05:05) - Stages of Faith Development(00:13:50) - Stage 1: Recogition of God(00:15:09) - Stage 2: Life of Discpleship(00:17:34) - Stage 3: The Productive Life(00:22:13) - Stage 4: The Journey Inward(00:35:06) - Stage 5: The Journey Outward(00:38:30) - Stage 6: Life of Love(00:48:13) - Final Thoughts(00:49:24) - ConclusionTRANSCRIPTAvailable here.REFLECTION PROMPTReflect on your own journey towards healing and integration. How has your awareness evolved over time? Consider how your ability to serve others has changed. Who are you best able to support now compared to the past? Recall moments when you felt truly seen and understood in your struggles. What made those moments significant?Support the showSUBSCRIBE | FOLLOW | SUPPORTSocial Media:Follow Ann Yeong on Instagram or Facebook.Newsletter:Subscribe to Begin Again for Ann's updates and reflections.Support the Show:Monthly Support (starting at USD$3)One-time DonationLeave a Review:If this podcast has blessed you, please leave a review by clicking here.