100% Real With Ruby; nutrition, strength, fat loss, muscle, macros - without the fluff

IMPATIENCE PERFECTIONISM FIXATING ON STRUGGLES because our wins were never enough Hit a point where what you know you SHOULD do is also against what you THINK you should do So doing less, eating more is scary so you keep sabotaging yourself on your way there __ Being afraid to lose your leanness Especially if you had a history of being over weight & not being confident and trying hard to get there (mostly doing dumbshit) Sense of control that you can finally wear whatever you want and you didnt want to go back to it Scared to let go of control That the identity and perception of self is centered around there Fear of success - Oh no, now what… Mum making comments Anyone else judging other people Thoughts are not truths Feelings are not facts We may feel they are because we shape those around our upbringing and old beliefs But it takes alot of work to break those beliefs When your cognitive load is very high and you have all these thoughts in your brain you have little room for logic to happen This is why will power and discipline & motivation fall through You need to act as if and write as with and truly belief it and visualise it and then act in that way - Patience Overeating, self soothing, perfectionist & avoiding emotions Over analysing Wont take action at all If you are not taking action because you don't think youre going to be perfect then you arent even putting yourself up there to go out there How is that serving you if you arent allowing yourself Quell unsettling emotions You have a problem with yourself but wont do anything about it Now you have guilt and shame Now it leaks into other Alcohol Path of least resistance - not face it and 1- celebrate wins - its your evidence for when you are doing well Its showing you that you are capable Hey look at me making these changes you can do it Always write down at least 1 win ever single day, you will always find something in there and if you cant… youll start creating the reality of making them

Today ruby joins me to talk about the realities of transformation including: Pushing your comfort zones Committing to change Letting go of old identities Body image The confidence that comes from showing yourself you're capable of more Connect with Sarah: Instagram: @SarahFordBishop Connect with Ruby Instagram HERE @transformxruby

Dieting from the inside out podcast @realjaredhamilton @transformxruby Outer work without inner work doesn't work Do you leave space for your emotions? Throwing another diet at it or going harder isnt going to solve an inner game problem How can you escape a jail you don't know youre trapped inside of People don't know whats happening until they gain the weight back Your brain is addicted to taht struggle We crave whats most familiar - >> reticular activating system they believe everything they think and feel Nothing cool happens in pregnancy until 9 months later Perfectionism is the laziest standard because you know you cant live up to it Validating their bad behaviour ___ Take pride in showing up for yourself Not slowing down enough to even start making progress but we think because we are thrashing about and doing alot of HARD WORK in “ ” ” ”  we think we are making progress but we are jsut driving around the same block Importance of leaving space for emotions In the moment now - overwhelm is when there are no action steps and priorities and breaking things down Biggest issue is people want results now so they end up never really getting results because they don't shift their mindset Listening VS hearing - and we also do it to ourselves I TRAIN HARD BLAH BLAH BLAH ive been doing this for YEARS and i just was hoping to see results now - where do you think this usually stems from Not feeling motivated, will power… Then people finally starting on a proper program or whatever and thinking they should be soaring through with results because of how long theyve been doing things for without realising that the “”doing the things”” wasnt focused in the right direction Identity!!! self sabotage and developing a new routine how to develop patience and enjoy the journey - and reasons why people struggle with this the downfall of focusing on just a weight goal “ i don't know how to journal What do i journal Where do i start I don't know how to write on this stuff What do i even write on “Being positive” What does consistent mean >> what consistency means and what usually hinders this

So keen for this week's episode but in the mean time. A rant

Chat with my girl Jade

The REAL secret of getting your success & happiness NOW: What is consistency? What is CONFIDENCE? HOW do you get to that feeling you crave – that “outcome” Heres the real secret… You know when you nail a good week of nutrition & exercise and you’re feeling good? WHEN YOU DO THE THINGS YOU SAID YOU WERE GOING TO DO when you show up for YOU?? when you dont want to do something bu you do it anyway? That’s the happiness you’re after. THats pride, that's satisfaction THAT IS YOU WINNING! It’s not about the end result, it’s about the journey. Humans are driven by FORWARD ACTION in PURSUIT of something To CAPITALIZE on that, GET EXCITED in the pursuit itself… see THAT as your goal. not the goal itself. WHEN YOU DO HARD SHIT… THAT is what makes you feel empowered & confident. When you stop the comparisons and thinking you should be already perfect at new things. LIKE CALM TF DOWN – this is where you get all overwhelmed & want to tap out. When I was challenging myself to LONG RUNS (I didn’t like running that much BUT I freaking LOVED the feeling of getting through it & the end of it knowing I did it) I was like, one more lap, one more km, one more lap after the one more lap I BROKE IT INTO MINI PIECES as you should with YOUR visions. STOP THE GDAMN IMPATIENCE already… it is NOT serving you. We are meant to move toward a goal WHICH IS WHY we are forever chasing BUT….We don’t have clear vision; it’s just literally running away from our own tails & shadows... not toward the sunshine. AWAY from ghosts and pains, not toward the FEELINGS WE DO WANT - because what are they? we don’t even KNOW how to feel anymore When you move in the right direction, we release chemicals in our brains to keep us excited and on track. THAT IS HOW DOPAMINE WORKS So why aren’t you celebrating your EFFORTS? BELIEVING in yourself? Get. Rid. Of. Your. Timeline. Focus on the process, not the outcome. Find enjoyment in the day-to-day. STOP SKIMPING OUT ON YOUR LIFE EFFORT: celebrate it, embrace the feeling. You will make the process more enjoyable & realise that you can be happy, daily, right now, as long as you’re moving toward.

WHAT STANDARDS ARE YOU HOLDING YOURSELF TO? hows your balance of self compassion and discipline I forgot to mention the use of a PROS AND CONS LIST sometimes we FEEL there are more cons than there are until we start doing the things and realising the PROS, the CONS are born out of fear usually - or past predicaments any of you resonate with this?

@ericrobertsfitness @transformxruby Habits - not luck - not she just has it easy. motivation Most people arent in a calorie surplus but not intentionally Pre-requisites Built up the habits to allow that now And realising fatloss is the tiniest portion of it all There are certain things you need to sacrifice in the short term as well - people have swung too far and sadly many follow the wrong people who ARENT where they are because THOSE PEOPLE ARENT ONLINE or even confident to speak out People try to cash cheques their body cant pay Why is losing weight on its own a shitty goal? When you arent super motivated or shit gets hectic… that goal wont get you through that Here’s why “losing weight” is a sh*tty goal. There needs to be something deeper. there needs to be a reason WHY you are doing these things. Not just “lose 30lbs”. Because when you get tested… You will need to really know why you are doing this to keep you going and push through those times. Why having a goal weight and focusing on numbers can be the biggest selfsabotage Biggest workout mistakes & biggest mistakes you see females make to get their goal body Body image “i love my body” isnt what people say very day People thinking that being happy with their body and loving their body and NOT focusing on the scale or fatloss means they are giving up on success Power of environment and how sometimes you need much more discipline, saying no, tradeoffs and cutting the bullshit 8:25 – fatloss will take your whole life if you do it the wrong way - If you keep putting your goals on hold when shit goes crazy - Lose motivation Fear of gaining more weight – getting worse people think its supposed to be easy because those are the people posting online – well who YOU see anyway because of who you unconsciously choose to pick info from The energy, fatigue – people go to bloods and etcetc to see whats wrong with them I feel like people who have the most focus on their body and scale DON’T HAVE A BIG LIST HAVE A KILL LIST

Twitter @drgarymend IG @drgarymendoza  Stages Of Change @transformxruby  Q: What are the barriers to change? Someone thinks they are ready for change Habits don’t die It’s a slow process  Little things at a time They feel its not worth their time And when life is crazy or work is crazy, (it always is and we kid ourselves saying its going to calm down)  Our brain loves easy  Yet we try to complicate things more because SM makes it look fancy And we can do this with the way we approach food, always needing a whole new thing every single day instead of having a routine, or something on autopilot PULL goal FEEL like BE LIKE “goal” “time” Social media doesn’t have time It has now now now or you are behind Results should be a weekly metric like fuck off haha  “consciously” Understanding yourself  Q: Why does self talk often stop change? Relapse is part of the process  Clients will often view a relapse as a failure and use it as a reason to give up on the programme. Part of the reason for this is the trainers/coach’s failure to explain that relapse is actually an important part of the overall process. It may also be the case that the client has set up unrealistic expectations as to what they can achieve, this is known as ‘barrier underestimation’. Lower your expectations at the start - how did that work for you before? Right back to the start? FEEDBACK not failure. Learn from it It is important to temper a client’s initial high expectation at the start of a programme with a dose of reality. They may have tried to get fit/lose weight before without too much success, but they quickly forget these failed attempts. Get them to think about what has happened in the past and draw upon these events. They will often see these past experiences as evidence of failure so if you can get them to look on them as feedback and learn from them it will make this next attempt more likely to succeed. Also going forward they will now have a more realistic outlook and not view the next relapse as a reason to quit. ___________________________________________ Start without too high of an expectation that the only other option is letting yourself down. Dip your toes in and take it slow - view it as a lifestyle thing.

Falling in love with the process is what gets you to the outcome. // Obsessing over the outcome has you miss out on the process so you will never keep the result that you get /// & you'll never feel satisfied because you'll get carried away in chasing outcomes that never arrive /// because it's never enough and you can never change yourself nor brought life with you