Sometimes things show up in the workspace that we don't want and didn't anticipate. In this episode, my guest Jacquelyn Thorp and I discuss what to do when someone on your team smells and is causing issues for colleagues. Jacquelyn brings her experience from handling this situation many times to help us address this proactively. Community Feedback USA: (949) 38-LEARN Global: +1 (949) 385-3276 Twitter: @DaveStachowiak #CFLshow feedback@coachingforleaders.com Special Guest: Jacquelyn Thorp, SPHR-CA CEO, Train Me Today (888) 926-2644 Community Feedback USA: (949) 38-LEARN Global: +1 (949) 385-3276 Twitter: @DaveStachowiak #CFLshow feedback@coachingforleaders.com Our first live webinar launches within the next month! If you have a suggestion for our first topic, email me at feedback@coachingforleaders.com and be sure you are on my weekly article list. You can subscribe at this link. Thank you to Leonidas Santos, Frank Medeiros, David Peach, Sean McClure, Christian Torres, Adam Bryce, and Barbara Ziokowska for either liking our page on Facebook or following me on Google+ Want a booster-shot mid-week? I send a weekly article via email so you can stay connected with our community and keep getting ideas and tools that will keep you moving forward. If you're not already receiving the weekly articles, please subscribe at this link.

Bringing smart ideas to the table isn't enough; we also need to be able to sell those ideas. The best idea communicated poorly will fare much worse than a mediocre idea communicated well. In this episode, I'll examine what you can do to help your ideas take off. Six mistakes you may be making when pitching a great idea: 1) Neglecting to interact with the people who are impacted most by your idea. 2) Ignoring people who could help you. 3) Spending too much time on the unimportant details. 4) Assuming the "pitch" is the decision point. 5) Failing to strategize how to work around obstacles. 6) Hesitating on bad news. Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

JoAnne Norton: Family Business Consulting Group Family businesses account for 60% of all jobs in the United States and 98% of all companies elsewhere. The dynamics of family business are unique and communication becomes even more critical. In this episode, I interview family business consultant JoAnne Norton of the Family Business Consulting Group on how family business can prosper from one generation to the next with effective communication. Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

As our careers grow, we get more and more opportunities to attend conferences. Most people fail to maximize what they can gain from a conference. In this episode, I interview experienced conference-goer and speaker Charles Max Wood of Ruby Rogues and Javascript Jabber on how he maximizes the value he gets from conferences. Community Feedback USA: (949) 38-LEARN Global: +1 (949) 385-3276 Twitter: @DaveStachowiak #CFLshow feedback@coachingforleaders.com My guest this week is: Charles Max Wood of the Ruby Rogues and Javascript Jabber podcasts Learn Ruby on Rails at Chuck's site: Rails Ramp Up Twitter: @cmaxw Community Feedback USA: (949) 38-LEARN Global: +1 (949) 385-3276 Twitter: @DaveStachowiak #CFLshow feedback@coachingforleaders.com Thank you to Jeffrey Powers, Eveliina Vuolli, Cesar Abeid, Suzie Farthing, Michael Farthing, Risto Mononen, Kristie Cole, and Christina Caesar for either liking our page on Facebook or following me on Google+ A special thank you to Suzie Farthing for writing an iTunes review of our show this past week. Want a booster-shot mid-week? I send a weekly article via email so you can stay connected with our community and keep getting ideas and tools that will keep you moving forward. If you're not already receiving the weekly articles, please subscribe at this link.

What does a groundhog have to do with how to talk to people on their birthdays? In this episode, Bonni and I tell you how, and also give plenty of direction on how to connect with people in genuine ways on birthdays (or any other days that are important to them). Community Feedback USA: (949) 38-LEARN Global: +1 (949) 385-3276 Twitter: @DaveStachowiak #CFLshow feedback@coachingforleaders.com Going squarely into the category of "things you never thought you'd hear on this show," I spend a little time talking about the history of Groundhog Day and why it's a special day in our family. Where people go wrong on birthdays and other important occasions: Many of have defaulted to no more than "HBD" on Facebook or other social media Some people even send birthday cards and just sign their names (gasp!) We've lost the personal touch I ever get robocalls now on my birthday How you can be better Have something to remind you (but not automated to send to the other party) Avoid the obligatory stuff you do because you feel like you have to Focus on the people who are close to you first and spend more time engaging with them on special days Instead of a "happy birthday," how about sharing why you are grateful that that person showed up in your life I record a brief audio greeting for special people in my life to share why I'm grateful for them Whatever you do, make the personal connection...and do it sincerely Community Feedback USA: (949) 38-LEARN Global: +1 (949) 385-3276 Twitter: @DaveStachowiak #CFLshow feedback@coachingforleaders.com Thank you to Garry Shortt, Duke Whitman, and Tremayne Harris for liking our page on Facebook! Thank you to Stefan Schulz, Samuel Lewis, John Lee, Karen Kalinski, Chuck Wood, Francesc Filiberto, Suzie Farthing, Werner Zgorski, and Jeffrey Wolfe for following me on Google+ Want a booster-shot mid-week? I send a weekly article via email so you can stay connected with our community and keep getting ideas and tools that will keep you moving forward. If you're not already receiving the weekly articles, you can subscribe at this link.

Bonni and I get together on this episode to examine some ways we've been stubborn as leaders, why it happens, and what we can do about it. We also discuss how we can work to prevent getting into this ineffective pattern. Community Feedback USA: (949) 38-LEARN Global: +1 (949) 385-3276 Twitter: @DaveStachowiak #CFLshow feedback@coachingforleaders.com We discuss a few examples of stubbornness showing up in our work and lives. Some of the reasons that we fall into a pattern of being stubborn: 1) We are perceived as experts in our field or topic (or we've convinced ourselves of this) and it simply doesn't occur to us that we might be wrong about anything related to it. 2) We decided that we know enough about the situation, topic, or problem already and refuse to put in effort to discover more. 3) We need to fight every batte instead of carefully choosing them. 4) We miss the grey areas with people that make each situation unique and worthy of different types of responses from us. How We Can Work To Fix It:  1) Let's examine how we react or respond when people bring us new ideas, suggestions, or changes - we can notice this ourselves, solicit feedback, or do assessment work. Either way, its important to become aware of our own patterns and tendencies. 2) We need to decide what shift (if any) is important for us to avoid stubbornness. For Dave, this shift is spending more time listening and less time explaining. 3) Find a way to hold yourself accountable for the results you want. If we're not holding ourselves accountable in some way, then we don't have sustainable change. 4) Find a shared truth (not just my truth or your truth - but a truth we can hold together). 5) Surround yourself with people who support you - Dave mentions how Bonni has been a big support in this way. Books We Mentioned on This Show: Getting to Yes by Fisher and Ury Getting Past No by Ury Difficult Conversations by Stone, Patton, Heen, and Fisher The Abilene Paradox by Harvey Community Feedback USA: (949) 38-LEARN Global: +1 (949) 385-3276 Twitter: @DaveStachowiak #CFLshow feedback@coachingforleaders.com Thank you to Francesc Filiberto, Jacki Chaves Gonzalez, John Lee, Muralidhar Pydipalli, Suneetha Rayidi, Trina Roach, and Kristen Achzinger for liking our page on Facebook! If you are a Google+ user, connect with me there at: coachingforleaders.com/plus Want a booster-shot mid-week? I send a weekly article via email so you can stay connected with our community and keep getting ideas and tools that will keep you moving forward. If you're not already receiving the weekly articles, you can subscribe at this link.

The New Year is a natural time to think about renewal and how to be more effective as a leader. However, some of the typical things many of us do with New Year's resolutions often end in failure - 88% of the time, according to one study. I look at how three words can help you set the stage for your development actions this year. Community Feedback USA: (949) 38-LEARN Global: +1 (949) 385-3276 Twitter: @DaveStachowiak #CFLshow feedback@coachingforleaders.com I discuss how running a marathon helped me understand why so many of us have a hard time tackling so many goals at once. The problem with resolutions: A study by Richard Wiesman in the UK followed 3,000 people for a year and determined that only 12% of people actually fulfill their New Year's resolutions Intention is easy - but putting the time into action is hard We are going to hit obstacles we don't anticipate We we bit off more than we can chew, our systems can crumble. I talk about how I made this mistake a bit last year in my planning (see episode #23) and why I tried to do too much all at once. What works better: Reflect on the past year. Ask yourself: What did I do well last year? Where did I fall short? Ask people around you the same questions - talk to people you trust Look at assessments, 360s, performance reviews Examine patterns you are seeing with your team or group of people you lead - it get magnified What are the general themes that emerge of what you want to do differently? One example for me - interaction with others and social media Find three words that can meet it (check out this great article on the topic by Chris Brogan) My three: Show Up, Flexibility, and Collaboration Start with one goal that will lead you there Communicate it: Have your 3 words visible Share your words with others Ask others to give feedback/coaching on this This is an effective way to connect with your team as well, as it's simple for people to remember your goals I'd love to hear your 3 - and also I'd love to hear what works for you in your self-development at the beginning of a year. Comment on the show below - even if it's July. The key is getting started! Community Feedback USA: (949) 38-LEARN Global: +1 (949) 385-3276 Twitter: @DaveStachowiak #CFLshow feedback@coachingforleaders.com Thank you to Patrick Donigan, Dhe Dela Cruz, Selah Cosentino, Jennifer Stoviak Walsh, and Marianne Pal Hegedus for liking our page on Facebook! I'm getting active on Google+ as well. If you are a Google+ user, connect with me there at: coachingforleaders.com/plus Want a booster-shot mid-week? I send a weekly article via email so you can stay connected with our community and keep getting ideas and tools that will keep you moving forward. If you're not already receiving the weekly articles, you can subscribe at this link.

All of us are trying to be effective while handling some level of chaos, yet some are more efficient in getting it all done than others. Dave responds to a listener question and gives suggestions for how to get it all done when the reason you aren't getting it done is because you have too much on your plate. 1) Figure out what you need to do exclusively, that no one else can do Look at the last really full week you had... What could you teach someone else to do? Are you believing the fallacy that no one else could do as good a job as you on all your tasks? 2) Have defined outcomes for a specific timeframe Contract with your manager on what outcomes are most important Remember that you can't hit a target that you don't have Keep these priorities simple and easily trackable. The SMART framework can be helpful (see episode #15) 3) Do quality work (be careful about just focusing on speed) Figure out what performance metrics are important to your organization Meet or exceed those metrics If you don't have clarity, try to find out how your leaders are measured 4) Come to the table with solutions Present challenges with the scope of work and give realistic projections backed up with evidence Allow your leader to participate in the decision you've made on priorities What not to say? My team has too much work and is overwhelmed (that's not taking ownership) 5) Learn how to say no You can't be everything to everybody Set boundaries in advance and trust your gut reactions Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

It's understandable that many of us would want to take positive actions to be an effective leader. While positive steps are important, our experience has been that first stopping the things that aren't working will get you faster results. In this week's show, we look at what you should stop saying to the people you lead. Community Feedback USA: (949) 38-LEARN Global: +1 (949) 385-3276 Twitter: @DaveStachowiak #CFLshow feedback@coachingforleaders.com What is said: "I don't mean to be xxxxx, but..." What you teach people: I likely am whatever I just said that I don't mean to be What is said: "But..." What you teach people: Ignore everything I said before I said the word "but" What is said: "Well, to be honest with you..." What you teach people: I'm not always honest all of the time What is said: "You made me feel..." What you teach people: Confusion, since nobody can make you feel anything What is said: Anger expressed at someone bringing bad news, even if they didn't cause it What you teach people: Don't ever bring me bad news What is said: I'm going to be the devil's advocate here... What you teach people: I either like arguing for the sake of arguing or I'm not willing to own my opinions What is said: Giving your own opinion after asking someone for feedback What you teach people: You don't really care about what they think Bonni also mentioned the 6 Thinking Hats as a model for more effective dialogue Community Feedback USA: (949) 38-LEARN Global: +1 (949) 385-3276 Twitter: @DaveStachowiak #CFLshow feedback@coachingforleaders.com One of our listeners asked, "When someone who has authority over me lashes out…what should I do?" We discuss some options. We also spend a few minutes discussing the incident in Connecticut this past week and implications for leaders. One Coaching for Leaders article is showing up weekly in your inbox - stay connected with the show mid-week and keep getting ideas and tools that will keep you moving forward. If you're not already receiving the weekly articles, you can subscribe at this link. Wherever you are in the world, whatever is on your agenda today, take one idea from this show to engage and develop someone you lead.

All of us are being bombarded by so much information and data that we can barely keep up. If we want to be able to influence more effectively, we need to be able to do it concisely. Bonni and I discuss strategies for making this happen. Mark Twain received the following telegram from a publisher: NEED 2-PAGE SHORT STORY TWO DAYS. And famously replied... NO CAN DO 2 PAGES TWO DAYS. CAN DO 30 PAGES 2 DAYS. NEED 30 DAYS TO DO 2 PAGES. In his book Information Anxiety, Richard Saul Wurman states that a standard issue of the New York Times contains more information than a citizen of 17th England would have absorbed in their entire lifetime. The problem? Many people will tune us out when we are not concise. People stop taking calls or are often "unavailable" from people who can't be concise. Lots of people will stop seeking advice from someone who can't give it concisely. We don't have credibility with most audiences if we can't communicate what we know concisely. What are the causes? For many of my clients, their technical training works against them in communicating concisely. People believe (falsely) that they are more credible the longer they speak. Not true...it's about quality, not quantity. The "PowerPoint culture" in many organizations has reinforced the myth that more information in slides is better when presentation information. Most of the time, it's not - less is more. Since making something concise takes time and investment, some of us simply just don't want to do it out of laziness...even when we know it would help the audience. Selfishness sometimes creeps in - we like to hear ourselves talk and we forget that our purpose is to add value for the audience, not to look good ourselves. What are the solutions? Ask yourself if what you are about the communicate is really essential to the overall message? If you put yourself in the audience's shows, would you really care about what it is you are about to say? Have someone you trust who knows your audience listen to what you are going to say before you get in front of your manager, a meeting, or a large presentation. Budget time to edit down what you are saying to make it more concise. Suggestions for implementation: Have firm standards on your conciseness and stick to them... As an example, this show is almost always 40 minutes or less. My weekly articles are 500 words or less Join Toastmasters and get practice speaking concisely Attend the Dale Carnegie Course and learn and use many models to get ideas across quickly. Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.