

Coaching for Leaders
Dave Stachowiak
Leaders aren’t born; they’re made. Many leaders reach points in their careers where what worked yesterday doesn’t work today. This Monday show helps leaders thrive at these key inflection points. Independently produced weekly since 2011, Dr. Dave Stachowiak shares insights from a decade of leading a global leadership academy, plus more than 15 years of leadership at Dale Carnegie. Bestselling authors, proven leaders, expert thinkers, and deep conversation have attracted 50 million downloads and over 300,000 followers. Join the FREE membership to search the entire leadership and management library by topic at CoachingforLeaders.com
Episodes
Mentioned books

Jul 20, 2015 • 40min
202: Practical Action for Productivity, with Tim Stringer
Tim Stringer
Technically Simple
Tim appeared on two past shows:
Episode 151: How to Be More Productive
Episode 183: Use Technology To Build and Strengthen Relationships
4 Pillars of Holistic Productivity
1. Inner Reflection
Tim recommended The Way We’re Working Isn’t Working* by Tony Schwartz
2. Acceptance
“No matter how busy I am, I always have time to talk about how busy I am.” -Tim Stringer (echoing a human truth)
“It’s pretty hard to be a victim and be grateful at the same time.” -Tim Stringer
3. Focus
4. Inspired Action
Tim mentioned the Day One app.
On Thursday, July 30th @ 10am PDT / 1pm EDT, Tim and I will be hosting a How to Step Into Action With Holistic Productivity webinar. You’ll get:
Identify a strategic area for focus
Determine your first actions to create a positive shift
Connect and get inspired by other members of the community
If you agree to appear on video, reserve your free space at:
http://coachingforleaders.com/stepintoaction
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Jul 13, 2015 • 41min
201: How Introverts Make Great Leaders, with Beth Buelow
Beth Buelow (Facebook)
Author, The Introvert Entrepreneur: Amplify Your Strengths and Create Success on Your Own Terms*
Host, The Introvert Entrepreneur podcast
There is often an overt expectation of extroversion in the workplace.
Extraversion: gain energy from social interaction and external stimuli
Introversion: gain energy from quiet and solitude
“The goal is not to be the fake extrovert. The goal is to be the authentic introvert.” -Beth Buelow
Beth mentioned Good to Great* by Jim Collins
Dave mentioned How to Win Friends and Influence People* by Dale Carnegie
“Please oh please, don’t confuse enthusiasm with noise.” -Beth Buelow
Dave mentioned episode #44: Susan Cain on The Power of Introverts
Beth mentioned some of the principles from Dale Carnegie that relate directly to introverted energy. Carnegie’s principles also demonstrate that introverts make great leaders:
Become genuinely interested in other people.
Smile.
Be a good listener. Encourage other people to talk about themselves.
Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
Do not imitate others.
Beth mentioned How to Stop Worrying and Start Living* by Dale Carnegie
“Listen contains the same letters as silent.” -Beth Buelow
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Jul 6, 2015 • 34min
200: How to Plan Your Career, with Bonni Stachowiak
Bonni Stachowiak: Teaching in Higher Ed
Bonni is the host of the Teaching in Higher Ed podcast, Dean of Teaching and Learning and Professor of Business and Management at Vanguard University, and my life partner. Prior to her academic career, she was a human resources consultant and executive officer for a publicly traded company. Bonni is the author of The Productive Online and Offline Professor: A Practical Guide*.
Audio Question from Jignesh
Here are the resources we mentioned on how to plan your career:
Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi*
What Color Is Your Parachute? by Richard N. Bolles*
Carnegie Coach episode #148: How to Determine What’s Next
Business Model You by Tim Clark, Alexander Osterwalder, and Yves Pigneur*
Business Model Generation by Alexander Osterwalder and Yves Pigneur*
Finding the Career That Fits You*
The Ultimate Guide to Using Your Strengths to Get Hired*
Audio Question from Mia
“A lot of times people use humor in an attempt to try avoid having conflict or having a real conversation.” -Bonni Stachowiak
Bonni recommended an episode of the This is Your Life podcast by Michael Hyatt called 7 Actions to Take Before You Quit Your Job.
Question from Taylor
I remember listening to a podcast where you, at least I think it was your podcast, talked about self-development. Specifically you discussed using a task manager to help you achieve your self-development goals. I can not remember which episode this was. It would be really helpful if you could direct me to the right one; I would really like to send it to my father.
Dave recommended these apps/services:
OmniFocus*
Todoist
Question from Jeffrey
I’ve really admired the ability to use humor to defuse tense situations whether in the board room or one-on-one. It often lowers the volume of a confrontation and allows a moment for those involved to reset. How mad can you be when you are laughing? But it is also risky to use humor since the joke could fall flat, or even worse you might offend your counterparts. Do you have any resources on how I can improve my utilization of humor in these situations?
Question from Ravi
Hi Dave, I have been listening to your podcast for past 5 months. Have learned a lot. Thanks for great advice all around. I am facing one problem that I am really struggling with and will welcome your advice. I seem to have hit a ceiling in my career. By measure of my education and experiences should have been in a Senior Management position. I look around and all my friends and peers at one time (and those even behind me) have been steadily climbing the ladder and I am frustratingly stuck at the same place! I have all received good to excellent feedback, have been commended for my attitude and thinking, done more than my peers but am still stuck! Any advice what I can do? Happy to share more information about my background if it will help.
Bonni recommended Hope for the Flowers by Trina Paulus*
Question from Rijul
I was wondering if you could share a bit more about your own professional history in how you got into this career path. I am interested in exploring this area and would like to know what kind of jobs and/or educational background someone in this line of work has to become successful.
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Jun 29, 2015 • 37min
199: Men and Women at Work, with Lori Ann Davis
Lori Ann Davis
Author, Unmasking Secrets to Unstoppable Relationships*
Dave mentioned the podcast StartUp
A few general patterns of both men and women:
Men:
More assertive
Communication is shorter and more direct
Problem solving main goal
Goal oriented
More independent
Women:
More tuned into emotions
Talk about the problem before acting to fix it
Need to be heard
Process oriented, ask more questions
More collaborative, build relationships
“We really would like the other person just to be like us.” -Lori Ann Davis
“We show the other person love in the way we want to be loved and the way we feel loved.” -Lori Ann Davis
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22 snips
Jun 22, 2015 • 32min
198: How to Know What to Ask, with Andrew Warner
Andrew Warner
Mixergy
Andrew’s “shoved fact” technique:
Listen carefully for the shoved fact that doesn’t otherwise belong in the conversation naturally
Make sure you’re picking the shoved fact that’s the most personal one
Ask a question about that shoved fact
Shut up
“The things you think are tough are where real life exists. That’s where you really get to know people.” -Andrew Warner
“Tell a story to illustrate your point and then make your point.” -Andrew Warner
We mentioned Andrew’s show:
Mixergy podcast
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Jun 15, 2015 • 35min
197: What This Show is About
In this episode I respond to a question from Candice that helps me articulate what this show is about.
I mentioned episode 186: How to Become a Champion with Dr. Jeff Spencer
My job is to be your archeologist.
Everyone is your superior is some way.
Yes, you can lead. And you can do it, with authenticity and integrity through consistent learning.
I mentioned Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott*
“The opposite of leadership is not failure, it’s an expectation of perfection.” -Dave Stachowiak
I mentioned Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell*
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Jun 8, 2015 • 38min
196: The Way to Make New Behaviors Stick, with Marshall Goldsmith
Marshall Goldsmith: Triggers
Marshall says that a key factor is the environment around us in whether or not we are successful. Environmental triggers constantly take us off track.
“A trigger is any stimulus that influences our behavior.” -Marshall Goldsmith
Trigger —> Impulse —> Behavior
Marshall says we have the chance to have a second of awareness on how we behave after the impulse.
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” -Viktor Frankl
Marshall says that the biggest problem with successful people is they’ve gotten very used to winning.
Marshall recalled five questions that Peter Drucker said we should all ask ourselves:
What’s my mission?
Who’s the customer?
What does the customer consider value?
What’s the goal?
What’s the plan?
If you want a copy of the article that Marshall mentioned, Leadership is a contact sport, send him an email to marshall@marshallgoldsmith.com
Marshall’s wheel of change model:
Creating = Positive/Change
Preserving = Positive/Keep
Eliminate = Negative/Change
Accepting = Negative/Keep
“Am I willing at this time to make the effort required to make a positive difference on this topic?” -Marshall Goldsmith
“Most people waste most of their lives on topics they’re not going to change anyway.” -Marshall Goldsmith
“Life is easy to talk and hard to live.” -Marshall Goldsmith
“Environment vs. willpower — environment generally wins.” -Marshall Goldsmith
Marshall’s six active questions:
Did I do my best to set clear goals?
Did I do my best to make progress towards goal achievement?
Did I do my best to find meaning?
Did I do my best to be happy?
Did I do my best to build positive relationships?
Did I do my best to be fully engaged?
The key factor in employee engagement is whether people feel like they can live their own values. -Kouzes & Posner
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Jun 1, 2015 • 32min
195: Handling Someone You Don’t Trust, with Bonni Stachowiak
Bonni Stachowiak: Teaching in Higher Ed
Bonni is the host of the Teaching in Higher Ed podcast, Dean of Teaching and Learning and Professor of Business and Management at Vanguard University, and my life partner. Prior to her academic career, she was a human resources consultant and executive officer for a publicly traded company. Bonni is the author of The Productive Online and Offline Professor: A Practical Guide*.
Question from Brian
How do you battle being unmotivated? You’re boss doesn’t acknowledge your work, doesn’t acknowledge your time with the company. You feel unmotivated, unappreciated, and undervalued. You think its a personal issue that you need to fix, but you come to find out that your co-worker feels the same way, and they’ve been with the company for 20 years! How do you get out of that, or is it just a personal issue we need to get over, or do you just start looking for a new job? At what point is enough enough. I love my job, what i’m doing and the company I’m doing it for, but I feel that my uppers are a huge road block to my road to happiness. What would you do?
The Empowered Manager by Peter Block*
Question from Mark
What recommendations can you offer when it comes to working with a colleague for whom you have little faith that he will carry his weight and work toward a successful outcome for our combined group goal?
The Empowered Manager by Peter Block*
Question from Hanif
I have a request for a program in public speaking and how to control fear and anxiety. That’s my biggest weakness, so your suggestions will help.
Dave mentioned:
Toastmasters International
The Dale Carnegie Course
Questions from Kylie
Are there any organizations I can join where I can meet other OD professionals? It looks like you need to pay membership to join the OD Network (which I will if needed).
Organization Development Network
Association for Talent Development
Do you personally believe it valuable to have a Coaching qualifications if in the OD space? If so, which would you recommend?
What are your learnings in relation to OD, coaching and start-ups?
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May 25, 2015 • 42min
194: Business Results by Doing Our Greenest, with Christina Kull Martens
Christina Kull Martens
Author, Bring Your D.O.G. to Work: A (Green) Person’s Best Friend*
Christina also appeared on episode 96: How To Get Buy-In For A New Initiative
D.O.G. = doing our greenest!
We don’t tend to have as much ownership in the workplace as we do at home on sustainability and waste reduction.
“If you’re not measuring it, it doesn’t get done.” -Christina Kull Martens
Change your conversation to what the other party would find of value. The business case is what will get movement from senior leaders.
“Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.” -Dale Carnegie
Greenwashing is when you’re telling people that the organization is green (or has taken one green action) without really making it a sustainable project.
Get employee buy-in on green programs first before you start marketing to others.
Pick one thing you can get traction on first and do that well, before you try to do other projects.
Here are some of the obvious actions that leaders can take:
Office supply sharing for surplus supplies
Implement pledges for taking green actions
Read the book
Avoid motivating through fear, since that’s not sustainable — fun is sustainable!
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May 18, 2015 • 47min
193: Five Ways to Be a Go-Giver, with Bob Burg
Bob Burg
Co-Author, The Go-Giver: A Little Story About a Powerful Business Idea*
1. The Law of Value
You true worth is determined by how much more you give in value than you take in payment.
2. The Law of Compensation
Your income is determined by how many people you serve and how well you serve them.
Dave mentioned How to Win Friends & Influence People* by Dale Carnegie
3. The Law of Influence
Your influence is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interests first.
4. The Law of Authenticity
The most valuable gift you have to offer is yourself.
5. The Law of Receptivity.
The key to effective giving is to stay open to receiving.
Bob mentioned Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion* by Robert Cialdini
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