Perspective from Steve Richardson, author of Become a Better Leader in 30 Days*, on what to stop doing in leadership. Guest: Steve Richardson Author, Become A Better Leader in 30 Days* “All leaders manage, but not all managers lead.” -Steve Richardson Three things not to do when managing people Avoid managing by suggestion Managers do this when they don’t want to be accountable What do people really want from leaders? Direct Decisive Avoid managing by hoping These managers maintain a positive attitude, but don’t really know how things are going Employees learn that managers like this want to hear only good news Avoid managing by redoing Some managers take on the work of employees and will re-do it This is trap for people who were the start performers in the previous role We mentioned episode #117: The Seven Steps You Follow To Delegate Work “Doing something well myself is different than doing something well through other people.” -Steve Richardson Ask: How can I help you? The response “fine” does not necessarily mean fine Ask the next question to find out what’s really going on Steve's triangle of managing people: Fair, Friendly, and Firm One of these will typically take the lead in one situation What does this person most need right now? It takes tension to keep them in balance Let intuition govern what takes the lead in any given situation What should you stop doing? Feedback On this topic: http://coachingforleaders.com/146 Comments, questions, or feedback: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback (949) 38-LEARN Please take five minutes to complete the listener survey Thank you to weekly update subscribers Tracey Tillott-Gray, Sal Vilardo, Christine Quackenboss, Olga Correia, Tammy Ostroski, Jeff Putsch, Sharen Kreitsch, Whitney Jacobs, Christopher Naidoo, Jo Goeppner, Yosbel Lecha, and Kelvina Burrell. You can subscribe as well at http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe

Discover the world of practical typography with expert Matthew Butterick. Learn about font rankings, the impact of typographic choices in communication, and the one space vs. two debate. Explore the nuances of professional fonts and how typography can enhance writing skills.

Kent Rhodes: The Family Business Consulting Group Culture is how we do things around here. The three Levels of Culture from Edgar Schein Artifacts Espoused values Underlying assumptions Culture is difficult to identify when you are inside of it. Organizations confuse climate and culture: Climate comes from the outside and tends to be more temporary Culture is what is happening internally and more difficult to change Resources Books Organizational Culture and Leadership* by Edgar Schein Diagnosing and Changing Organizational Culture* by Kim Cameron and Robert Quinn Articles The Trader Joe's Experience by Mark Mallinger and Gerry Rossy Recognizing Organizational Culture in Managing Change by Mark Mallinger, Don Goodwin, and Tetsuya O'Hara The Competitive Advantage of Culture in a Family Business by Kelly LeCouvie and Kent Rhodes Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

You may have received training on giving feedback, but do you maximize how you receive it? On this show, discover how to get way better at accepting feedback. Guest: Sheila Heen Author with Douglas Stone of Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well* Author with Douglas Stone and Bruce Patton of the New York Times Business Bestseller Difficult Conversations* Feedback sits at the core of two human needs: Our need to get better Our need to be accepted, respected, and loved for how we are now “Who’s giving the feedback is often a louder message than what they’re saying.” -Sheila Heen The six steps: 1. Know your tendencies Baseline (or set point): a level of satisfaction that you gravitate towards in the absence of life events Swing: how far positive or negative feedback knocks you off your baseline Recovery: how long it takes you to come back to your baseline Recovery speed can be different for positive and negative feedback Understanding your profile can help you dismantle your distortions Also, this helps you to be more empathetic to others who have different styles than you do 2. Disentangle the “what” from the “who” If the feedback is wise, it shouldn’t matter who delivers it (but it does). Solicit feedback from the people who you find difficult to work with 3. Sort towards coaching Three kinds of feedback Appreciation: sometimes when people ask for more feedback, they really want more of this Coaching: helping you get better at something Evaluation: where you rank or stand Sheila uses this with her children to speak about their grades and what it says about what they can change Separating these three things is helpful, since evaluation is very loud and people don’t often hear anything else 4. Unpack the feedback Most of what we hear comes in vague labels. It requires you as a receiver to be a more active participant. 5. Ask for just one thing “What’s one thing you see me doing (or failing to do) that holds me back?” 6. Engage in small experiments “I don’t believe that receiving feedback well means that you have to take the feedback.” -Sheila Heen It’s hard to know if feedback is helpful until we try it out. Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Andrew Stenhouse: Vanguard University Dean, School for Graduate and Professional Studies Vanguard University of Southern California Loss is pervasive and we don’t often recognize how much we’re dealing with loss at the time. Three broad categories of emotions tend to show up for people during a time of workplace loss: Fear We don’t know the loss will affect us personally We don’t know how we are going to react to the loss These fears can surprise us and cause even more anxiety Anger We can be angry at the person who we lost We need to be able to express our anger in some way Anger sometimes feels good because it provides some illusion of control Sadness Anger tends to yield to sadness Guilt is the feeling that we could or should have done something We can sometimes feel guilt that we are not in as much pain as we think we should be What leaders can do after a loss: Don’t put parameters on how people are supposed to deal with loss However, provide stability and structure for people Create and lead forums for conversation The performance aspects of the job can help stabilize and reduce stress Leaders should facilitate the conversation about the loss, rather than just allowing it (or hoping for it) to happen on its own Bring in someone else to help when you see physical signs of loss “You’re always on one side or the other of a loss. You’re either approaching one or getting over one.” -Andrew Stenhouse What’s one thing you could do now to ready your organization for loss? Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Bonni and I respond to community questions this week on increasing your leadership confidence and a number of other topics. Guest: Bonni Stachowiak, Ed.D. Mishal in Saudia Arabia: How do you increase self-confidence as a new leader? Phil in the UK: What advice would you give to someone who hasn’t had the opportunity to lead people in an organization? Dave reference Coaching for Leaders episode #94: What To Do When Managing Without Authority Another article that might be helpful is 8 Ways To Influence Without Authority John: How can I build time into my day for the long-term goals? Jenn: How do you cope with a difficult coworker when your boss doesn’t want to acknowledge the problem? Dave referenced Coaching for Leaders episode #64: Eight Ways To Get Results By Managing Up Just for fun, we mentioned our Sonos PLAY:3 station* in this response Lisa shared a comment.  Lisa referenced Coaching for Leaders episode #117: The Seven Steps You Follow To Delegate Work Dave mentioned his video: How To Get Podcasts on Your iPhone for Free What’s a question you have for the next Q&A show? Feedback On this topic: http://coachingforleaders.com/141 Comments, questions, or feedback: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback (949) 38-LEARN Thank you to Lori Meeks, Agata Miezaniec, Steve Lacoursiere, Nkosikhona Nkosi, Lesley-Ann Blackburn, Valery Nguyen, Anna Thayer, Mike Cappelli, Catherine Canter, Perry Adams, Deepa Tharmaraj, Cherry Poussa, Ashley Mack, Kent Whistler, Debbie Rahn, Travis Buckner, Hermino Perez, Antonio Pizarro, Bruno Ohana, Marika Fredriksson, Kathey Howell, and Gustavo Serrano for subscribing to my weekly update this past week at http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe

As organizations ask people to collaborate more and more across virtual teams both internally and externally, many of us find ourselves reporting to lots of different people. On today’s show, how to balance it all and focus in the right places, when working with multiple bosses. Guest: Eric Ruckle, Chief Digital Strategist at Adbay It’s not about me, but about the project. Book recommendation: The Startup of You by Reid Hoffman* Book recommendation: So Good They Can’t Ignore You by Cal Newport* What’s one attitude change you can make that will help you work with multiple bosses? Feedback On this topic: http://coachingforleaders.com/140 Comments, questions, or feedback: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback (949) 38-LEARN Episode #141 (next week) is an all Q&A show. Submit your questions at http://coachingforleaders.com/speak Thank you to Roger D, Kristin Espinar, Steve Seiller, Jessica Wray, Tanya Muldrow, Andy Scheer, Matthew Opuda, Anders Moeller, Gary Thompson, Jeff Luckett, Eric Perreault, Michelle Snelling, Darryl Pitt, Laura Jasso, John Kufer, Chris Hindson, Klaus Haasis, Jeff Festa, Irma Kikvidze, Daniel Mansdoerfer, Michael Laibe, Ewa Chrominska, Michaela Lawrence Jeffery, Greta Knight, Diana Tanaka, Thomas Toeller, and Amber Sterling for subscribing to my weekly update this past week. A special thank you also Merlin, Phil, and Pete for your kind reviews on iTunes. If you would like to write a review as well, please visit http://coachingforleaders.com/itunes (for iTunes) or http://coachingforleaders.com/stitcher (for Stitcher).

Susan Gerke: GO Team Resources This model originates with Bruce Tuckman in the 1960’s Forming Storming Norming Performing Susan and I discuss the issues at each stage above and the actions that both team members and leaders can take in order to maximize team performance. There are several options when conflict emerges: Reform the team Do good Feel good Deal with the conflict There are also several ways that change itself can happen to a team: Leadership changes Membership changes Changes to the purpose and goals of the team Resources The I in Team* by Susan Gerke Go Team by Susan Gerke and David Hutchens What’s one action you will take to be more proactive with your team’s development? Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Susan Gerke: GO Team Resources Teams are different and unique Purpose Structure Stage of Development Membership Leadership When you are trying to figure out how to lead a team, 2 models can be very helpful. Types of Teams Interdependence degree of cooperation and coordination Number of meetings Content of meetings Goals —team vs. individual Reward team vs. individual Expertise Training plan Resources The I in Team* by Susan Gerke Go Team* by Susan Gerke and David Hutchens Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

John Dickson: Spokane County, Washington Here's a link to the Lean Fighter article John mentioned about some of the work he contributed to at Boeing John mentioned the learning organization that was articulated by Peter Senge. This model was made popular in Senge's book The Fifth Discipline*, which is a must-read for leaders and also appears on my Top 10 books for leaders list. “The servant-leader is servant first. It begins with the natural feeling that one wants to serve, and serve first. The conscious choice brings one to aspire to lead.” -Robert Greenleaf “Enthusiasm is the little recognized secret of success.” -Dale Carnegie A recent article from the Spokesman-Review on the new utility bill payment system that John spoke of on the show. What’s one shift you could make that would make you more like a servant leader? Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.