How To Master Your Emotions w/ This 90-Second Trick EP 1338
Oct 26, 2022
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Joan Rosenberg, a best-selling author and psychology professor at Pepperdine University, shares her insights on mastering emotions. She introduces a powerful '90-second trick' to manage difficult feelings and build unwavering confidence. The conversation dives into the importance of processing unpleasant emotions and the role of effective communication in relationships. Joan emphasizes the transformative power of vulnerability, encouraging listeners to confront discomfort for personal growth and authenticity.
Speaking up allows for personal growth, authenticity, and deepening relationships.
Embracing and understanding our emotions is necessary for personal growth and conscious decision-making.
Overcoming the fear of unpleasant feelings is crucial for honest and open conversations.
Making sense of our past experiences helps extract the good, find inner peace, and live in alignment with our values.
Deep dives
The Purpose of Speaking Up
Speaking up is not about getting what we want, but about personal growth and being true to ourselves. It allows us to be authentic and genuine, deepening our relationships and making all aspects of ourselves available for pursuing our goals and dreams.
The Importance of Facing Emotions
Many people struggle to face their emotions because it can be uncomfortable and unsettling. The bodily sensations and physical experiences that come with emotions can be painful and beyond our control. However, learning to be curious about our emotions and embracing them is essential for personal growth, building emotional intelligence, and making conscious decisions.
Understanding the Obstacles to Speaking Up
One of the primary reasons people struggle to speak up is their fear of experiencing unpleasant feelings. The discomfort and pain associated with speaking up and expressing emotions can lead individuals to disconnect, distract themselves, or avoid confrontation. Overcoming this fear and embracing the discomfort is vital to having honest and open conversations.
Importance of Making Sense of Past Experiences
Making sense of our past experiences is crucial for personal growth and inner peace. By reflecting on our past and understanding the impact and meaning of our life's story, we can extract the good and find the silver lining in challenging situations. This process allows us to move towards forgiveness, create a new self-image, and live in alignment with our values and aspirations.
The Five Keys to Unwavering Confidence
The speaker discusses the five keys to building unwavering confidence. The first key is the ability to experience and move through unpleasant feelings, as confidence comes from the deep sense that one can handle the emotional outcomes of life. The second key is speaking up, as it allows individuals to gain confidence through action and self-expression. Taking action is the third key, as it builds confidence and allows individuals to learn and grow. The fourth key is ending self-criticism, as harsh self-judgment depletes the immune system and prevents growth. The fifth key is accepting compliments, allowing individuals to update their self-image and receive positive feedback from others.
The Importance of Congruence
The speaker emphasizes the importance of congruence, where thoughts, feelings, words, and actions align. Being congruent leads to inner peace, deep connections with others, and a sense of purpose. It involves integrating attitudes, beliefs, values, past events, and future vision. By achieving congruence, individuals can align themselves with their desired outcomes and experience personal growth.
The Power of Speaking Up
Speaking up is a key aspect of personal growth and connection. The speaker highlights that speaking up from a kind and well-intentioned place helps individuals evolve and have meaningful connections with others. It allows for self-expression, authenticity, and the opportunity to pursue personal development by sharing thoughts, feelings, and ideas in a confident way. Speaking up also promotes personal integrity and helps individuals fully align with themselves and their values.
Joan Rosenberg, PhD, psychologist, is a best selling author, corporate wellness consultant, and media expert who is known globally as an acclaimed speaker and trainer on communication, confidence, resilience, authenticity and grief. Dr. Rosenberg is a professor of psychology at Pepperdine University.