Koshin Paley Ellison, an author and Zen priest, discusses the pitfalls of modern life, likening it to 'Zombieland' where screen addiction dilutes genuine connection. He emphasizes the importance of vulnerability in building meaningful relationships and shares tips on fostering intimacy through exercises like eye contact. Ellison also highlights the role of meditation in enhancing emotional resilience and the journey of self-reflection for deeper bonds. His insights encourage listeners to escape the mindless chase for dopamine and cultivate authentic human interactions.
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Zombieland
Modern life makes us like "zombies," constantly seeking dopamine hits from our phones.
This disconnects us, creating a "loneliness pandemic" despite physical proximity.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
Self-Awareness
Notice your actions and how they contribute to isolation.
Acknowledge your vulnerability and the fear behind your disconnection.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
Find Your Five
Identify your "five": people you can rely on for unwavering support.
If you lack such connections, actively seek community and cultivate deeper relationships.
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Awake at the Bedside is not a book about dying, but about life and what it teaches us. It focuses on caring and the true meaning of giving care. Edited by Koshin Paley Ellison and Matt Weingast, the book includes contributions from pioneers in palliative and end-of-life care, doctors, chaplains, caregivers, and poets. It provides practical insights and personal accounts to inspire, counsel, and teach, making it an indispensable resource for anyone involved in hospice work or caregiving. The book addresses essential questions about death, dying, and the current practices in palliative care, while emphasizing the importance of love, compassion, and presence in caregiving.
BOWLING ALONE
The Collapse and Revival of American Community
Robert Putnam
In 'Bowling Alone', Robert D. Putnam presents extensive data showing how Americans have become disconnected from family, friends, neighbors, and democratic structures. He argues that this decline in social capital has significant negative impacts on physical and civic health. The book explores various factors contributing to this decline, including changes in work, family structure, suburbanization, and the influence of technology such as television and the internet. Putnam also discusses historical precedents and potential solutions for reviving civic engagement and social connections.
Snow Leopard
How Legendary Writers Create A Category Of One
Category Pirates
Snow Leopard is the first writing advice book written through a Category Design lens. It guides writers on how to frame their ideas, stories, and insights to resonate with the most people possible. The book, written by the Category Pirates (Christopher Lochhead, Eddie Yoon, and Nicolas Cole), focuses on creating a category of one, mastering Obvious and Non-Obvious content, and monetizing writing in new ways. It includes frameworks such as the 5 levels of content creation (Consumption, Curation, Obvious Connection, Non-Obvious Connection, and Category Creation) and how to apply these to achieve independence, creative freedom, and exponential financial upside[1][3][5].
Modern life has turned many of us into zombies. We walk around with our noses in our phones, constantly on the hunt. We’re not looking to eat people’s brains, per se, but we are looking for mindless hits of dopamine -- from the latest headline, email, text, or “like” on our Instagram post. This has profound consequences, for us as individuals and for the society as a whole. Our guest in this episode argues that we need to wake up to this, and learn how to create human connection. Koshin Paley Ellison is an author, Zen priest, and Jungian psychotherapist. He co-founded the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care and is the author of Wholehearted: Slow Down, Help Out, Wake Up. Ellison dives into his attempts to rescue the cliche of intimacy, how to build meaningful relationships, and what it means to “Find Your Five.” He also discusses how experimenting with what he calls "healthy embarrassment" (or allowing yourself to feel exposed) makes for better relationships. In fact, he’ll model some of that for us, quite bravely. Just a note: This is a re-run from a few years back. We’re re-running a few episodes this summer to give our staff a break, and also to get some of our favorite older episodes into the ears of our many new listeners. Also: This conversation includes references to sensitive topics, including lived experiences of hatred and abuse. That said, it happens in the context of discussions about vulnerability and healing. Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/koshin-paley-ellison-repost
10% Happier with Dan Harris 
