Huberman Lab

Healing From Grief & Loss | Dr. Mary-Frances O'Connor

271 snips
Jun 2, 2025
In this discussion, Dr. Mary-Frances O'Connor, a leading expert in grief, delves into the brain’s response to loss and the critical role of emotions like guilt and anger. She explains the danger of getting stuck in grief and shares strategies for honoring memories while moving forward. The conversation highlights how grief can affect physical health and the importance of community support. O'Connor emphasizes the complexities of love intertwined with loss, promoting self-compassion and resilience as key elements in the healing journey.
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Grief vs Grieving Explained

  • Grief is the natural physical and emotional response to loss involving both grief and grieving.
  • Grieving is a process of learning to live with the loss over time, with grief waves surfacing even decades later.
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Brain's Dilemma with Death

  • Absence making the heart grow fonder reflects attachment and the belief loved ones will always be there.
  • Death creates conflict in the brain between knowing they're gone and feeling they're everlasting, triggering grief waves.
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Lived Experience of Long-Term Grief

  • Mary-Frances lost her mother after a long illness, experiencing changing emotions and evolving internal relationship.
  • Over time, she transformed anger into forgiveness and gratitude, integrating loss into her daily life.
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