Gabby Bernstein on Self-Healing with Internal Family Systems (IFS)
Feb 10, 2025
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Gabby Bernstein, a New York Times bestselling author and spiritual teacher, shares her insights on self-healing using Internal Family Systems (IFS). She introduces a four-step process for engaging with protective parts shaped by childhood traumas. Gabby discusses the transformative potential of IFS during mid-life and menopause, emphasizing self-love and community support. The conversation highlights practical tools for emotional healing and the profound connection between our inner experiences and physical well-being, all while nurturing a sense of humor throughout the challenges of this life stage.
Gabby Bernstein introduces Internal Family Systems (IFS) as a therapeutic model for understanding and healing from childhood traumas during mid-life and menopause.
The four-step IFS process involves self-check-ins, curiosity, compassionate connections, and embracing one's authentic self for emotional healing.
IFS offers practical strategies to manage stress and navigate emotional upheavals, especially beneficial for women facing menopausal changes.
Deep dives
Understanding Internal Family Systems (IFS)
Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a therapeutic model that emphasizes the existence of multiple parts within an individual, each with its own distinct roles. This concept is particularly useful for recognizing how traumatic experiences can lead to the development of protector parts, which try to manage emotions and behaviors resulting from past pain. Gabby Bernstein explains that through IFS, people can not only identify these parts but also understand their protective functions, often emerging from childhood experiences of trauma, big or small. The goal is to work with these protector parts compassionately, allowing individuals to explore and heal their inner emotional landscape.
The Four-Step Process to Connect with Your Parts
Bernstein introduces a four-step process designed to help individuals connect with and understand their internal parts. The first step involves choosing to check in with oneself rather than avoiding uncomfortable emotions or situations. Next, curiosity plays a vital role as you explore where these parts feel present in your body and gather insights about them. Finally, through compassionate connection, individuals can nurture these parts, allowing them to relax and enabling the emergence of one's authentic self, fostering a stronger sense of self-compassion.
The Importance of Self in IFS Work
The concept of 'self' in IFS is likened to an inner essence that embodies qualities such as compassion, clarity, and creativity. Bernstein emphasizes that by befriending the protector parts, one can enable this self-energy to overcome the clouds that distort their true self. As individuals release their protector parts from severe roles, they can reclaim their authentic self, which often reflects a more childlike essence, filled with joy and creativity. The transformative potential of accessing this authentic self through IFS offers healing and personal empowerment.
Applying IFS in Daily Life
The podcast includes practical examples of how to apply the IFS process in everyday situations, particularly during stressful moments. Bernstein describes how one can recognize emotional triggers, choose to pause and inwardly assess the feelings, and engage in the four-step process to facilitate healing in real time. This methodology not only helps people regain composure during conflicts but also enables them to build healthier relationships by communicating boundaries constructed from self-awareness. As one practices this approach, the ability to navigate stress and emotional upheaval becomes more natural and grounded.
Navigating Menopausal Changes with IFS
The discussion highlights how IFS can be especially beneficial for women undergoing menopausal changes, where emotional upheaval often resurfaces due to hormonal shifts. Bernstein and her interlocutor reflect on how the mind can struggle to reconcile these changes, resulting in a disconnection from one’s usual self. By utilizing IFS techniques, women can compassionately engage with their parts as they transition, enabling them to shed old patterns and embrace new identities. This holistic approach provides a route for healing that honors the complex emotional landscape women face during menopause.
Gabby Bernstein introduces how to use Internal Family Systems (IFS) as an effective tool during mid-life and menopause. Gabby explains IFS as a therapeutic model that identifies and befriends "protector parts" that emerged from childhood traumas. She describes a four-step process: choosing to check in, becoming curious, compassionately connecting, and checking for self qualities. This episode is for anyone who is ready to engage in meaningful self-exploration and transformation.
Chapters: Chapters: 0:00 Who is Gabby Berstein? 4:09 Gabby's Personal Experience with IFS 8:46 Explaining IFS 16:25 Identifying and Addressing “Protector Parts” 22:21 Practical Application of the Four-Step Process 27:21 The Role of “Self” in IFS 32:21 Navigating Menopause with IFS 37:11 Real-Life Application of IFS 41:09 The Power of Self-Help and IFS
To view full show notes, more information on our guests, resources mentioned in the episode, discount codes, transcripts, and more, visit https://drmindypelz.com/ep274
Gabby Bernstein, a #1 New York Times bestselling author, has been helping people for over eighteen years. Her books, like Self Help, The Universe Has Your Back, Super Attractor, and Happy Days, have been featured on Oprah’s SuperSoul Sunday and the New York Times. Gabby is a regular on popular media outlets and launched the gabby coaching app in 2023. Her weekly podcast, Dear Gabby, gives real-time coaching and talks about personal growth and spirituality. Gabby started with intimate conversations in New York City, but now she speaks to tens of thousands of people in sold-out venues all over the world. Check out gabbybernstein.com for more!