SuperPsyched with Dr. Adam Dorsay
#160 Why We Need to Be In Each Other's Care & How to Do It | Stan Tatkin, Psy.D.
May 16, 2023
Dr. Stan Tatkin, a relationship psychologist and author, discusses the importance of mutual care and regulation in relationships. He explains how humans are wired to regulate each other and highlights the significance of being in good order for overall well-being. The podcast also explores the attachment system, different definitions of love, and the importance of finding shared purpose in relationships.
47:28
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Quick takeaways
- Our brains are not naturally skilled in maintaining strong relationships and need active training to be good at relationships.
- Taking care of our partners and relationships should be a primary concern, as it creates a strong foundation for growth and happiness.
Deep dives
The Importance of Training our Brains for Relationships
Our brains, although highly evolved, are not naturally skilled in maintaining strong relationships. Our brains are primarily focused on survival and energy conservation, not on building and sustaining connections with others. This means that we need to actively train our brains to be good at relationships. It is essential to recognize that relationships require effort and work, and that our brains are prone to conserving energy, potentially leading to neglect of our relationships. Understanding the need for training and the effort required to maintain healthy relationships is crucial.
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