The Sacred Speaks

131: Terry Real - Redefining Masculinity: Men’s Hidden Depression & Relational Healing

Nov 11, 2025
In a thought-provoking dialogue, Terry Real, a pioneering therapist and author, delves into the hidden struggles of male depression and the warped definitions of masculinity shaped by patriarchal norms. He emphasizes how societal expectations lead men to disconnect from their emotions, often expressing their pain through anger or substance abuse. Terry advocates for a new model of masculinity founded on vulnerability, connection, and love, urging a shift in relational dynamics that empowers both men and women. His insights offer a path toward healing and wholeness in relationships.
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INSIGHT

Patriarchy Cuts Men From Their Hearts

  • Patriarchy enforces disconnection in boys, creating a covert epidemic of male suffering.
  • Reconfiguring masculinity requires reclaiming vulnerability, empathy, and relational skill.
ANECDOTE

The Napkin That Sparked The Book

  • Terry described pitching his book idea on a napkin and writing the core idea 'I Don't Want to Talk About It'.
  • That napkin crystallized his view that male depression is relational and rooted in enforced disconnection.
INSIGHT

Couples As The Crucible For Change

  • Reconnecting men within their relationships is the quickest path to healing their hidden wounds.
  • Couples become the crucible to retrain relational habits in real time.
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