10% Happier with Dan Harris

How To Stop Worrying About What People Think Of You | Michael Gervais

Mar 25, 2024

Michael Gervais, a high-performance psychologist and host of the Finding Mastery podcast, dives into the fear of other people's opinions (FOPO) and how it stifles authenticity. He explains the evolutionary roots of this fear and proposes strategies like imagination and meditation to combat it. Gervais also advocates for a shift from a performance-based to a purpose-driven identity. Through anecdotes and personal insights, he highlights the power of community, journaling, and vulnerability in fostering self-acceptance and personal growth.

01:07:06

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Michael Gervais

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Quick takeaways

FOPO is a major obstacle to potential, leading to playing it safe and valuing approval over authenticity.

Shift to a purpose-based identity reduces FOPO by focusing on contribution and fulfillment.

Practicing discernment and mindfulness helps counteract FOPO by prioritizing mastery of inner control.

Deep dives

The Dangers of FOPO: Fear of People's Opinions

FOPO, fear of people's opinions, is highlighted as a major obstacle to human potential. Dr. Michael Gervais, a high-performance psychologist, introduces the concept and emphasizes how FOPO leads to playing it safe, resistance against standing up for oneself, and valuing approval over authenticity. The podcast delves into the evolutionary roots of our social acceptance desires, explaining the detrimental impact of caring too much about the opinions of others.

Performance-based Identity

01:53

Fear of Other People's Opinions

02:03

Being Your Best in Service of Others

01:47

Distinction between Signal and Noise

02:13

Intro

3min

Overcoming the Fear of Judgment

2min

Confronting FOPO: The Fear of Other People's Opinions

24min

Navigating Identity and Control: Overcoming FOPO

4min

Navigating Authenticity and Purpose

17min

Meditation and Mindfulness as Tools Against FOPO

3min

Journaling and Psychological Safety

16min

Embracing Vulnerability and Growth

5min

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Why fear of other people’s opinions (FOPO) holds us back, and what to do about it.

Michael Gervais is a high performance psychologist and the host of the Finding Mastery podcast. His new book is called The First Rule of Mastery: Stop Worrying About What People Think of You.

In this episode we talk about:

A handy new acronym: FOPO, Fear of People’s Opinions
How the evolutionary roots of our desire for social acceptance work against us in the modern world
Why caring about what others think is not the same thing as worrying about what others think
The difference between a purpose-based identity and a performance-based identity
The anti-FOPO power of things like: imagination, journaling, meditation, social support, and considering your mortality
Why focusing less on yourself can be the greatest bulwark against FOPO

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10% Happier with Dan Harris

How To Stop Worrying About What People Think Of You | Michael Gervais

Episode guests

Podcast summary created with Snipd AI

Quick takeaways

Deep dives

The Dangers of FOPO: Fear of People's Opinions

Transitioning from Performance to Purpose-based Identity

Building Resilience Through Discernment and Self-Interest

Mastering What's in Your Control

Overcoming FOPO Through Mindfulness and Journaling

Performance-based Identity

Fear of Other People's Opinions

Being Your Best in Service of Others

Distinction between Signal and Noise

Get the Snipd
podcast app

AI-powered
podcast player

Discover
highlights

Save any
moment

Share
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highlights

10% Happier with Dan Harris

How To Stop Worrying About What People Think Of You | Michael Gervais

Episode guests

Podcast summary created with Snipd AI

Quick takeaways

Deep dives

The Dangers of FOPO: Fear of People's Opinions

Transitioning from Performance to Purpose-based Identity

Building Resilience Through Discernment and Self-Interest

Mastering What's in Your Control

Overcoming FOPO Through Mindfulness and Journaling

Performance-based Identity

Fear of Other People's Opinions

Being Your Best in Service of Others

Distinction between Signal and Noise

Get the Snipdpodcast app

AI-poweredpodcast player

Discoverhighlights

Save anymoment

Share& Export

AI-poweredpodcast player

Discoverhighlights

Get the Snipd
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